(same as before) Disclaimer: Like everyone else writing fan fics...I do not own any of the characters from Flame of Recca (all is borrowed) I am only using them to entertain myself and others in the writing of fan fiction.
Chapter 3: Forgotten Memories *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Fuuko shut her eyes as the wind lifted her hair gently, spreading threads of purple all around her face. Her feet flew in the air as she swung herself higher on the swings. The wind cupped her face and blew away her frown. All she knew was that this was a moment where she felt free - free of Domon, Mikagami, and Seth, free of all her worries and emotions- she was soaring.
"Fuuko nee-chan~~~" Ganko grabbed the swing to an abrupt stop.
"Oooofff" Fuuko clung onto the chain of the swing as it jerked her away from the seat. "Ganko~~!" Fuuko yelled as she tumbled onto the ground. "Ganko! I wasn't ready to get off yet!" Fuuko brushed the dirt off her pants as she stood up from a very awkward fall.
"Its getting late! I want to get home in time for Card Captor Sakura!" Ganko pouted. "Even though you promised you would play with me today, all you did was mope around...then you got on the swings and ignored me. I want to leave"
"Sumimasen Ganko-chan" Fuuko ruffled tresses of Ganko's sun colored hair and forced a smile upon her face "Some unpleasant things are on my mind..."
"Fine. But I'm going home now" Ganko ran off without another word, leaving Fuuko staring at the trail of dust swirling behind Ganko's footsteps.
"What is going on today?" Fuuko muttered to herself "First that weird lunch encounter with Mi-chan...then Sensei made me welcome that Mi-chan look-alike, Seth. Heh heh heh...they sure do look-alike...maybe he's Mi-chan's lost long distant relative brother type thing. But its weird, my feeling uncomfortable around him." Fuuko racked her mind once more for a logical explanation on her emotions. "Its probably because of his uncanny resemblance to Mi-chan. Yup! Seeing a 'Mi-chan' smile and grab my hand was probably what triggered the uncomfortable feelings near him...hmmmm...What a day...what a day" Fuuko sighed. What's on Ganko's mind? Normally, no matter how irritated she became, she would not run off like that...but since we live nearby, she should be okay. Fuuko sat back on the swing again. Since she was alone, she might as well enjoy that carefree sensation once more. Just as she was about to soar into the air, a sudden pang of loneliness struck her. The past was haunting her again. She tried to make it go away.
((Fuuko>>the past smiled crookedly((You should not have ignored me...))
What?!Fuuko jerked her head around only to realize that it was her memories speaking to her...
((You've forgotten me...))
No I haven't.Fuuko rubbed her chest, trying to ease the shock of the past.Leave me alone won't you? I have better things to worry about...
((You don't. There's only one thing troubling you. We all know what that is...))Fuuko's mind joined the past Emptiness
The sound of the word was so resolute it echoed in Fuuko's mind, vibrating off the walls of her consciousness.
((You've forgotten that day...))The past's voice trailed off into the distance as an image of a woman crouching next to a small girl clutching a teddy floated into her mind...
The small girl yawned as she rubbed her puffy red eyes. "Mommy?" the little girl stifled another yawn as she inched closer to her mother "Mommy, why are we up so early?"
"I wanted you to watch the sunrise with me" The mother's gentle smile warmed the little girl's heart.
"What's so good about the sunrise? I'm tired" She hugged her teddy in protest as the mother ruffled the girl's unkempt hair.
"Its so beautiful. Look at the colors of the sky. Look at how the sun fights off the darkness of the earth as it sprads across the land, just by touching it. The darkness disappears in an instant. Isn't that amazing?" The mother directed the girl's gaze onto the horizon composed of a canvas of brilliant colors - purple, gold, pink and orange - all splashed across a slowly brightening sky.
"Why are we really here?" The little girl was annoyed. She sensed that her mother was hiding something. She could see the change in her mother's eyes - what used to be an astounding gleam of emerald green was now reduced to a lifeless pair of whites. The change frightened the little girl, but she decided to remain strong for her mother. "Mommy, What's wrong?" She couldn't hide the quaver in her voice as she spoke.
"Nothing's wrong today. No. Today will be our perfect day together." Her mother held her close. "Oh look! I can see the sun coming up now..."
((Fuuko cursed at the past. Why was it showing her this? When she focused back onto her memory she realized that she was already brought to the end of that particular day))
"Mommy, why are we back here again?" The little girl looked around her; this was the place where they watched the sun illuminate the earth.
"We're here to see the sunset" The mother hugged the little girl as she pointed towards the sky.
"Why does the sky seem so sad?" The little girl held onto her mother tighter, she did not like this feeling of fading warmth.
"Because the sky is loosing to darkness. Nightfall will come and wash away all the warmth and happiness that came from the sun"
"Why are you crying?" The little girl's heart broke as she watched her mother's tears dampened the bright red ribbon her teddy. She looked up at her mother in grave concern.
"Daddy left today." The mother's voice shock as she chocked out these words in gentlest manner possible.
"He said he would come back" The little girl pouted, Daddy always did what he said he would do...
"No he didn't want to hurt your feelings...that's why he told you he would return" The mother's grip on the little girl was so tight it began to hurt her so she started to squirm.
"Why did Daddy leave?"
"Well. Mommy told Daddy certain things and he decided that he should leave. Its for the best. Really. It's for the best."
"What did you tell him?" A conflict was brewing in the heart of the little girl. She was angry, sad, confused and lost. Aall at the same time. She did not know how to react to herself so she decided that the only way to make herself feel better was getting Mommy to tell her everything.
"You won't understand"
"But..." She knew she was being stubborn, but she really wanted to understand.
"Honey" The mother kissed her daughter reassuringly on the forehead.
"I want to know" Unannounced tears were pouring down the face of the little girl. She did not understand. Why was she feeling this way? She felt so empty...as if something dear had been snatched away from her heart and left an empty carcass
"Mommy told Daddy a family secret" The little girl's ears perked at the word secret. "and he decided that he should leave"
"Just because of the secret?" Why was one secret was so powerful that it would make her father leave her?
"Yes darling, because of the secret" The mother couldn't bear watching her daughter's crestfallen face much longer.
"What's the secret?" Though her heart hurt, the little girl decided to continue probing for the truth.
"Have you ever wondered why Mommy was never happy for very long?" The mother ran her fingers through the plum colored locks of her daughter's hair. The little girl sniffed as she nodded her head. "Its awful but the same thing will happen to you..."
"Why Mommy?" The little girl raised her eyebrows in confusion. She didn't want to be unhappy. She didn't want to cry like her Mommy. Happiness stems from a smile, well, that's what her nursery school teacher told her, and she believed it too. Suddenly the little girl decided that if she retained her smile, she would always be happy no matter what.
"I'm not allowed to tell you..." the mother whipped her eyes dry, her voice so final the little girl decided just to listen. "Just remember one thing honey...one thing"
"What Mommy?" The little girl sensed that she was loosing her mother. She didn't know why, but she felt her mother leaving her.
"Remember. When you get too close to somebody, you will hurt yourself." Her mother's eyes began to fade a little, loosing the already dim light in her eyes.
"What does that mean?" The little girl clutched her mother hard. Maybe, she thought, maybe if she held onto her long enough, her mommy would stop acting so strangely.
"Don't get too close."
"Mommy" the little girl started sobbing, she didn't understand and she didn't want to understand. All she wanted was her mommy to come back and hug her with a true smile. "I don't understand Mommy"
"When you get older you'll understand..." The little girls' mother leaned in to give her one last hug, a strong hug that squeezed all the warmth out of her body. As she drew away from the hug, she gave the little girl a peck on the cheek and muttered, "Goodbye Fuuko-chan. Remember, don't get too close¡K" The mother stood up and started walking away, ignoring her daughter's confused sobs and protests.
Tears streamed down the little girl's face as she watched her mother fade away into the darkness. There she stood, clutching her fists and facing an incoming loom of darkness...her heart empty from her mother's departure. She was small and she did not understand. But she knew one thing; she was going to remain happy no matter what. If she never stopped smiling and being cheerful, she would never be unhappy. It was then that she decided never to cry or frown again. She stood, and remembered that she would never loose her smile.
((You've forgotten that haven't you? The past chuckled as it drew Fuuko out of her memory))
Fuuko opened her eyes slowly...she was still in the park sitting on the swings. She checked herself and discovered tears on her face from reliving a piece of her long-forgotten memory.
"Is this why I'm always smiling for no reason? I'm not an insane optimist then...I just pretend to be one, in order to be happy..." Fuuko rocked herself on the swings gently "My mother's sudden disappearance and her words...don't get too close. Was she right in saying that I'll never remain happy? Was she right?" Fuuko's eyes glistened from the reflection of light on her tears. I thought that I would be happy if I smiled all the time. I am happy. I am smiling. I have friends...true, genuine friends.
((Then why do you feel like this? Her past questioned her Why are there tears on your face and a large gapping hole of emptiness in your heart?))
I don't know... And with those words, Fuuko cupped her face in her hands as tears overflowed her palms and created a wet puddle around her swing. She sat on the swing and cried. She let herself go. She wasn't happy and she had no more energy to force herself. For the first time since her mother left, Fuuko stopped smiling.
Author's note (once more): I hope the flashback wasn't too hard to understand :) Hopefully it was followable...arggggghhhh~~~ I hate seeing Fuuko like this...but she's going to remain like this for a while. Sorry! But it has to be so **sigh** I know she's stronger than this. But a little OOC-ness for the plot. All will be revealed in due time. I'm so lame. Not a cliffhanger ending right? (I hope). Okay. I promise better and happier details in the next chapter. More of Seth and Mi-chan. More. Sneak revealing - the name of the next chapter will be "Confusing Encounters". Read what you want into that title. mwhahahahaha. I think I'm being too stupid/obvious. I've realized that I've begun to write very lazidly. I use "..." all the time instead of proper puncutation. I'll get better (hopefully) Again, thanks to all those who reviewed¡K**bows deeply** Any comments/suggestions/bashing/responses will be nice...^_^ thank you. Arigatougosaemase (is that how you spell this?)
