Hey, all. Long time no update, eh? Deku Scrub here, of course. Things in this chappy, hopefully, will advance the story a bit more. I'll admit, we are getting near the home stretch, but the story will go on! And so, here you go, another chapter of "Her." Lyrics in this chapter belong to Madonna and Gloria Estefan, two divas that I give props to.

Lost Princess

Relena was sick of it all. She stared into the mirror, disgusted at what she had become.

She had always been afraid of turning into this, and now it had finally happened. She had become a hollow shell, empty of truth and feelings, nothing but an image. She had allowed herself to become that which she hated most, a self-loathing, hateful nothingness.

The shell looked at a knife on her bedroom drawer, light from the lamp causing it to flash with viciousness. She picked it up.

Funny, she thought. It's so small, and it's almost pretty. Who would have thought that such a thing could have such power over lives? With this, countless men and women have died since the dawn of time.

Oh well, she thought. Just another casualty.

- - -

Areina needed practice, and it seemed as though every room in the house was taken. Hilde was in the kitchen; Quatre was in the living room with Trowa; and Wufei was in the piano room. Even the bathroom was taken by Duo!

Finally, she gave up and headed for her room. Maybe there I can get some rehearsal for tonight, she thought.

As she walked in, she noticed that the curtains were pulled shut, disallowing any light from entering the room. The lamp in the corner was on, right next to Relena's bed drawer. Relena stood in front of her large mirror, and Areina guessed she was admiring herself.

Areina rolled her eyes and turned to the door again, but stopped when something in the mirror caught her eye. A small red drop shined under the light of the lamp.

Areina stopped dead in her tracks, and leapt for Relena. She grabbed the weaker blond and forced her onto the bed, making sure she couldn't move the hand with a knife in it.

"What the hell do you think you're doing to yourself?" Areina screamed into her face.

"Stay out of it!" Relena screamed in an equally angry tone. "It's none of your business anyway! Besides, why would you care?"

Areina's grip on Relena loosened. She had a point. Why did Areina care? Relena was possibly the one person in the apartment that she had no feelings for: not lust, love, hate, or any kind of emotion whatsoever!

Areina snapped back into reality when she felt Relena easing off of the bed. She pushed her back down. "Stop it! Why, of all people, do YOU want to kill yourself?

"You've got the most money of anyone I've ever met in my life, you're beautiful beyond my wildest dreams, you're insanely popular, and you love your life!" Areina grabbed the knife away from her. "Besides, you were doing it all wrong! If you wanted to slit your throat, you needed to cut much higher! Near where the Adam's apple on a man is!"

"Do you really think my life is that great?" Relena retorted. "I can't even..." She stopped abruptly, suddenly taking in all of Areina's words. "Wait. How would you know the proper way to kill yourself?"

Areina blinked, and stood up, off of the bed. She stared into the mirror, knowing that this would be hard to admit.

- - -

"I have tried to kill myself," Areina said slowly.

Relena's jaw dropped. Why would Areina want to commit suicide? SHE was the one who had everything. Everything she touched seemed to turn into gold, everyone she met fell in love with her, she was gorgeous, she had a beautiful body, mind, and voice, and she was very secure.

"There have been days, countless days," Areina said, seeming to recall a bad dream. "When I would sit in my little apartment back at home in Canada, and wonder why I should keep on going. I was so alone, so poor, with no family and no friends. Every day, I came so close to slitting my throat, or stabbing myself, or strangling myself. And every day, no matter what the time was, the boy who lived across the hall from me somehow knew what I was doing, and would always ring the doorbell, asking, 'Can I borrow a cup of sugar?'

"Until one day, when he came over asking that, right when I had a knife to my neck, I finally realized what he was really trying to say. He was telling me how much I had to live for, that there were people, like him, who really cared for me. I began to cry, and I hugged the boy. He just stood there, telling me that everything would be okay.

"The next day, the boy moved."

Areina looked back at Relena, who was staring at her knife.

"So why do you want to kill yourself?" Areina asked inquisitively.

"I," Relena began uncomfortably. "Sure, Areina, you think I have everything. I have money, power, fame, even beauty. But the one thing I really want, I don't have."

"What's that?"

Relena looked at Areina with wet eyes. "Friends. Not just somebody who says they're your friend, just so that they can manipulate you and look like they're at the head of the crowd. Real friends. I want friends who really care about me, and who will be there for me.

"But every day in this apartment, I feel like less and less. I look at you and everyone else, and you all act so happy together. Although I try to be nice to you, you always shun me. And so, I try to appear cheery and rosy- eyed all the time, in an effort to hide my real self, because I'm afraid you'll reject me again."

- - -

Areina nodded. "Well, Relena, I care for you. I am your friend."

"Don't say that because you pity me."

"I'm serious," Areina said.

Relena looked into Areina's eyes, and Areina tried to see her.

The two embraced.

- - -

Areina was eventually forced to rehearse in the room with the TV. Heero found it kind of humorous, to watch the girl try to dance around everything in the room.

"Why don't you just not do a dance tonight?" Heero said quietly, more to himself than to her.

"It gives the crowd something to watch," Areina responded in between gasps for air.

Heero shrugged, resuming watching her dance. Although he thought all of her performances were entirely too danced-up, he couldn't help but enjoy watching someone try so hard at something.

Finally, he asked a burning question.

"Areina, did your father abandon you when you were little?"

Areina stopped dancing immediately, and stared at the floor. She leaned on the couch. "I don't want to discuss it, Heero."

"Why not?" Heero said. "It seems like it's been on your chest for a while now."

Areina closed her eyes. "My father left my mother and me for war when I was young."

"There's more too it than that, isn't there?" Heero said softly, almost gently, at least for him.

She looked away, seemingly trying to avoid Heero's face. "He had a mistress. He said he was leaving for the war, but the real war didn't actually start for another two years.

"My mom knew that he wasn't going for war. In fact, she even knew he had a mistress. Although she knew that he never loved her as much as he loved the other woman, she let him leave for his lover because she knew that he'd be happy that way.

"She loved him so much, Heero, that she was willing to give him up if he would be happier in another life."

Areina covered her face, and turned entirely away from Heero.

"Areina, it's okay," Heero said comfortingly. "I know how it feels - well, maybe I don't, but you should know that your father loved you, and..."

He trailed off. For the first time in his life, Heero was at a loss for words. Areina stroked the amulet around her neck broodingly.

"He gave that to you, didn't he?"

"On his dying day," Areina said through tears.

- - -

She suddenly snapped out of her emotions.

"I'm sorry," she said quickly, wiping her tears.

"For what?" Heero said bluntly. "For showing me your emotions? Areina, revealing your emotions is the greatest gift you can give to someone!"

Areina stopped abruptly. She glanced at him, and then stared. Finally, she gathered enough courage to walk to him, and hug him quickly, then withdraw.

- - -

Duo was shocked. Although he and Areina always fought, he was disappointed that he hadn't been able to talk to her much at all today. There were only a few minutes until her performance, and he sat alone at the bar as Hilde and the rest danced.

He couldn't understand it. Why was he so depressed? Usually he was cheerful and happy. For some reason, he felt a sense of foreboding, like something bad was going to happen tonight.

Weird.

- - -

The curtains arose to reveal Areina alone onstage, lying down in front of a piano and three background singers. It was funny, Relena thought, because when Areina had started performing here, the club had barely enough money to buy microphones for the stage. Yet, now they could afford bands, background singers and dancers, even pianos!

"Take a bow, the night is over, this," Areina sang quietly with the piano as she lay on the floor in jeans and a sweater that draped to reveal her shoulders. "Masquerade is getting older."

It was immediately obvious to everyone in the room that Areina was singing to Relena alone. Some people turned their heads to Relena, but all turned back to the stage as the performance continued.

Relena began to interpret the lyrics.

"Lights are low, the curtains down," she sang.

You're alone, and finally have a moment's peace.

"There's no one here." The background singers echoed her softly.

Relena had no one to turn to, no friends.

"Say your lines, but do you feel them."

You put on an act for everyone, but do you really mean it, Relena?

"Do you mean what you say when there's no one around?"

Are you even yourself when you're alone, or have you lost that, too?

"Watching you, watching me, one lonely star."

Everyone watches your every move, and you become alone.

- - -

She turned to Duo now, still in the same song.

"I've always been in love with you," she chanted as she got up. "I guess you've always known it's true.

"You took my love for granted, why oh why? The show is over, say good- bye."

She continued quickly into the next verse of the song. Duo didn't need to interpret the words: the song fit him so well.

"Make them laugh, it comes so easy," she sang as she stared into Duo. The room's attention shifted to the young boy. "When you get to the part where you're breaking my heart.

"Hide behind your smile, all the world loves a clown."

Duo looked back at her. Why did she do this to him? What was she trying to say? He had thought that she didn't want a relationship.

"Wish you well, I cannot stay," she continued, now teary-eyed. "You deserve an award for the role that you played."

Now he understood. She was trying to let him know that she still cared for him, but that it was time to let go. He half-smiled to himself at the irony of the situation. Though Areina had never wanted their relationship to go beyond a friendship, in the end, she was hurt, too.

"No more masquerade, you're one lonely star," she finished, leaning on the piano in pain.

- - -

Areina turned toward Trowa. "And I'd do anything for you, I'll give you up."

Dancers began to walk onstage, and Trowa tried to understand what the lyrics meant.

"If that's what I should do, to make you happy," she turned away as the dancers commenced into a slow salsa.

"I can pretend each time I see you that I don't care and I don't need you," she sang desperately into the microphone, entering Trowa's mind.

"And though inside I feel like dying, you know you'll never see me crying."

She must have been referring to their awkward relationship. Every day, it seemed as though Trowa and Areina hated each other more than the last. But Trowa could tell from the next lyrics how Areina really felt.

"Don't you ever think that I don't love you," she practically wept into the microphone. "That for one minute I forgot you." She was shaking out of pure emotion.

"But sometimes things don't work out right, and you just have to say," Areina stopped, then finally ended. "Goodbye."

She held out the note for as long as she could, and the audience raved. However, the performance was far from over.

- - - Danny was sick of this.

Although this girl was not nearly as good as some of his artists, the audience of the club continuously seemed to go crazy for her, more so than he'd ever heard at any of his artists' concerts.

Why did he keep coming back? He was only wasting his time here. His boss had warned him that if he didn't find a new artist soon, he'd lose his job! So why was he sitting around here, waiting for a talent that obviously was not there!

He knew why. Despite the fact that the girl had only an average voice, very simple dance moves, and wasn't even that amazingly beautiful, he saw something in her. He believed she could do better (If none of you remember this guy, than go back to the "Braided" chapter).

The lights went completely black, and after almost a minute of waiting, the stage was finally revealed to the audience again.

Areina stood alone on the stage once more, this time with a top hat on, a navy blue suit, and black high-heeled shoes.

The music began with nothing but a drum in the background.

"Come on, girls," Areina shouted to the audience as all of the women in the club shouted back. "Do you believe in love?" she continued in her dialogue with the audience. "Cause I got something to say about it, and it goes something like this!"

The music commenced, enthralling the audience. "Don't go for second best, baby, put your love to the test.

"You know, you know, you've got to," she sang in a fun tone. Ten dancers filled the stage, this time dressed all in black, but more modern clothes. One man was even shirtless!

"Make him express how he feels, and maybe then you'll know you're love is real," she sang as she dominated the audience.

"You don't need diamond rings," she sang as a man with enough golden necklaces and rings on to make a king look poor. "Or eighteen karat gold."

She pushed the man away, who fell into the arms of another woman. "Fancy cars that go very fast, you know they never last, no, no," she sang as she did a quick little routine with her fellow dancers. The background singers echoed her once again, continuing the melody.

"What you need is a big strong hand to life you to your higher ground," she nearly screamed as she shook her hips violently. "Make you feel like a queen on a throne, make him love you till you can't come down!"

Two men lifted her, and she jumped off and quickly shed her suit's vest to reveal a belly-cut, sleeveless shirt. She began a series of tap-dances and hand gestures with a group of five dancing women.

"Don't go for second best, baby, put your love to the test." She began look back and forth between the audience and the band. "You know, you know, you've got to make him express how he feels, and maybe then you'll know your love is real!"

The music continued, and she began a solo dance, using her hat as a prop to spin, balance, and shake. Finally, she threw the hat into the audience, driving the crowd wild, and continued.

"Express yourself, you've got to make him," she sang loudly as she danced with a second man. "Express himself, hey, hey.

"So if you want it right now, make him show you how," she began a strut across the stage, cornering the man. She finally threw him to the female dancers. "Express what he's got, oh baby ready or not!"

A man began crawling on the floor toward her, begging. "And when you're gone, he might regret it," she sang as she began sidestepping toward him. "Think about the love he once had.

"Try to carry on, but he just won't get it," she hummed with her background dancers as she kicked the man up and ordered him back down. "He'll be back on his knees!

"Express yourself!"

The music stopped, and Danny thought.

- - -

Areina began walking backstage, when she was stopped.

He had a briefcase with him, yet he looked fairly young. In fact, he was probably not much older than Areina. He wore a suit and a tie, and very polished black shoes. He looked at her worriedly.

"I can't believe I'm doing this," he mumbled to himself. "May I speak to you for one moment, ma'am?"