AN: Whooo hooo~~~~~~ I finally got 5 reviews for one chapter!! Yeah! Moral support rules! Even though it is finals time, I am still going to write the next chapter. Perhaps, as a "treat" for study breaks? Well. . . individual thank-yous are at the end of this chapter. . . scroll down the page! Read my fic please ^_^
Disclaimer: I don't own nothin' 'cept for the plot. . . Sue me and I'll claim innocence
Fuuko yawned as she put down her pencil. It was already four in the morning. She was too tired to think about her mother's words Don't get too close. . .
She had stayed up all night doodling on a piece of lined paper. Rarely has she ever probed so deep into something before and had gotten nowhere. Usually the answers just came after a while, but this time, they didn't. Fine, Fuuko admitted to herself, I really don't know how to handle my emotions. She snorted at herself; she had always been an insane optimist and always blocked any hint of negative emotion from showing.
Fuuko sighed. Is there no end to this misery? She really didn't want to go to school. Everything just seemed so lifeless to her now. The morning sun was turning dull. Nothing made her smile. . .nothing except for the occasional encounters with. . .certain people.
A black hole penetrated Fuuko's mind. It reminded Fuuko of the persistent dream she always had. Darkness slowly devoured her. She could sense the void. It was beckoning her to wallow in its nothingness and forget all the unhappiness that had come to pass. It invited her to cease thinking. . . her only claim to reality was feeling, emotions? Emotions for . . .
Fuuko. . . Fuuko. . . the time is approaching
The sound of this voice jerked Fuuko away from the black hole occupying her mind. Did she hear something? It probably was an illusion (like so many other things in her life). Fuuko leaned back on her chair. Might as well take a walk, its too late to go to bed. She had been thinking too much. Some fresh air would purge her mind of all these. . . trivial worries. She slipped on a thin jacket, stopped by Ganko's room and adjusted her bed sheets before heading outside.
After tossing and turning in his bed for several hours consecutively, Mikagami flipped on the lamp adjacent to his bed. His shut his eyes immediately to the sudden influex of white light. He couldn't concentrate on sleeping. Mikagami grumbled, he hated being denied peaceful slumber. Why now, of all times, is the monkey and her new friend troubling him? It was already four am. At this stage, sleeping won't help him anymore. He pulled a sweater over his head, grabbed his eyes and headed out to catch some fresh air.
How cliché can events turn out? Not very, it seems.
Mikagami knelt in front of his sister's grave, staring at the engravings on the tombstone. Mikagami Mifuyu. He traced the name with his fingers. For once, his mind was blank. He didn't feel regret, remorse, sorrow or anger. His mind was surprisingly blank. He furrowed his brows. What happened? Didn't he love his sister beyond anything? He didn't know what was wrong with him. Perhaps he had learned to forget. That was unlikely. Perhaps he just became num too all that emotion built up inside of him. Perhaps it was too much and he had just struck his limit. It hurt too much. Was this the breaking point? Was it possible that he could not feel anymore? No emotion for anyone. Mikgami sighed as he dusted off his pants. He wondered what he could have become had his sister not been murdered. Carefree? Could he, God forbid, end up like one of those monkeys? Jumping around all day, laughing and making raucous? He snickered as the thought passed his mind. To feel again, ah, that would be nice. But, it seemed all too late for now, too many years of anguish and living for the wrong purpose. He sighed and headed home.
Fuuko leapt across the street. She ran headlessly. It felt good to have this adrenaline rush again. If anything, her mind was freed from conscious thought. All she had to do was run, run and be with the wind, the element that she once controlled. The sky was clearing up. The first ray of morning sun was going to hit the street, soon all the darkness will go away. Maybe, Fuuko thought, if she stood where the sun's ray would hit, the darkness inside of her will disappear as well. If only life could be like that. . .
Then, unexpectedly
Wham!
"Ow. Watch it! Don't you have eyes?"
"Mi-chan? What are you doing here?" Fuuko grinned, forgetting that she just body slammed the ice man who was currently rubbing the points where his body hit the floor and where Fuuko hit him.
"Fuu. . . Monkey!?" Mikagami was shocked at well, but not too surprised as to forget to chide her with a snide remark "Forgot your manners so early in the morning?"
"Whatever." Fuuko turned her back towards Mikagami as he stood up. "I should go home now. It's a bit, um, early for school'
"Insane. Absolutely insane." Mikagami shook his head. "Its already 6am. School begins in an hour."
"True." Fuuko replied, without any of her usual cheeriness so warmth.
Could this be the true her, Mikagami wondered, not one silly monkey, but silent, serious . . . just like himself? Has she met her breaking point?
"Are you going to lapse back into that void again?" Mikagami tried to ask as sincerely as possible. Fuuko's head jerked up at the mention of void. She trembled slightly, but nothing ever passed Mikgami's eyes unnoticed. He eyed her suspiciously.
"uh. Mi-chan. Um. I don't. . ." Fuuko trailed off. She didn't know how to reply. I mean, how could you explain what was going through her head? How can you explain what she was feeling? Especially to Mikagami. Especially.
"Why are you so silent?" Mikagami pressed on, just a bit.
"Why do you care?" Fuuko bit back. She really didn't know how else to respond. Perhaps if she shut herself off to everyone, she wouldn't have to experience any of this, complicated emotion.
"Are you trying to be like me?" Tactful Mikagami. Very tactful, he knew exactly which buttons to push.
"What if I said yes?" Fuuko responded bitterly. "What if? I mean. I don't know. Why?" Fuuko rambled on, muttering incoherent words here and there, mostly questions. Mikagami was alarmed. This was nothing like the Fuuko he and the rest of the Hokage knew. What was he supposed to do now? What would Yanagi do? He wished that the other monkeys were present, not him.
"Fuuko."
"What? No 'monkey'?"
"Is this the real you?" Mikagami asked in a very serious tone, catching Fuuko off guard. She flustered. She was not going to crumble in front on him. She was not going to show him her weak side. She was not. . . she was not. . . she was not. . .
"I. . . don't. . . know. . ." Fuuko squeezed the words out of her chest. She couldn't take it anymore. All these emotions, stored up inside her like a over shaken soda can, threatened to erupt.
". . ." Mikagami crossed his arms. Fuuko won't talk. She looks so vulnerable, so lost and confused. What was he to do? All he could think of was to wait. Wait for her reactions.
Suddenly, out of nowhere, Fuuko clutched Mikagami's shirt tightly. She pushed her face against his chest.
"I can't take it anymore" Fuuko choked. "I can't. What am I supposed to do? How can I react in front of everyone else? I . . . I am only allowed to smile"
Mikgami was at a lost for words. It was true, what she said. They were all trapped. He was not allowed to show any emotion and she wasn't allowed to cry. Unconsciously, he slipped one arm around her.
"And I. . . I can do nothing but be emotionless."
Neither one of them knew what to do or say at this moment. They let silence slip in and settle. Oblivious to how much time passed, they just stood there, basking in each other's comfort. Mikagami found solace in Fuuko's similarity to him. Knowing that he wasn't the only one and there was, alas, a monkey who could understand him. Fuuko found consolation in Mikagami's silent support. He knew what she was going through and didn't need to express anything through words. Both, for the first time, felt understood.
Both broke free from each other at the same time. They said nothing, just stared at each other. Mikagami, surprisingly, was the first to break this silence.
"Its 6:30."
"Oh" replied Fuuko.
". . ." Both remained wordless. They knew what each other was hinting at, but no one wanted to be the first to pose the question.
"Have you eaten breakfast yet?" Fuuko asked Mikagami.
". . . no. . ." Mikagami knew what she was getting at, but didn't know whether or no he could go with it. For all he knew, it could be dangerous, he, with the clamed up emotions and her, with the bundle of unknown emotions.
"You want to go pick bananas with me?" Mikagami remained silent. Fuuko flushed as she tried to explain her joke. . . "You know, you always call me a monkey, and I thought monkeys ate nothing but bananas."
"How stupid do you think I am? Of course I know monkeys enjoy bananas." Mikagami retorted quickly but his stomach gave him away, it let out a loud and disgusting grumble.
Fuuko burst out laughing. Mikagami was supposed to be graceful! His stomach wasn't supposed to make funny noises like the rest of the world!
"And I suppose your stomach never makes noise when it needs food. . ." Mikagami's face twitched as he saw Fuuko delight in his moment of embarrassment. Just her type of humor. . .
"I'm hungry as well." Fuuko said, in a matter of fact. "I don't know about you, but I am going to get some breakfast."
"Whatever suits you" Mikagami replied snidely. "Stupid monkey. . . are bananas so appealing this early in the morning?"
"When you're hungry anything goes" Fuuko smirked, "so, you coming or what?" Fuuko turned and headed towards a bakery.
Mikagami never responded to Fuuko's question, he merely followed her silently into the bakery. After careful observation, he handed her a banana shaped toast. He, in turn, received a large fist print across his face. They glanced at each other, half-laughing, surprised that each other's company could be so pleasing.
Today was going to be a different day. The ice has melted a bit and the wind has calmed ever so slightly. Who knew what the rest of the day was going to bring?
AN: how is that? A bit more mushy for all you tofu lovers! Whoo hoo~~. Okay. Thanks for reading, again, I am going to ask for at least 5 reviews before I post up the next chapter. I lied again, I said Mikagami was going to talk to the rest of the Hokage about Seth, but he didn't. I like forgetting about Seth for a while. Thanks for reading, till next time, GOOD LUCK ON FINALS~~~~!!!
Haze: If I reveal to you who Seth is then I will be giving away the very not-mysterious side of this fic. I wish I could tell you though. *grins* Of course Mi-chan will be there to save the day! Perhaps. . .so. . . and Raiha as well? Okay okay. I'll stop being an idiot and shut up. THANKS for reading/reviewing.
Yanagi: Yay! You read my fic again! And you liked it! Whoo hooo~~ my day is getting better by the second. ^_^ I love it when Mi-chan does something funny that he doesn't intend to (I think that happened this chapter – refers to the stomach grumbling incident). Aren't you glad Seth didn't make an appearance in this chapter? I was going to but I got a little bit too tired. Thanks for reading!
GeneWeiss: Another rival is interesting isn't it (especially since this "rival" is a mix between Tokiya and Raiha)? Deducing by logic he should be the choice right? But, sigh, apparently I am a die-hard To/fuu fan (for reasons I can't explain). Oh well. Shoot! Did I give anything away? *grins sheepishly* Thanks for reviewing!
Ranka: I'm glad you like Tofuu (cuz I do too!!). heh. I'll try to keep up the good work and keep people reading this fic. Hopefully this chapter hasn't fallen short of your expectations
Kaze Yurei: *phew* my fic isn't sappy. Thank goodness. I was beginning to think it might swing in that direction. Is this chapter acceptable? I tried my best to keep them in character. I don' know though. . . making Mikagami have emotions (other than anger, annoyance and all that is similar to the above) is a bit hard.
THANKS TO ALL REVIEWERS AND READERS! Hope to keep people interested! Five reviews and the next chapter will be yours! Is this a bit too shameful? Asking for reviews so openly?
