Have You Ever

Written By, Jayde Amethyst

"Close your eyes, and you'll find me."

Copyright: 'Kingdom Hearts' belongs to Disney and Squaresoft.

            'Have You Ever' is written by Diane Warren and sung by Brandy.

            The story 'Have You Ever' based on Brandy's song belongs to me.

            All rights reserved under penalty of law.

Beginning Author's Note: The story in question originated out of an idea I had while reading Snowri Leonhart's 'Intuition' as well as her other many well-written songfics. It took a while for me to find a suitable song that fit the pairing of Squall and Yuffie, but I finally did, and if you ask me, I couldn't find a better one. So, I give thanks for the idea to write a songfic to Miss Snowri.

            Also, this is written in Yuffie's point of view all the way. Hopefully, I won't mess this one up. ^_^

 

~*~

Have you ever loved somebody so much,

It makes you cry.

Have you ever needed something so bad,

You can't sleep at night.

I had to admit…it took me a while to realize I had feelings for him. Since the first time I had met him, I knew there was something inside of me that felt something for him. And then one day, it hit me like – excuse the cliché – a ton of bricks: I was in love with him.

But he's no ordinary man. He's not going to jump with glee when I say, "Oh, just to let you know, I'm in love with you." He's not going to immediately start planning our wedding, or tell me he feels the same. Because I know he doesn't feel the same. I know he could probably care less about my feelings, thinking I'm just a silly little brat with a crush.

He's a rock. I can almost swear it. A living, breathing rock. He has perfectly chiseled features, hard, cold eyes, and the heart that could match that of the Grim Reaper's. He could possibly care about no one but himself, but I've never really found out why he stays with us, or insists we all call him 'Leon' instead of his birth-given name, 'Squall'.

Have you ever tried to find the words,

But they don't come out right.

Have you ever…have you ever…

I've tried numerous occasions to see if he has a heart at all. But my attempts always fail, either with us getting into a fight, interruption, or because he just doesn't want to answer. Possibly, the only person who knows I love him is Aerith, unless she's already told Cloud.

They make such a perfect couple, Cloud and Aerith. Aerith and Cloud. That's how I wish for Squall and me to be like. Squall and Yuffie, Yuffie and Squall.

Have you ever been in love,

Been in love so bad,

You'd do anything to make them understand.

Have you ever had someone steal your heart away,

You'd give anything to make them feel the same.

But of course, he doesn't feel the same. He'll never feel the same way I do. I'm four years younger than him, for heaven's sake! I'm a little girl to him no matter what I do to prove that I love him. I'm sure he sees the signs; he's just ignoring them, the way he ignores me. He hardly acknowledges my existence, and the only time he probably really notices me is when we train, and he's shouting out what I'm doing wrong and what I need to do to make it right; but with his constant nagging, I can never get anything right.

Have you ever searched for the words to get you in their heart,

But you don't know what to say,

And you don't know where to start.

After reminiscing on my feelings, I slowly rose from my bed, moving toward the small balcony. It's been one year and six months exactly since Sora sealed Hollow Bastion, allowing Squall, Aerith, Cloud, and myself as well as our mechanic, Cid, to come back. But that doesn't mean life would go back to normal when we returned. Life was never the same as before. Our beloved castle was in a shambles, and even to this day, we still haven't managed to fix every room.

But that's not the point of what I'm trying to say. I slowly walked out onto the balcony, gazing up at the starlit sky. A light breeze swept by, calming my nerves slightly. Though the castle wasn't in tiptop shape, the grounds were absolutely beautiful, due to Aerith's constant gardening and caring of them. I sat upon the railing of the concrete balcony, smiling a peaceful smile as I thought of him. I love him, I thought. No matter what he does, I love him.

Have you ever loved somebody so much,

It makes you cry.

Have you ever needed something so bad,

You can't sleep at night.

My eyes downcast, sweeping the gardens below and all around. In the distance, I spotted the faint sparkle of the Rising Falls, one of my favorite places to train and hang out with Squall or Aerith.

Squall… Why can't I get his name out of my head? God…I love you so much, Squall. Why can't you see? A small crystal tear snaked its way down my cheek, highlighted by the pale moonlight. I quickly wiped it away, hoping no one would see.

Have you ever tried to find the words,

But they don't come out right.

Have you ever…have you ever…

Another one followed the last…and another followed that…soon a river was falling from my eyes as I sobbed slowly, quietly, shaking so violently I might've fallen had two strong arms not snaked themselves around me. I looked up into ice blue eyes, my own emerald ones getting lost in them as soon as they made contact.

"What's wrong, Yuffie?" The strong timbre in Squall's voice made me melt in his arms, but I held fast to my composure – which was currently quickly slipping away, along with the many tears.

"Nothing," I forced out, trying hopelessly to keep my voice calm.

Have you ever found the one

You've dreamed of all your life,

You'd do anything to look into their eyes.

Have you finally found the one you've given your heart to,

Only to find that one won't give their heart to you.

Have you ever closed your eyes and

Dreamed that they were there,

And all you can do is wait for the day when they will care.

It wasn't working; my voice was breaking and the tears wouldn't stop. Who ever thought I, Yuffie Kisaragi, the World's Greatest Female Ninja Ever, would begin crying over a man…a guy…the love of my life.

"Yuffie," whispered Squall slowly. "Come inside." I didn't answer, but I let him bring me in anyway. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing," I repeated, pushing him and away and trying to stand. This was too much. This wasn't me. Why was I crying? Oh yeah, I thought bitterly, trying desperately to stop the tears. Because he'll never love me back.

"Get a grip, girl," I whispered to myself. "Just stand strong. You can get through this." I pasted a smile on my face and turned to the man behind me. "Thank you, Squ-…er…Leon. I'll see you in the morning." I turned away and got back into bed, burying me head in the pillow.

Have you ever loved somebody so much,

It makes you cry.

Have you ever needed something so bad,

You can't sleep at night.

Have you ever tried to find the words,

But they don't come out right.

Have you ever…have you ever…

"Yuffie…" I could tell he was getting aggravated with me for not answering him. I could just imagine him thinking to himself, 'She's such a brat…why won't she answer?' Yeah right. What am I thinking?

"Go away, Leon. I just want to sleep, please." A long moment passed. When I turned over, looking to see if he was still there, I found that he hadn't listened to me.

"Why were you crying?" he asked. I sighed, on the verge of telling him everything.

"Nothing, really," I lied. "I just had a nightmare about my…er…parents." Looking unconvinced, Squall nodded, standing.

"You're lucky I was there to catch your fall." I looked at him, confused. And I could have sworn I saw a smile. Or a smirk.

What do I gotta do to get you in my arms baby?

What do I gotta say to get to your heart?

To make you understand how I need you next to me…

I've gotta get you in my world,

'Cause baby, I can't sleep.

Then he turned and left. I sighed, turning over. I shook my head. "What are you thinking, Yuffie?" I sighed again, dragging it out. If I forever stay moping about him, I'll never be able to tell him. So what am I supposed to say? I laughed out loud at this thought. 'Oh Squall, just to let you know, I'm in love with you. So…what're you doing?' Yeah, imagine how stupid that'll sound. 'Squall…I mean, Leon…I'm in love with you, okay? Bye now!' How disturbing…

Have you ever loved somebody so much,

It makes you cry.

Have you ever needed something so bad,

You can't sleep at night.

Have you ever tried to find the words,

But they don't come out right.

Maybe one day I'll find out…maybe one day…

Have you ever…have you ever…

~*~

Ending Author's Note: Sorry I seemed to put Yuffie a bit out of character…but it was my first try at a real songfic…Heh! ^.^ Please review, and thank you!