The first few weeks were the hardest; he was becoming so accustomed to the feeling of regret and the dull ache in his heart that he didn't really think about it anymore. At first, whenever he would see Luka and Abby together he would feel an unbearable pang of it, squeezing his lungs shut. He had tried to avoid them together, or, for that matter, wither of them alone. He still avoided them, but not as much out of necessity as custom. He had given in to the fact that he was not the man she had chosen, and had come to think of her as the unattainable woman; the one he would always dream of and just settle for less.
He still felt the flicker of interest, of connection when she called his name in the hall or spoke to him, or was even near him, but what used to be followed with a little spasm of "Carter you should just do it- ask her out" was now left hanging alone, dangling in his head, and he didn't really know what to do with that. His life had fallen into routine, sleeping, eating working, not really going out. It wasn't that he felt sorry for himself, at least not on purpose, he just tried really hard not to feel at all.
Abby, on the other hand was happy. At least she wasn't unhappy. She had Luka, and, although he wasn't the type of person she would have seen herself going out with, he was sweet and fun and the two had a good time together. Sure, he was a little jealous sometimes when she talked to other people a lot, and he was flirtatious with other girls sometimes, and he could be too intense at times, but everyone has their faults. He could be very charming too.
She had been a little confused when he had first asked her out. Sure, she had flirted with him, but she had actually felt more of a spark with Carter, with whom she had certainly flirted with as well, at least at first. Carter had really backed off after a little while. She had actually expected Carter to ask her out for a really long time, and she had been close to asking him out ..a couple times. But that just never happened, and this was okay too. This was how it had turned out. When she thought about it, and she thought about it every now and then, she didn't know why it was, but she wondered why Carter never had asked her.

Gamma had sent Carter an invitation to the family reunion on the coast. The big gathering was something held in the huge beach house with the million rooms and three kitchens, and reunion that he usually found a way to weasel out of. He seemed to do this consistently without very much notice taken by his relatives; however this year there was a handwritten note from Gamma attached to his frilly purple invitation. In her loopy handwriting he read: John, Becasue you have been unfortunately busy for the past four family gatherings I have organized, I was careful to plan far ahead for this one so you will be able to plan around it. I look forward to seeing you there dear, and a bring date if you would like. Love, Gamma

Carter would usually have dismissed it right off. But this year, and not because of the note, he felt that he might actually go. It was just that he didn't think a weekend away from his regular life would do any harm, something memorable to spice his life up a bit. And a family reunion was bound to be memorable. He was a bit irritated by her note though. She was always pushing him to bring a date. It was just the way she was.

Abby went in to work on Tuesday after spending the night at Luka's. She was a little ticked off at Luka (he hadn't let her sleep very much..and she was pretty tired that morning). She had been trudging through her rounds in a state of one who had never really woken up that morning, and was just taking a five min break in the lounge trying to clear her exhausted brain with a mug of coffee when Carter came in. He walked through the door, faltered the tiniest bit at the sight of her, but then resigned to the fact that he would be in her company and entered the room.

"hey" she grunted. She had seen him falter, and added it to her mental note. He seemed to really be avoiding her lately. She had not exactly been seeking him out either, but she did feel an awkwardness that didn't used to be there, and frankly, she missed him. She had decided to confront the issue soon, but at the moment she was feeling too out of herself to handle much of anything. "Morning" He answered. He knew he was being a little ridiculous, avoiding her like the plague. She was just Abby, they had been close friends. He could just hang out with her, he could relax. And he tried. He sat down opposite her. "You looked wiped" "Thanks, you look great yourself" she smiled a little grimace as she took a sip. Carter drummed his fingers on the table. His thoughts suddenly turned to his reunion. Wouldn't it be perfect if he were free to ask Abby to go with him? Yeah right. Maybe, if he had asked her two months ago, when they were really close, but they hadn't really talked for a while. And she was taken. He took a deep breath. 'Oh well.' "So, what have you been up to lately, I-" Carter finally broke the silence just as Susan poked her head in.
"Good, Abby, Weaver is looking for you. She's not in a great mood either. Sorry-" "That's ok. Thanks." Abby sighed. She got up, smiled apologetically at Carter. He gave a little wave. "G'luck" "thanks" He watched her walk out, then turned back to his fingers. "Ahh, the secret heartache" Susan walked over to the counter and started to make herself some coffee. Carter looked up, startled. "What?" Susan gave him that look that says 'oh cammon, it's so obvious' "Abby. I can read you like a book Carter." He looked at her incredulously for a moment, his heart beating. How obvious was it? "What do you mean?" "You're madly in love with her." Susan said matter of factly, mixing some sugar into her coffee and walking over to the table. "I honestly thought you two were gonna go out- before Luka. I think you would be cute- really." She looked up at him, smiling smugly. "ok, Carter gave in, " how obvious is it" "oooh.. Not that much, only to me. I've been watching. It's too bad ya know. Luka is a great guy and everything, but he isn't really that nice to her in public. I dunno..I never really saw them getting together." "yeah?" Carter tried to look mildly interested. "Ya know, she does seem to have questionable taste in guys.oh - that wasn't very nice. I didn't mean that. It's just, she seems to attract some pretty serious jerks." "Hey, Luka's not a jerk." Carter felt the sudden need to defend Luka, maybe because he wanted to convince himself that he, Carter, wasn't horrible for having a grudge against Luka since he started flirting with and. 'stealing' Abby. "Oh, I didn't mean him... Ya know." The conversation turned and they talked for a while about this and that. Finally, they both needed to get back to work, and the idea popped into his head. "Susan, I'm going to a big family thing on the coast next weekend. Would you want to come, just - we could hang out- ya know- avoid the family- it's a huge place. Just, if you want a break from this," He gave a little wave toward the lounge door. Susan looked surprised and touched. " Wow, that sounds great. But I have a few things I really can't avoid this weekend. Thanks though." She looked really sorry. "Oh, that's okay." Carter thought it might be fun to just invite a friend. And Susan was as close as he had to to that right now. He knew he would have fun with her. He didn't really have other friends to speak of. He did, but nobody he would want to take to a resort on the West coast, he hung out with the people he worked with, and that was about it. At least lately. " Well, actually, it's a really nice place, and I have a few slots open, you know, to bring people, so if you think of anyone, someone in the ER I mean, they're welcome to come. All expenses paid- it's a good deal, save me from spending too much time with the folks,- big place.." He had already said that. "Oh, Ok, yeah, I'll spread the word." "thanks" She left the lounge with a smile. He took a deep breath. Maybe he would have someone to hang out with, he didn't much care who, just to have an excuse to avoid a few of the get- togethers they were bound to have planned.

Abby walked into Luka's apartment that night to find him in a state of extreme excitement. He fairly flew over to the door and hugged her the instant she walked in. "whoa.. What are you so worked up about?" He stepped back. "I just got a call from my friend from home, Nastya, and she's coming to town! Really soon! I haven't seen her for three years, and we used to hang out all the time! It'll be so fun. I thought she could stay here.. if that's ok with you, and we can catch up. You'll like her I think- she's really fun." "Wow. That's great." Abby felt exited too. It was nice to see Luka so happy. She could feel it radiating from him. "When does she come?" "She's not sure exactly. She just called and said she wanted to come to the city and visit, plus she has been in touch with someone here about a job possibility and is coming to check it out." Abby noticed the order in which he listed her reasons for coming and smiled. It was those little cute things she liked about Luka. He smiled back and took her coat. "Well, that you sir," she said in mock formality. "What a gentleman!" Then he gave her a long look and leaned in to kiss her.' Maybe not so much' she laughed to herself.

Next day, Carter got some funny looks from people in the ER. He went about his work as usual, mildly interested in what the latest gossip might be, but not enough to confront anyone. He was working on a particularly difficult trauma; a bike rider had been smashed into by a truck and was bleeding internally, when Pratt asked him about the "retreat". "So, Carter, I could use a few days away from this dump, and I hear you're looking for a smart and capable doctor who has earned a break." Carter had not expected Susan to tell him, and wasn't keen on spending his family reunion with Pratt as his only 'friend'. "You heard that did you?" "Yup. Some of the nurses were talking about it." "That right?" Carter was distracted by the immediate problem of blood and tissue, and tried to sound uninterested. "Seems there's a sort of lottery going on, 'who will Carter pick'. Little do they know- I'm your man." Pratt laughed. Carter took a deep breath and kept on working. If it came down to Pratt, he could do without a friend. "Sorry man, but I already have the spaces filled." Pratt looked a little crestfallen. "who'day pick?" Carter ignored the question and kept working.

Abby was walking down the hall with Luka when they ran into Carter. Luka steered her towards him and hailed Carter. "hey Carter! I hear you need some people to go the the east coast and have a vacation!" Great. Carter had not meant to leave this so open, and he certainly didn't think of the possibility that Luka would want to go. "Well," Luka continued, "If you still have some open spaces, Abby and I were thinking of going away this weekend, maybe we could join you." Abby looked startled. What was Luka playing at? "Luka..?" She squinted at him. "What? It would be great! Get out of the city for a while, see the ocean. If it's ok? What d'ya say Carter?" Carter didn't know what to say. He glanced from Luka's enthusiastic face to Abby's confused one and his mind went a little numb. "Yeah, sure." He stated. Then he walked away.

Abby wasn't sure what had just happened. She hadn't heard anything about Carter's little lottery. And she had not been planning on leaving this weekend. She and Luka had not talked about it at all. She felt extremely awkward about it. It seemed to her hat Carter's scheme, whatever it had been, had rolled a little out of control, and he didn't seem too happy at the prospect that she a d Luka would be accompanying him the coast. Frankly, she wasn't too comfortable with it either. The three of them were not the best of friends, and she thought it was a perfect situation for stress, at least in her case. And she had felt a little tension between the two men for a few weeks too. Nothing outright hostile, but they were not as friendly as they had been. She took Luka aside immediately and demanded he explain what happened.

Carter went into the bathroom and washed his face. He was a little shaky. This was not going to be fun. He had wanted someone to hang out with; to escape from his crazy and boring relatives, but he had a feeling that if Abby and Luka came, he would be running form them first. And when he had thought about Abby coming, this was not what he had in mind. But he had told Pratt that the spaces were filled. And he felt bad saying no, at least to Abby. And if he did let them come, maybe he would be able to let go of it. If he did this nice thing for Luka, he could feel better about himself, sort of make up for all the loathing he'd done lately..Fine. It was just a weekend.

This is my first ever fanfic, so let me know what you think of it so far!