Exclusive Interviews by Shuuichi Minamino

Notes and Disclaimers: Oh, look! This fanfic is still alive after all! ^^; Hunter X Hunter and Yu Yu Hakusho are both owned by Mr. Yoshihiro Togashi. Though the content of these interviews are based on the anime, not all reflect the truth. There are times when the characters will be twisted. Beware of possible spoilers from time to time.

YYH Characters / Terminologies mentioned:
Shuuichi Minamino / Kurama -
see chapter 1.
Koenma Daioh - see chapter 1.
Botan - Koenma's assistant as far as the Reikai Tantei are concerned. She is usually called the "Deity of Death", but her personality gravely go against her title. She's bubbly and cheerful, a bit of a ditz sometimes, but that also adds to her appeal ^_______^

Dedication: To Sammi-chan. Thank you so much for your support. Oh yeah, and thanks for that Gon and Killua fighting suggestion, I already thought of something to write ^_____^ I wish you lots of luck with your own fanfics ^.^

Episode 4 - Kurapika

"This is stupid."

An attractive young male in about his early 20's stood by the hospital counter in the fifth floor, his posture still and dignified. He had short, chocolate-colored hair, and a pale but healthy complexion. He wore a red bandanna that covered most of his forehead. Strangely, he had what looked like a blue pacifier on his mouth, but it didn't seem at all weird to him, for he merely scowled and glared at everyone who stared at him.

"Look. I don't know about you, Koenma, but I am not immortal. I have two choices. Either I get this interview over with, which is the best choice if you ask me, or face the wrath of a million fans. Two choices come down if I pick the second option. Either I die, or a million civilians die in my place."

"Okay, so Botan gets extra work. Now can we go?" The impatient Reikai prince tapped his foot on the ground, his movements all but pointing at the inviting elevator. He really did want to leave the hospital. He couldn't remember how Kurama even dragged him into it. Something about the show, and fans chasing them to the ends of the Earth if the fourth interview won't come out well.

After the third interview, it was reported in the news that three unknown figures have fallen from the top of the Reikai Studios building and landed on a tree standing innocently on the sidewalk. The three were unidentified, because apparently one of them had grown deranged and, with flashy red eyes to boot, destroyed all cameras, films, and tapes with a long, snake-like chain. During the commotion, the two younger ones had pulled their furious companion away, never to be seen again.

Personally, Koenma thought that they could move the fifth interview, and just shift the fourth interview to a later place. That Hisoka guy seemed okay with the plan, but it was also he who told them about the possible problem about the fans. Something about the guy scared the socks off the Reikai Prince - though he wouldn't admit that of course. He could've sworn that the guy was from Makai, but he didn't have much time to scan through his records. But nevertheless, he decided that maybe it would be better if he did take in the fourth interview first after all. More time to...er, look for more interesting characters. He seriously doubted he could take away that weird magician for the fifth interview, but who knows, right?

"Yes, I can just see it. The Kurama, ranked as one of the strongest class-A youkai around and one who has faced a thousand battles, met death in the eye through a million deranged Kurapika fans. Don't you think that's a bit anti-climactic?" asked Kurama.

"Actually, it won't be that bad. Most probably half of Kurapika's fans would also be your fans. So it may not reach millions. Thousands, maybe." Koenma ignored the fact that Kurama just shook his head. But what he did admit was that he was fighting a losing battle. He may be the director, but this was a joint effort between him and Kurama. Besides, the guy did have a point, after all. He wouldn't want a thousand females committing suicide just to be able to reach Reikai to mob him. Reikai is a pretty peaceful place, and he wanted to keep it as that.

Koenma sighed. "Fine, you win," he said, casting the annoying fox a glare. He then shifted his gaze at the counter. "Now, if the little nurse would be so kind enough as to stop drooling all over you, maybe we can get this over with!" He emphasized his point by slamming his hand on the counter, waking the innocent nurse who fell for the spell that is Shuuichi Minamino. Immediately, upon seeing those golden eyes glaring fatally at her, the nurse jumped up and pointed to the eastern hall, saying that room 517 was over there.

"You shouldn't have scared her like that," scolded Kurama as the two walked towards the hall. "After all, she was drooling all over you, too," he said, a sly grin spreading over his handsome face.

The Reikai prince rolled his eyes, dismissing his companion impatiently. "Oh, who cares? She'll marry a fellow nurse, have two kids and die at the age of 73. Typical human life. What's to like?"

"You know, you should really stop snooping around the Life files," commented the red-haired host. But after a while, his eye brightened up and he turned towards Koenma again. "I have another good reason why it's better to have the interview here!"

The Prince of Death turned to him. "What?" he asked.

"We wouldn't have to have an audience! Look, if you remember last time, this Kurapika had so much fans. Ever since the first episode, I think we're both sure of how destructive they are. And look at you in that form. Together, we're the most beautiful men to ever grace Yoshihiro Togashi's works. I'd be shocked if we won't lose the Reikai building all in all!"

Koenma considered this for a while. A few moments passed, and he eventually grinned at his companion. "Yes, definitely conceited," he remarked, but with a sly smirk. "But within reason. My friend, I'm afraid I have to agree." They turned towards their last corridor. "Anyway, we might as well go on with it. Do you have that spider with you?"

* * * * *

Leorio calmly wandered through the halls of the hospital, currently on his way towards the floor's main reception counter to check on his schedule. His eyes briefly gazed down a certain door. He wondered what those two would be doing at the moment. Gon and Killua both asked to be on the same room so they can be together, Killua reasoning that hospitals were boring places especially when you're alone.

The doctor shrugged and decided that a tiny peek wouldn't hurt. It could always be excused as a doctor's concern for the well-being of his patients. With Gon and Killua together, who knows what could happen.

"Agh! Gon, no!"

The indignant voice of a certain white-haired boy rang through his ears, muffled by the thick wooden doors. Leorio blinked. He leaned his head against the door, curious of whatever it was that was going on inside.

"Pleeeeeaaase, Killua? It'll make me really happy!" came Gon's voice this time.

Sounds of struggling, and of something fall on the floor. "No, I'm too young for this!!! And so are you! Good gods, Gon, you're a boy for cryin' out loud!!!"

"So? I find nothing wrong with boys doing this. And it's fun, don't you think so?"

"Yes, but...but but--Gon, no!"

This time, there was a loud crash, like glass breaking. Alarmed, the doctor behind the doors stood there shocked, his mind twisting and turning as he tried to take in what he just heard. Gon and...Killua? No...it was impossible. He never knew Gon knew about such things. He always seemed to be the innocent one. But now...it almost sounded he was the one after Killua.

"Is this okay?"

"No, not there!!!"

Leorio shook his head. No, it shouldn't be. They're preteen boys for God's sake! Kurapika would kill them if he found out. Determined to set things straight once and for all, the young doctor took a deep breath grabbed the doorknob and - regardless of where he was - bellowed:

"STOP THIS INHUMANITY THIS INSTANT!!!"

The door was now fully open, and it revealed - to Leorio's chagrin - two beds pushed together, with both their occupants on but one bed. Killua was pinned down by his dark-haired best friend, who he himself was straddling the pale boy, bent over as if looming on his face. Leorio, ever the brotherly figure, gasped and considered closing his eyes, but that was until he saw what Gon held on his right hand.

A...pink marker?

"Leorio!" came Killua's breathless cry. Using Gon's surprise to the doctor's sudden appearance, he violently pulled one wrist free and started clawing the bed sheets, beckoning the older man to come to his rescue. "Help me, please! He's...he's...he wants to draw a pink kitten on my face!!!"

Leorio stood gaping at the two, but the constant whining caught his attention. Still in a daze, he turned his gaze over to the boy underneath the other who looked like he was near tears. "Excuse me?" asked the doctor uneasily, and sweatdrop coming down the side of his head.

"Pink kitties are cute, but Killua won't believe me!" defended Gon, a pout marring his young face.

"Hell yeah, cats are cute, but you're using a PINK marker! Do you realize what that color can do to a boy's masculinity!?!? We're developing psychological aspects in this fragile stage and you're going to mar my perfect boyhood with that color!? It so clashes with the blue hue of my hair!!!"

"But I like pink!"

"No!!! You like green! GREEN!!!" Killua sat up and held his friend, lamenting over senseless things. Leorio caught various phrases like "my best friend" and "too much feminine side from your aunt and grandmother".

Gon, blinking and knowing nothing of what Killua was trying to say, immediately perked up as if a sudden memory just sparked inside him. "Hey! It's Kurapika's interview today, right?" he asked the doctor by the door, who was still standing wordlessly since he came. "Are you sure you won't watch with us, Leorio? Can't you get a break?"

"Eh, you know how adults run their lives. Work has to come first," said Killua, who has now recovered from his ranting. He let Gon go and went beneath the covers to extract the remote control so he could turn on the TV. "Oh well, their loss."

While Killua was busy, Gon blinks and suddenly looks down at the cast around Killua's left forearm. A wide grin came on his face. Marker in hand, he crept closer...

* * * * *

"Good evening!"

From a random home in the city, the TV is tuned in on Exclusive Interviews by Shuuichi Minamino. But despite the title, it wasn't the face of Shuuichi Minamino that greeted the audience. Instead, an unfamiliar face (unfamiliar to non-YYH viewers anyway) graced the screen; a good-looking young man with dark brown hair and eyes of glistening gold.

Koenma Daioh nodded, as if sensing his unseen audience's questions. "For tonight's episode, I, Koenma Daioh, shall be your host. But don't panic, for Kurama would still be with us, but he shall be posing as an assistant host and also a special 'guest'. He is said to be the counterpart of our interviewee for tonight. For our loyal audience, the concept of counterparts need not be explained further. Now, to go on, please welcome, Mr. Kurapika!"

The camera shifted to - strangely - a hospital bed, occupied with a blonde teen. He was staring suspiciously at Koenma for some reason.

"Wait a second," he started, turning his head towards Kurama. "Are you telling me that this guy here is the same noisy brat I saw last time? You know, the little kid on the director's seat?"

A small vein visibly twitched from the side of Koenma's head.

"Is it so strange to you, Kurapika-san?" asked Kurama.

The blonde boy continued to stare at Koenma's mature form. "It's a surprise, that's all. I thought he was the director's son or something. I mean, he was kind of temperamental for a child--"

"What the hell do you mean by that!? Who in here almost ended up behind bars for hurting countless civilians anyway?" asked the prince, his temper quickly rising. He never really liked being criticized, especially by a kid. "I demand you take that statement back!"

"Oh, never mind, Kurama-san. The question concerning noisy brats has already been answered," said the blonde, fully ignoring the Reikai prince.

Koenma was glaring. "You're going to die a slow, painful death someday, child."

"I think we should just go on with the interview," Kurama said, cutting off further words from his co-host. "Kurapika-san, I ask of you to please be a little patient. We know that this is not the right time for your interview right now--"

"Damn right, so what the hell are you doing here?"

A brow twitched, but nothing more. "--but since we're told that you're pretty much capable of speaking, we thought it best to go with the schedule," explained Kurama, wisely choosing to ignore the other's snappy remark.

From his side of the bed, Koenma was mentally calculating the reasons why this annoying kid on the bed didn't pass as Hiei's counterpart. The whole temper issue is definitely obvious.

"Okay, Koenma-sama, I think it's your turn to speak now?"

Koenma nodded, but not without casting a final glare at his interviewee first. "Right, Kurapika-san," he drawled, but paused for a moment to quirk a sarcastic brow at his cue card. But not able to think of anything else to replace the question, he asked anyway. "We've heard of the last accident you, Gon and Killua have been in. How are you feeling? And would it be all right for you to spare a bit of details on what happened?"

Without missing a beat, Kurapika spoke. "Momentary insanity," he said, glaring at the camera. "When it comes to friends, Gon never thinks."

"And when it comes to friendly teases, you're not a very good sport," added Koenma, thinking of the fact that it was Kurapika himself who threw Gon's friend off the building anyway. He quickly jumped up in surprise when he felt something kick his ankle below the bed. The prince looked up to glare at his co-host, who was conveniently feigning innocence as he kept his gaze at their interviewee. As if on cue, Kurapika's glare was dead set on him.

"But that is one of Gon-kun's most appealing characteristics, is it not?" asked Kurama to save Koenma's neck. He was still highly fond of the dark-haired boy, and his smile was still intact as if he didn't just kick the Prince of Death on the sheens.

"I guess...I suppose you can say that," mumbled Kurapika, trying his best to stop glaring at the bratty Reikai prince. "Anyway, Gon and Killua are on the other room right across this one. They wanted to be roommates."

Koenma, also trying his best to not pounce on the just as bratty Kuruta, went on doing his job. "Gon and Killua seem to be very close. There are four of you in the group, and obviously eliminated from the pair are you and Leorio-san. This very same question has been given to Leorio-san, but we would also like to hear your side. So, what is your relationship with the doctor?" he asked.

"We're friends," was Kurapika's deadpan answer.

"What about the sticky exchanges you two get into in certain episodes? And not to mention ending songs?" persisted the Reikai prince.

The Kuruta's eyes flashed furious red. "What sticky exchanges!?"

"Well, I mean, Kurama and Hiei are really close friends but you don't see them doing what you and Leorio do..."

"What the hell are you talking about!?" Kurama promptly stood up to hold the boy down the bed, so Kurapika had no other choice but to take a deep breath to calm himself down. "Leorio and I are friends. Normally I wouldn't admit this, but just so people would get off our case and stop being delusional perverts, I'd like to properly say that I consider Leorio as one of the very few people I've been close to ever since a bunch of lunatics attacked my race. He is completely trustworthy - again, I'll regret saying this someday - and understands things not everybody can. Somehow, we share the same memories and our stories go on the same line, so we can relate with each other. One would find comfort in knowing that there is someone who can understand his own feelings, and the comfort comes from that."

Koenma nodded hesitantly, a thought still bothering his mind. "Ookay," he said, tapping his cheek with his cue cards. "Isn't that also the basis of the LeoPika fans? You know, for romance?"

Kurapika's brow twitched, but he chose to keep his calm. After all, his nurse told him to keep movements to a minimum, so punching the rude prince may not be a very good idea. It was a very tempting notion though. "I don't know, but to me it only borders on friendship. Actually, I endured a 30-minute lecture with Killua regarding these questions. He said that I shouldn't say anything about it. Unless you'd want to hear a creative collection of curses, I think I'll just follow his advice," he said wearily.

"Anou, unfortunately," mumbled Kurama, giving Kurapika an uneasy smile. "Kurapika-san is undeniably one of the top most popular characters in Hunter X Hunter, if not the most popular at all. So Kurapika-san, if you won't mind it very much, we have a list here of the characters that are paired with you."

"Oh. I would mind, but perhaps not very much," came the Kuruta's sarcastic answer. He wasn't usually this hot-tempered, but physical pain inflicted by bodily wounds and a fever caused by the body's trying to heal itself, some could say that it was inevitable.

But that was as close as a 'yes' as they had, so the two hosts went on. From his side, Koenma took a piece of paper from a pocket inside his coat and read from it. "Okay, so we're done with Leorio. Any last words for it?"

Kurapika faced the camera. "Leorio and I are friends and to those who want something more from us, you can drop dead and go to hell."

Kurama, partially getting used to the younger man's temper, tried to stifle a snicker. He gestured for Koenma to go on.

"Okay. How about Killua?" asked the prince.

"Killua may be a bit of a bratty pervert sometimes, but no, he doesn't go farther than TV materials. Besides, I consider him as a brother. He is a good friend and I suppose we are close, but only a seriously perverted mind would see more than mere friendship. Besides, he's much closer to Gon, and we barely even talk. Has anybody noticed that at all!? What the hell is up with you people!?!?"

Koenma sweatdropped. "Ookay. How about Neon Nostrard?"

Kurapika frowned and had to think of his answer for a while. "I'm not saying that she's bad," he started slowly. "But I never really looked at her that way. Sure she's good-looking, but I'm sorry to say but Neon-san is just a bit...well, she loves to talk. And she loves to do things I never really can relate to, like shopping, talking, etc. We're nothing alike. Plus she, uh...loves to talk. I'm not very patient and she really loves to talk."

Kurama nodded, fully knowing how it was to be with extremely perky girls. But he chose to keep his silence because a huge chunk of his fans were perky girls. He couldn't afford to lose them lest he suffers the eyes of his co-characters. After all, they would always tell him that he does a lot about keeping the fan girls loyal.

"Aside from that, I guess Neon-san isn't very bad. I'm just not interested I guess. I'm quite happy where I am right now," said the Kuruta, calming down for the first time, or so it seems.

"With Leorio," said Koenma with a slight smirk.

Kurapika just glared at him. From his side, Kurama was glaring as well.

"Ri-ight," said Koenma, checking back on his list again to avoid being roasted on the spot with two people glaring at him. He hesitated asking about this next one, but after all, it was part of the job. "Another one of the more popular ones is...Kuroro, the leader of--" But before Koenma could go on, there was a loud snapping sound from the bed, and without warning, a very furious red flashed in front of the demi-god's eyes.

"WHAT DOES HE HAVE TO DO WITH ANYTHING!?!?" bellowed Kurapika, losing his cool yet again. Had it not been for the cast on the Kuruta's arm, Koenma could've sworn that he'd have claws around his neck by then.

"Nothing!" said a voice from behind Kurapika, and promptly, a pair of hands came up to grab the young man by the arms to settle him back down on the bed. "The name 'Kuroro' must've found its way on the list, but I assure you that it isn't intentional," said Kurama. He then gave his co-host The Look.

Koenma, desperately needing his aspirin, dropped his head for a second before continuing. "Okay!" he announced, going back to the list. "I suppose we should scratch the whole of Geneiryodan now."

"WHAT THE HELL ARE THEY DOING THERE TO BEGIN WITH!?!?!?!?!"

"Yes, definitely scratching Machi, Shizuku, Hisoka--"

"HISOKA!?"

"Yes, well, you did work together some time ago, didn't you? And after all, during the exam, you two were--well, what are you anyway? You get paired up with boys and girls and some of them are not even yaoi. The truth, kid, are you a man or not?"

"Do I need to take my top off for you people again!? I already did that, what the hell is your damage!? And Hisoka! Can we go back to that? Why would anyone pair me up with that guy!?"

"Apart from the fact that you can be paired up with absolutely anyone in and out of the show, Hisoka-san is also quite popular."

"Hisoka? Hisoka!? Are we even talking about the same Hisoka here??"

"Well, the list says that--"

"I think that's enough," said Kurama, snatching the list away from Koenma. But unfortunately, he was too late, and the Kuruta's eyes were flashing dangerously red, his free hand clawed menacingly in front of the Reikai prince's throat. Heaving a defeated sigh, the red-haired young man stood up and pressed the button connecting them to the nurse's counter.

* * * * *

"He-ey!" whined a pouting Killua as he now stared at a blank TV screen. "It was just getting good!"

Gon, who was sitting up on the bed right beside Killua's, also blinked up at the blank screen. They were just watching Kurapika's interview when all of a sudden, just when Kurapika was about to attack the director and temporary host, they were presented yet again with a blank screen. Like the one from Killua's interview. "I think they should just shift the show from being live to something scheduled. I mean, they can't keep doing this, right Killua?"

There was an awful amount of ruckus from the room across from theirs. Killua grinned. "Oh no, Gon! Don't even go there! I like this show as is!" he said, grinning from ear to ear.

"Yes, but--" Gon remembered the look on Kurapika's eyes. That was his...well, Killua and Leorio dubbed it as the 'DIE' look. And for a good reason, too. "What if he accidentally kills the Prince of Reikai?" he asked worriedly. He didn't want Kurapika to kill. It took his all - and a bunch of devices Leorio placed on him to keep him and Killua in place, he wondered if it was because of the riot they caused a while ago - to not get up and save Kurapika from himself.

Killua sighed and reached out towards Gon, seeing the look in his eyes. "Don't worry," he said, petting his best friend's shoulder. "There won't be any accidents when it comes to Kurapika. He has a mind of his own," he said. But just when Gon was about to reply, Killua broke into a grin again. "If he kills that prince, he knows exactly what he's doing."

He was just about to snicker at his own joke, but that was before he tilted his head to look at his arm. There, in a perfectly straight row, were five little pink piglets drawn on his cemented cast.

Gon saw the look and brightened up. "Oh! You didn't want the cats, so I decided to just use piglets. Do you like it?" he asked innocently. "See, it's like this. This little piggy went to market...and this little piggy went to the zoo..."

Killua paled. "Noooo!!! Gon, I'm going to kill you!!!"

* * * * *

"Sensei," called the nurse behind the desk. Leorio looked up from what he was doing to regard her politely. The young lady continued. "Room 517 asked for a mild tranquilizer. Which one do you think would be appropriate?" she asked.

"Exactly how mild?" the doctor asked, his eyes skimming through the clipboard he was holding, signing what he was supposed to sign.

"Strong enough to calm the patient down but not strong enough to make him go to sleep instantly. I think they're having an interview there. Do you think we should stop it? I mean, I know it's just a broken arm, but the patient needs rest and--"

It dawned on him immediately. Leorio sighed. Kurapika. He should've known.

"Don't worry," he said, handing the nurse the clipboard. "I'll take care of it."

"Oh. And sensei. One of the nurses said that Room 516 was getting noisy. Perhaps you should go check on the patients as well."

516? An image of two kids burning a whole box of matches under their covers - or other activities close to that insanity - came to his mind. Great. "No need," said the doctor with a wary sigh. "Just give me another set of tranquilizers."

* * * * *

Hisoka scowled at the blank screen, but not for the same reasons as most people's. He turned to the young man beside him - for some reason, he and Illumi became avid fans of this stupid show. But oh well. Back to the question at hand.

"That brat!" he said, folding his arms. Illumi regarded him with nothing more than a small quirk of a brow, but Illumi being Illumi, that was the best expression anyone can get from him. Hisoka continued. "I mean, so what if we're paired together sometimes? I mean, it's not like I was the traitor between the two of us," he whined, using the spare time to vent out his frustrations. "I mean, I'm not that bad. I'm good-looking enough. You find me attractive, don't you, Illumi?"

A weird pause.

Illumi gave the magician a strange look. "Hisoka, please tell me that you don't expect me to answer that," he said, mildly disturbed by Hisoka's question.

Hisoka pouted. "But--"

"Welcome back, everyone!"

"The show's back."

"But Illumi~!"

"Shut up, Hisoka."

"But--!!!"

"Look." The assassin faced the other. "You don't have a girlfriend. Does that mean anything to you?"

The magician merely blinked. "But I thought you said that I don't have any girlfriends because I tend to scare half of the world population with my sadistic tendencies and drive the other half insane?" he answered defensively.

Illumi rolled his eyes. "Hisoka, the show's on. Please let it go."

"Hm...so, if half and half makes a whole, which side are you on?"

"...Is that what you call a decent question?"

Another pout. "Fine," sulked the magician, scooting away from the assassin, settling himself on the far end of the couch. "Don't speak to me unless you stop being such a jerk. And unless you admit that I'm attractive," he said, stubbornly turning his head away but not before he stuck an indignant tongue out at the assassin.

Again, Illumi just had to roll his eyes.

* * * * *

"And...we're back," announced Koenma, his face dominating the screen again. "We sincerely apologize for yet another cut on our show. Because of circumstances beyond our control, me and my co-host decided to allow a special guest in on the show to accompany us until our last segment."

The screen momentarily flashed towards Leorio, who was currently sitting on a chair on the opposite side of the room. "Yo," he greeted, lifting up a hand for a simple wave.

The camera shifted back on the other side of the room. Kurapika was now heaving deep breathes of air, one slender hand's fingers holding up a ball of cotton on his bare arm. "Stupid tranquilizer. If I was asked, this bratty prince needs it more than I do," he mumbled to himself. Kurama gave him a sympathetic look.

"And now, we're on to our last segment," continued Koenma. "This is probably what you've all been waiting for. We have time for but a few questions with us, but we hope it would suffice." He then turned to Kurama and Kurapika. "First question: How does it feel like being the best loved characters in your own respective shows?"

Kurama gestured towards Kurapika, telling him to speak first.

"Well," said Kurapika, unsure for the first time on what he's supposed to say. "I suppose it's not so bad. But I swear, Killua would do better with the fans bit. I mean, not that I dislike anybody--" A snort came from the other end of the room. Leorio immediately looked away, looking innocent, earning himself a glare from the Kuruta. But he continued anyway. "--But I'm just not up for this popularity thing. I value my privacy and...well, you just don't get much of it when you're being jumped half the time. I mean, you saw what happened during Leorio's interview."

Koenma nodded. He then turned to Kurama.

"Well, I'm kind of comfortable with people, so it's really not that bad," said Kurama, casting the young Kuruta a smile. "I mean, one would get used to it eventually. You've got to admit, the fans tend to flatter. In a way, one would feel honored nonetheless. Sure there's the hassle, but if one can tolerate it, it's all right."

"Second question: Do you have a special someone right now?" Immediately, Koenma grimaced at that question. "Who the hell makes these things!?"

Kurama sweatdropped. "Isn't it funny that we don't know, Koenma?" he asked, letting out a sheepish laugh. "Anyway, my answer for that is no. I don't have a special someone if we're speaking romantically. My mother is still the most important person to me," he said, smiling brightly.

Koenma can almost hear viewers miles around cheer in joy. Or maybe it was the nurses at the floor counters that he heard?

"Anou, I don't have one either," said Kurapika.

Did he say cheer? Koenma thought he felt a violent earthquake for a second there. Simultaneous fans jumping for joy, he supposed...

"I don't have enough time with me and I don't think I'm up for a commitment. Like I said, my privacy means a lot to me, and I don't think I'm up for sharing my life with anybody special just yet," continued the young Kuruta.

"Oh?" asked Koenma. He couldn't help but shift a sidelong glance at the doctor behind the cameraman. Unfortunately, Leorio saw the look. He frowned almost immediately.

"Wha-at??" he asked, looking over his shoulder to check if Koenma's looking someplace else. All that there was there was but the white, blank wall.

Kurapika saw the look as well. Needless to say, he was glaring daggers at Koenma yet again. "Start on that again and I'll be sure to royally throw you off the building, your majesty," he drawled with a tinge of sadistic sarcasm.

"I didn't say anything!" defended Koenma, and he quickly shot back down at his cards again. "This'll be our last question. What's...your favorite color??" he stopped, gawking at the card he was holding. He snapped. "Who's the moron who comes up with these questions anyway!?!? This is an interview, not an autograph book!"

Kurapika sweatdropped. "Uh...I never really thought about it. I'll go for red I suppose, in memory of my clan," he said.

"Cute! I pick red too! It's so good for hair color," said Kurama cheerfully, patting Kurapika's back. He then cast his co-host a look and saw him eating up his cue cards for some strange reason. He was muttering to himself, something about 'stupid fan girls'. Kurama just dismissed it, seeing that they were out of time. "That's all we have for tonight, everyone! I would like to thank my co-host and director, Koenma-sama," he said. Koenma was stomping on the cue cards now. "And also, to Kurapika-san of lending us his time even in such a predicament."

"Yare yare..." dismissed Kurapika, waving his hand frantically. He seemed to be shuddering in his bed. "I mean, you blackmailed me into it anyway. Now can you please take that spider from under my bed and throw it out somewhere before I kill it myself?"

"Kurapika's sick and you're placing a spider under his bed!?" came Leorio's defense, his doctor and best friend's instincts coming up.

Kurama sweatdropped. "It was Koenma's idea," he said, pointing at the prince.

"Yeah, but who got the spider?" defended the prince. He then cast a sly look on the doctor. "Is that a hint of concern I hear from your voice, sensei?"

"Quit it with those perverted cracks, you poor-excuse-for-a-god-of-Death!" cried both Leorio and Kurapika simultaneously.

Kurama watched the three with weary eyes and just cast a sheepish smile at the camera. "That's all we have for tonight, everyone. Take care, and be sure to tune in for the next episode. For our next interviewee, we have Hisoka, the mysterious magician whose stand never really was too clear." Somewhere in the background, Kurama could've sworn he heard somebody cry out a "No, not that creepy guy!", but with all the commotion, he wasn't sure. So instead, he just continued to smile and bade the viewers goodbye. "That's it, good night to you all!"

* * * * *

From another end of the city, a pale hand reached out to turn the TV off. Illumi sighed, flipping his hair back impatiently before facing the other man beside him. "Oh for cryin' out loud, Hisoka. You can't stay angry with me forever. You'd talk to me eventually."

"No, I won't."

"Yes, you would. You're too talkative and you have no one else to talk to."

"I am not talkative! And besides, I'll just play with my cards than talk to you."

Illumi sweatdropped. "You just did, stupid. Twice."

The assassin could've sworn he saw Hisoka flinch. This notion was confirmed when Hisoka just slapped his hand on his forehead, frustrated that he was tricked. He gave the assassin a menacing glare. "Well, it won't happen again," he said.

"You're talking to me now," Illumi pointed out.

"Am not!" Hisoka turned away and covered his ears.

For the third time that night, Illumi had to roll his eyes.

End of Episode 4

Whoa, got pretty long. Ehe...oh let me off, it's not like wasting people's time with crap that was too long to undergo an extensive beta-reading is considered a mortal sin or anything...*gets hit with a thrown dictionary*