Disclaimer: Roses are red Violets are blue I don't own So please don't sue

Roses are red Violets are blue If you sue me I'll sue you

All belongs to JK Rowling, except the plot, geniusly thought of by me and Wizened Wizards Wizzing Butter, also belonging 2 me.

A/N: yes, I am completely INSANE!! (and I like buttered toast) , I know this would never happen, so don't tell me off for that please, and I'm not sure if they have spray butter in England, so don't flame me for that either. And don't tell me I don't know what "ghetto" means, because its Dumbledore who doesn't.Have a nice day ~ Jelly

Sprayable Butter

Harry, Ron and Hermione made they're way down to the Great Hall for breakfast, "I have the sudden urge for some toast and jam," said Hermione in a very un- Hermioneish way

"No, toast with marmalade," replied Ron

"BETTER! TOAST WITH.BUTTER!!!!!" yelled Harry.

And with that proposal they ran down the hallways towards the Great Hall, not running for the sheer pleasure of toast, but because Peeves was pelting paper clips at them with an ingenious contraption, which Filch liked to call, "the incredible annoyance machine".

Once at the Gryffindor table they saw a sight that shocked them..

" WHERE IS THE BUTTER?!?!?" yelled Ron,

"I decided to switch to something more uhhh, `coolio,' or uhh whatever you kids are saying nowadays" said Professor Dumbledore gesturing to a yellow bottle with a spray top and a label reading "Wizened Wizards Wizzing Butter, liquid butter with a sprayable top (100% artificial)"

" HOW COULD YOU EXCHANGE THE CREAMY PURE GOODNESS OF BUTTER FOR SOMETHING ARTIFICIAL?!?!?" yelled Seamus Finnigan angrily.

"Simply, Mr.Finnigan, I called up the stick butter company told them Hogwarts would like to cancel they're butter blocks that come weekly coming, the called up Wizened Wizards Wizzing Butter and said I would like to order enough spray butter to last the year" replied Dumbledore calmly, before walking away.

"WE MUST STAGE A PROTEST!" yelled Hermione, but she was too late, all of Hogwarts was already spraying their toast with Wizzing Butter.

Hermione sighed and sat down next to Ron and Harry who had already stuffed their faces with toast that was leaking liquid butter

"Woo know er mione dis is bretty good!" said Ron through his 50th mouthful of toast, "try some."

And with that, Hermione took a piece of toast off the toast rack, and sprayed it with butter and ate her first taste of the smooth buttery goodness or spray butter.

"You know, I think we could use this to fight evil," said Harry randomly,

"How so?" said Ron inquisitively,

"Like this, MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHA," yelled Harry maniacally running towards the Slytherin table and spraying Draco Malfoy in the eyes with butter, who yelled a high pitch scream much like thus,"AGGHHAGGHAGHAGGHAGHAGHAGHAGHHHHHHHHHHHHH" inducing the whole Great Hall to laughter.

All of the sudden Dean Thomas stood up and yelled, " BUTTER FIGHT, EVERY PERSON FOR THEMSELVES!!!!!!!!" and with that ingenious proposal everyone sprayed everyone else with butter, and all was well. And Hogwarts learned to enjoy Sprayable Butter.

A/N: Weird aren't I?