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Summary~ Future Fic; When Sydney disappears, Vaughn is determined to find her, for his sake and their son's
A/N:first of all, let me apologize for the last chapter, it really really sucked. I haven't even read the 1 review that I got for it because it sucked so much, I tried much harder on this one and hope it is better, so please please review it!!! Oh yeah, and it's longer too, so on to chapter three
*****
Vaughn buried his face in his hands and thought for a minute *This cannot be happening. How am I going to handle a kid? He's gonna hate me, I know it, he's going to think I abandoned him and Syd and he's gonna hate me for it*
Weiss sat down next to him and started eating a sandwich. Then he noticed the look on Vaughn's face "Hey man, what's wrong? You look like you just found out that you're dying" Weiss said, "Okay sorry, that was a lame attempt to make you laugh, or at least smile, obviously it didn't work, so just tell me what's up before I pull out the knock knock jokes"
Vaughn sighed "Sydney's disappeared" he whispered quietly
"Your Sydney?" Weiss asked
"God, why do you still call her that?" Vaughn asked, getting a little bit angry "And yes, my Sydney, who else would I be talking about? And Jack is on his way here with William. Jack is gonna kill me"
"Why?" Weiss asked innocently even though he knew that answer
"Well, let's count the reasons" Vaughn said sarcastically "Number one, Its my fault that Sydney quit, therefore meaning its my fault we still don't have Sloane. Number two, I broke his daughter's heart. Number three, I am an incompetent father.."he was interrupted by Weiss before he could finish
"None of that is true and you know it, every decision that was made was made by Sydney, she broke you, not the other way around" Weiss said, trying to be a supportive friend "she kept you away man, it isn't your fault"
~Flashback~
"Michael" Sydney said quietly "I can't take it anymore. It's too risky"
"Syd, I wish it wasn't, okay?, I wish it was possible for us to always be sure our son is going to be okay, and that there are no dangers in the world, but there are baby, and there's nothing we can do about it" he responded
"Vaughn, William can't grow up the way we did. He can't always wonder what daddy really does and why he's always away for work. That can't happen, and I won't let it. He's growing up Michael, and you are not here to see it, you are always away on some damn mission" Sydney said sadly, but also with a hint of anger
"Syd, I can't quit. You know I can't. I promised you I would find Sloane, and until that happens I cannot and will not quit" Vaughn whispered as to not wake the sleeping two year old in the next room
"Then just leave" Sydney said, getting choked up "Vaughn, we can't live like this. I love you so much, you know this, and I thought I would never be able to love anyone as much as I do you" she paused and looked up at him with tears in her eyes "but William, my precious baby Will, he is my life now Michael, and we can't risk it. I love both of you too much to let anything happen to you, but I think it would be best if you would leave"
"What?" Vaughn asked, obviously hurt "Syd, I am trying, I really am. And what are you going to tell Will? If I leave, like you want me to, what are you going to tell him about his father? That I abandoned him?" Vaughn asked angrily "Because I am not choosing to leave him Syd, but I know what you mean, and I hope that someday, when things a less complicated, we can make this work" he added, kissing her softly one last time before he walked into William's room, closing the door softly behind him. He looked at the little boy who slept before him, so innocent; he had no idea about all the evil of the world. Vaughn leaned over the edge of the bed and kissed him softly on the forehead "I love you buddy, and I will miss you very much and think of you every day" Vaughn said quietly, trying to memorize everything about his son, since he had no idea when he would see him again.
~End Flashback~
Vaughn was so confused. This is what he had hoped for for the last two years, wasn't it? But he didn't want it to happen this way, he wanted Sydney to realize that she was wrong and ask him to come back into their lives. But that wouldn't happen now, Sydney was gone. Possibly for good. "Eric, how the hell am I gonna do this?" Vaughn asked, hoping for some reassuring, or at least humorous words from his best friend
"I am really not the person to ask, but my suggestion is just talk to the kid, ask him questions, find out what he likes, just be his friend first, not his dad" Weiss replied
Vaughn sat there staring, surprised that what had just come out of Weiss's mouth not only made sense, but might actually work "Okay, but he just found out his mom disappeared, he's upset, and there's a chance he remembers me as the evil guy who abandoned him" Vaughn said "I just need reassurance that he's not gonna hate me"
"He won't, let me talk to him for awhile first, I'll lighten him up, getting him to stop thinking about Syd, then you can attempt to bond with him" Weiss suggested
"Bonding? I'm not sure I can handle that" Vaughn said, a smile playing on his lips
Jack's secretary walked up "Agent Vaughn? Your son and Agent Bristow are here. They would like to see you"
"Okay, thank you" Vaughn said quietly, trying to think of something to say to his son. He then quietly walked over to Jack's desk where Jack was standing with the little boy cowering behind his leg. Vaughn crouched down so he was at eye level with Will, and finally got him to make eye contact "Hi William, I'm Michael, will you come and sit with my friend while I talk to your grandpa for a minute?"
William slowly nodded his head and Vaughn grabbed the small duffle bag that Will had brought, and showed him where his desk was. He lifted Will up into his chair and set his bag down; then turned to Weiss "Watch him for a minute, will you? I need to have a word or two with Jack" Vaughn asked
"Sure man, but remember that I know exactly nothing about entertaining kids" he warned as Vaughn walked away
"Jack" Vaughn said, terrified of facing him right now, but doing it for Will's sake "Does he know?"
"Does he know what?" Jack said, his tone harsh "does he know that his mother has disappeared? Yes. Does he know why, or how, or when she's going to be back? No, and that scares him, and I have no idea what to do about it."
Vaughn couldn't believe he had just heard Jack Bristow say he didn't know what to do "Well, I'm not sure I do either, but I think it would be best if William stayed with me while we try to find Sydney" Vaughn said quietly "I wonder if I'll even remember how to act around him, he's grown so much"
"Yeah, well two years will do that to a kid. Do you think he recognized you?"
"I really don't know, he might have, but didn't really act like he did, but I think he's still pretty freaked out by Syd being gone" Vaughn answered
"Well, just take him home, let him get some sleep, maybe tell him you are his dad tomorrow. He has enough to deal with tonight. And call me if you need anything, I'll probably be here all night trying to get a search team together" Jack said
Vaughn smiled, surprised at how sympathetic Jack was being, and went back to find William and take him home
Back at Vaughn's desk, Weiss was trying to analyze William without staring at him. Mostly Vaughn, he thought. Vaughn's eyes, nose, hair, chin. Sydney's dimples though, that was obvious. Then he noticed the basketball jersey. Sport nut. Obviously Vaughn's kid, Weiss though smiling. He noticed how uncomfortable the kid looked and tried to make small talk "So, you like basketball?"
William nodded slowly, surprised that someone had talked to him. It seemed like everyone who had seen him so far looked angry, as if he was disrupting their work just by being there.
"Are you a Lakers fan?" Weiss asked, hoping he could eventually get the kid to talk since he had no idea when Vaughn would be back again
Will nodded again, smiling a little bit of a half smile this time *that is all Vaughn* Weiss thought, thinking of all the times he had seen his best friend do that, usually while around Sydney
"That's cool, you can probably go to a game with me and your." Weiss stopped himself *Does Will know? Oh well, better play it safe* "with me and Michael sometime. What other teams do ya like kid?" Weiss asked, just to get the satisfaction of making the kid answer a question actually, not just shake or nod his head.
"Duke, Kentucky, Arizona, Kansas. All the big basketball schools" Will replied, thinking that this guy might actually want to talk to him
Weiss was impressed, for a four year old kid he sure knew his sports, maybe he should quiz Will on foreign policy next. Just then Vaughn walked up
"Hey William, I just talked to your grandpa, I'm so sorry about what happened to your mom, but your grandpa and I decided that it would be best for you to stay with me rather than him, so if you're ready, I'll get your bag and we can go. I bet you are pretty tired" Vaughn said, having no idea what to say to a kid whose mother had just disappeared
William slid out of the chair with a somber look on his face, since now he was thinking about his mom's disappearance. "Bye guys" Weiss said as Vaughn grabbed his son's bag and started walking away
"Bye" Will said quietly. Over Will's head Vaughn looked at Weiss and mouthed thank you.
~~~
About thirty minutes later Vaughn finished putting sheets onto the couch and helped Will change into his pajamas. "Hey William, can you come here for a minute?" Vaughn asked as he patted the spot next to him on the couch for the little boy to sit. As Will sat down, Vaughn took a deep breath and started to talk. "Will, I know you are upset about what happened to your mom today, but I promise you, me, and your grandpa, and Weiss are going to try our hardest to find her as soon as we can"
"Is mommy dead?" Will asked, completely out of the blue
Vaughn was taken aback "umm no Will, I don't think she is, she's just missing, but I promise you we will find her"
"Can I ask another question?" the little boy asked softly
"Of course" Vaughn said, even though he wasn't as sure as he sounded
"Um, are you my daddy?" William asked, his big green eyes staring up at Vaughn
"Yeah" Vaughn answered quietly "Yeah, I am"
This being the answer William wanted and assumed he would get, she crawled into Vaughn's lap and started sobbing into his shoulder
"Shhh, it's okay buddy" Vaughn said, trying to comfort him "I promise we'll find her, I promise.."
*****
A/N: So there it is, it actually turned out okay I think, but I kind of suck @ writing flashbacks. But please review with any feedback/suggestions that you have, I was thinking about maybe having William meet Irina in an upcoming chapter hmm I dunno tho
On a mildly related, but not really note, I am what you would call an obsessed Kansas basketball fan, and I just HAD to mention it in this chapter, and it's no like we suck, so I guess it's possible some kid halfway across the country likes them right??? But anyways, after being in mourning for several weeks after the championship game, I am finally done and guess what?!?! (Okay, this is the really unrelated part) On Wednesday, I get to meet Kirk Hinrich and Nick Collison!!! I realize that this means nothing to all of you, but they are seniors this year and I was so sad cuz I was never gonna get to see them play again, but my friend is playing in some exhibition game with them and he said I get to meet them ahhhhh sorry I know I am boring you guys, so I'll stop now, but please please please review, I love you guys!!!!
~AgentGilmore
Summary~ Future Fic; When Sydney disappears, Vaughn is determined to find her, for his sake and their son's
A/N:first of all, let me apologize for the last chapter, it really really sucked. I haven't even read the 1 review that I got for it because it sucked so much, I tried much harder on this one and hope it is better, so please please review it!!! Oh yeah, and it's longer too, so on to chapter three
*****
Vaughn buried his face in his hands and thought for a minute *This cannot be happening. How am I going to handle a kid? He's gonna hate me, I know it, he's going to think I abandoned him and Syd and he's gonna hate me for it*
Weiss sat down next to him and started eating a sandwich. Then he noticed the look on Vaughn's face "Hey man, what's wrong? You look like you just found out that you're dying" Weiss said, "Okay sorry, that was a lame attempt to make you laugh, or at least smile, obviously it didn't work, so just tell me what's up before I pull out the knock knock jokes"
Vaughn sighed "Sydney's disappeared" he whispered quietly
"Your Sydney?" Weiss asked
"God, why do you still call her that?" Vaughn asked, getting a little bit angry "And yes, my Sydney, who else would I be talking about? And Jack is on his way here with William. Jack is gonna kill me"
"Why?" Weiss asked innocently even though he knew that answer
"Well, let's count the reasons" Vaughn said sarcastically "Number one, Its my fault that Sydney quit, therefore meaning its my fault we still don't have Sloane. Number two, I broke his daughter's heart. Number three, I am an incompetent father.."he was interrupted by Weiss before he could finish
"None of that is true and you know it, every decision that was made was made by Sydney, she broke you, not the other way around" Weiss said, trying to be a supportive friend "she kept you away man, it isn't your fault"
~Flashback~
"Michael" Sydney said quietly "I can't take it anymore. It's too risky"
"Syd, I wish it wasn't, okay?, I wish it was possible for us to always be sure our son is going to be okay, and that there are no dangers in the world, but there are baby, and there's nothing we can do about it" he responded
"Vaughn, William can't grow up the way we did. He can't always wonder what daddy really does and why he's always away for work. That can't happen, and I won't let it. He's growing up Michael, and you are not here to see it, you are always away on some damn mission" Sydney said sadly, but also with a hint of anger
"Syd, I can't quit. You know I can't. I promised you I would find Sloane, and until that happens I cannot and will not quit" Vaughn whispered as to not wake the sleeping two year old in the next room
"Then just leave" Sydney said, getting choked up "Vaughn, we can't live like this. I love you so much, you know this, and I thought I would never be able to love anyone as much as I do you" she paused and looked up at him with tears in her eyes "but William, my precious baby Will, he is my life now Michael, and we can't risk it. I love both of you too much to let anything happen to you, but I think it would be best if you would leave"
"What?" Vaughn asked, obviously hurt "Syd, I am trying, I really am. And what are you going to tell Will? If I leave, like you want me to, what are you going to tell him about his father? That I abandoned him?" Vaughn asked angrily "Because I am not choosing to leave him Syd, but I know what you mean, and I hope that someday, when things a less complicated, we can make this work" he added, kissing her softly one last time before he walked into William's room, closing the door softly behind him. He looked at the little boy who slept before him, so innocent; he had no idea about all the evil of the world. Vaughn leaned over the edge of the bed and kissed him softly on the forehead "I love you buddy, and I will miss you very much and think of you every day" Vaughn said quietly, trying to memorize everything about his son, since he had no idea when he would see him again.
~End Flashback~
Vaughn was so confused. This is what he had hoped for for the last two years, wasn't it? But he didn't want it to happen this way, he wanted Sydney to realize that she was wrong and ask him to come back into their lives. But that wouldn't happen now, Sydney was gone. Possibly for good. "Eric, how the hell am I gonna do this?" Vaughn asked, hoping for some reassuring, or at least humorous words from his best friend
"I am really not the person to ask, but my suggestion is just talk to the kid, ask him questions, find out what he likes, just be his friend first, not his dad" Weiss replied
Vaughn sat there staring, surprised that what had just come out of Weiss's mouth not only made sense, but might actually work "Okay, but he just found out his mom disappeared, he's upset, and there's a chance he remembers me as the evil guy who abandoned him" Vaughn said "I just need reassurance that he's not gonna hate me"
"He won't, let me talk to him for awhile first, I'll lighten him up, getting him to stop thinking about Syd, then you can attempt to bond with him" Weiss suggested
"Bonding? I'm not sure I can handle that" Vaughn said, a smile playing on his lips
Jack's secretary walked up "Agent Vaughn? Your son and Agent Bristow are here. They would like to see you"
"Okay, thank you" Vaughn said quietly, trying to think of something to say to his son. He then quietly walked over to Jack's desk where Jack was standing with the little boy cowering behind his leg. Vaughn crouched down so he was at eye level with Will, and finally got him to make eye contact "Hi William, I'm Michael, will you come and sit with my friend while I talk to your grandpa for a minute?"
William slowly nodded his head and Vaughn grabbed the small duffle bag that Will had brought, and showed him where his desk was. He lifted Will up into his chair and set his bag down; then turned to Weiss "Watch him for a minute, will you? I need to have a word or two with Jack" Vaughn asked
"Sure man, but remember that I know exactly nothing about entertaining kids" he warned as Vaughn walked away
"Jack" Vaughn said, terrified of facing him right now, but doing it for Will's sake "Does he know?"
"Does he know what?" Jack said, his tone harsh "does he know that his mother has disappeared? Yes. Does he know why, or how, or when she's going to be back? No, and that scares him, and I have no idea what to do about it."
Vaughn couldn't believe he had just heard Jack Bristow say he didn't know what to do "Well, I'm not sure I do either, but I think it would be best if William stayed with me while we try to find Sydney" Vaughn said quietly "I wonder if I'll even remember how to act around him, he's grown so much"
"Yeah, well two years will do that to a kid. Do you think he recognized you?"
"I really don't know, he might have, but didn't really act like he did, but I think he's still pretty freaked out by Syd being gone" Vaughn answered
"Well, just take him home, let him get some sleep, maybe tell him you are his dad tomorrow. He has enough to deal with tonight. And call me if you need anything, I'll probably be here all night trying to get a search team together" Jack said
Vaughn smiled, surprised at how sympathetic Jack was being, and went back to find William and take him home
Back at Vaughn's desk, Weiss was trying to analyze William without staring at him. Mostly Vaughn, he thought. Vaughn's eyes, nose, hair, chin. Sydney's dimples though, that was obvious. Then he noticed the basketball jersey. Sport nut. Obviously Vaughn's kid, Weiss though smiling. He noticed how uncomfortable the kid looked and tried to make small talk "So, you like basketball?"
William nodded slowly, surprised that someone had talked to him. It seemed like everyone who had seen him so far looked angry, as if he was disrupting their work just by being there.
"Are you a Lakers fan?" Weiss asked, hoping he could eventually get the kid to talk since he had no idea when Vaughn would be back again
Will nodded again, smiling a little bit of a half smile this time *that is all Vaughn* Weiss thought, thinking of all the times he had seen his best friend do that, usually while around Sydney
"That's cool, you can probably go to a game with me and your." Weiss stopped himself *Does Will know? Oh well, better play it safe* "with me and Michael sometime. What other teams do ya like kid?" Weiss asked, just to get the satisfaction of making the kid answer a question actually, not just shake or nod his head.
"Duke, Kentucky, Arizona, Kansas. All the big basketball schools" Will replied, thinking that this guy might actually want to talk to him
Weiss was impressed, for a four year old kid he sure knew his sports, maybe he should quiz Will on foreign policy next. Just then Vaughn walked up
"Hey William, I just talked to your grandpa, I'm so sorry about what happened to your mom, but your grandpa and I decided that it would be best for you to stay with me rather than him, so if you're ready, I'll get your bag and we can go. I bet you are pretty tired" Vaughn said, having no idea what to say to a kid whose mother had just disappeared
William slid out of the chair with a somber look on his face, since now he was thinking about his mom's disappearance. "Bye guys" Weiss said as Vaughn grabbed his son's bag and started walking away
"Bye" Will said quietly. Over Will's head Vaughn looked at Weiss and mouthed thank you.
~~~
About thirty minutes later Vaughn finished putting sheets onto the couch and helped Will change into his pajamas. "Hey William, can you come here for a minute?" Vaughn asked as he patted the spot next to him on the couch for the little boy to sit. As Will sat down, Vaughn took a deep breath and started to talk. "Will, I know you are upset about what happened to your mom today, but I promise you, me, and your grandpa, and Weiss are going to try our hardest to find her as soon as we can"
"Is mommy dead?" Will asked, completely out of the blue
Vaughn was taken aback "umm no Will, I don't think she is, she's just missing, but I promise you we will find her"
"Can I ask another question?" the little boy asked softly
"Of course" Vaughn said, even though he wasn't as sure as he sounded
"Um, are you my daddy?" William asked, his big green eyes staring up at Vaughn
"Yeah" Vaughn answered quietly "Yeah, I am"
This being the answer William wanted and assumed he would get, she crawled into Vaughn's lap and started sobbing into his shoulder
"Shhh, it's okay buddy" Vaughn said, trying to comfort him "I promise we'll find her, I promise.."
*****
A/N: So there it is, it actually turned out okay I think, but I kind of suck @ writing flashbacks. But please review with any feedback/suggestions that you have, I was thinking about maybe having William meet Irina in an upcoming chapter hmm I dunno tho
On a mildly related, but not really note, I am what you would call an obsessed Kansas basketball fan, and I just HAD to mention it in this chapter, and it's no like we suck, so I guess it's possible some kid halfway across the country likes them right??? But anyways, after being in mourning for several weeks after the championship game, I am finally done and guess what?!?! (Okay, this is the really unrelated part) On Wednesday, I get to meet Kirk Hinrich and Nick Collison!!! I realize that this means nothing to all of you, but they are seniors this year and I was so sad cuz I was never gonna get to see them play again, but my friend is playing in some exhibition game with them and he said I get to meet them ahhhhh sorry I know I am boring you guys, so I'll stop now, but please please please review, I love you guys!!!!
~AgentGilmore
