(16 June 2003)
Part 4: Dirt, Sweat and Sin
It was settled. There was nothing – NOTHING – better in the world than a nice hot shower. There was something rejuvenating about a shower that Rogue found irresistible. You entered as one person and emerged as another. All the dirt, sweat and sins are erased, leaving you a clean slate to start the cycle all over again. Lord knows we all need as many fresh starts as we c'n get.
She adjusted the showerhead until she found a massage setting that didn't make her feel like she was under attack and let the hot water work its magic while her mind wandered. She was disappointed in herself for falling back into the self-absorbed misery that afternoon. Kitty was the focus of this trip, Rogue was here to help Kitty work through her pain, not to put the girl in a situation where she had to support Rogue's sorry butt. Yeah, you been hurt. Ain't nothin' new. Life'll either go back t' whatever passes for normal or it won't. Either way you'll cope. But Kitty, she's got her whole life ahead'a her. She c'n do better'n just "cope". If somebody don't do somethin', she'll throw it all away. Can't let that happen.
Rogue's decision to "escape" with Kitty had been just the sort of impulsive decision Rogue was famous for, but she knew that ultimately, she was the best person for the job. Ororo had a team to look after and couldn't afford the time away, however much she might have wanted to take it. 'Sides, there's always somethin' 'bout Storm that feels…judgmental. I dunno, maybe that's just mah own conscience talkin' here, but she always has this way o' makin' ya feel so blasted guilty. Ah love 'Ro t' death, but ah don't think a goddess-eye view o' the situation is gonna help Kitty come t' terms with anythin'.
Logan had been there when it happened, and Rogue had initially thought about pitching her "vacation" idea to him. Further consideration had convinced her that was probably the polar opposite of what Kitty needed, Logan was more likely to confuse the situation even more. Kitty had grown up under Logan's watchful eye. She was one of "Logan's Kids", something that Rogue could relate to only too well. It fostered something akin to a hero worship that they never quite grew out of, regardless of age or experience. Unfortunately, Logan was the epitome of a "grey area" and Kitty was drowning in grey. Logan had killed. Would kill again. No, definitely not the best choice.
She had next considered calling Kurt and getting him to "bamf" on over for a visit, but dismissed that idea almost as soon as she had it. Kurt's religion made it pretty clear where he would stand on the issue, and Rogue doubted that a confession and a "Hail Mary" were going to make things right again.
To Rogue's mind the only, best choice was clear. She, perhaps more than anybody, knew where Kitty was coming from. She'd been standing at the edge (hell, she'd been plummeting head-first down the cliff!) and knew first-hand what a fall like that would cost. Besides, she could do with some time away herself. Away from the feelings of uselessness, away from the painful memories, and, for the moment, away from him.
Rogue turned the water off, noticing for the first time that it was starting to run cold. She grabbed two towels off the rack, wrapping the first around her body and using the second on her hair. The mirror had disappeared under a thick fog, and Rogue swiped her hand across the surface, leaving behind a momentary patch of clarity. She stared as the mirror again became obscured, and a pair of emerald eyes, full of resolve and determination stared back.
William Stryker had hurt Kitty. Kitty had killed William Stryker. Rogue was bound and determined to see that the man did no more harm from beyond the grave.
