Hello again!  I'm hoping this fic is an improvement from my last songfic, "Wanna be."  I think my problem was that I left "Wanna be" alone for too long, and "Numb," I finished in three days (Spring Break '03, I just take forever to get things up.).  It's Mokuba-centric, which is really weird for me because on my list of fave YuGiOh characters (come on, don't pretend you don't have one too...) Mokuba is not really near the top.  But I heard the song and thought it fit perfectly.  I'm weird like that.

Rated PG for Mokuba's language.  *grin*  You heard me.

Set in the future, where Mokuba's grown somewhat bitter about his older brother.  Or perhaps this is an AU fic.  Whatever.  There's a duel in here; duels seem to turn out really weird written out, so that's not my fault.  And the italics are the song, of course.

Disclaimer: Kazuki Takahashi is the brilliant mind behind YuGiOh, "Numb" belongs to the unsinkable Linkin Park, and... I guess Seto Kaiba owns half the town of Domino.  :P

            "Mokuba!"

            My brother's shout followed me as I crept quietly toward the fence.  I'd almost made it to the gate when I heard his footsteps crunching across the dry grass behind me.

            Damn.

I'm tired of being what you want me to be

Feeling so faithless

Lost under the surface

Don't know what you're expecting of me

Put under the pressure

Of walking in your shoes

            He dragged me back inside, not an easy task for him, I'm sure.  He was still tall and thin, ever-obsessed with his inventions and new technologies.  I, however, had changed.  I was taller (nearly as tall as he was) and considerably strong for my age.  I was independent.

            "Mokuba, this has to stop."  He was starting to get used to it, though.  Every few days I'd run.  Most nights, he caught me.  Some nights, he wouldn't.  And then I'd have some fun.

            "You're the only kid I know who does this."  I felt like reminding him I was the only kid he knew.  He'd never met any of my friends.  Too busy.

            "Running away won't answer any problems," he continued," so why, Mokuba?  Why do you sneak out?"

            I would've answered.  Except I preferred to ignore him.  He wouldn't understand.  He'd expected me to be just like him.  Which is why he'd refused to hire a babysitter, or ask for some help raising me.  When I was a little kid, I'd hero-worshipped him.  Now I was sixteen, and his habits of constantly working merely annoyed me.  He'd tried to mold me in his own warped image, and he'd failed miserably. 

The world will only have one Seto Kaiba.

Caught in the undertow

Just caught in the undertow

Every step that I take is

Another mistake to you

Caught in the undertow

Just caught in the undertow

            He sighed as he realized he wasn't getting an answer.  "Just... go to your room," he said in a disappointed tone.  He followed me upstairs to be sure I went to bed, then he turned off the lights and closed the door.  I laughed silently as I heard him go downstairs, watched all the lights in the house go out.

            I quietly slipped out of bed, changed out of my pajamas, and pulled the rope out from under my bed. 

This time, no one noticed as I silently climbed through the window.

I've

Become so numb

I can't feel you there

Become so tired

So much more aware

I'm becoming this

All I want to do

Is be more like me

And be less like you

            Later that night I walked quietly through the streets of Domino City.  Not at all safe, I know, to be wandering the city in the middle of the night.  The moonlight cast a strange glow to the shop windows. 

            I stepped into a darkened shop and made my way to the basement.  I pulled my hair up inside my hat, fixed my jacket, and stepped inside.

            This is what I knew of the Domino City nightlife.  The Underground Dueling Club.  There was a huge crowd every night; they had music, dancing, drinking, and dueling, of course.  I was basically a regular, and probably one of the youngest duelists.

            I loved the Underground.  The Underground was like an outlet; I could be myself.  Sort of.  At the Underground, I always wore my hair up in my hat, so no one would recognize me.  It seemed everyone in Domino knew my brother, and the last thing I needed was him finding out where I'd been going.  As an extra disguise, I went by the name "Mokai," somewhat of a combination of my first and last names. 

            But at least I could duel without my every move being critiqued, like when I dueled Seto.

            I walked over to the bar and sat down.  Kuja, the bartender, smiled when she saw me walk up.  She finished mixing a drink for some new punk I'd never met, then walked over to me, her blonde curls bouncing with every step. 

            "Hey Mokai," she said with a grin, "haven't seen you in a while!  What'll it be?"

            "Just water, Kuja," I said, giving her a weak grin.  "I've had quite a night already."

            She laughed.  I always had water, and I always came up with some excuse.  Other than the fact that I was underage. 

            She got the water for me, then laughed as I downed half the glass in a gulp.  "Geez, Mokai, what did you do before you got here, run a marathon?"

            I laughed.  "Sort of."

            "Well," she said, "save some strength for dueling!  That guy- " she motioned to the new guy at the other end of the bar, "-looks like a pretty good duelist.  He was putting together some wicked combos, from what I saw.  And he has some seriously rare cards, if you're looking to improve your deck."

            "Really, Kuja?" I said, listening intently.  Supposedly, Kuja was an excellent duelist.  However, she mostly stayed behind the counter now. 

            "One of the best," she replied.  "I knew him a few years ago.  Seems like neither of us has changed.  He's still cocky as ever.  He never got along with Jono, either."

            "Jono" was what Kuja called her boyfriend.  I never met him, and I don't think that was really his name.  However, I wasn't sure what Kuja's real name either.  Half the people at the underground used fake names anyway... myself included.

            "You could beat him though, I bet," she continued, smiling.  "His 'edge' may have worn off over the years."

            I looked down at the new guy.  He had his back to Kuja and me, apparently interested in some duel going on a few feet away.  Suddenly he spun back to the bar and began shuffling his deck. 

            I recognized him instantly.  Seto Kaiba, my brother, sat at the other end of the bar.

            Damn.

Can't you see that you're smothering me?

Holding too tightly

Afraid to lose control

Cause everything that you thought I would be

Has fallen apart right in front of you

            "I'll... be right back," I said to Kuja, who nodded and smiled.  I sprinted to the bathroom and locked the door.  I weighed my options.

            Get recognized?  No.

            Go home?  Of course not.

            I needed another way to disguise myself.  Seto knew about the hat, so it was useless.  I pulled it off and watched my hair down my back.  Then I had the idea.  I reached to my belt and unsheathed the dagger I hid under my jacket (in case I ever needed to use it...).  And I cut off my hair.  I looked into the mirror and barely recognized my own reflection.  I hoped that would be enough.  I put my hat inside my jacket and the dagger back into its sheath as I headed back to the bar.

            Back to my brother.

Caught in the undertow

Just caught in the undertow

Every step that I take is another mistake to you

Caught in the undertow

Just caught in the undertow

And every second I waste

Is more than I can take

            I walked back up and sat at the bar.  Kuja was talking to Seto, so I quickly finished my water and disappeared into the crowd.

            I wandered around for a while until I spotted a familiar purple ponytail.  Nina, my girlfriend, was leaning against the wall, talking to some friend of hers.  The dim lights made her smile look radiant.  I loved Nina.

            I'd met her at the Underground a few months ago.  She'd just moved to town and wanted to meet people.  Her brother was a duelist, but she didn't know much about the game.  She was just sitting at the bar one day, so I went over to talk to her.  She told me she recognized me from history class.  She was the only one who saw through me.  And I loved her for it.

            I walked up behind her and slipped my arms around her waist.  Her friend laughed as Nina spun around, startled.  Nina grinned as she saw it was me.  I still had my arms around her waist, so she leaned up and kissed me.  Her friend wandered off.

            We parted and she looked up at me, her fingers playing with my hair.  "What did you do to it?" she asked with a grin.  "At least you're not still wearing that hat..."

            Nina was always nagging me about the hat.  She was always such a fashion addict.  Tonight she looked cute as ever, wearing a white halter and a frilly pink skirt.  She'd pulled up her long violet hair, showing off the flower tattoo on her back. 

            She was beautiful.

            I laughed.  "No way, Nina, I still have the hat.  I had to take it off and hack off my hair."

            "Why?  Not that I'm complaining; your hair's sexy now..."  She giggled.

            I lowered my voice.  "Seto's here."

            "Oh."  She looked up at me.  "What are you going to do, Mokuba?  If he recognizes you..."

            "He doesn't know I'm here.  And here I'm Mokai, remember?"

            "Right..." she sighed.  "You and your false names..."

            " I figure I can avoid him long enough to get home.  Then I'll sneak back into my room like nothing happened.  And then- "  I noticed she'd suddenly stopped listening and was staring across the room.  I followed her gaze and saw my brother heading straight for us.

            Damn.

I've

Become so numb

I can't feel you there

Become so tired

So much more aware

I'm becoming this

All I want to do

Is be more like me

And be less like you

            Nina moved to stand beside me as he approached.  She reached for my hand and laced her fingers into mine.

            My brother looked into her eyes, glared at Nina, then back at me.

            As he began to introduce himself, I was silently thankful that my brother didn't spend enough time with me lately to recognize his own brother, or to recognize his brother's girlfriend.

            "Mai said you were one of the better duelists around here, so I request a duel.  Maybe you'll be a challenge."

            I dismissed that last part.  "Mai?"

            He rolled his eyes.  "The bartender, Kujaku Mai?"

            Oh, Kuja.  Kuja was Kujaku Mai?  I remembered Mai.  That was when Seto still cared about me...  Hmm, now that I thought about it, Kuja did resemble Mai... but it was irrelevant.

            "I'm sorry, I can't duel you," I said.  "I should really be going."

            "Going where?  Surely not home.  It's still early, and there's no way you've dueled yet tonight... Just one round, 4000 lifepoints... You're not scared, are you?"

            Nina stepped forward.  "Leave him alone.  I'll duel you."

            I looked at her, surprised.  "No, Nina, don't worry about it.  Let's go..."

            "No, Mokai, I want to do this."  She turned to my brother, eyes shining with a ferocity I'd never seen.  "Wanna duel?"

            I knew Seto Kaiba would show her no mercy.

            He smirked and tossed her the latest version of his duel disk.  "Have it your way," he said with a cold laugh.

            And so the duel began.

            Nina went first, summoning a Cure Mermaid and playing two cards facedown.

            Seto summoned La Jinn and annihilated Nina's mermaid, also taking 300 of her lifepoints.

            Nina played one card in defense mode, and Seto summoned another monster, the Dark Zebra.  Nina's defense mode monster was destroyed, and the lifesize Dark Zebra charged, doing 1800 direct damage and knocking Nina back.  As I ran to help her up, Seto played two cards facedown.

            Nina seemed a little shaken after the attack, but she then revealed one of her facedown cards, Change of Heart.  She took control of the Dark Zebra, and sacrificed it to summon the Amphibian Beast.  She then destroyed La Jinn, taking 600 of Seto's lifepoints.  She grinned at me, and I returned her smile half-heartedly.  This duel wasn't over yet.

            Seto's facedown card, Fissure, destroyed the Amphibian Beast.  He then summoned the Lord of Dragons and revealed his other facedown card, the Flute of Summoning Dragon.  My heart sank as I watched him pull two Blue Eyes White Dragons from his hand and place them on the field.  The holograms were huge, people were gathering to see the pair of dragons, who were glaring menacingly at my girlfriend.

            They attacked.

            I ran straight for her.  The blast hit her full force, and she fell back and slid across the floor, hitting the wall with a thud.  I helped her up as Seto cockily made his way over.

            I put my arm around her and she gripped my hand tightly.

            He looked at me, then at Nina.  "Foolish girl," he said.  "You should never have challenged me."  He turned to me.  "Coward.  You let your girlfriend duel for you?  She lost, and you still won't duel.  You're such a loser."

            I merely glared at him.  Nina looked up at me, then at him, then back at me. 

            "You're not going to do anything?" she asked me incredulously.  "Mokai- " she paused, and turned to my brother.  "You're blind, by the way," she said matter-of-factly, "because you don't recognize him."  She turned back to me.  "Mokuba," she said pointedly, "he insulted you, and you're not going to do anything?"

            I closed my eyes and sighed.  It was all over now.  I don't think I was angry.  Not at Nina, anyway.  She was just trying to help.

            I opened my eyes and looked at Seto.

            He was crying.

And I know

I may end up failing too

But I know

That you were just like me

With someone disappointed in you

            Seto left soon after that.  I was surprised he didn't make me go with him; it was a little past midnight.  He'd awkwardly offered me a ride, but I said I'd walk home later.  I was almost afraid to go home, honestly.

            Nina and I walked over to the bar and explained the whole thing to Kuja, er, Mai.  She just nodded.  "I always thought you looked very familiar...  I guess that complicated things... I'm sorry I sent him after you."

            "That's alright.  But I think I might just go home now."  I sighed, wondering what would happen.

            "I'll go with you, Mokuba," Nina said quietly.  "My house is a few minutes before yours, and I... I don't want you to feel alone."  She smiled weakly.  "I'm really sorry I told your brother.  I just...  I don't know..."

            I kissed her.

I've

Become so numb

I can't feel you there

Become so tired

So much more aware

I'm becoming this

All I want to do

Is be more like me

And be less like you    

            We walked home.  She got to her house safely, then it was just a few minutes before I was home.  Instead of going through the front door, I snuck around to the back and climbed back up the rope and through the window into my room.

            Seto was sitting on my bed.

            "Is that where you've been going?"

            I looked at him blankly, then slowly nodded.  I'd expected him to blow up over something like this.  "...Most of the time..."

            "Tell me next time, okay?"

            I sighed.  "Whatever."

            He looked at me and smiled.  "Good night," he said.  "I love you."

            I looked at my brother silently.  He stood up and walked toward the door.  I climbed into the bed.

            "Love you too," I said as he closed the door.

I've

Become so numb

I can't feel you there

Tired of being what you want me to be

I've

Become so numb

I can't feel you there

I'm tired of being what you want me to be

~fin~

A/N: It's over!  This is the last songfic I've written for now; I'm looking for a good song for a Seto/Tea fic and I've found like a billion.  Unfortunately, I can't figure out a good plot.  Anyway, I had to include the J/M bit because I'm obsessive.  It's really kinda sad.  *giggle*  "I knew that knucklehead liked me."  I'm one of those people who shouldn't have access to unsubbed Japanese and dubbed episodes at the same time.  I found 92 entertaining.

Anyway, since that had absolutely nothing to do with the actual fic...

Review.  And if you can find time, go read one of my other songfics and compare.  Personally, I think "Wanna Be" was kinda bad, but "I'm With You" was okay, and "12 Days of YuGiOh" was out of nowhere.  That was like a crossover songfic/songfilk. 

Now that I've finished shamelessly plugging, review.