furious angel

chapter one

Jinx me something crazy

Thinking if it's three

Then I'm as smooth as the skin

That rolls across the small of your back

It's too bad it's just not my style

If you need me I'm out,

And on the parkway

Patient and waiting for headlights dressed

In a fashion that's fitting to the

Inconsistencies of my moods

It's times like these when silence means

Everything

It's a campaign on distraction and revisionist history

It's a shame I doubt they'd notice

I doubt they even care

No one is to know about this

Don't let me down

But whatever I have been getting myself into

Lately has been slicing inches from my waist

It's my fist vs. the bottle and that's how bad this could hurt…

…Against I won't feel a thing

No one is to know about this

Don't let me down

We were taught so much better than this…

This is what living like this does…

Thank God you weren't there to watch me hit bottom.

-Ghost Man on Third

Taking Back Sunday

                                                                                                                          *                                        

               "Nymphadora!" called a voice from downstairs. "Nymphadora, this is the third time I've called you, you've got to wake up!" Andromeda Tonks prodded one of the frying egg whites with her wand and watched it sizzle. Smoke rose off the egg and rose into the air, bending itself into graceful, hypnotizing designs before disappearing. She caught herself transfixed for a moment by the delicate patterns and continued prodding the egg with her wand, sliding the Beachwood rod under one of the whites and flipping into the air. It landed back on the frying pan with a slap that disturbed her husband, Ted, from behind the pages of his Daily Prophet. The paper rustled as he craned his neck to see over the top of the paper.

               "Anything interesting in the news, dear?" asked Andromeda as she proceeded to flip the two other whites at once. They landed within a millisecond of each other, landing on the pan next to the third egg. Ted returned to the headlines as she continued cooking breakfast, skimming the articles for anything that might interest his wife. Ted sighed.

               "Some more Muggles in York were killed by a band of rabid Death Eaters," he said, disgust ripping off his teeth. He slammed the paper shut and tossed it onto the table as his wife called once more for their daughter.

               At first Tonks was unable to hear her mother calling, as her face was shoved into her pillow and her ears covered by a thick blanket, but soon she rolled over and was awakened by a combination of the bright sun in her eyes and the promising odors wafting up the stairs. She rolled over again and promptly fell off the bed, dragging her sheets with her. "Ouch!" she said, trying in vain to disentangle herself from the sheets. It took a good five minutes, but soon Tonks was freed from the imprisoning blankets and skidding down the stairs towards breakfast. She slipped on the last step and had to grab for the banister, but she made it into the kitchen without serious injury.

               "Morning, Mum, Dad," she said, plopping herself down in her seat.

               "Eat quickly, Nymphadora," urged Andromeda, "or you'll miss the Express again."

               "You know, I think I've asked you not to call me Nymphadora even more times than I've missed the train to Hogwarts," said Tonks conversationally as she speared the egg white whole on her fork and took a big, very unladylike bite out of it. "Try every morning since the first day of my first year…"

               "I don't understand why you hate you're name so much," said Andromeda as she sat down beside her husband. "It's a perfectly lovely name."

               Tonks did not bother to justify this statement with a retort and continued her campaign to fit the remaining egg white into her mouth at once.

               "Are you all packed, Nym…" Andromeda cut off the question upon the threatening look that she received from her daughter. "Are you all packed?" Tonks shrugged and swallowed the egg in one enormous gulp. "I'm not sending your socks by Owl this year!" she called after Tonks's retreating back.

               Tonks was emptying her sock drawer into her suitcase when her mother walked in. "Oh dear, no," she said, whirling her wand and jabbing it towards the pile of (mostly dirty) socks that, until a moment ago, had been sitting in a heap upon Tonks's Weird Sisters Unite! shirt. The socks folded themselves together and crammed themselves into a relatively neat pile besides Tonks's spare set of robes as Tonks paced around the room, throwing various knick-knacks into her suitcase.

               "Now, if we get one warning owl this year- one, Nymphadora- there will be consequences, young lady," said Andromeda with her hand on her hip.

               "Since when have I ever misbehaved at Hogwarts, mum?" asked Tonks brightly. "I'm a good student"-

               "Let me think a moment, darling, there was that incident with the Dungbomb"-

               "An accident."

               "The bewitched broomstick?"

               "Smith's fault."

               "The exploding cauldron?!"

               "I was framed, Mother! Have a little faith."

               Andromeda sighed and flicked her wand at the suitcase. It squeezed shut and zippered itself. "I expect, then, that there will be no accidents, Smithies, or framings this year, then. It's O.W.L. year, Nymphadora, and expectations- both from me and your father and from your school- will be higher."

               "Really?"

               "Really."

               "Well, I expect there won't be a chance for higher expectations if we don't leave ten minutes ago."

               It took a moment for Andromeda to process what her daughter had just said, but then she glanced at the clock and saw that her daughter was right- they were late for the Hogwarts Express, as they had been for the last three years in a row.

               "GET IN THE CAR!" yelled Andromeda.

               "Gladly," said Tonks, falling down the last three steps.

*

               It took some magic and a lot of luck, but soon Tonks was jumping on to the already moving Hogwarts Express and yelling goodbye to her mother out of the window. Andromeda waved, sighed, and slipped her wand into her robes. "I expect we'll be hearing from you soon," she whispered as she stepped off the platform and into the bustling Muggle station.

*

               "Tonks! You made it!" Keith shouted as Tonks swept a pile of Chocolate Frog cards off the only vacant seat left in the compartment. Keith, Smith, and Greg took up the other seats. Greg, the most intelligent and the least daring of the three boys, already had his thick black Hogwarts robes on and was busy fussing with his Prefects badge. He fumbled to slide the pin through the thick material. Smith grinned and winked and then raised his wand.

               "Accio badge!" said Smith, pointing his wand at his unfortunate friend. The badge soared easily out of Greg's hand and landed neatly in Smith's open palm. "Look at how it shines smartly in the sunlight, Tonks," he said, holding it up to the window and turning it so that the rays of sun glinted off the badge's many-faceted purple and gold face. "It just makes me want to kill it!" Keith laughed as he unfolded his robes from his stuffed trunk and slipped them over his gray T-shirt that advertised his favorite minor-league Quidditch team.

               Greg sighed exasperatedly and tapped his fingers on the windowpane, glaring at Smith. "Ah, lighten up Greg, it's only a badge," said Smith, tossing it into the air. It spun, sending prismatic rays of light around the compartment. He caught it in his hands and threw it up again, but this time he was not so lucky- the badge clattered onto the floor. "Oops," said Smith, diving under the seat to retrieve it. Greg rolled his eyes as he watched Smith's mad search for the badge and turned to Tonks, who had just sat down beside him.

               "So, Nymphadora, this must be Hogwarts history," he said, an uncharacteristic evil grin on his face. "I think you are the only student that has missed the Hogwarts Express every year since her first year," he said. Although she was glad to see that Greg had not lost touch with his humorous streak in the disaster of his "Prefect-tion" she still hated her awful name as much as usual.

               "Don't call me that!" She said as she stood and began to dig through her trunk searching for her own set of robes. She pushed a neatly rolled sock aside. "My mother calls me that."

               "Yes, we know," Keith said "You've told us…many, many times." A barn owl flew across the compartment and perched on his shoulder as he unwrapped another Chocolate Frog and tossed the grimy wrapper into the growing pile of crinkly plastic wrappers that was situated between Keith and the wall of the train. Greg eyed the pile with disgust as he Summoned his badge back from Smith and once again began the seemingly impossible task of fastening the badge to his robes. Tonks held her hand out, taking the badge from her friend.

               "Ravenclaw prefect," Tonks said admiringly as she eyed the golden badge with the purple trimming. The image of the Ravenclaw badger was engraved into the center. She ran her index finger over the smooth lines of the badge and then handed it back to him. "Who would have guessed it?" She said sarcastically as she leaned back in her seat and Summoned a Frog from the pile in front of Keith. Keith then placed a protective arm around his chocolate.

                "So, who's your new partner in crime?" Tonks asked playfully, referring to Greg's prefect partner.

               Greg winced, as if it pained him to think about who he would have to work with for the next year. He sighed exasperatedly and fingered the badge, sliding it through his robes again. "Rachel Laurence," he said as he finally got the clasp shut. "Why couldn't it have been anyone but her…?" he said. "She's become even more of a priss than when I met her. You think I'm bad," he continued, laughing. "That girl has no life besides her grades and annoying people. And then there are her friends! They're even worse! A bunch of bloody pricks if I've ever seen one."

               Smith laughed and grabbed the last Frog from an indignant Keith. "I used to think she was cute. Of course," he said quickly, scrambling to save himself from the horrified looks he was receiving from the other three in the compartment, "that was before I realized that she couldn't take a joke…"

               "Oh, was that when you transfigured her book into a tarantula in the second year?" said Tonks.

               "No, that was"- Greg's answer was interrupted by three booming knocks at the compartment door.

               "Who is it?" hollered Keith from his corner as he attempted to charm open the window and throw the wrappers out of it. Greg was watching him with interest as if to see if his friend was intelligent enough to complete what he was trying to do. The window budged an inch as he door slid open without answer. A tall pale girl with skin white as paper, straight black bangs, and dark gray/blue eyes stood with her long-fingered hand on her hip, glaring at Greg. She tapped her long, pointed red nails silently against her robes and clucked her tongue against her teeth. A badge identical to the one that Greg was wearing gleamed on her robes, as if it had just been polished. "Greg, you were supposed to report to the Prefects Compartment!" she said in an extremely annoying Duh! tone of voice.

               "Hullo, Rachel," said Smith in a friendly tone of voice. He got a glare in return. "I look forward to seeing us beat you in Quidditch!" he said, as if retorting to a silent insult.

               "Shut up, Clemens," said Rachel, calling him by his surname. "I don't expect you'll be good enough to get on the team anyway, so you won't have to worry about that, will you?" She jutted her chin forward, her hair swishing over her shoulder.

               "Yes, Rachel," Keith said sarcastically, "you're so much more talented at Quidditch than us."

               Rachel twirled her wand in her hands as she turned her head to glare at everyone present, as if she couldn't decide whom she was the most pissed at. Keith cowered in mock fear, crushing his pile of still present Chocolate Frog wrappers and causing them to spill all over the floor in a haphazard, chocolaty mess. "Damn," he muttered, pushing them into a pile on the dirty floor with his wand. "Wingardium Leviosa!"  he whispered, sending them all out the window one by one. Rachel opened her mouth to give Keith detention, but Tonks spoke first.  "Why don't you just leave, Rachel?" She suggested. "Greg will be along in a minute."

               "I'm planning on leaving as soon as he"- Rachel pointed to Greg –"Gets his butt out here and comes down to the Prefects Compartment where he's supposed to be. I don't trust him to be able to find it by himself." Keith turned from his wrapper project to stare at Rachel as if he didn't know if he had heard her right.

               "Just leave, Rachel," Tonks said, her voice laden with syrupy kindness. "The Slytherins miss you."

               "Mudblood," Rachel hissed under her breath as she grabbed the sleeve of Greg's robes and dragged him out of the compartment. "Actually, it's one of my parent's that's a Mudblood," Tonks said conversationally as she sent a curse after Rachel as the door shut, feeling satisfied as she heard a terrified scream come from the hallway.

               "Quick, do another spell," hissed Smith under his breath as Rachel screamed again. Smith was all too aware of the uses of the Prior Incantato trick and had learned to always perform a harmless spell after you curse somebody. Tonks thought it was funny how adept Smith was at hiding the evidence, but she had to admit that it did come in handy.

               "Accio book!"  Tonks said. The book soared into her hand as the glass door slid open and a very angry looking Minerva McGonagall looked down at her through her half-spectacles.

*

               "I can't believe you landed yourself in detention on the first day of school!" said Keith as they trudged up to the castle from the horseless carriages. The sky was an angry slate, but it failed to put a damper on the trio's moods. A soft rain began to fall as the students came into the great hall. Tonks shrugged as she turned her head, trying to see the first years on the lake through the haze. The figure of the half-giant groundskeeper, Hagrid, was clearly visible in spite of the increasing drizzle. The, rather pathetic looking fleet of small, canoe-shaped boats glided across the surface of the lake as Tonks, Smith, and Keith sat down at the Gryffindor table. A warm feeling settled over Tonks as she glanced at the golden tableware and then at the cavernous entrance, where the muddy (as usual) first-years were filing in. Tonks grinned.

               "They're so tiny!" remarked a girl sitting a few seats down and on the other side of the table. Her name was Graciela. Her skin was neither pale nor tan; it was a shade that was complemented by her honey-colored, hair. She had oddly dark eyes for someone so fair. It was said that she had the Sight that the Divination professors loved to see in a student. Tonks remembered a time when she had wished to be like Graciela- the beautiful, graceful, swan-like girl was opposite in every way from Tonks. But Tonks had found a comfort zone with her friends and with herself that she was not willing to leave that quickly. She would never be like Graciela, but Graciela would never be like Tonks, either.

               The Sorting passed surprisingly quickly. It usually seemed over-long and drawn out, but the students must have been easy to read this year because they were all sorted in under twenty minutes. When "Zerelson, Zora," was seated at the Hufflepuff table, the headmaster stood. Tonks remembered what her mother had said about Albus Dumbledore- "He is the only wizard You-Know-Who is afraid of. You'll be safer there than anywhere else. I love you, baby," she had said, kissing her on the cheek and sending her off for the first (and for a long time, only) time that she had traveled on the Hogwarts Express. Even though Voldemort had been three years gone, there had been uprisings of Death Eaters against Muggles and the Muggle-Born, and Tonks remembered worrying about being the daughter of a Muggle Born all the way to Hogwarts. Of course, the Chocolate Frogs she ate hadn't helped either…

               "Fifth years will be able to try out for their House Quidditch teams, prefects will have more information…the list of objects forbidden inside the grounds of this school is taped to Filch's door, as usual…Filch asks that no, I repeat, no magic be performed in the hallways…Tuck in!" Food appeared in the golden serving bowls that were lined along the four House tables.

               "Mmm," said Keith, taking Dumbledore's words to heart. "Taste's a bloody lot better than my mum's cooking, I can tell you that!" he said, enthusiastically heaping another towering spoonful of mashed potatoes onto his plate. The potatoes spilled onto his vegetables and seemed to invade the space he had reserved for the chicken he had arranged so carefully on his plate, but it did not seem to bother Keith, as he just drizzled everything with butter.

               "Pass it here!" said Smith happily; reaching out to grab the pitcher of melted butter that Keith had just basically emptied.

               The doors to the Great Hall opened once more, and a tan girl with curly brown hair stomped inside. She had a wide, friendly smile on her face as she explained something to Professor McGonagall and then walked the rest of the way to the Gryffindor table.

               "Hi, Marie," Smith said, offering her the pitcher. Marie took it and set it down next to her plate as she began loading her plate with a little bit of something from every bowl in her immediate vicinity. "Why are you so late?"

               Marie grinned. "I had a bit of a run-in with Snape, but by some miracle I got away without a detention."

               "Ah," Keith said, sticking a broccoli flower in his mouth and licking the dripping liquid butter from his fingers. "Our friend Nymphadora here wasn't so lucky." Marie raised her eyebrows across the table at Tonks as she raised a spoonful of steak and kidney pudding to her lips.

               "What'd you do?" she asked.

                "I cursed Rachel Laurence, she screamed, and McGonagall has to see me in her office tomorrow." Tonks smiled. "It was worth it. I don't know how that girl got out of being put in Slytherin. She looks like a Death Eater."

               "Smells like a Death Eater," Keith put in.

               "Yeah," Smith said. Marie raised her eyebrows.

               "Maybe there's something you don't know about Rachel," she said.

               "Like what?" asked Smith. "You know something?"

               "No," Marie said, sipping from her goblet. "I'm just saying"-

               "Oh, don't get all philosophical and 'feelings-oriented' on us, Marie," said Tonks playfully, knocking her cup over and accidentally spilling her juice onto Keith's potatoes, which was already swimming in butter. He didn't notice the extra flavor as he took another bite. The butter must have overpowered it. He continued eating even as Smith started laughing hysterically and had to dive under the table to hide his face, which was growing redder by the second. Tonks nonchalantly straightened her cup and blotted Keith's potatoes with the sleeve of her robes.

               "Ugh," Marie said, looking incredulously at Keith. "How can he not notice that there is pumpkin juice on his potatoes?"

               "So that's what it is!" said Keith. "I thought these tasted different then before! It's good. Thanks, Tonks."

               "You're welcome, Keith," she replied, drinking from her half-emptied goblet. Marie exhaled and rolled her eyes but didn't say anything. Keith caught the look on Marie's face and grinned at Tonks.

               "You're not like us, Marie," said Keith playfully. "You can't appreciate the subtle flavoring of pumpkin juice and butter"-

               -"The beauty of the softly simmering cauldron"-

               -"The delicate power of liquids that creep through the human veins"-

               -"Bewitching the mind"-

               -"Ensnaring the senses…" Tonks poked the orange-tinted potatoes with her fork. "I guess that's as close to stopper death as we're ever going to get." Smith laughed. They had been making fun of Snape's speech and namely, Snape, since the first day that they had had Potions with the greasy haired slimeball. Tonks wasn't exactly a favorite of Snape's, since she was always either tipping over her cauldron or tipping over someone else's cauldron, and since she was always breaking something she never had time to listen to Snape's instructions or read what he had written on the board. Consequently, Potions was her worst subject, but it was fun since Keith and Smith helped to liven it up while Marie watched on, never taking part but never outwardly disapproving.

               "D'you reckon if Snape touched water, he would shrivel and melt or something?" Keith asked as the food drained from the bowls and dessert appeared.

               "Reckon so," said Smith.

               "He could just wash it off with some oil if he got hit, you know," remarked Marie. Tonks laughed.

               "Are you going to try out for Quidditch?" she asked. Keith and Smith gave her dead imitations of Rachel Laurence's trademark Duh look, and they held it for about three seconds before they started cracking up.

               "Hell, yeah!" said Smith. "I'm going out for Beater. Looks like fun…you could always let go of the bat and aim it for Snape instead of playing…"

               "I think I'm gonna go for Keeper," said Keith. "It starts with the same letter as my name!"

               "Chaser," said Marie. "I think."

               "I dunno what I should do," said Tonks.

               "Be a Beater."

               "Or you could go out for Seeker and change and make yourself look like someone on the opposite team so the other team's Seeker won't clobber you," said Keith excitedly. "It's brilliant!" Smith clapped him on the back and Tonks allowed them to sit there looking pleased with themselves for the rest of the dinner. Finally the food melted back into the plates and the students traipsed together to their dormitory.

               "Who's our prefects?" asked Marie, looking on everyone's robes for the red and gold glint of the Gryffindor badge.

               "Janice Morrow and Ben Caesar," said Smith.

               "How'd you know that?" asked Tonks.

               "Ben sent me an owl," Smith said, shrugging.

               "Oh," Tonks said. She liked Ben, and Janice was a far cry from Rachel Laurence, so she was happy. It could have been worse.

               Janice was standing at the portrait of the Fat Lady, her hand resting on the gilded frame. Her golden eyes flashed in their direction, making sure they were Gryffindors as she swung the portrait away from the wall, revealing the interior of the Gryffindor Tower. "Password's Kennilworthy Whisp," she said as they passed. "Remember that!"

               The Gryffindor Tower looked as warm and inviting as it had every other year that Tonks had had the privilege of entering it (late, mind you.) As the place was full of chairs, it was more klutz-proof than the rest of the castle, where Tonks had had frequent run-ins with coats of armor, Peeves, and the aforementioned cauldrons. She sank into a squashy armchair and put her feet up on the one opposite. Keith than sat on her feet, so she removed them. They sat quietly for a moment, Keith digging through the pockets of his robes, and Tonks going to sleep in the warm armchair. He found a leftover wrapper and threw it into the fire. It melted onto a log as two other Gryffindors took the chairs next to them.

               "It's good to be back," Tonks said. Keith said, "Uumph," which meant "Yes" in Keithish. "I haven't had any major accidents yet," Tonks remarked.

               "Yeah," he agreed sleepily, "The potatoes tasted good."

               "Mmm." Defeated, Tonks pried her eyes open and climbed the stairs to the girls' dormitory. Marie was already in the process of unpacking, energetic as usual. Tonks flipped the catch on her trunk and dug through her belongings, finding the oversized T-shirt and Muggle boxer shorts that she usually wore to bed. She changed and then sat on the bed, squeezing her eyes shut. Although Marie had seen Tonks transform many times before, it was always interesting to watch.

               A second later Tonks had lost the gelled-up spiky 'do that she had come to school with and now had long brown hair that reached to just below her armpits. Tonks often morphed before sleeping, preferring to drift off to whatever dream world she visited with gel-free hair. She lay down on the soft pillow and fell slowly into a deep sleep. She wasn't even awakened by the rocket that someone let off in the common room, which was a pity because that was the kind of thing that she lived off most of the time.

               If she dreamed, she didn't remember any of the dreams in the morning.

*****

Disclaimer- some characters belong to JK, some do not, you know what belongs to me *sobs* its not much, but its something…

I 3 +Oliver+Fred+