Chapter 4: Here comes the bride! Well, she will soon...
Disclaimer: I own squat. Nada. Zilch. But I do own Shinnimegami and Cargii. And I have permission to use A. Nataku, Pansy Gal and Chibi Neko.
And I might warn you- I am fully aware of the 1x2 fics... and I'm disgusted with the authors of those fics. I will send 02 after you, whoever you sick minded simpletons are! I LUV DUO!!!!!!!!
P.S. I AM SHINNIMEGAMI!!!
P.P.S. Yaoi sucks royally. If I see another 1x2 fic, I'll scream. And Chibi Neko will send her boyfriend after you.
And I might as well get some of this straight- The couples. The main one is 2xShinnimegami. (Well, duh!!!!!!) Then we have 1xNeko, 4xPansy, 5xNataku, Squall x Rinoa, Irvine x Selphie, Darien x Moon, Uranus x Neptune (STARS!!!! THINK SAILOR STARS!!!) and the minors, 4x Cargii (THAT'S JUST WRONG!!!), Luna x Artemis and Darien x Mars
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Previously on The Great Debate:
Quistis: Eeeeeaaaaaaahhhhhh.... get off, you fat lump!
Shinnimegami: FAT LUMP?!?!?!
Rinoa: That's whatcha get for calling me a prissy-ass!
Pansy Gal: You deserved it
Squall: I'd appreciate it if you don't talk to my future wife like that, thanks
Shinnimegami: WHAT?!?!? SHE'S GONNA BE MY SISTER-IN-LAW?!?!?!?! Oh, the insanity...
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
(AN This chapter is set 2 year into the future. Don't ask why. I felt like doing something crazy. I am insane, after all!)
*The whole gang is around the pool at Quatre's house. It's bigger than an Olympic sized pool. Shinnimegami and Duo are bomb-diving, Serena and Selphie are being idiotic as per usual (I'm surprised Selphie's not blonde), Heero is leering at his gun, Relena and Chibi Neko are leering at Heero (Why Relena's there, I do NOT know), Hotaru's harassing Amara, Michelle's trying to save Amara, Lita's arranging food, Wufei's polishing his katana, A. Nataku is practising her Kung Fu, Rinoa's flirting with Squall, Quistis is reading, Squall's ignoring everyone, Mariemeia's disappeared somewhere, Trista's applying lipstick, Trowa's prowling around like a tiger, Raye and Mina are chatting about boys (the name Seifer is mentioned a few times), Amy's using her mini laptop, the cats are sleeping, Rini and Chibi Cosmos are playing, Zell's punching a wall, Irvine's pretending his hand is a gun and continuously mutters "BANG", Edea's gone home with Seifer and Elle, and Quatre and Pansy Gal are trying to uphold peace (Sounding a lot like Relena in the process).
Shinnimegami: Messiah of all belly-whackers!!!!! *Bombs and sprays water on everyone*
Squall: SIS, STOP IT!!!
Wufei: Yeah baka onna!!!!
Shinnimegami: Bungu!!!!
*Splash*
*Pansy Gal walks outside with a towel*
Pansy Gal: I'm not sure Quackie's gonna be happy if he comes outside and sees all the water everywhere but in the pool.
Duo: Well fuck
Shinnimegami: It's not our problem *Nods at Duo, both bomb in at the same time*
Chibi Neko: *Stops trying to flirt with Heero* TIDAL WAVE!!!!
Amy: MERCURY ICE STORM BLAST!!! *water turns to ice with the attack*
Squall: Aura! *Pushes the ice to the pool* Heh... superhuman strength, gotta love it!
Raye: MARS FLAME SHOOTER!!! *Melts the ice, all of it returns to the pool*
Shinnimegami: Smart asses. I could've done that myself.
*Everyone stops and looks at Shinnimegami. then they all realise she's wearing a skimpy bikini that could easily fit into a contact lens case*
Duo: Wow. *whistles*
*Then Shinnimegami ruins it all by putting on a pair of black and purple boardshorts*
Duo: Hell, fuck, shit, damn!!!!
*Obviously Duo likes seeing Shinnimegami in the skimpy bikini. Hentai, very Hentai!!!*
Shinnimegami: Poor bubba! *Pounces onto Duo*
Fujin: RAGE!!!!!!!
Rinoa: INSANITY!!!!
Wufei: INJUSTICE!!!!!
Fujin/ Rinoa/ Wufei: WHAT THE?!!?!?!
Zell: .... The hell?
Squall: That line is so old
Zell: But it's mine!
*Milliardo and Noin enter, both very happy (Partially because Noin's carrying a drool bucket from being around Rel's brother for too long)*
Shinnimegami: I don't get it. How can Milliardo be cool, and Relena can't?
Heero: Coz Relena's a pacifism fuckwit thing.
Shinnimegami: True 'nuff
*Enters Zone and Watts*
Rinoa: Buddies!!! *Hugs the two newcomers*
Zone: Happy birthday, My Sorceress *Hands Rinoa a present*
Watts: Heya! Happy Birthday Rinny!
Rinoa: *is close to tears of joy, giggles hysterically* THANK YOU SWEETIES!!!!!!!!
Zone/ Watts: No prob! *Blow kisses, leave*
Pansy Gal: Now how did they get here?
Rinoa: Uh. heh heh heh. *Waves a set of keys*
Chibi Neko: Is it really your birthday today?
Rinoa: Nup. Tomorrow. Zone and Watts are gonna go help the White SeeD's with Elle. So sweet of 'em!
Shinnimegami: I'm bored. *Yawns*
*Quatre walks out with a few butlers following. and about half the Maganacs*
Duo: We're going to the lounge room *Indicates the now half sleeping girl on his back*
Quatre: No making out, ok?
Duo: And you thought I was Hentai. sheesh *Carries Shinnimegami inside*
Pansy Gal/ Chibi Neko: Any minute now. aaaaaany minute.
Minutes: 15 of me pass! *15 minutes pass*
*Chibi Neko, A. Nataku, Pansy Gal and the remaining 4 pilots tiptoe inside to catch a glimpse of what's happening. no fireworks, people! I'm not that kind of author!*
*Duo is holding Shinnimegami, and both of them are asleep. such a sweet moment. awwwwwwwwww!!!!*
Pansy Gal: I guess Bombing really takes it outta you.
Chibi Neko: Hai.
A. Nataku: Exactly how many times did they hit their heads instead of the water?
Chibi Neko: I don't think they did, Alex
A. Nataku: Shut up, Kath
*Chibi Neko and A. Nataku bare their teeth and hiss at each other. They both look veeeeery pissed off*
Pansy Gal: Both of you shut up!
Quatre: Ez, I don't think that's going to help. Let them fight and get it out of their systems, ok?
Pansy Gal: Oh, fine. *Whispers* Catfight! Catfight!
*Chibi Neko and A. Nataku go at it like a pack of hungry cats (Thus the term Cat-fight) and claw at each others backs*
Trowa: Take it outside, ladies
Serena: *Yelling from outside* WE NEED MORE FOOD!!!
*A scream is heard from outside. Its seems when Chibi Neko and A. Nataku started fighting outside, Hotaru got caught up in it*
Hotaru: *Screaming from outside* MAMMA!! DADDY!!! HEEEEEEELLLPPPP!!!
*Hotaru runs inside screaming her head off with a box of tissues under her arm*
Pansy Gal: 'Taru, go to Aunty Amara. Mommy and Daddy are asleep.
Hotaru: Then wake them up, please
Quatre: Why don't you do it then?
Hotaru: I despise physical exertion
Heero: True 'nuff
Wufei: Urgh..
Raye: *From outside* Oh buuuuuuuutler!!!!!
Quatre: Someone call Rashid..... *Sweatdrop*
Pansy Gal: OKIDAY!!! *Runs upstairs* RAAAAAAASHIIIIIDD!!!!!!
*The lead Maganac (apart from Q-man) walks down and glares at the unaware blonde girl clinging onto Quatre*
Quatre: Her, um. royal hineeness needs some attention
Raye: AND FOOD!!!
Serena: DON'T FORGET THE FOOD! I'M STARVING!!!!
Raye: Shut up you bakayaro!!!!!!
Lita: Lunch is on!
Serena/ the cats/ Rini/ Hotaru/ Raye: Yay!!!!!! *All run to the buffet table*
Diana: Chicken?
Selphie: Heh heh heh. It's all MINE!!!!!!! *Pounces onto the buffet table*
Minutes: 35 of me pass! *35 minutes pass*
*Serena is lying down after eating too much and doing a great impression of a beached whale while she's at it, Raye's looking for the aspirin, Rini's bugging her parents for something to make her feel better, Selphie's snoring loudly, the cats are cleaning themselves and Hotaru is using the cold cuts as target practise for her glaive (And she said she hates physical exertion. sheesh! Hypochondriac!! Well, it does run in the family.)*
Pansy Gal: Well, I guess nothings gonna happen. let's go outside.
*The pilots and the smart blonde walk outside, leaving the two death people inside*
Shinnimegami: *Pops an eye open* Coast is clear
Duo: Time to raid the fridge
Shinnimegami: You read my mind!
*Both of them run into the kitchen and start pulling chocolate, coke, dr. pepper and mars bars out of the fridge and chow down. And looking so kawaii while they're at it. But then, Duo's always kawaii! WHERE'S MY DROOL BUCKET?!?!?!*
Hotaru: *From outside* Mommeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!
Shinnimegami: SHIT!! RUN!!!!!!!
*The two death people run back to the lounge room and pretend to be asleep again*
Shinnimegami: *ZZZZZ*
*Enters the Chibi-Goddess of Life, Death, Rebirth and Destruction. in tears.*
Hotaru: I know you can't hear me right now. and I'll put you through my mindless chatter later. but. RAYE WAS MEAN TO ME!!!!
Shinnimegami: *ZZZZZ*
Hotaru: Wait a minute! Saturn Planet Power! *Becomes Sailor Saturn*
Saturn: DIE, MARS!!!!!!!!!! *Runs outside with her glaive held high.*
*Eerie slasher music plays as Raye transforms into Sailor Mars and duels againsed Saturn with a flaming bow and arrow*
Saturn: I may be 14, but I WILL KILL YOU!!!!!!
*Back inside.*
Duo: ...
Shinnimegami: ?!?!?!?!
Duo/ Shinnimegami: SHE WAS NAKED!!!!!!!
Shinnimegami: I'm not fussed. She is my daughter after all.
Duo: Er... Our daughter, you mean..
Shinnimegami: Whatever. just as long as Dr. Tomoe's dead, then I'm happy. ALL HAIL THE FUTURE MAXWELL FAMILY!!!
Duo: But you're still a Stouffers
Shinnimegami: That's why I said FUTURE!!!!!
Duo: *Light bulb appears over his head, and a biiiiiig evil-looking grin appears* I just had an Idea!
Shinnimegami: *Pulls out a notebook and a pen, flips the page to the appropriate date* Today was a great day for Duo! He had an idea! It's a revolution!
Duo: HEY!!!!
Shinnimegami: Sorry.
Duo: *Runs upstairs, then back down again* Looky! *Flashes a credit card with the name 'Quatre Raberba Winner' on it*
Shinnimegami: You stole sugar buns card?!
Duo: Borrowed.
Shinnimegami: Right. to the mall! But first.
Duo/ Shinnimegami: WE NEED A SHOWER!!!!
Duo: Chlorine stinks
Shinnimegami: We're not here to advertise chlorine, sweety
Duo: But I wanna advertise something! *Pouts*
Shinnimegami: Ok. advertise a chocolate bar at the mall and I'll give you a lollypop to make you feel better
Duo: *Jumps up and down* YAY!!!!
Shinnimegami: I bagsie first in the shower!
Duo: I got another idea.
Shinnimegami: As much as I despise Hentai. oh no. not that!
Duo: Yup
Shinnimegami: *Stares wide-eyed* But.
Duo: Chickenin' out on me?
Shinnimegami: NO!!!
Duo: You're acting as if you just found out that I. erm. have a. thing. for anything Hentai.
Shinnimegami: I guess there's a first time for everything.
*Both run to the shower. yes, this makes up for the fireworks earlier!*
*Back outside.*
Serena: I'm still hungry!
Darien: You've eaten through the house. No more
Serena: But-
Darien: NO MORE
Serena: Take my fun, why don't you?
Diana: Highnesses-
Serena/ Darien: WHAT?!?!
Diana: *Miaows cutely, pounces onto Darien's lap* You shouldn't fight. How are you supposed to rule Crystal Tokyo if you're always arguing?
Luna: A relationship isn't complete without arguments, hunny
Artemis: We all know that, don't we?
Hotaru: *Has de-transformed, runs across with a sign saying 'New Debate Topic* And the topic is. Relationships need arguments to survive!!!! I'll tell mommy! *Runs inside. to see her parents gone* MO- MMEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!
*Upstairs.*
Shinnimegami: SHIT!!!!
*The two deathies get dressed and escape through the window*
*Street.*
Duo: Freedom!
*Mobile with the White Reflection ringtone goes off*
Shinnimegami: *Looks at the screen which displays the name 'Hotaru's Mobile'* Fuck. *Answers with a crackly-ish voice to make it sound like a voicemail* Hi! You've reached the Goddess of Death's mobile! I can't take your call right now, but if you'll leave a name and number, I'll get back to you a.s.a.p.! *Presses the 2 key (Ironic, ne? I am that obsessed)*
Hotaru's voice: Mommy, it's me!!! The new debate topic is 'Relationships need arguments to survive'. Ring back when you get this message *Hangs up*
Shinnimegami: Phew! That was close.
Duo: Remind me again why we're running away from 'Taru?
Shinnimegami: *Whacks Duo across the back of his head* Gee, I wonder.
Duo: ITAI!!!!
Shinnimegami: YOU WERE GONNA TAKE ME SHOPPING!!!!!!
Duo: Oh, right!
Shinnimegami: I give up. *Sweatdrop*
*Back at Quat-dudes' mansion.*
Amara: . on the affirmative we have Serena, Darien, Mina and Lita. On the negative we have Raye, Wufei, Quistis and Irvine. I am your chairperson!
Michelle: WOOOOHOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! GO URANUS!!!!
Diana: Go highnesses!!!
A. Nataku: Go Lita, Sis and Wufei!!! *Gets a glare from both teams*
Pansy Gal: Go SIS!!!!
Mina: I shall win for the sake of the Aino family!!!
Pansy Gal: Yay! You're my favourite sister!
Chibi Neko: What? Jens' a pain in the ass already?
Pansy Gal: Yup
Mina: What was the topic again?
Amara: UURRRAAAAAAAGGGHHHH!!!!!! *Rams a frying pan into Mina's head and sits back down*
Mina: OWCHNESS!!!!
Serena: *Laughs hysterically, happily rolls on the ground and straight into the pool*
*Shopping Mall.*
Shinnimegami: $1000000 down, $7000000 to go!
Duo: What are you doing?
Shinnimegami: Binge shopping! *Giggles*
Duo: .*v . v' sweatdrop*
*Kitty-Quat's place.*
Serena: .And if I had a cent for every time Mamo-chan and I have fought, I'd be richer than Quatre. Then again, I am the PRINCESS OF THE MOON AND NEO-QUEEN OF FUTURE CRYSTAL TOKYO!!!!! So, you see, a stable relationship requires arguments to balance it all out!
Amara: Er... Thanks, Usa-chan
Serena: No problemo!
Amara: Baka-hime. ok! Raye, time to take the reigns!
Raye: I- *Goes for a dramatic pause*
Audience: *Moves closer*
Raye: Am not a love doctor, though I still am trying to steal Mamo-chan! Therefore, I'M LEAVING!!!
Audience: *Stares as the Princess of Mars storms off inside to harass the Goddess of Death . who isn't there*
Amara: .
Wufei: Baka onna
Amara: And now, it's Darien! PS FUCK YOU, MAMORU!!!
Darien: Fuck you too, Tenoh
Amara: Hurry the hell up!
Darien: *Blabbers on with the topic. for an hour*
*Shopping Mall.*
*Shinnimegami is sitting in a chair, and Duo is kneeling in front of her, holding one of her hands... it seems that. aw fuck it. Find out for yourselves. All I'm telling you is that instead of a diamond ring, there's a burger ring*
Shinnimegami: *Is in tears of joy*
Duo: Well?
Shinnimegami: *Thinks for a moment* Yes
*Duo stands up and drags Shinnimegami back to the food hall*
*Territory of Cuteness.*
Pansy Gal: Has it concerned anyone that the deathies aren't here?
Quatre: Um. *Walks inside and walks back out again* You're right!
A. Nataku: *Is for some reason sitting in Wufei's lap* No shit, Sherlock
Heero: Knowing 02, they're at the pub
Chibi Neko: Knowing Ants, they're at the mall.
Pansy Gal/ Chibi Neko/ A. Nataku: OH MY GOD!!!!!!
Chibi Neko: BINGE SHOPPING! Poor Duo.
A. Nataku: Hmm. torture. coolness!
Pansy Gal: Alex, I question your sanity
A. Nataku: What about my sanity? Is it broken?
Pansy Gal: *Sad voice* I think so
Michelle: New debate topic! Nataku's sani-
A. Nataku: Neptune, I will destroy you
Michelle: Sorry! *Hides behind Amara*
Chibi Neko: Hmm. sanity. wow
Heero: Suicide!
Chibi Neko/ Heero: Have Gundam, will blow up! WOO HOO!!!!!!
*Shopping Mall.*
*The two deathies are in a store that selling cd's really cheap. But they're good cd's!!*
Shinnimegami: *Is looking through the 'L' section* Goddamn, where is it?!?!
Duo: Whatcha lookin' for?
Shinnimegami: Linkin Park. The one with the imitation Altron Gundam on the cover
Duo: Who'd buy anything with Wu-man's Gundam on it? It's insane!!!
Shinnimegami: Hai.
Duo: Here it is! *Holds up the album*
(AN Yes, I know it's sad that I don't have the Linkin Park album yet. I'm still saving up for a Playstation 2! I wanna play Final Fantasy 10!!!)
Shinnimegami: *Yanks the cd away* Mai-yan!!! *Puts it into the weird cd player thing and listens* Fina- fucking- ly!
Duo: You don't come here very often, do you?
Shinnimegami: *Raspberry* Of course I do! *Sings*
Crawling in my skin
These wounds that will not heal
This is how I fall
Confusing what is real.
Duo: You have a nice voice
Shinnimegami: *Stops the cd* 4 years of choir through high school, singing whenever my favorite songs come on the radio, no duh!
Duo: *Dr. Evil voice* Riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight. I take it you were one of very few girls in the choir?
Shinnimegami: One of 100 girls. I went to an all-girl school. There I met Alex, Erin and Kathrine, otherwise known as A. Nataku, Pansy Gal and Chibi Neko
Duo: One question. If you're the self proclaimed Goddess of Death, what does that make the other 3?
Shinnimegami: Um. Alex is the Goddess of War, Erin's the Goddess of Life and I think Kath's the Goddess of Cats and Suicide or Chaos or something like that
Duo: Right. I'll remember that
Shinnimegami: You do that! *Pays for the album* Everyone's probably wondering where we are. We better go now
Duo: You haven't bought the mall yet!
*House of the Almighty Cute Blonde.*
Minutes: 30 of me pass! *30 minutes pass*
*Shinnimegami re-enters and a very bemused Duo follows*
Chibi Neko: Uh oh. what did you do to the poor guy!!!!
Shinnimegami: Well, lets see.. We went shopping, did more shopping, and, oh, whaddaya know! Even more shopping!!!!!
*The four author-friends; Shinnimegami, Pansy Gal, Chibi Neko and A. Nataku huddle*
Chibi Neko: Well? Wassup?
Shinnimegami: December, Bali, bridesmaids!!!!!
Chibi Neko/ Pansy Gal/ A. Nataku: WHAT?!?!?!?
Shinnimegami: *Flashes a really expensive looking ring* Well, Duo borrowed a couple of million dollars off Q-man and. um.
Pansy Gal: You bitch! Stealing money off my hubbie!!!
Shinnimegami: It wasn't stealing! It was permanently borrowing!
A. Nataku: What's happening? I can't take the suspense!!!!
Shinnimegami: It's decided. The day after my birthday, which shall be the 9th, you 3 are gonna be bridesmaids at MY WEDDING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Chibi Neko/ Pansy Gal/ A. Nataku: HE PROPOSED TO YOU?!?!?!?
Shinnimegami: Keep it down! It's a surprise!
Chibi Neko: What color do we have to wear?
Shinnimegami: HE ONLY PROPOSED TODAY YOU JACKASSES!!!!!
A. Nataku: I don't think they heard you on Pluto
Trista: Yes?
Shinnimegami: Not you, the planet, Luna P!
Trista: I AM the planet!
Rinoa: Right.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ On the next chapter:
Shinnimegami: And in conclusion, Gauntlet Legends, Soul Calibur, Crazy Taxi and Sonic Adventures are the best Dreamcast games!
Duo: Hmm. Video games!
Shinnimegami: The thought of staring at a tv screen for hours on end.
Duo/ Shinnimegami: AWSOME!!!
Pansy Gal: You're lucky you have a Dreamcast, Ants
Shinnimegami: It's not mine. It's Adrian's. And besides, you have a Gamecube
Quatre: I prefer Nintendo 64
Pansy Gal: Pokemon Stadium 1 and 2!!!
Shinnimegami: *Screams* Ahh! The eternally painful game!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Blah blah blah. The same shit over again.
Endnotes:
Heck, the only song I put in was sung by yours truly.
Krawling, sung by Shinnimegami, originally performed by Linkin Park.
Peeps, you can expect Shinnimegami to sing In The End as well in the next chapter!
If you want to request something (or suggest), or be evil and send flamers, send them to shinnimegami@hotmail.com and I might consider your ideas. If I do, however, choose yours, I will acknowledge you in the next chapters. Be sure to leave your ff.net i.d. otherwise I can't acknowledge you.
Disclaimer: I own squat. Nada. Zilch. But I do own Shinnimegami and Cargii. And I have permission to use A. Nataku, Pansy Gal and Chibi Neko.
And I might warn you- I am fully aware of the 1x2 fics... and I'm disgusted with the authors of those fics. I will send 02 after you, whoever you sick minded simpletons are! I LUV DUO!!!!!!!!
P.S. I AM SHINNIMEGAMI!!!
P.P.S. Yaoi sucks royally. If I see another 1x2 fic, I'll scream. And Chibi Neko will send her boyfriend after you.
And I might as well get some of this straight- The couples. The main one is 2xShinnimegami. (Well, duh!!!!!!) Then we have 1xNeko, 4xPansy, 5xNataku, Squall x Rinoa, Irvine x Selphie, Darien x Moon, Uranus x Neptune (STARS!!!! THINK SAILOR STARS!!!) and the minors, 4x Cargii (THAT'S JUST WRONG!!!), Luna x Artemis and Darien x Mars
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Previously on The Great Debate:
Quistis: Eeeeeaaaaaaahhhhhh.... get off, you fat lump!
Shinnimegami: FAT LUMP?!?!?!
Rinoa: That's whatcha get for calling me a prissy-ass!
Pansy Gal: You deserved it
Squall: I'd appreciate it if you don't talk to my future wife like that, thanks
Shinnimegami: WHAT?!?!? SHE'S GONNA BE MY SISTER-IN-LAW?!?!?!?! Oh, the insanity...
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
(AN This chapter is set 2 year into the future. Don't ask why. I felt like doing something crazy. I am insane, after all!)
*The whole gang is around the pool at Quatre's house. It's bigger than an Olympic sized pool. Shinnimegami and Duo are bomb-diving, Serena and Selphie are being idiotic as per usual (I'm surprised Selphie's not blonde), Heero is leering at his gun, Relena and Chibi Neko are leering at Heero (Why Relena's there, I do NOT know), Hotaru's harassing Amara, Michelle's trying to save Amara, Lita's arranging food, Wufei's polishing his katana, A. Nataku is practising her Kung Fu, Rinoa's flirting with Squall, Quistis is reading, Squall's ignoring everyone, Mariemeia's disappeared somewhere, Trista's applying lipstick, Trowa's prowling around like a tiger, Raye and Mina are chatting about boys (the name Seifer is mentioned a few times), Amy's using her mini laptop, the cats are sleeping, Rini and Chibi Cosmos are playing, Zell's punching a wall, Irvine's pretending his hand is a gun and continuously mutters "BANG", Edea's gone home with Seifer and Elle, and Quatre and Pansy Gal are trying to uphold peace (Sounding a lot like Relena in the process).
Shinnimegami: Messiah of all belly-whackers!!!!! *Bombs and sprays water on everyone*
Squall: SIS, STOP IT!!!
Wufei: Yeah baka onna!!!!
Shinnimegami: Bungu!!!!
*Splash*
*Pansy Gal walks outside with a towel*
Pansy Gal: I'm not sure Quackie's gonna be happy if he comes outside and sees all the water everywhere but in the pool.
Duo: Well fuck
Shinnimegami: It's not our problem *Nods at Duo, both bomb in at the same time*
Chibi Neko: *Stops trying to flirt with Heero* TIDAL WAVE!!!!
Amy: MERCURY ICE STORM BLAST!!! *water turns to ice with the attack*
Squall: Aura! *Pushes the ice to the pool* Heh... superhuman strength, gotta love it!
Raye: MARS FLAME SHOOTER!!! *Melts the ice, all of it returns to the pool*
Shinnimegami: Smart asses. I could've done that myself.
*Everyone stops and looks at Shinnimegami. then they all realise she's wearing a skimpy bikini that could easily fit into a contact lens case*
Duo: Wow. *whistles*
*Then Shinnimegami ruins it all by putting on a pair of black and purple boardshorts*
Duo: Hell, fuck, shit, damn!!!!
*Obviously Duo likes seeing Shinnimegami in the skimpy bikini. Hentai, very Hentai!!!*
Shinnimegami: Poor bubba! *Pounces onto Duo*
Fujin: RAGE!!!!!!!
Rinoa: INSANITY!!!!
Wufei: INJUSTICE!!!!!
Fujin/ Rinoa/ Wufei: WHAT THE?!!?!?!
Zell: .... The hell?
Squall: That line is so old
Zell: But it's mine!
*Milliardo and Noin enter, both very happy (Partially because Noin's carrying a drool bucket from being around Rel's brother for too long)*
Shinnimegami: I don't get it. How can Milliardo be cool, and Relena can't?
Heero: Coz Relena's a pacifism fuckwit thing.
Shinnimegami: True 'nuff
*Enters Zone and Watts*
Rinoa: Buddies!!! *Hugs the two newcomers*
Zone: Happy birthday, My Sorceress *Hands Rinoa a present*
Watts: Heya! Happy Birthday Rinny!
Rinoa: *is close to tears of joy, giggles hysterically* THANK YOU SWEETIES!!!!!!!!
Zone/ Watts: No prob! *Blow kisses, leave*
Pansy Gal: Now how did they get here?
Rinoa: Uh. heh heh heh. *Waves a set of keys*
Chibi Neko: Is it really your birthday today?
Rinoa: Nup. Tomorrow. Zone and Watts are gonna go help the White SeeD's with Elle. So sweet of 'em!
Shinnimegami: I'm bored. *Yawns*
*Quatre walks out with a few butlers following. and about half the Maganacs*
Duo: We're going to the lounge room *Indicates the now half sleeping girl on his back*
Quatre: No making out, ok?
Duo: And you thought I was Hentai. sheesh *Carries Shinnimegami inside*
Pansy Gal/ Chibi Neko: Any minute now. aaaaaany minute.
Minutes: 15 of me pass! *15 minutes pass*
*Chibi Neko, A. Nataku, Pansy Gal and the remaining 4 pilots tiptoe inside to catch a glimpse of what's happening. no fireworks, people! I'm not that kind of author!*
*Duo is holding Shinnimegami, and both of them are asleep. such a sweet moment. awwwwwwwwww!!!!*
Pansy Gal: I guess Bombing really takes it outta you.
Chibi Neko: Hai.
A. Nataku: Exactly how many times did they hit their heads instead of the water?
Chibi Neko: I don't think they did, Alex
A. Nataku: Shut up, Kath
*Chibi Neko and A. Nataku bare their teeth and hiss at each other. They both look veeeeery pissed off*
Pansy Gal: Both of you shut up!
Quatre: Ez, I don't think that's going to help. Let them fight and get it out of their systems, ok?
Pansy Gal: Oh, fine. *Whispers* Catfight! Catfight!
*Chibi Neko and A. Nataku go at it like a pack of hungry cats (Thus the term Cat-fight) and claw at each others backs*
Trowa: Take it outside, ladies
Serena: *Yelling from outside* WE NEED MORE FOOD!!!
*A scream is heard from outside. Its seems when Chibi Neko and A. Nataku started fighting outside, Hotaru got caught up in it*
Hotaru: *Screaming from outside* MAMMA!! DADDY!!! HEEEEEEELLLPPPP!!!
*Hotaru runs inside screaming her head off with a box of tissues under her arm*
Pansy Gal: 'Taru, go to Aunty Amara. Mommy and Daddy are asleep.
Hotaru: Then wake them up, please
Quatre: Why don't you do it then?
Hotaru: I despise physical exertion
Heero: True 'nuff
Wufei: Urgh..
Raye: *From outside* Oh buuuuuuuutler!!!!!
Quatre: Someone call Rashid..... *Sweatdrop*
Pansy Gal: OKIDAY!!! *Runs upstairs* RAAAAAAASHIIIIIDD!!!!!!
*The lead Maganac (apart from Q-man) walks down and glares at the unaware blonde girl clinging onto Quatre*
Quatre: Her, um. royal hineeness needs some attention
Raye: AND FOOD!!!
Serena: DON'T FORGET THE FOOD! I'M STARVING!!!!
Raye: Shut up you bakayaro!!!!!!
Lita: Lunch is on!
Serena/ the cats/ Rini/ Hotaru/ Raye: Yay!!!!!! *All run to the buffet table*
Diana: Chicken?
Selphie: Heh heh heh. It's all MINE!!!!!!! *Pounces onto the buffet table*
Minutes: 35 of me pass! *35 minutes pass*
*Serena is lying down after eating too much and doing a great impression of a beached whale while she's at it, Raye's looking for the aspirin, Rini's bugging her parents for something to make her feel better, Selphie's snoring loudly, the cats are cleaning themselves and Hotaru is using the cold cuts as target practise for her glaive (And she said she hates physical exertion. sheesh! Hypochondriac!! Well, it does run in the family.)*
Pansy Gal: Well, I guess nothings gonna happen. let's go outside.
*The pilots and the smart blonde walk outside, leaving the two death people inside*
Shinnimegami: *Pops an eye open* Coast is clear
Duo: Time to raid the fridge
Shinnimegami: You read my mind!
*Both of them run into the kitchen and start pulling chocolate, coke, dr. pepper and mars bars out of the fridge and chow down. And looking so kawaii while they're at it. But then, Duo's always kawaii! WHERE'S MY DROOL BUCKET?!?!?!*
Hotaru: *From outside* Mommeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!
Shinnimegami: SHIT!! RUN!!!!!!!
*The two death people run back to the lounge room and pretend to be asleep again*
Shinnimegami: *ZZZZZ*
*Enters the Chibi-Goddess of Life, Death, Rebirth and Destruction. in tears.*
Hotaru: I know you can't hear me right now. and I'll put you through my mindless chatter later. but. RAYE WAS MEAN TO ME!!!!
Shinnimegami: *ZZZZZ*
Hotaru: Wait a minute! Saturn Planet Power! *Becomes Sailor Saturn*
Saturn: DIE, MARS!!!!!!!!!! *Runs outside with her glaive held high.*
*Eerie slasher music plays as Raye transforms into Sailor Mars and duels againsed Saturn with a flaming bow and arrow*
Saturn: I may be 14, but I WILL KILL YOU!!!!!!
*Back inside.*
Duo: ...
Shinnimegami: ?!?!?!?!
Duo/ Shinnimegami: SHE WAS NAKED!!!!!!!
Shinnimegami: I'm not fussed. She is my daughter after all.
Duo: Er... Our daughter, you mean..
Shinnimegami: Whatever. just as long as Dr. Tomoe's dead, then I'm happy. ALL HAIL THE FUTURE MAXWELL FAMILY!!!
Duo: But you're still a Stouffers
Shinnimegami: That's why I said FUTURE!!!!!
Duo: *Light bulb appears over his head, and a biiiiiig evil-looking grin appears* I just had an Idea!
Shinnimegami: *Pulls out a notebook and a pen, flips the page to the appropriate date* Today was a great day for Duo! He had an idea! It's a revolution!
Duo: HEY!!!!
Shinnimegami: Sorry.
Duo: *Runs upstairs, then back down again* Looky! *Flashes a credit card with the name 'Quatre Raberba Winner' on it*
Shinnimegami: You stole sugar buns card?!
Duo: Borrowed.
Shinnimegami: Right. to the mall! But first.
Duo/ Shinnimegami: WE NEED A SHOWER!!!!
Duo: Chlorine stinks
Shinnimegami: We're not here to advertise chlorine, sweety
Duo: But I wanna advertise something! *Pouts*
Shinnimegami: Ok. advertise a chocolate bar at the mall and I'll give you a lollypop to make you feel better
Duo: *Jumps up and down* YAY!!!!
Shinnimegami: I bagsie first in the shower!
Duo: I got another idea.
Shinnimegami: As much as I despise Hentai. oh no. not that!
Duo: Yup
Shinnimegami: *Stares wide-eyed* But.
Duo: Chickenin' out on me?
Shinnimegami: NO!!!
Duo: You're acting as if you just found out that I. erm. have a. thing. for anything Hentai.
Shinnimegami: I guess there's a first time for everything.
*Both run to the shower. yes, this makes up for the fireworks earlier!*
*Back outside.*
Serena: I'm still hungry!
Darien: You've eaten through the house. No more
Serena: But-
Darien: NO MORE
Serena: Take my fun, why don't you?
Diana: Highnesses-
Serena/ Darien: WHAT?!?!
Diana: *Miaows cutely, pounces onto Darien's lap* You shouldn't fight. How are you supposed to rule Crystal Tokyo if you're always arguing?
Luna: A relationship isn't complete without arguments, hunny
Artemis: We all know that, don't we?
Hotaru: *Has de-transformed, runs across with a sign saying 'New Debate Topic* And the topic is. Relationships need arguments to survive!!!! I'll tell mommy! *Runs inside. to see her parents gone* MO- MMEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!
*Upstairs.*
Shinnimegami: SHIT!!!!
*The two deathies get dressed and escape through the window*
*Street.*
Duo: Freedom!
*Mobile with the White Reflection ringtone goes off*
Shinnimegami: *Looks at the screen which displays the name 'Hotaru's Mobile'* Fuck. *Answers with a crackly-ish voice to make it sound like a voicemail* Hi! You've reached the Goddess of Death's mobile! I can't take your call right now, but if you'll leave a name and number, I'll get back to you a.s.a.p.! *Presses the 2 key (Ironic, ne? I am that obsessed)*
Hotaru's voice: Mommy, it's me!!! The new debate topic is 'Relationships need arguments to survive'. Ring back when you get this message *Hangs up*
Shinnimegami: Phew! That was close.
Duo: Remind me again why we're running away from 'Taru?
Shinnimegami: *Whacks Duo across the back of his head* Gee, I wonder.
Duo: ITAI!!!!
Shinnimegami: YOU WERE GONNA TAKE ME SHOPPING!!!!!!
Duo: Oh, right!
Shinnimegami: I give up. *Sweatdrop*
*Back at Quat-dudes' mansion.*
Amara: . on the affirmative we have Serena, Darien, Mina and Lita. On the negative we have Raye, Wufei, Quistis and Irvine. I am your chairperson!
Michelle: WOOOOHOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! GO URANUS!!!!
Diana: Go highnesses!!!
A. Nataku: Go Lita, Sis and Wufei!!! *Gets a glare from both teams*
Pansy Gal: Go SIS!!!!
Mina: I shall win for the sake of the Aino family!!!
Pansy Gal: Yay! You're my favourite sister!
Chibi Neko: What? Jens' a pain in the ass already?
Pansy Gal: Yup
Mina: What was the topic again?
Amara: UURRRAAAAAAAGGGHHHH!!!!!! *Rams a frying pan into Mina's head and sits back down*
Mina: OWCHNESS!!!!
Serena: *Laughs hysterically, happily rolls on the ground and straight into the pool*
*Shopping Mall.*
Shinnimegami: $1000000 down, $7000000 to go!
Duo: What are you doing?
Shinnimegami: Binge shopping! *Giggles*
Duo: .*v . v' sweatdrop*
*Kitty-Quat's place.*
Serena: .And if I had a cent for every time Mamo-chan and I have fought, I'd be richer than Quatre. Then again, I am the PRINCESS OF THE MOON AND NEO-QUEEN OF FUTURE CRYSTAL TOKYO!!!!! So, you see, a stable relationship requires arguments to balance it all out!
Amara: Er... Thanks, Usa-chan
Serena: No problemo!
Amara: Baka-hime. ok! Raye, time to take the reigns!
Raye: I- *Goes for a dramatic pause*
Audience: *Moves closer*
Raye: Am not a love doctor, though I still am trying to steal Mamo-chan! Therefore, I'M LEAVING!!!
Audience: *Stares as the Princess of Mars storms off inside to harass the Goddess of Death . who isn't there*
Amara: .
Wufei: Baka onna
Amara: And now, it's Darien! PS FUCK YOU, MAMORU!!!
Darien: Fuck you too, Tenoh
Amara: Hurry the hell up!
Darien: *Blabbers on with the topic. for an hour*
*Shopping Mall.*
*Shinnimegami is sitting in a chair, and Duo is kneeling in front of her, holding one of her hands... it seems that. aw fuck it. Find out for yourselves. All I'm telling you is that instead of a diamond ring, there's a burger ring*
Shinnimegami: *Is in tears of joy*
Duo: Well?
Shinnimegami: *Thinks for a moment* Yes
*Duo stands up and drags Shinnimegami back to the food hall*
*Territory of Cuteness.*
Pansy Gal: Has it concerned anyone that the deathies aren't here?
Quatre: Um. *Walks inside and walks back out again* You're right!
A. Nataku: *Is for some reason sitting in Wufei's lap* No shit, Sherlock
Heero: Knowing 02, they're at the pub
Chibi Neko: Knowing Ants, they're at the mall.
Pansy Gal/ Chibi Neko/ A. Nataku: OH MY GOD!!!!!!
Chibi Neko: BINGE SHOPPING! Poor Duo.
A. Nataku: Hmm. torture. coolness!
Pansy Gal: Alex, I question your sanity
A. Nataku: What about my sanity? Is it broken?
Pansy Gal: *Sad voice* I think so
Michelle: New debate topic! Nataku's sani-
A. Nataku: Neptune, I will destroy you
Michelle: Sorry! *Hides behind Amara*
Chibi Neko: Hmm. sanity. wow
Heero: Suicide!
Chibi Neko/ Heero: Have Gundam, will blow up! WOO HOO!!!!!!
*Shopping Mall.*
*The two deathies are in a store that selling cd's really cheap. But they're good cd's!!*
Shinnimegami: *Is looking through the 'L' section* Goddamn, where is it?!?!
Duo: Whatcha lookin' for?
Shinnimegami: Linkin Park. The one with the imitation Altron Gundam on the cover
Duo: Who'd buy anything with Wu-man's Gundam on it? It's insane!!!
Shinnimegami: Hai.
Duo: Here it is! *Holds up the album*
(AN Yes, I know it's sad that I don't have the Linkin Park album yet. I'm still saving up for a Playstation 2! I wanna play Final Fantasy 10!!!)
Shinnimegami: *Yanks the cd away* Mai-yan!!! *Puts it into the weird cd player thing and listens* Fina- fucking- ly!
Duo: You don't come here very often, do you?
Shinnimegami: *Raspberry* Of course I do! *Sings*
Crawling in my skin
These wounds that will not heal
This is how I fall
Confusing what is real.
Duo: You have a nice voice
Shinnimegami: *Stops the cd* 4 years of choir through high school, singing whenever my favorite songs come on the radio, no duh!
Duo: *Dr. Evil voice* Riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight. I take it you were one of very few girls in the choir?
Shinnimegami: One of 100 girls. I went to an all-girl school. There I met Alex, Erin and Kathrine, otherwise known as A. Nataku, Pansy Gal and Chibi Neko
Duo: One question. If you're the self proclaimed Goddess of Death, what does that make the other 3?
Shinnimegami: Um. Alex is the Goddess of War, Erin's the Goddess of Life and I think Kath's the Goddess of Cats and Suicide or Chaos or something like that
Duo: Right. I'll remember that
Shinnimegami: You do that! *Pays for the album* Everyone's probably wondering where we are. We better go now
Duo: You haven't bought the mall yet!
*House of the Almighty Cute Blonde.*
Minutes: 30 of me pass! *30 minutes pass*
*Shinnimegami re-enters and a very bemused Duo follows*
Chibi Neko: Uh oh. what did you do to the poor guy!!!!
Shinnimegami: Well, lets see.. We went shopping, did more shopping, and, oh, whaddaya know! Even more shopping!!!!!
*The four author-friends; Shinnimegami, Pansy Gal, Chibi Neko and A. Nataku huddle*
Chibi Neko: Well? Wassup?
Shinnimegami: December, Bali, bridesmaids!!!!!
Chibi Neko/ Pansy Gal/ A. Nataku: WHAT?!?!?!?
Shinnimegami: *Flashes a really expensive looking ring* Well, Duo borrowed a couple of million dollars off Q-man and. um.
Pansy Gal: You bitch! Stealing money off my hubbie!!!
Shinnimegami: It wasn't stealing! It was permanently borrowing!
A. Nataku: What's happening? I can't take the suspense!!!!
Shinnimegami: It's decided. The day after my birthday, which shall be the 9th, you 3 are gonna be bridesmaids at MY WEDDING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Chibi Neko/ Pansy Gal/ A. Nataku: HE PROPOSED TO YOU?!?!?!?
Shinnimegami: Keep it down! It's a surprise!
Chibi Neko: What color do we have to wear?
Shinnimegami: HE ONLY PROPOSED TODAY YOU JACKASSES!!!!!
A. Nataku: I don't think they heard you on Pluto
Trista: Yes?
Shinnimegami: Not you, the planet, Luna P!
Trista: I AM the planet!
Rinoa: Right.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ On the next chapter:
Shinnimegami: And in conclusion, Gauntlet Legends, Soul Calibur, Crazy Taxi and Sonic Adventures are the best Dreamcast games!
Duo: Hmm. Video games!
Shinnimegami: The thought of staring at a tv screen for hours on end.
Duo/ Shinnimegami: AWSOME!!!
Pansy Gal: You're lucky you have a Dreamcast, Ants
Shinnimegami: It's not mine. It's Adrian's. And besides, you have a Gamecube
Quatre: I prefer Nintendo 64
Pansy Gal: Pokemon Stadium 1 and 2!!!
Shinnimegami: *Screams* Ahh! The eternally painful game!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Blah blah blah. The same shit over again.
Endnotes:
Heck, the only song I put in was sung by yours truly.
Krawling, sung by Shinnimegami, originally performed by Linkin Park.
Peeps, you can expect Shinnimegami to sing In The End as well in the next chapter!
If you want to request something (or suggest), or be evil and send flamers, send them to shinnimegami@hotmail.com and I might consider your ideas. If I do, however, choose yours, I will acknowledge you in the next chapters. Be sure to leave your ff.net i.d. otherwise I can't acknowledge you.
