Chapter VIII. Declarations and Relevations

It was only a minute, but it felt like forever.

Harry and Draco clung to each other, six and a half years of hate, fear, love and lust bottled in one desperate kiss. Suddenly it all made sense . They were exact opposites.

And they were exactly the same.

Slowly they parted, their eyes locking, green on grey, both searching for the right words.

"Harry.." Draco whispered.

"What, not Potter?" Harry smiled, breaking the tension.

Draco smiled back. "I have this habit of referring to one who knows my mouth intimately by their first name. Just good manners, you know." He continued before he lost his nerve.."I...I never knew you felt this way. Why would you want me, after all I have done to you, to your friends? I made your life miserable for nearly seven years. You are everything I wanted to be and was never allowed to even try. I hated you for it! Then I realized it was more than that. More than I wanted to admit." Draco cupped his hand under Harry's jaw, his thumb sliding gently over the tear that fell down the dark-haired boy's cheek.

Harry leaned closer to Draco. "We have fought for too long; fought each other, our feelings, our world", Harry spoke. "I don't want to fight anymore. I want to feel, to love, to break down without everyone saying 'Oh, look, the great Harry Potter, never thought he would finally snap, now did ya'.Well, you do if you see enough death, enough pain. And if you can't love the one you want, that you need..."

He dropped his head, his voice barely audible. "I don't want to be the hero anymore. I just want to be Harry. Not The-Fucking-Boy-Who- Happens-To-Survive-When-No-One-Else-Does."

Draco pulled Harry to him in a swift movement, his arms wrapped around the now sobbing Gryffindor.

"We'll find a way, Harry," he whispered.

Later that evening, Harry and Draco sat at a small wooden table in the back of the library, books piled on top of books, one falling every now and then with a thud when a fresh armload dropped onto the table. They had been at this for hours, looking for the counterspell that would free them from each other's memories. Harry was half-way through the fifty-seventh book when he jumped up from the chair.

"This is it! I found the spell I did that night."

Harry took the book, Ancient Incantations and Scarcely-Used Spells, around the table and laid it out in front of Draco.

"Reverso-Used most often as a form of punishment, it binds enemies by giving the memories of each person to the other. The cloud that erupts from the wand of the spell-caster envelops the victims momentarily, connecting them. Most often the receivers of the spell will be unable to handle the double onslaught of memories and emotions and eventually will go mad."

"Just a hop, skip, and a jump down that happy road, wouldn't you say?" Draco smiled.

"Shh." Harry shushed. "There's more.The only way to reverse the spell is to do just that. The caster and the receivers must return to the same place, at the same time, and repeat the EXACT same actions as when cast. Any variations will only intensify the spell, thus hastening the maddening effect."

"So," Draco realized. "We have to go back to the bloody tower, and JUMP?"

"It would appear so." Harry replied."And if we don't get it right..."

"We lose our ever-loving minds." Draco finished. "Hold on, what happens if you do the spell too soon, or too late, for the fall? Do we.."

"A trip to St. Mungo's at best, a trip to the morgue at worst." Harry interjected. "But, if we do this right, we're freed from the spell. And if we don't break it, we'll go mad anyway. Doesn't look like we have much of a choice."

Harry leaned closer to the silent blond. "Draco...Are you with me?"

"Yeah," he finally spoke. "Like you said, it's not like we have a choice. The irony is this all started because I didn't think I had anything to live for, and now.." he looked at Harry." I feel like I have everything to live for. I'm sorry you have to go through this."

"I'm not, " Harry proclaimed. "We would never have known how we felt if we didn't have those memories. We are connected now, we understand. Even if it goes horribly wrong on that tower, I will not regret what happened. You would have killed yourself, and who knows what I would have done eventually. We each got a second chance, Draco. And you and I, we have our first chance."

Draco glanced around the library. They had been so engrossed in finding the spell they didn't realize the time. It was now nearly ten o'clock, and everyone else was gone.

"Looks like no one noticed we were back here." Draco smiled. "It's just you and me."

Harry started to reply, but the words were cut short and muffled against Draco's eager mouth, the kiss deepening as the Slytherin fell back onto the chair and pulled the now moaning Gryffindor down to straddle his lap.

"Mmmmph, Hrry.." Draco finally mumbled.

"Mmhmm?"

Breaking the kiss, Harry looked into the finally sparkling ice eyes of the gorgeous blond.

"If I can walk," Draco grinned. "We need to, as the Muggles say, 'get a room'."

End of Chapter VIII.

A/N: Next chapter is titled Detonate. And for good reason. :)