~
Squall sat patiently beside Quistis' sofa, in a chair he had pulled up from the kitchen. He had covered her with blankets, which consciously or not, she had lightly cuddled into, and smiled. Her fever had faded long ago; Squall no longer needed the cold compress he had made for her forehead.
That was close, he said to himself, for perhaps the thousandth time. That was awfully close. I've never felt such a strong poison...it had her completely paralyzed...
He shook off the awful thoughts. She's fine, she'll be all right. I wish she'd wake up, thought...just for a moment, just to give me a sign. I could cast another cure, just to be sure. But she'd be asleep for hours longer if I did. I'll just wait.
Quistis rolled lightly in her makeshift bed. The tension he once saw on her face had long washed away. She sighed again, with another little smile.
Squall felt himself blush; he shook his head, and buried his face in his hands. I'm tired. I've been sitting here for hours. I need something to do. But I can't just leave her here...I can't let her wake up by herself. Not after something so horrible as that. I need to find out who...
He snapped up his head. What...what if this isn't her place? Hyne, she could have been abducted for all I know! We could both be in danger! I've got to wake her, or get us out of here...
The door burst open. A young man lumbered into the doorway. He was palefaced, scarred and bald, with lined tattoos running over his scalp. His ears were covered with circular metal implants. A heavy, worn-down suit of battle armor adorned him, and it shone an unsettling neon hue.
"Hey, Quistis?" he called wearily. "I'm home! And in case you're wondering, I found..."
Squall leapt from his chair and retrieved a handgun from his belt, pointing it the young man's way. "Who's there!" he cried.
The soldier pulled up a handgun of his own, considerably larger than Squall's. "The hell are you!" he replied irately, and not the least bit threatened.
"What are you doing with her?" sneered Squall, pointing to the couch with his free hand.
"What are you doing in my room with a gun?!"
A female voice from behind the doorway interrupted them both. "Wait! Hold it! What's going on?"
A young, brown-haired woman shoved the soldier aside. Squall gasped, it's Selphie!
Selphie took a single look, and dropped her jaw. She squealed in joy. "Squa-all! It's you!"
Squall tried his best smile, which he assumed looked rather pathetic. He still held his gun to the soldier."Uh, hi! Selphie, do you...um..." he alluded with a nod toward the man, "do you know him?"
Selphie laughed. "Of course!" She shoved the man's pistol aside brashly. "Put that thing away! And Squall," she said, turning once again to him, "this is a very close friend of ours, Aren Bowes! I'm sorry guys, this...looks a little akward..."
Squall flipped his pistol around, holding the barrel. "Squall Leonhart," he nodded uncomfortably. "Nice to meet you. Catch." He threw the gun to Bowes.
"You don't say," replied Bowes rather animately, catching the gun. "I've read about you. What are..."
Selphie pushed him aside and ran to Squall, arms open with a beaming smile. Uh oh, thought Squall, here it comes...
But Selphie seemed to catch his discomfort. She skidded abruptly to a halt before him, and instead offered a courteous wave. "Heh, hey Squall! It's great to see you..."
Judging by the look that came next on her face, she was thrown for a loop. Squall stepped forward and gave her a hug. Not a good hug by any account; he was far too uncomfortable, but at least he was giving it a shot. Selphie dropped her confused gaze after a moment, and squezed her frind tight.
"You too," replied Squall. He pulled her away, almost jokingly, in an 'all right, that's enough' fashion. "I got a message from Cid that you were in trouble. I'm pretty sure I know the whole story..."
Bowes laughed. "I doubt it. I don't think we know the whole story." He shook hands with Squall. "Good to have you aboard."
Movement from the sofa made them all quiet down. Quistis yawned, and sat up groggily. "Mmhh...what's...what's going on?"
Selphie pounced on the bed and tossed them both off. "Hey, Quisty! We're back! And guess who we brought with us!"
Squall shook his head. "It doesn't take much, does it?" he half-smiled.
"Very, very little," Aren laughed in reply.
Quistis dug herself out from the mess of blankets. "What...wait! Wataminnit, hold on!" she moaned irately. "I can't...can't even see straight!" The group laughed once more; Selphie helped to pull her the rest of the way out. Quistis straightened her robe and rubbed her eyes.
"...Selphie!" she cried, grabbing her by the arms, "you're back! I can't believe you...why in Hyne's name would you...well...you're lucky to be alive, you know that?!"
"I know, I know," said Selphie. "That one ranks high on the 'stupidest things I've done' list...but Aren found me and brought me back."
Quistis gave Selphie a hug. "Don't do that, all right?" She got a nod from Selphie. But the perky young lady raised an eyebrow, and pointed silently over the sofa.
Squall watched as Quistis stood. Her eyes brightened and she smiled. "Squall! That was...I...I mean...it's you!"
He offered another uncomfortable smile, reached over the sofa and hugged her. "Hey."
"Okay! Okay, wait!" Selphie jumped in place excitedly. "You gotta tell us how you've been! Hang on, wait right here, I'll go make some coffee...it's four in the morning and I'm exhausted!"
"Could've fooled me," smiled Aren. "If you all don't mind, I'm gonna go find some clothes to change into."
Selphie and Bowes disappeared around the corner of the kitchen. Quistis sat tiredly on the sofa; she looked around nervously. Squall leaned against the wall, as nonchalantly as possible.
"Oh, gosh!" Quistis finally laughed. "Here, have a seat!"
Squall nodded as she scooted over, and he sat down beside her. "You had me worried when I showed up," he said.
Quistis nodded, and grimaced an embarrassed smile. "I...I know...I guess I get a little worked up at times. Well, you'd remember..."
Squall shook his head. A lock of auburn hair fell over his eyes; he scrambled angrily to brush it away. "No," he said, "I think there was something else involved. Not to worry you...but I think you might have been poisoned."
He watched her eyes close in exasperation as she dropped her head. "You know...I wouldn't be surprised. It's been horrible lately...and I wonder if it could possibly get worse, and I get poisoned."
She raised her eyes to his, and stared for a long time. He remembered hating these moments, and he remembered why. What was she trying to say? Did she want something from him? Was she still in danger?
I can't stand this, he thought. He could not return her gaze. Looking into the eyes of a friend, this sort of thing always caught him off guard. I'll never figure her out like this. I can't. Why am I even...
But he swallowed hard, and pushed his discomfort aside. I can't just sit here...and not even try.
He met her eyes, their icy blue, and the tears that were forming below them. He focused on his friend; he fought every urge to turn away. And he found that the longer he looked, the easier it became.
She...looks sad. And weak...almost desparate...that was never like her...
Quistis took a breath. She quickly blinked away the tears, smiled courteously and lowered her gaze. She rubbed her face vigorously with her white sleeves. "Heh...sorry...still a little tired..." she trailed.
Selphie leapt from behind them onto the floor. "Okay, I can't even wait! Screw the coffee! Start spillin', mister!"
Squall shrugged and leaned back. Well...okay, sure. Where should I start?"
"Anywhere!" said Selphie. "Like...Hyne, what've you been doing for two years? How come you're here? Are you gonna stay? And what about everyone else?" As she spoke, Aren sat down beside her, dressed in a red hooded sweatshirt and grey sweatpants.
"Well," said Squall, "I'm still with Garden. Just not Balamb. I had some disagreements with Cid and we parted ways."
"You didn't take the commander's position?" asked Selphie.
"No," he replied. "I didn't want it."
"Well Hyne, what better job could you have?"
Quistis had wrapped herself back up in the blankets, obviously embarrassed that she was still dressed in a bathrobe. "Yes," she said, "I thought you were thrilled with the position."
Squall shrugged. "I thought it over. Wasn't the thing for me." He turned once again to Selphie. "I'm a teacher now."
Selphie was floored; she slapped the ground with her hand. But Squall had been trying to watch for Quistis' reaction, looking out of the corner of his eye. She took a short breath, covered her mouth, and blinked in surprise.
"Well, who'd have thought!" Selphie chuckled. "The great Squall Leonhart settled down to teach!"
Quistis seemed offended by her good-natured remark; she shrank her head into the blankets a bit. Squall did not particularly like the comment himself. "Well," he replied, "I like it better. It's rewarding."
He paused, and tried out the thought waiting in his mind. "And I respected my Instructors very much. I'd like to think someone will have that respect for me someday."
Quistis poked her head from the blanket cocoon. "That's...that's very interesting," she said quietly. "That you teach, that is...uhm, where did you end up?"
Squall loosened his gloves and pulled them off. "I travel, mostly. Most of my time goes to giving speeches, and meeting with each Garden's board of education. I've spent the last two years studying Guardian Forces."
"GF's?" Selphie was more than a little surprised at the mention of Guardian Forces. "Squall, I thought we couldn't use Guardian Forces! The side effects, you know? Our memories? I...thought we all made an agreement!"
Squall thought back: once they had defeated Ultimecia, the group had agreed to disband their junctions with Guardian Forces. It had already been two years since that time; he could barely believe it.
"We did," said Squall. "But there's a lot we didn't know about GF's back then. It's a long story." He rubbed his tiring eyes. "But...I guess that's my last couple of years."
"Well, that's really cool!" said Selphie. "So, what's next..." She rubbed her little chin, and then snapped her finger. "Ah! I knew I'd forgotten something! How's Rinoa?"
Squall's eyes were no longer tired. He flashed them wide open. To his surprise, Quistis was also animate at the mention of Rinoa's name. She shook her head violently, mouthing no, no, no. Squall turned to her; she stopped immediately.
What do I say? he thought. They're so happy I'm here...I can't just...
He forced a smile, and took a long breath. "She's fine, just fine. We're not...well...we're not together...but she's happier this way."
Selphie took a short gasp. "Oh, Squall! I'm sorry! I didn't know....gosh, I hope I didn't ruin the night!"
"No, that's all right," he said quietly. "Really, it's not an issue at all."
Aren stood and stretched. "Well, I hate to cut this short, but I've had a really long night. I'm gonna get a little rest. Anybody else finally ready for sleep?"
Selphie yawned deeply, though she seemed just as energetic as ever. "I sure am! Squall, are you staying? Please say you're staying!"
"Yeah," he nodded quietly.
"Great! I really hate to just leave you like this, I just wanna catch up all night!"
He waved them off. "We'll do it tomorrow. It's late. I'm fine."
Selphie gave him one more hug. "Oh, it's so good to see you again! G'night, seeya tomorrow!"
He bid her goodnight, and once again apologized to Bowes, who laughed and offered his own apology in return. Selphie and Aren retreated around the corner once again, leaving a brewing pot of coffee unattended.
Quistis turned, and looked over Squall's shoulder, watching Aren and Selphie disappear. Squall was arching his neck as well, though it was more to gain some distance from Quistis than to see Bowes and Selphie off. You're pathetic, he said to himself. You know that?
Quistis quickly turned herself around, and sat rigidly on the sofa. Almost as rigidly as Squall; he was a little perplexed at noticing this. She must be exhausted, or stressed...just look at her...she's not herself.
Oh, how in Hyne's name should I know. She's probably creeped out by me, or something. I did just appear here, for Hyne's sake. And it's not like she's said anything. I wouldn't know.
But Squall kicked himself mentally. That attitude never got him anywhere, and it never helped his friends one bit. He suppressed his anxiety, tossed out his negative thoughts, and looked again at her eyes.
She was already looking at his; he had not noticed. It shocked him. But that was Squall, after all. Always overlooking the obvious. He needed to work on that.
Her expression caused him fear; he had never seen Quistis with such a look in her eyes. It faced him again; a desparate gaze, a horrible and voiceless plea for help. Her glass-blue eyes were misted by welling tears. Such a pitiful gaze he had never witnessed from the confident, professional eyes of Quistis Trepe.
The dagger of epiphany made its harrowing trip deep into Squall's heart, a gift courtesy of both memory and conscience. He had seen her look this way. He had witnessed poor Quistis begging for his aid. But only once.
And last time, he had not handled it so well.
He frantically searched his mind for something to say. Nothing: frozen, stalled, he could not come up with a thing. He cursed at his horrid antisocial self. He wondered if he looked as pathetic as he really was.
A musical tone sounded in the kitchen - a triumphant announcement that the coffee was ready. Quistis turned to look again over the sofa. She placed her hand on the cushioned seatback, and quickly, nonchalantly wiped her eyes as she glanced. Squall caught her discomfort; he cursed himself again.
Quistis faced him. "Are you tired?" she finally said, her voice carrying most of the professionalism he remembered.
"Not really," Squall replied, quickly and quietly as always. Nothing more to say, never the conversationalist.
She nodded toward the pot of coffee. "Feel like talking?"
"Sure," he nodded. And he surprised himself. He smiled. Not forced, not his usual painful smile. He only imagined how akward it must have looked, but it was his own genuine smile.
~
