Chapter Seven - The Tell-Tale Toe

Chapter Seven - The Tell-Tale Toe

A loud crash woke Severus up the next day. He was still in his robes, and he smelled strongly of vodka. The sheets of his bed clung to his ankles, which were stretched out three inches off the mattress. He felt his wand resting in his pocket and he got up to see what the noise was.

It was around noon and Lucius was in his room, stuffing as many clothes as he could into a large leather suitcase.

"Oh, good afternoon, Severus," he said with a grunt as he shoved three sweater vests into a tight space.

"What's with this?" he said, flicking the side of the suitcase with his long finger.

"I'm going on a trip!" he said, now sitting on the overloaded suitcase.

"To where? And with whom?" Severus was now a little interested.

"Well ..." Lucius scratched his forehead, trying to find the right way to put things. "You see, do you remember the time we learned to apparate and I was paired up with James?"

"Yes."

"And instead of apparating outside the classroom, we wound up in a casino?"

"Yes," Severus said, growing a little impatient.

"Well, last night, Sirius and Remus told me they were going back there--it's a place called Las Vegas--and everyone's going and they said I could take someone--"

"I don't want to go anywhere with them," Severus interjected defiantly.

"I know that, that's why I'm taking Narcissa. Oh Severus, I think I'm in love!" Lucius paused and looked at Severus. Severus looked like he was about to maul Lucius. Lucius backed up a little.

"I-I was only looking out for your best interest, Sev! P-please don't hurt me!" Lucius flung up his arms over his face.

Severus reached into his pocket and grabbed hold of his wand. He pointed it at Lucius, but nothing happened. In fact, he wasn't even holding his wand, but two Crayola markers taped together.

"NO! Don't write on me! I just had this cleaned! Please! I'll bring you back some dirty playing cards, I promise! Just don't ..."

Lucius stopped pleading and glanced up at his friend through his fingers. Severus looked like he could make powder out of the markers with his index finger and thumb. He looked down at Lucius, his eyes blazing. His eyebrows lowered and his face twisted into a malevolent scowl. Then he erupted like a volcano.

"GODDAMIT LUTHITH--"

Severus clasped his hands over his mouth. He backed away slowly out of the room, looking stunned and sick. He shook his head and dashed down the hall to his room.

"Come on girls, we've gotta get out of this jail!"

Severus downed a can of beer as he stared at the television. Without Lucius around to clean up after him, he was covered in filth. Empty cans of nuts and discarded bags of Cheetos littered the floor. Severus belched and settled into the couch a little more, taking in the splendor that was Charlie's Angels.

While Severus laid there, a zombie slave to the TV god, his mind raced with insane thoughts. He thought of what he would do if he ever got his hands on James. He pondered where his journal and wand could be. But then he thought of the root of all this trouble. The one who got him into this mess. The one who kept him from living up to his real potential.

Tom Riddle.

Tom stole his wand. Tom took his journal. Tom forced him to join his stupid club that wasn't really much of a club at all. This was all Tom's fault, and Severus was not going to take it anymore.

Maybe it was all the spicy meatballs he had, or maybe it was because he didn't have Lucius around to stop him, or perhaps it was because he was sleep deprived, but Severus got an idea.

Severus stood up and let the crumbs fall off his bare legs. He walked resolutely into the kitchen and flung open the broom closet. With incredible strength, he ripped the broom off its handle. He tied a fork to the top of it with shoelace like a makeshift spear. He opened the cupboard and dipped two of his fingers into a jar of tomato sauce. He streaked them on his face and put a handprint on his chest. He made a sun out of mustard on his arm and an odd design on his forehead from toothpaste. On the floor was an old, brown, suede jacket, and Severus tied it around his head. He smiled viciously and scrambled into the hall, moving on all-fours.

Severus opened Tom's door slowly. His victim was sleeping soundly, and Severus moved along the floor like a savage. Tom's window was open and a cool breeze moved through the room. Tom was lying on the bed silently, free of blankets. His toe looked eerie in the light of the moon. Severus snarled and moved toward the bed.

He raised his spear, the fork shining murderously in the moonlight. He lowered it swiftly, slicing off the toe with one fluid movement. For an instant, Severus was afraid Tom would awaken, but he only turned over restlessly.

"Come back, Barbara, sing for me ..." Tom said dreamily, still very asleep.

It was time for Severus to make his escape. He snatched the toe and put it in his own mouth. He ran out of the apartment, dashed down the stairs, still crawling on his feet and hands. He crouched in the middle of the London street and looked around, the toe hanging out of his mouth slightly. The few people who were out looked at him strangely, stopping in their tracks to stare at him. A man in his briefs with war paint wasn't very common there.

Not knowing exactly what to do, Severus stood up and looked around calmly. Then, without warning, he ran screaming down the street and then into the forest outside of town.

Severus never stopped running until he saw it through the trees. The castle looked beautiful in the morning light. Summer was coming to a close, and the teachers of Hogwarts were readying their classes for the new students. Severus bounded through the brush and swam across the freezing lake. It would have felt nice to him, but his heart was pounding so hard and his mind was elsewhere, he didn't have time to think of the waters' temperature. When he reached the shore, he jumped right through the first window he saw.

No one was in the first corridor he came tumbling through. Ignoring the glass stuck in his skin, he ran up staircase after staircase until he saw him.

"PROFESSOR DUMBLEDORE!" he shouted, running toward him.

"Severus Snape? Is that you?"

"O great Headmaster, please give me a job!" he sobbed, burying his face into Dumbledore's silky robes.

"Normally on such short notice, I would refuse"--Severus cried harder--"But there is a position open."

"Really?" Severus said brightly.

"The Potions Master is going on maternity leave, and you can have her job."

"What about hers'?" Severus inquired, pointing to Empiress who had come out of a classroom.

"Yes, Severus, I think you would make an excellent Potions Master," Dumbledore said thoughtfully.

Severus chased down the Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher and pounced on her, sending her flying out of the third story window.

Severus dashed back to Dumbledore who was reflecting, just as he had left him.

"Looks like the Dark Arts position is open," Severus said with a grin.

"Get yourself cleaned up, Severus, my boy, for you will be the Potions professor of Hogwarts!"

Severus trudged moodily down a staircase. He suddenly realized what he had gotten himself into and sulked even more.