Chapter Two: Too Hard to Say Good-bye


"Good Morning, Mr. Angel," the woman at the front desk of Wolfram and Heart greeted him.

"Uh hey," he said. He'd have to get used to the formality. He entered the elevator and pressed the button to get to his office floor. He walked out of the elevator, around the corner and nearly collided with Fred.

"Oh Angel! I didn't see you," Fred said in her little nervous voice. She was carrying a thick book and looked excited.

"What are you up to today?" Angel asked.

Fred shifted the book in her arms. "Oh, well the scientists were showing me how the equations that were used to develop television can be used to numb the brain and turn a person into a drone," her eyes lit up but she giggled when she saw Angel's amused look on his face. "It's just for future reference and protection, of course."

"Of course," Angel said. "I'll see you later, Fred."

Fred tried to wave without dropping her book. "Angel?" she said and he turned back around. She looked down at her shoes then back at Angel. "I was going to go see how Cordy was doing after I dropped off this book to Wesley. Do you wanna come?" She winced as she saw the pain in his eyes.

Angel cleared his throat and shook her head. "I'll see her later."

"Okay, it's just that I've been there everyday and I checked the visitor list and you haven't... gone at all," Fred pointed out.

Angel set his jaw the way he did when he got angry, "I'll see her later. 'Bye Fred," he turned on his heel and walked away.

" 'Bye, Angel," she said as she watched him go down the hallway, his black jacket flapping behind him.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*


Buffy helped Faith get Robin into the first seat of the bus. They were at the airport, saying tearful good-byes to each other. The girls had called their parents who wired them money. Kennedy fronted the money for the girls whose parents didn't Western Union them money. Buffy hugged each new slayer and wished her well. To her surprise, Rona had squeezed her hard. And Vi practically flung herself at Buffy. Dawn said good-bye to the girls she had become close to, getting addresses and giving promises to write. Willow and Kennedy held each other as they said their good-byes.

"I'll be back soon," Kennedy reassured her girlfriend.

"I know, it's just... Do you have to go?" Willow asked. "I mean, you don't even like your parents. I don't like mine."

Kennedy smiled. "I know, but with everything that's gone down, I think they deserve to see me for a little while."

Willow touched her forehead against Kennedy's, pouty she said, "Well, all right."

"That's my goddess," Kennedy kissed Willow softly. "I'll see you soon." Willow nodded, smiling sadly. "Call me," Kennedy mouthed.

"Everyday," Willow said.

"Well, is everyone ready?" Xander asked as soon as Willow climbed into the bus.

Buffy looked around at the occupants of the bus. Faith sat across from Robin, who sat behind Xander, who was driving. Dawn and Willow sat together and Andrew looking over behind them. Giles was behind Buffy and she nodded as he put his hand on her shoulder for a brief moment then went back to reading his paper. "Let's Go," she said and he started the ignition.

*#*#*#*#*#*#*#*#*#*


Buffy fell asleep on the bus and woke up to night. Giles was now driving. She guessed Xander and him had switched, since Xander had a harder time driving in the dark because he had only one eye. Robin was asleep but Faith wasn't. Buffy got up and sat next to Faith.

"Hey," she said.

"Hey, B," Faith said using her nickname for Buffy.

"How is he?" She asked looking over at Robin.

Faith shrugged, "He said he's been better. I guess we should really check him into a hospital when we get to L.A. Huh?"

"Yeah," Buffy nodded. "I think you should lay low, you know? The whole fugitive persona might be hard to shake."

"I thought about turning myself in B," Faith said after a few minutes.

Buffy stared at Faith in shock. "Wha- why?"

Faith ran her hands through her hair. "Cool it, man. I said I thought about it, Robin actually talked me out of it. I think that apocalypse really made me think. I mean, really think. All my life I've been nothing more than a bad seed. A firecracker." Faith smirked, remembering how the Mayor, her 'father figure', had called her that. "I was always the one who would do the crazy stunt first. I slept around a lot. That kind of deal. But after I was activated and started slaying with you, I found something I was good at. Don't get me wrong, I was good before, if you know what I mean," Faith smiled slyly. Buffy burst out laughing and they both laughed until a stern look from Giles quieted them.

"Angel helped me out, some." Buffy stiffened at the mention of Angel's name. Faith grinned and put her arm around the blond slayer, "Don't worry, B, nothing happened."

Buffy rolled her eyes as Faith continued. "Prison does change you though, for better or for worse, it changes you. And then seeing you again, you're the only who has any idea what I'm going through, 'cause you're there too. It felt so good to be fighting with you again. I'm not the Dark Slayer anymore," Faith stopped to look at Robin who had groaned just slightly in his sleep.

Buffy saw that sudden change in Faith. She was concerned about Robin. "So, you and Robin, huh?"

"That obvious?"

"Yeah."

"You know, B, I thought he was going to be like all the rest, ride 'em and dump 'em. But ah, I dunno. He's different," Faith said looking at the former principal. "He's, heh, surprising."

"I'm glad Faith," Buffy said sincerely. "You deserve it. Happiness."

Faith nudged Buffy, "Aw, B, you're making me all warm and fuzzy. You'll find some happiness too, again."

"Thanks, Faith." Buffy saw Robin shift and grown again. Faith was at his side in a flash. Buffy smiled, and Faith saw Buffy's wistful look.

"You gonna be okay?"

"Five by five," Buffy said getting an eye roll from Faith.

*#*#*#*#*#*#*#*#*#*#*#*


Xander sat staring out the window of the bus into the California desert, into the night. He didn't feel like driving anymore. He was completely capable, despite his new handicap, but he just couldn't do it anymore. It was weird, he hadn't really been able to grieve for Anya since their wild escape from the crumbling Sunnydale. Something had reminded him of her. It might have been the smell of the air, might've been when Dawn flipped on the radio and Olivia Newton-John's "I Honestly Love You", came on. Anya had been dead set on that song being their first dance at their wedding. Or it might have been the billboard for Trojan brand condoms. Anya liked the ribbed.

Xander hung his head down. He was far enough away from his friends so they wouldn't see him cry. He sniffled and wiped his eye with his hand. "C'mon Harris," he said to himself. "You're supposed to be the strong one now."

"Why?" Andrew's annoying voice startled Xander.

"Jeez, Andrew. You scared me," Xander said jumping.

The small framed, blond haired, kid settled his chin on the seat in front of Xander's. "Well, since the First is gone, it's only fitting that I am the last remaining form of evil."

"You are not evil. I'm more afraid of Scary Veiny Willow and Faith. Even Giles is more sinister than you've ever been," Xander pointed out.

Andrew thought, "True." He conceded. "But why did you say you're supposed to be the strong one? Buffy's still the slayer."

"I know," Xander said, "It's just that, I'm usually the backbone, the doormat, I'm the one who everyone relies on because I'm the human."

Andrew wrinkled his forehead, puzzled. "We're all human."

"I know, God, just, listen. After every time we've battled a gigantic Big Bad, I'm bring the morale. I'm Morale Guy. I try to make everything better with funny jokes and thoughtful gestures. It's what I do." Xander explained.

"Oh," Andrew said. "But now you can't 'cause your Jean Grey Phoenixed out on you and sacrificed herself for the greater good."

"No, that would be Spike. Anya died saving your pathetic hide," Xander said clearly bitter.

Andrew looked down hurt. Xander resisted the urge to look at him but pity made him. "Andrew, look, I'm sorry I said that."

"No, no it's true," Andrew said. "I've been thinking about it too. Anya and I became friends, and I finally had a friendship that didn't end in a flaying or a stabbing. We went in to the fight, both scared and both sure we would die. I was so sure I wasn't going to make it. She told me to watch out, then one of the Bringer guys sliced her. I couldn't get to her, to be with her in her last moments," Andrew's voice cracked and his tears were already running down his cheeks. Xander's own eye was pretty close to spilling over too. "But," Andrew continued. He didn't know if this was helping Xander any, but it was giving him a sense of closure. "I know what her last thoughts were. She sent them to me. She said, 'Andrew, if you make it out of this, tell Xander, that I love him. That he taught me how to love again. Tell him that I... Love... Him.' Then that was it."

Xander wiped his face with his shirt. "Thanks Andrew, that was a nice story. Heart-wrenching and gut ripping, but a good story."

"It's true, Xander," Andrew protested.

Xander got up. "Yeah. I know," He said leaving a teary-eyed Andrew in the back of the bus

#*#*#*#*#*#*#*#

"So, how much longer till we get to L.A?" Xander asked when he got to the front of the bus and rejoined his friends.

"I saw a sign like, 5 miles back. It said Los Angeles 30 miles," Dawn quipped.

Giles nodded. "Yes. The lights from the city are over there," he pointed out the glow not far in the distance.

Willow looked over at Buffy. She had this sad, but satisfied expression of her face since they'd left the Sunnydale crater. ^You okay?^ Willow asked Buffy telepathically.

^Yeah^, Buffy replied. ^Tired. Real tired.^

^Excited about seeing Angel?^

Buffy smiled, ^A little.^

Willow wanted to ask how she was coping with Spike's uh, death. But she didn't want to pour salt on that wound. ^I love you, Buffy,^ was all she could think of saying.

Buffy looked over at Willow, both had small smiles on their faces. ^I love you too, Willow,^ Buffy said back.

^Aw, I love you guys, too,^ Xander said too both of them. They all smiled at each other. Buffy looked out the window, to the city. She couldn't do it yet, she couldn't say good bye to Spike just yet. Not yet.


So... that's the second chapter. I'm basically just focusing on their feelings right now. Don't worry, Spike is coming. And the Buffy/Angel/Spike triangle will go on.