Elfangel: MAINLY BY ME!
SmashingLightbulbs: Chapter 6778 Elfangel: (Coughs) Chapter 4
Disclaimer: Chapter 1!
The never-ending (storrrryyy) chapter!
InuYasha: What the FUNKY is you doing in me House?
Sessomuru: What the fudge are you talkin' bout dis ain't no bitch ass friekin' house!
InuYasha out of the blue bringing up an old argument: I 'm prettier than you are garbage slop! Because 1+1 will always =1!
Sessomuru: Why the fuck did you have to bring that bitchin' ass argument up for ass-wipe!? And 1+1=2 you ignoramus! Wait what am I…
InuYasha: What where did you get that crap from Dumbo? And I mean look at my beautiful light-blue locks! I have no spit-ends! Look non-at all! (Cooing) Go on touch it, you know you want to! (He bats his girlish eyelashes at him coyly and holds out a lock stroking it lovingly while looking as ugly as possible)
Kagome trying to end the argument but failing miserably: Hey guys, if that's what you call yourselves. I think your both are extremely putrid!
Shippou and Sango: Yeah we're with Kagome.
InuYasha and Sessomuru at the same time: WWHHAATTT!!! (They point at each of them in turn) WHAT ABOUT VOTING FOR ME!?
Sango, Shippou, and Kagome stand looking off into space while the argument gets worse, and start drooling like they are no longer living. Thus, making giant pools of saliva around them until they are soaked to the bone. (Even though it should just get wider not taller but it doesn't)
InuYasha: RRRAAWWWRRR!! (He lunges at Sessomuru and they start pulling each other's hair and trying to chew on each other's noses, and all the while growling like savage beasts)
They fall back at the same time huffing and puffing not to mention glaring wickedly.
Kagome: Their going to blow the house down!
Sango: What are you yakin' about? There are no dang houses in this house!
Shippou: What are you talking about there is no house in the twenty-third place! So you can't have a house in an apartment! You Dult! You don't even know what you're whisperin' about; you're go insane all of you! I meat turkeys can fly! Where is the clock and the hour? They have hit us like waffleball bats in the creek. The days have gone up in the west, just to go down in the east into light! (His eyes become dilated and he falls over frothing at the mouth like he's having a seizer and his tail falls off and wiggles all over the place. Out of a mysterious cloud of hot-pink butterflies, Miroku appears.)
Miroku: Hi y'all! Wuz up dawgs, what's hanging?
Sango sadly and quietly: Miroku you've changed…
Miroku: No… No! I haven't I'm so sorry (they start hugging and suffocating each other and crap like that)
InuYasha, not noticing, points at a tree: You'll vote for me won't you? (The tree "strangely" doesn't answer and InuYasha looks into the sky) I call upon the only people who can settle this problem! (And to his answer an old hoe appears!) (She has scraggily hair and is holding a bottle of nasty whiskey and is smoking a cigarette.)
The old hoe happens to have the script: (she hobbles over, trips and fall on a pool of pee, and cracks her head on a toilet) Shit!! No (huff) wait it's supposed (huff) to be the ……
Out of nowhere (yet again) the FELLOWSHIP OF THE RING appears!!
Frodo: Sam I don't think we're in Kansas any more!
Sam: What the HELL mister Frodo? We were never in "Kansas" anyway wherever or whatever that is.
Gandulf hits them on the head and knocks them out for a few moments. (NO!!! Not moments!)
Gandulf: Fool of a Took!! Oh wait that's Pippin, sorry,(he bellows and his face explodes and Pepsi flies from his mouth) FOOL OF A BAGGINS !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!(It breaks all windows in a million mile radius) huff…huff…(Quickly as though Sam doesn't matter, and because he doesn't we won't waste our precious time in capitalizing his last name) Oh yeah, fool of a gamgee too.(He falls over into a pit of extremely poisonous snakes)
Sam: Door…
Aragorn who always talks in questions: Look, there are people over there and they are standing around looking at us?
Legolas: No duh, Aragorn no duh.
Gimli, always saying the opposite of what he means: No one appears to have dog-ears, and no another seems to be missing an arm, and no one has a tail and there isn't a ugly and hideous woman. I smell very pretty, and am a chik magnet, AND I LOOK LIKE A COMPLETE GENTLEMAN!
Legolas: Of the road that leads to night and the evil that lurks in the shad… WHO FARTED?!
Gimli innocently: I didn't.
Aragorn mumbles: Yeah right?
Frodo making constipated noises between words: Haven't…complained…need to complain…can't go on…without complaining…
Sam: I will listen to your complaining, surely I will! Don't you worry! Frodo! For I am the one!
Aragorn: Yeah the only one who will listen to such crap?
Legolas: Why is everything you say, a question?
Aragorn: Because they were big, small snack fats that ate jump words in there?
Gimli trying to get all attention possible: Oh Dear Lord those bean burritos were not too much! PPPPPPUUUUUUUUULLLLLTTTTTT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (His ass spontaneously combusts and it just so happens Bomobir has a liter, he lights in front of the fart and his face explodes too)
Merry and Pippin walk out of the pub drunk and wobbly. Pippin throws up on Merry.
Merry laughs maniacally then points at the vomit: Cool it looks like a cream soda! (They fall over and crawl away to some hidden bush. (You can use your imagination as to why)
Yugio: Get the hell out of here! This is my house, my bush, get out!!!(A very sharp boot kicks out Merry and Pippin)
Merry: JEASUS THAT SMARTS, AND RIGHT WHERE THE SUN DON'T SHINE!!(He starts sobbing uncontrollably)
Yugio: My home, yes my home, its all mine, no one else's, just mine! (He pulls back into the bush and curls into a ball and rocks back and forth muttering "my home my home" but he seemed only to be reassuring himself. He starts to nibble on his rarest cards like cheap crackers)
Aragorn: AAHHH OOHHH???!!!! (He says this while slapping Yugio senseless) I will take them and beat the lives out of them??!!(He takes Merry, Pippin, and Frodo for some strange reason into the bush, and beats them one at a time against Yugio which instantly kills him)
Aragorn comes out holding the hobbits .He drops them and grins cheesily: I done ggggggooooooooodddddd!!!????
Legolas pats him on the head like a dog, throws a biscuit to him, which he eats quickly: Good boy, good Argygorn.(Aragorn rubs against his legs and purrs)
And if you haven't noticed, the Inu crew has been doing nothing as though they are dead to the world, then suddenly they come back to life, like nothing had happened. They are surrounded in a pool of their own drool. Kikiyo then appears and sucks up all the drool. And pukes it all out on Miroku.
Miroku: Goddamnit why does all that shit happen to me? Why mmmmeeee!!!???(He starts wailing like a 82-year-old baby that just crapped in its diaper)
Gandulf talking like a gang leader: Men look, there is some weird people looking at us! Com'n let's get them!
Legolas: Don't you think that is a little rash? Just a little?
Aragorn who's speech is getting worse: t'nsi taht on?
Gimli: What in the world are you talking about?
Merry: Yeah lets get thum!
Pippin: I'm all 4! Wait Merry you didn't spell "them" right and I didn't spell "for" either! Wait you said it so how CAN it be spelled wrong? Script writer!
(Gandulf's phone rings) Gandulf: Shutup y'all! Oh no not you. All right sweet freakin' baby!
Frodo in high pitched girlish voice: Oh my god he's masturbating! That's horrible and vicious and indecent!
Sam: Frodo you sound like a high school girl! And besides it's kind of funny! (He starts laughing so hard he falls over and suffocates)
Gandulf who has a HUGE cord-phone the size of a kitchen oven that isn't plugged into anything: Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhh… that's coo…
Pippin trying to sound like an intelligent doctor-person: It seems Sam has fallen asleep (Even though Sam ison the ground his face red and bile is raising out of his mouth and gurgling from suffocating himself)
Gimli: We must eat off his dead carcass like the dogs we are!!!!! (Starts feasting on Sam's body. The others inch away with scared looks on their faces)
Legolas, as the only one who is paining attention to anything ties up the Inu crew and starts to shout in their faces with spit, spewing out of THEIR mouths going everywhere covering everything.
Legolas's face is beet red as he yells at the Inu crew (he seems to resemble a trainer at a boot camp): You better address me as 'SIR YES SIR"!!!!!!!! Do I make myself clear!!
Aragorn: There is a pickled-beet in the ground, that is floating, lets eat it, and then beat it into a bloody pulp?!(he jumps on Legolas's back and gnaws at his neck) Me vampire eat blood, good for ware-wolf Argy??!!
Legolas pulls off Aragorn and glares at him. Aragorn whimpers and starts to cry: Me didn't do anything it was him!(He points at Sessomuru. Then bends his ass up to his head and craps in his hair)
Legolas: I guess I will forgive you, but please take a shower. You have crap in your hair and it's worse than your usual grease!
Aragorn runs off and takes a shower but in stead of using shampoo he uses mud and for conditioner he uses lard.
By the time he gets back, the Fellowship and Inu crew are in a living room in the biggest mansion, in mansion land, drinking expensive tea they (strangely) got out of no where and are best friends all because…
-Flash back-
InuYasha finally gets bored of playing 'me tied up' and breaks out of the ropes. He grips Gimli by the throat and amazingly lifts him up. After 2 hours of doing nothing Pippin gets spark a of intelligence: We will be your friend if you let him go!
Legolas: What in the world…
InuYasha in the most retarded voice possible: OOOOOOKKKKKKAAAAAYYYYY!!!!! (He drops Gimli and they become the bestest of friends)
-End of Flash back-
-LATER-
As they get ready to go to sleep every one hears an ear-splitting scream. They run into the bathroom to see Aragorn trying to put every ones contacts on, AT. THE. SAME. TIME! Next to him Frodo is screwing screws into his eyes making himself blind.
Sam leaps into the air jumping with all his might and topples over Frodo. He comes up holding Frodo who is in a dramatic pose
Sam: WHAT THE HELL MISTER FRODO!!! Why where you drilling screws into your eyes?
Frodo in a death scene-pose voice: I wanted them to look shiny and unusual…. (He gasps, his head falls over and his tongue falls out like in most movie death scenes)
Sam with tears in his eyes: No mister Frodo No! (He lays his head in Frodo's chest then lifts out a picture of Rosy O' Donald from one of the many pockets) What the bloody hell is this!!!!!!!
-A FEW SECONDS LATER-
Frodo wakes up: That was a good long nap (even though it was only for a few seconds)
He glares at them when he sees them paying attention to, yet again, Aragorn!!! Muttering to himself: little attention-stealing bitch….
Legolas: What the hell where you thinking!
Aragorn: I was thinking of how pretty my eyes would look if I put every ones contacts in them!!(He squeals and tries to blink but can't as there is so many contacts and starts to make constipated noises trying to close his eyes)
Kagome being ignored for the longest time can't take it any more. She then scoops out Aragorn eyes and starts to go frantic running around in circles screaming about monthly bills she gets from her cell-phone even though she doesn't own one, and ties up Aragorn saying that he is potentially dangerous.
Sango: I'm tired of this crap in my house!
She blindly kicks Frodo spastically in the head in a very deluded state, making him wither in pain. Sam jumps with all his might(again) (only jumping a few inches) and attacks her, biting and killing her face.
All of a sudden all Kagome's bills from her 'cell phone' and the bills from the 'biggest mansion in mansion land' (which she bought her self (sniff Kagome we are so proud of you, NOT!) come flying out her chimney and attack her. And guess what Harry Potter comes flying in with them with a cheesy grin on his face, which seems to have been stapled on.
Harry Potter in his horrible English accent and talking to them like he had never met them before: Hi! I'm Harry Potter, I don't believe I've met you before!(he holds out his hand for them to shake even though no one is paying attention as they are weeping because Kagome is being shipped to the hospital in an ambulance (even though it's the feudal age)
Every one: Nooooooo! (In guys case) Kagome we love you !!!(Or in girls case) You are our bestest friend!
Since Kagome is gone every one turns their attention to Harry Potter who begins talking even though no one can under stand him in his horrible accent.
Harry potter: fvdfh vgsdkufgk jsgvbjdbv jkdbhcvi uehfgk bfvidbf gljkebnf hefvkjnb rgjlhffu! Dfgudy ghjhd guy dhfgvh brkfu hdufg vudsfb vjdhfvu!
Everyone else: huhhh?
All of a sudden all the Hogwarts Prefects come and grab harry in their wicked arms.
Prefects are shaking their middle fingers (like a normal sane person would shake their index finger)
Prefects in a horrible but understandable accent: Uh, Notty Notty Little Potty! (They grab Harry and disappear in a puff of green smoke that almost poisons every one. Instead they all fall asleep.)
-Eons later-
Bomobir who is totally crazy about shields: Hey lets go get some shields!(his eyes get dilated and he jumps up and down while hugging his shield like Sam when he stares at Frodo too long and has to hug him.) Now! More shields for me! Shields! Shields! More! More! (Legolas knocks him unconscious, and suddenly Aragorn and his chair are sucked into the sky in a gust of wind)
Aragorn: I am flying, look at me, I'm a birdie?! HAHAHA…………………………………………………………………………………………….?
Legolas: I am so glad that's over!
--------SmashingLightbulbs: End of Chapter 6778! Elfangel: Durrrr… End of chapter 4!!!!!!----------
