Oregano: HEY!  OREGANO IS STILL ALIVE.  NO WORRIES.  Glad you guys enjoy this…  I am, too.  How about you, Emjai, my dear?

Emjai: always a pleasure working with you, my dear! Hey guys, sorry it took so long – partly my fault, I read it and forgot to post it. Eep. Please don't come after me with torches and pitchforks…. Enjoy!

OUTTA HERE

Chapter 4: Dilemma's and Dubbing babies

Luke wiped his sweaty palms at the side of his pants as he stiffly made his way to class.

So you… happened to lose the fact that you had a girlfriend… for a few seconds…

Minutes…

FINE, a whole Goddamn day.

So what, right?

A student bumped against his shoulder, making him look up.  It was about the same time that he realized that almost all eyes were on him.

What?  They can't know already.

"And she said she was pregnant, too!"

"Oh, God."

"Totally."

Whispers flew about the hall in a rage.  Just then Rachel came out of the washroom, and everything went silent.

Oh, God.

After giving everyone a slightly confused glance, Rachel walked over to Luke and kissed him quickly on the lips.

You could feel the entire student body hold their breath.

"What's going on?" she whispered and furrowed her brows.

Lie: You'll have a blotch in your relationship forever.

Tell the truth: You'll have a blotch in your relationship forever.

Crap.

She'll find out eventually, with the given shortest grapevine ever to be discovered that Stars Hollow seems to be famous for…

"Um, I have to talk to you in private."

He led her into an empty classroom and sat her down.  They both heard a thud and turned to the door to see all the kids crowded around the glass, straining to hear.

"Oh, my God," Rachel said, wrinkling her nose.

"Yeah… uh, Rachel?"

"Yes, Luke?"

"I have a…"

Then the bell went shrieking louder than a fire truck on speed.

"I have to go, Luke, I'll see you at lunch.  Tell me then!"  With that, Rachel gathered her books, fluffed her permed hair and ran out the door, leaving Luke with the majority of the senior class watching him.

***

Luke watched the light bounce off the spoon as he twirled it in his hand, deep in thought.

"Hey, Butch," one of his friends called as he walked over to where Luke was sitting, "Is it true that you've got a banged-up broad living in your house?"

"She's not 'banged-up'."

The boy smiled wickedly and raised his eyebrows, "She's not?  She hot?"

"Not, she's fifty-seven years old and wheezing with asthma."

His friend made a face at Luke's description of his guest and backed away.

Perfect.  I should just do this all day.  Make Lorelai sound like a complete hag and they'll probably leave me alone.  This is genius!

"Hey, Luke!" Rachel greeted as she plopped down next to him.

"Rachel!"

"So, how've you been?"

This must be a trick.  Girls always play tricks…

"Fine." he replied, a little bit too alto.

"So I heard something weird today…"

Luke raised his eyebrows, anticipating the eventual mess that was to come.

"Really?  What was that?"

"That-"

His girlfriend smirked at him and put a scoop of pudding into her mouth, making Luke squirm even more.

"FINE!  I HAVE A PREGNANT SIXTEEN YEAR-OLD LIVING WITH ME IN MY HOUSE!"

Rachel jumped as Luke yelled it right into her face.  Several kids turned to look at him as he turned all red.

"That's what ya heard, Rachel?  Well, it's true!"

"Actually, I heard that Mr. Forcanio was getting fired." Rachel said slowly, "But this sounds so much more interesting…"

Luke deflated as Rachel rested her chin on her hand quite coyly, ready to listen.

Please, kill me now.  Anybody?

Really.  Any amount of money for me to be shot in the face.

Right now.

***

Luke trudged into his house, tired and in a damn foul mood.  He dropped his bag by the door and sighed.

"Luke-a-ma-bob!"

His head shot up at Lorelai's voice.  She was leaning over the couch, wearing what seemed to be his old PE t-shirt that has grown too small for him.

"Lorelai?  You're supposed to be at Sookie's."

"Well, I was, but then she tried making me a chicken-loaf with hollandaise sauce and glazed spinach because it was a new recipe she got from her friend, and things got out of hand, burners burned a bit too much, knives were involved, and it was just a big fat party for pain and…"

Figures.

"Lorelai, skip to the part where you tell me why you're standing here in my clothes, please."

Lorelai frowned at him slightly for cutting her off, but Luke didn't really care.  He sighed and walked towards his room with Lorelai talking behind him.

"Well, she kind of hit a chair, and then the knife slipped from her hand.  She tried to catch it, but then realized, hey, it's a knife!  So she jumped back, smacked her elbow on the stove, and then she whipped around and splashed oil all over my shirt."

"So she just accidentally poured oil on you."

Lorelai raised her eyes in a thoughtful gesture, "In a nutshell, pretty much," she said softly.

Luke nodded and took his jacket off, "So, is Sookie okay?"

"Yeah, her mom took her to the hospital.  I walked here."

"You walked?!"

"Dude, how small is this town?"

"Point taken."

Luke reached into his closet and pulled out a blue flannel shirt and shrugged it on.  Grabbing his cap from his dresser, he proceeded to walk towards the door, still with Lorelai at his heels.

"So, where you headed?" she asked innocently.

Don't do it, Luke.  She'll just be trouble and you know it.

"I'm going to the store to work."

Danger-danger!

"Really?"

Step away from the girl, sir.

Sir?

"You want to come?"

BACKUP!  I need backup!

***

But it didn't seem to be that bad, having Lorelai around.

Just damn quiet and awkward and boring.  Where's that big-ass elephant when you want it?!

William's Hardware was silent as all three of them sat behind a long counter.  Mr. Danes was checking inventory in his logbook, Luke was staring off into space, and Lorelai was left to play with a cup of paint and a stick.

"BELINDA!"  she screamed suddenly, making Mr. Danes rip a hole into his book with his pencil and causing Luke to jolt up and fall off his chair.

Christ!

"What?"

"I'm going to name my baby Belinda!  As in Carisle!  Because you know, heaven IS a place on earth, my friends."  Lorelai nodded.

"You're going to name your kid after a singer?" Luke asked doubtfully.

So glad that I wasn't named Boy.  Or George.

"If you're going to name it after someone, name it after someone special, Lorelai." Mr. Danes said softly.

Ugh, Dad and his JRR Tolkien likeness…

Lorelai thought for a moment, tapping the stick against her chin.

Luke rolled his eyes as more and more paint splattered onto her face.  He reached her wrist and pried the stick away.

"You sure it's a girl?" he asked gruffly as he went around the counter to grab a box of tissues.

"Positive.  We're so connected.  Like Rainbow Bright and her pony.  But I'm not Rainbow Bright.  And she's not a pony." Lorelai looked down to her stomach and gently rubbed it.

"Delia." he suggested as he threw the box at her.

"No.  It's like Delia Harsworth.  She's such a bitch at school…"  Lorelai caught it and set it down, completely ignoring the paint splotch on her face.

"Christie."

"Too common.  I want to be unique.  Just like everyone else," Lorelai stated, making Mr. Danes chuckle at her joke in the end.

"Farrah."

"Ew."

"Sabrina."

"Dude, are you stuck in the past or something?  It's 1985!  Bring it up a few decades, will ya?  I want her name to be special.  And unique.  Like mine: Lorelai."  She spread her hands over an invisible poster in the air as she said her own name.

"Lorelai," Mr. Danes said.

"Yeah?"

"No, Lorelai."

"That's my name, don't wear it out…" she replied, very confused.

"Call her Lorelai."

Huh.

The three of them sat in silence again, contemplating the suggestion.

"Lorelai… Belinda?"

"Lorelai Leigh," Luke said without thinking.  His eyes were focused on Lorelai's chin which was now completely blue.  He shot down the urge to wipe it off.

Just wanted it off.

Not because I'd like to touch her.  No way.

I'm just… obsessive compulsive.

That's it.

She smiled at Luke, "I like it."

Luke felt himself redden and quickly looked away.

"So, how's Rachel doing, Luke?" Mr. Danes asked, a slight chuckle tracing his features.

Huh?

Rachel?

DAMMIT!