What, you may ask, did I feel, as I walked down the empty isle to my husband to be? To this day no one emotion sticks out of my head. A feeling of nausea, grief, distress, terror and loathing all mixed in one was about what I felt.

The Duke had gotten a priest to do it after a large check was handed to him.

"Do you, Gwen Nicole Meire, take this man to be your husband. To love and to cherish through sickness and in health? Do you?"

"I." I could only whisper the first part as tears streamed down my face.

"Do." Concluded the Duke for me. The priest gave him a confused look and pronounced us man and wife. The Duke pulled me into a harsh kiss. Rage flowed within me like I had never felt before. He took a tight grasp on my hand and walked me quickly out of the isle.

When we got home, my dress was already half way torn. Revealing my corset. My daughter's cries were no more, but I could still hear her in my head, crying at the top of her lungs for me to hold her. I later found out that Mary found her and got her to cry herself to sleep.

It seemed the whole night the Duke made love to me. I whimpered Christian's name over and over. I pleaded with the Duke to stop. The physical pain was nothing. But the emotional pain was enough to drive one insane. I woke up with the Duke sleeping soundly next to me. Light shown through the balcony window. I got up quickly but silently pulling on a robe, and walked to Harold and Marie's room, where I assumed Clare was sleeping.

I peered down at her face. On one side I saw a dark bruise on her forehead from when the Duke knocked her over. I lightly touched the tender swollen bump sighing.

"Mummy?" Her eyes opened.

"Yes, love?"

"Why did you leave me?" her voice was cracking, and tears were in her eyes.

"Darling, this isn't the best place to talk. Come, let's get you dressed and we'll go see Christian, okay?" She nodded and threw her arms up for me to hold her. I picked her up and held her little body against mine.

"Mummy, will the Duke take me away from you?" I looked into her face and said,

"No Clare. Nobody will ever take you away from me." I whispered to her. She hugged me close and sighed in my hair.

"Clare, stay our here. I'll be right back with some clothes okay?" I set her down outside my door. She nodded, rubbing her eyes. I quietly opened the door. The Duke was still sleeping soundly. I swiftly yet quietly grabbed a pair of Clare's clothes and some of my own. I also grabbed one of the finest dresses I own to sell for money. I looked into the Dukes pants pocket and found his wallet. I at first started taking out the money, until I put it back in and took the whole god damned thing. I silently crept back out; the duke still sleeping like a baby.

"Alright lets go." We both walked as quietly as we could down the steps. Once there I got Clare dressed and myself too. We put our coats, gloves, and hats on and walked out the door closing it silently behind us. We walked with a sense of urgency. I then realized I had no idea where Christian was staying. If he was in a hotel, an apartment, or if he bought a house here in London. I new I couldn't go to the studio that would be the first place the Duke would look. I knew the second would be the train station but at least there were places where I could hide there until 8:00. And then there was the matter of my marriage to the Duke. I felt sick to my stomach just thinking about being the bride of that horrid man. I looked at the ring that was on my finger and franticly tried to get it off, while walking. It came loose and as soon as it did, I through it out into the streets as hard as I could. I never wanted to set eyes on that ring again, for it was a sign of my binding to the Duke.

We walked hopelessly around the train station, hoping to find Christian. If I only knew where he was staying! I decided to risk going to the studio to see if I could figure anything out. So we headed back to the studio, despite Clare's whines about her feet and legs hurting.

"Mummy there's a note on the door." Clare noticed it before I did. On the studio doors there was a small piece of paper slipped between the two doors.

"Satine love, Your disappearance has greatly displeased me. But luckily I figured out where Christian was before you. If you ever want to see him again, I suggest you go back home right now and I'll give Warner a call to let the boy go. You have until 12:00 A.M. to return to me. Love, Your husband, the Duke." I looked at the time on my watch. 11:55. I only had 5 minutes to get back home.

"Come on Clare!" I grabbed her hand and practically flung her off her feet. I ran as fast as I could with a little girl in tow. The cold winter air stung both our faces, slowing Clare down a bit. Not to mention she hadn't eaten hardly at all that day and she had been on her feet since 7:00 in the morning. I opened the door and flung it shut.

"Duke! If you harm Christian in anyway!." He was sitting in the parlor the phone in hand.

"Hang on Warner." He put the receiver down. "Satine, you are one minute late." He looked at me as if I was a child being punished. "Warner, proceed."

"No! I beg of you! Stop! Please!" I heard a shot on the other end, and then a hard clunk on the floor. I said nothing, but my mouth gaped open in disbelieving shock. I shut my eyes hard and let the tears burn like acid, down my cheek.

"Love, there's no need for tears. The barrier between us has been broken. Never again will Christian haunt you with his words and love songs. So cry not in sadness but in joy, for now nothing is in our way." A rage of passion flowed through me like I had never felt before.

"You bastard! I hope you rot in hell for what you have done to me! You have ruined my life! You've taken away my only love! Your stupid to think that I would love you after everything you have done to me! I have never hated anyone with such a passion, as I have hated you!" I spat the words at him. His face was immobile. I continued. "Even in death my love for Christian remains. And do you see this!?" I waved my hand in front of his face to show my ring-less ring finger. "This is proof that I will never love you!"

"This will all soon pass, darling." I could say no more. Every ounce of physical and emotion energy left my body. All I could do was cry my anger out. My beloved Christian was dead, in some hotel room. I tried to keep myself from imagine him lying on the floor with scarlet blood poring from his body. But the image creeped into my brain.

"No." I said breathing it. All I could do was sink to the floor, hang my head and cry. But my tears were in vain, for they would not bring Christian back.

"Mummy. What's going to happen?" I looked at my child. Her eyes stared at me. Those innocent eyes. what I would give to keep that innocence from being taken away. My jaded eyes, met her veiled innocent ones.

"I don't know, love." I opened my arms to hug her, and she ran into them. I grasped her tightly. I felt her body tremble slightly as her eye's glanced at the Duke. "I won't let anything hurt you." I whispered into her ear. Again she cast a fearful glance at the Duke and laid her head on my shoulder.