"Dark Xeron Campaign" Operation Cows of War

Dark Xeron sat in his seat on the plane and thought about the mission he was about to take part in. Looking around he could see the dog and cat he found in an earlier, sleeping on the planes floor. Then he looked over at the small group of men that he was given to help him in his mission. He saw one of the men staring at him. He looked kind of small, he didn't really seem very strong. Wondering why the man was staring at him he decided to ask him a question.
"What are you staring at?" he asked him.
"Oh nothing sir, I was just thinking about the mission. This is my first one you know. Kfc21 is a great leader and everything, but it just seems that he makes some weird decisions. Like choosing me, I have know idea why," the man explained to him.
"What's your name?"
"Well, it's.um.Matthew, But every one calls me RSEagle."
I'll tell you what. For now on I'll call you RSEagle, unless you would like me to keep to your other name."
"No really, it's ok, you can call me that."
"All right, RSEagle it is."
After his short conversation with RSEagle he felt like taking a little rest before they arrived. He was about to fall asleep when he was asked a question.
"Ah sir, if you don't mind me asking, but why are you bringing your pets along?"
"Because RSEagle, these animals helped me out in a mission I was in. From then on I decided to take them with me on all my missions."
"Oh ok, but what makes them so special?"
"You will find out sooner or later."
"Ok sir, sorry for disturbing you."
A few hours later Dark Xeron was woken up by the sound of people talking. He sat up and rubbed his eyes. Looking around he saw his men and pets getting ready to jump out of the airplane. Just then someone sat down next to him and tapped him on the shoulder.
Looking to his side he saw Kfc21, "what are you doing here?"
"I was on the plane from the beginning"
"You were?"
"Um yes.I was, you didn't know that?"
"Well, I guess not. What do you want anyway?"
"It's time to start your mission."
A few minutes later everyone had gotten their things together and were ready to make the jump. The first to jump were the three soldier he was in charge of, followed by the dog and cat. It was now Dark Xeron's turn. He stared down at the ground far bellow. Without knowing Kfc21 pushed him out of the plane yelling "good luck". He saw the others pull open their parachutes and begin to float down toward the ground. When it was time for him to pull open his, he a reached for the cord and pulled, but it failed. He then pulled the emergency one, but that failed too. He then began to scream like a little girl again. Then he remembered something Kfc21 said. "Why don't you try the fish" he heard himself saying. With this he reached for the robot fish he had strapped to his side. Managing to get it off his belt he told it to float. But nothing happened, he tried again and again, still nothing happened. He closed his eyes and waited to die. A little later he was still alive. He opened his eyes and found himself floating two feet off the round. He didn't realize it but he was still holding onto the fish.
"You just going to float there all day?"
"Wha..?" He said looking up and saw the dog was looking at him. "Oh no I was just.um.never mind.
"Good let's just get to the mission."
"Where are we anyway"
"Do you ever listen to the briefings."
"Yes!"
"Ok then, now just get down from there and lets go."
After traveling for a little while through a patch of trees they could finally see the base they needed to get to. But there was one problem, a field of cows were blocking their way.
"I'm not going out there," one soldier said.
"And why not?!" Dark Xeron said.
"There's cow poop out there."
"Cow poop.cow poop.YOUR WORRIED ABOUT COW POOP!!!!!!!"
"Um yes, I like to keep my shoes clean and tidy."
"Come here, what's your name again?"
"Uh, Jerry sir"
"Well Jerry, you know what I say?"
"What sir?"
"YOUR GOING TO STEP IN COW POOP AND LIKE IT!!!!!!!! DO YOU HEAR ME??!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
"Yes sir.(sniff)"
"Good, now let's go."
They snuck around each cow trying not to get caught by anyone. But this soon failed when a farmer warring an extremely large hat that covered his face with its shadow came down the field with a cow.
"Get ready to do something," Dark Xeron whispered.
As the farmer approached he called out at them, "hey guys hows the progress?"
"Who is this guy? Hey farmer what are you doing, why are you here?!"
"Just checking up on you guys."
"Checking up on us? Wait a minute," he walked over to the farmer and pulled off his hat.
"Commander, what are you doing here?" RSEagle asked.
"Well, I am here to give you all..drum roll please..COW COSTUMES!!!" Kfc21 announced to all of them.
"...................what?" someone finally asked.
"I have the costumes here so you can sneak in..like cows."
"All right sir.we'll make good use of these."
"Good, I think you'll need them.
Kfc21 then put back on his hat and walked off. The rest of the group put on the cow costumes but left the dog out to make it seem like he was herding them. They all managed to get up to the entrance of the base where a few guards were standing. They then got up to the door and a guard opened the it.
"Bark bark, I'm herding cows, bark bark," the dog said as he passed the guards.
"Aaahh good doggy, look at him bring those cows in for us," the guard said.
They got all the way into the base when they felt a rush of cold air and then followed by the thud of a door and complete darkness. This was followed by the complaining of one soldier. "It feels cold in here, and I can't see anything, can we take this cow costume off."
"Shut up! Darn, I knew I should have taken the right door. It's just that I like big shiny metal doors.he he," Dark Xeron said.
"Wait how do we get out of here?" RSEagle asked.
"That's a good question. Maybe the fish can do something," the dog answered.
"Well then let me see here. Oh got it! Ok fish get us out of here," Dark Xeron said as he held the fish up.
The fish floated over the door, even though no one could see where it was. But there soon was a faint amount of light coming from a laser shooting out of the fish. It then began to melt the door hinges. With a loud thud the large steel door fell to the ground.
"Yeah, we're free! Can we take these cow costumes off now?" a soldier said.
"Um I guess, Kfc21 didn't say how long we needed them, but give them to me and I'll put them in my pack," said Dark Xeron. "To the other door we go!"
Dark Xeron's group traveled on down several halls, only running into the occasional cow, until they made it to a dead end. It was a room containing three other doors. "All right which door is it, door #1, door #2, or door #3."
"I was never good at multiple choice, um.I guess..hhhmmmm.#2!"
"Ok #2 it is!"
They all scrambled through the middle door and ran down another hall. But there was one problem, someone was coming their way. (What happened next is something that I the writer didn't expect Dark Xeron to do). He ran strait toward who ever was coming. Then expecting to tackle a man he instead tripped over a dog. As he laid on the floor he looked back to see a large husky baring its teeth and growling at him. With a quick scream he got up and ran for his life, the dog then followed closely behind him. After a small pause to get themselves back together Dark Xeron's men then too ran after him. They followed him down many twists and turns and went from room to room.
Why was the dog following him? Did it want something, or maybe it's because he tripped over it? He had no idea and kept thinking this until the cow costume he had with him started to fall out of his pack.
That was it! If he could just get on the cow costume maybe the dog would run by thinking he was nothing but a small skinny lumpy cow. He quickly turned the next corner but it only gave him a few seconds to put the costume on. He put it on as fast as he could, this didn't help much because now he looked like a misshapen cow. But somehow it still worked, the dog ran by him without even glancing his way. With over he began to take off the cow costume, as put it in his pack a voice popped into his head saying "I will find you", this gave him the creeps.
Just then RSEagle came up to him, he was still trying to catch his breathe, "Hey Dark Xeron.why.was.that dog.chasing.you?"
"Oh nothing to worry about, I guess he was angry that I tripped over him," Dark Xeron quickly replied trying to forget that voice he heard in his head.
In a few seconds they were all back together and traveling through the base. Then they realized they had a problem. What was their mission to begin with? They had been walking through out endless hallways, passing and looking in many doors, but they didn't know what they were doing there.
"Ok this is stupid, why are we here anyway?" said the dog.
"You know that is a good question, I can't remember what Kfc21 said, maybe it was..hhhmmm.Hey look it's a big shiny door!" Dark Xeron said as he noticed a large metal door at what seemed to be the end of the hallway. "Let's see what's in it."
"No Dark Xeron no! Don't go in there..," it was too late. Dark Xeron went inside and somehow got all of them in there with him. The door then locked behind them, they were now trapped in a small room again, except for the fact that it was warmer and had lighting.
"You did it again you cheese head! Where is that fish of yours?!" the dog yelled at him. He then quickly bit Dark Xeron on the hand.
"OW! What was that for? Wait, don't answer that. Hold on I'll get the fish out." But before he could the room began to fill with gas.
"Aaahhh smoke! I don't like smoke.and...I..um..zzzzzzzz......" One of the soldiers said before they all blanked out.

Dark Xeron woke to a sharp pain in his head, one that felt like a brick landed on him. Opening his eyes he could see something hairy staring at him, he then could smell the sent of a dog's breathe. He rubbed his eyes to see a border collie looking right in his eyes.
"Do you know how stupid you really are? We're now trapped in a prison cell with no way out, our weapons are missing, and the fish is somehow not able to work. What do you have to say now?" said the dog.
"Um could you get your nose out of my face?" He replied still tired.
"How are we going to get out of here?" asked RSEagle.
"I have no idea. I guess I really screwed up this time, huh," said Dark Xeron.
"Well I wouldn't say that, wait no your right," said the dog. Just then the bars opened to their cell.
"What the heck just happened?"
"I'm not sure. Or maybe, oh yes I see."
"What was it?"
"The cat used it's powers to open the lock. He just woke up I guess."
"Well then why don't we just get out of here."
"I don't see why we can't. Ok on we go!"
They all scrambled out of the cell. Luckily there was no one around to see them. As they passed the door one of them spotted and M-16 laying against the wall. So he picked it hoping it could be of some use to them later. But that was a mistake for it caused the alarm to go. They all panicked and ran out of a near by door as fast as they could. They then found themselves standing on a runway outside the Soviet base.
"How are we going to get out of this now?" said one soldier as he noticed a group of conscripts coming at them.
"Well, we can't go that way so why don't we got this way. Oops not that way, tesla coils," said Dark Xeron just too noticing their situation.
"Ok I want to know why this base is built they way it is. Endless hallways, prisons without guards and right next to an airstrip. This is stupid," said RSEagle.
"Hey you there, use that gun to hold them off as we get in one of those tanks that stupidly parked over there," yelled Dark Xeron over to one of the soldiers. "Sure thing," the soldier replied.
As one of the soldiers fired off his gun the rest of them jumped into a conveniently placed Soviet rhino tank. Once inside Dark Xeron looked around to find the controls.
"Ah, I can't find the controls, where are they where are they?!" said Dark Xeron as he looked around.
"There over here stupid, and if it's ok with you I'll do the driving," came the dog's voice from the tank's driving seat.
"Um I guess you could. Do you even know how to?"
"Yes I do, so can you please just shut up, you and the others man the gun and stuff."
"Ok we'll do that."
The tank roared to life and drove out onto the runway. With a few blasts from it's cannon they were able to chase the conscripts off. They drove up and picked up the one other soldier and continued down the runway. Just as they were going past the hangers filled with Soviet MiG fighters, they were attacked by aircraft above.
"Hey dog, do you know how to fly one of those?" Dark Xeron said as he looked at one of the MiGs in the hangers.
"Uh yes, why?" the dog said.
"Well, could you quickly run to one of those over there and fly it. Then get rid of those other pesky planes."
"Sure, I think I could do that, but who will drive the tank?"
"Don't worry about that. Now after you do that, land the jet on that abandoned freeway in front of my house."
"What?!"
"Just do it please."
"Fine, but you better not get me killed."
"The cat will come with you too, just to give you some cover."
"What is an abandoned freeway doing in front of your house anyway?"
"Never mind that just go." The dog and the cat dragged themselves out of the tank's hatch. In a few minutes the MiG was out of it's hanger and up in the air. "Uh sir, how are we going to get back?" said RSEagle. "Don't worry, I just need to know if the fish is working now. If he is then we're all set. Then we can OOOWWWW! What was that?" Dark Xeron said as he turned to see the fish floating behind him. "Stop doing that whenever I ask for you!" "Um sir, how is a floating fish supposed to get us home?" "This little guy can carry as much wait as he wants and still travel at high speed." "...what?" "Never mind, just help me get some cables hooked to this tank and the fish." After everything was ready, Dark Xeron gave the signal and the tank lifted off the ground. In a few seconds the tank was moving at almost the speed of a jet. They zoomed away from the Soviet base and flew off toward a very angry commander.

To Be Continued..