Chapter2

I didn't know I had gone to sleep until Phoebe knocked on the door at seven thirty the next morning. The sun was up and the room was bright. And, Phoebe didn't look too well this morning. She had dark circles under her eyes and as she came closer, I could see she had little sweat beads on her upper lip.

"Are you awake? I'm sorry but I need some help today. Would you mind terribly?"

"No, not at all. It would be my pleasure. You have done so much for me that I would love to give you all the help I can." I jumped up out of bed and dressed in my old clothes. It looked as if Phoebe had washed them, and they even smelled of Lilacs.

" I need someone to go up in the attic and get down the baby things that are stored up there." She said.

"Well I'm dressed for the occasion." My overalls were a pair that Pa had ripped out and Ma and I repaired to fit me. I brushed and braided my hair then I put on my boots.

Phoebe stood there at the door for a second longer.

"Good. I'll have your breakfast in a minute. Come on down when you're ready" Phoebe turned to go and stopped. She grabbed the doorframe to steady herself. Then she looked back at me and said. "It won't be too soon either."

"Are you alright? Do I need to go get a midwife or someone? What am I to do?" I know I sounded panicked but I couldn't think at that moment.

"Millie, everything is going to be alright, You just do as I ask and we can get through this just fine."

She talked with such confidence that I really almost forgot for the moment that I was scared. I ate my breakfast and she sipped tea as we sat at the table in the kitchen. And I needed to ask her a question. The one that was burning a whole in my mind.

"Phoebe, is Sam sorry he brought me here? I didn't ask him to, he just took it upon himself. I was real scarred that morning and needed someone to help me and he was there."

"Millie, Sam is hurt real bad. Sarah was to have had a baby when she was killed. He just can't get over that he should have been there that day, instead he was here helping Cole foal the little chestnut stallion."

"How long has it been?" I needed to know, even if I was afraid of the answer. Something in me had to ask. My heart was doing funny flip-flops and I didn't know why.

"It'll be two years and two months on Friday. We were hoping that he would come out of it and find someone soon, but as it seems he has other ideas."

"Like what?"

"Like going after the guys who killed her and your Father."

"How did he know that it was the same guy who shot them both, and why?"

"That's something Sam is going to have to tell you, I know no details. And don't want to either, not right now."

"Are you sure you are alright?" I asked again.

" Yes. It's the pains, they come every twenty minutes and last just a second. Long enough to make me uncomfortable."

"Does that mean your time is close?"

"No, It means that I have at least a week left. This is the baby turning and it hurts a little."

After breakfast I followed her to the attic and climbed the latter. She wanted the crib and the cradle and a dresser. The dresser was a little difficult, but with Phoebe's help I got it down too. When we were through we took them all down to the back porch and looked them over. Phoebe announced that they could use a coat of paint. White was what she liked. So we started to sand them and smooth them for the paint. That was about the time Cole and Sam came in for lunch.

"What do we have here?" Cole asked.

"We are getting ready for a baby." Phoebe replied, batting her eyelashes.

"Are you sure you are getting ready or is it Millie? Looks like you have a slave there, and you with your feet up and drinking tea." He couldn't help teasing her. He could always get a rise out of her, and he loved her for it.

"Cole, I have not got a slave and you know it. I usually do everything myself, and besides every body is telling me to take it easy." Phoebe almost started to cry and Cole could see he really had upset her.

"Darling I'm sorry. You were right, Millie isn't your slave. Thank you Millie for helping Phoebe, she needs it."

"Oh, it's been fun. I've never been around babies before and I'm looking forward to helping. I mostly helped Pa repair things around the farm and Ma cook and bake, but babies were very few and far between."

"Good then I can get the fences finished before the wee one comes." Cole said with relief in his voice.

"Will you help me to our bedroom Cole? I need to lie down for a bit." Phoebe looked tired indeed. So Cole helped her upstairs.

I continued working on the cradle. A few minutes after they left, Sam walked up to the porch with an arm full of firewood. He tried to reach for the door and dropped half of the wood. I started to laugh and went to help pick up some of it. When he looked at me he had a frown on his face.

"I'm sorry, can I give you a hand?" I asked.

"Why, does it look like I'm helpless?" He shot back at me.

"No, But it is customary to give a helping hand to someone in need."

"Oh, I thought you might be ridiculing me. The way you look at me, I thought you may be thinking I'm incompetent."

"Why would I do that? I'm not that kind of person. You on the other hand are always saying things like you know me and know what I'm thinking. Let me tell you something right now. You don't know me, and you don't know what I'm thinking. Oh what's the use. I'm out of here." I had to leave because the tears were coming and I knew that they would not stop.

"Go ahead then. I'm tired of this too. Sam yelled to my back as I headed for the barn.

There I found old Mose. He had his own stall and the straw was clean and he also had grain and not hay. I reached for him and he came to me. Then as I stood there he pushed at my shoulder as if he missed me and was saying, "Where have you been?"

Then Sam came into the barn. I could tell he was looking for me. I wanted to hide from him, but I stood right where I was.

"I'm awfully sorry Millie. I'm not very good with people, and you hit me with wanting to help me and I'm not use to that."

I didn't say anything, but just stood there and cried. I could tell he was uncomfortable and I didn't care. He hurt me too many times in the short time I've known him. Everything that was normal to me was gone and I felt alone. Old Mose was my only link to home I had left. And he seemed too happy where he was. That hurt too.

"Millie? Are you all right? I said I'm sorry, will you please talk to me?" I could tell he was sincere.

"What do you want me to say? Haven't I said enough?" The hurt was still in my voice.

"I'm so use to being alone that it took me by supprise. And. you looked beautiful last night."

I couldn't say anything then. I just stood there and looked at him. He started to walk over to me, he started to reach for me. His hand was at my face when Cole came in and stopped it.

"Sam, would you go down to the White ranch and see if Mrs. White will come back with you?"

"Is everything all right?" I asked him.

"I think Phoebe will rest better if Mrs. White came by and saw her for a few minutes."

"Sure Cole I'll go now." Sam said as he started to saddle a Palomino. "Or should I take the buggy?"

"I think Mrs. White would appreciate the buggy Sam." Cole replied.

Cole and I turned to the house and went to check on Phoebe. She seemed fine, but the beads of sweat were there again. And that bothered me.

We talked about nothing imparticular and everything, just to keep Phoebe busy. She seemed uncomfortable and in slight pain, but holding up well for our sake. Cole was especially attentive to her. It showed how much he really loved her. It made me think that I would like to have a love like that someday.

It was maybe an hour and a half before Sam returned with Mrs. White. She was a kind lady. All business and very precise with her speech. Her hair was just now turning grey. She had light blue eyes, they were kind eyes.

"Now, shall we take a look at you my dear?" Was the first thing she said.

"Cole dear, will you please go downstairs and get the baby cradle that Millie was working on this morning?" Phoebe asked so it would get the men out of the way for a while.

"Got it, be right back." He said

"Take your time and have Sam help you bring in the fire wood, too." I replied.

"Men, they don't seem as strong as they appear. Do they?" Mrs. White asked us. We just looked at each other and smiled.

"Now let us see what is the problem? Do you have pain or is it just discomfort?"

"Well, it started out with some pain and then it turned to discomfort." Phoebe answered.

"How long has it been since it started?"

"It started last evening just before dinner, when I got a little upset at someone and I could tell that it wasn't a good idea to be so upset."

"Yes, well you are right there. And you are also right that the babies are getting ready to be born."

"BABIES?" Phoebe and I both said at the same time.

"Did you not know that you are going to have twins? That is why you are so large and uncomfortable dear." Mrs. White said calmly.

"No, I had no idea at all. The other two pregnancies were normal and full term. So I thought that was the reason why I'm so large. It's been only two years since my last was stillborn."

"Yes, yes, that is part of it. Your muscles are not as strong as they once were, and if it had been longer you would be feeling better right now. The more time between pregnancies the stronger you'd be health wise." Mrs. White explained to us. She included me in this conversation and Phoebe seemed to need me.

"May I ask you a question Mrs. White?" When she nodded her head I continued. "Will Phoebe be all right. I mean will her babies be in good health?"

"Yes, they are strong and moving quite a bit? I can tell by the look on your face Phoebe that I'm right." She said.

We just sat there for a while and took it all in. Phoebe had a smile on her face that nobody could wipe away. After about five minutes Mrs. White told Phoebe and I what should be done.

"Phoebe, you should go to bed and stay there for the rest of your time. Then when it gets closer have one of the boys come again and get me. I'll help with the birth." She told us. "Millie, your timing couldn't have been better. You can help by taking most of the household burden off of Phoebe's mind. And for my peace of mind also."

Just then the guys came to the door and knocked. Cole had a look on his face that was so downtrodden, it made you want to go give him a hug and tell him all is well. Which was exactly what I did.

"She's going to be fine. You go in to her and I'll get dinner ready and bring it upstairs." I told him. Then I motioned for Sam to follow me down to the kitchen.

"Is she really going to be ok?" He asked me.

"Yes, and we can help them both by doing what we can to make this time for them easier, don't you think?"

"Yes." Was all he said.

**************

The time passed slowly for Phoebe but not for the rest of us. We kept busy by getting the baby things ready and the house in shape for the arrival of the twins.

Cole and Sam built a new cradle and crib and dresser for the babies. Phoebe and I made new gowns and blankets and diapers. Phoebe called them nappies. I had never seen them before so I didn't know what they were until she told me.

Ma had taught me how to crochet collars for dresses and edges on pillowcases, so I crocheted around the baby blankets and on the sleeves of the gowns. Phoebe was real impressed and it delighted me to do something for her that she would remember me by.

Sam had taken me to town earlier in the week and I picked out some yarn that would fit for either a girl or boy or both and so I started to crochet two baby shawls as a gift. Sam said he would pay for it, if I made them and we could both give them to Cole and Phoebe and the babies when they arrived. I was happy to do it.

In secret I made a pretty nightgown for Phoebe and crocheted around the collar and sleeves. It was of white cotton material that was very thin and sheer. But for someone in bed with babies it didn't matter what it was made of. I've heard it said that women who were with child, were very beautiful no matter what stage they we at.

Cole took it upon himself to redecorate the nursery, and Phoebe was not to know. So when she was down for her afternoon nap, he went into the room with Sam and worked very quietly and fast because it was finished by the time both of the cribs and cradles and dressers were dry from being painted white.

Sam had even painted little ducks and lambs on the drawers of the dressers. It took me by supprise to see that he could be so kind. He didn't seem like the type to do that kind of work. But Sam was supprising me all the time now. He bought the dress for me, he bought the yarn for the babies and he painted the animals on the dressers. I was seeing a different Sam these days.

When I had finished the baby blankets and the gowns, I took them into Phoebe. She was so happy that she started to cry.

"Don't do that, I'll cry too." I said.

"Oh, Millie. How beautiful they are. They will be just right for a boy or girl. So it doesn't matter what I'm having. What workmanship, you are an artist. Thank you so much, I love them."

"You praise me too much. My Ma should get the credit for all this work. She took years teaching me how to do small stitches and not pull too tight on the thread and so on." We both started to laugh. Then Cole came into the room and wanted to know what we were cackeling about.

"Just look at what Millie did on the baby blankets and gowns." Her eyes were swimming with unshed tears.

"I've got an idea, how about I take you into the nursery and you and Millie can put all the baby's things where they belong." He said.

"Oh Cole, could you do that? I would just sit and tell Millie where I would like them to be in the drawers. Couldn't I?" She asked.

"As you wish my dear" Cole said as he scooped her up into his arms and walked to the nursery door.

" Oh" Was all Phoebe could say when we arrived at the door. The nursery was just the most beautiful room in the entire house. The walls were a pale yellow, with little lambs and ducks and dogs and dolls painted all around the room at child level. The work of Sam, I was sure.

" We have been a little busy and have neglected the stock. So, Sam and I are going to take care of them now. I'll be back at noon to take you back to our room." He said as he left us to our work.

By the time we were finished with placing all the babies items in the drawers of the dressers, Phoebe was looking real tired, and that was the time Cole came in to take her back to bed. I ran down to fix lunch for everyone, and took Phoebe and Cole's to them. Then I went into my room and got the baby shawls I had made. As I turned to go out of the room, there stood Sam with two little hand carved chicks. They had also been painted yellow, with orange feet and beaks.

"They are for the twins, and are to go with the blankets you made." He said. I noticed his ears were a little red in color. I suppose that he was slightly embarrassed.

"You are surprising me with all of your talent." I said.

"I loved to draw and paint when I was young, but our dad thought that just girls did that kind of thing. So I didn't let him know I was doing it to sell in town."

"This town? I asked.

"No. Your town."

"What?"

"It's a long story, and I'll tell you sometime soon."

"Why do I have to wait so long to hear this story?" I asked him.

"It takes longer than we have time for right now. I can't do it justice with a short version so I'll tell you later."

"If you say so." Was all I said, with disappointment.

"Oh! Did you paint that picture at the church of the shepherd and the flock of sheep?"

"Yes, I painted it and then I brought it to Mt. Oswego City just about the time your Ma was ill and then passed away. Because your Pa came by the church to set up funeral arrangements for someone which I'm guessing was for your Ma."

"Yes, about three and a half months now."

"That's what I'm thinking."

"It was the prettiest picture I've ever seen. I've not seen many. Your work is breath taking." I had to tell him how it made me feel.

We went on in that mode for some time. It seemed to help Phoebe with coping with the up coming birth and her nerves were settling down too. She wasn't crying all the time. Cole was great help in that department. He knew how to make her relax and enjoy anything and everything. With Sam and I not fighting and bickering, it made me see him in a whole different light. He was kind and thoughtful and he seemed to like me a little better too.

Just before bed Cole came into the Parlor and asked Sam to go get Mrs. White. He said Phoebe was in need of her help and for me to go strait upstairs to her. I ran as fast as I could and when I got to the bedroom door I slowed down. As I walked in Phoebe was getting a fresh gown on.

"Here, let me help you with this gown."

"Thank you. I really need the help. My water broke and it's all over the floor. You will have to clean it up Millie." She was starting go cry and I told her it was no trouble at all. That seemed to make her smile. "I'm so glad you are here with me, I've not had a close friend for a long time and you are a true friend."

"I only had Ma and Pa, so that is as close as I've had to a friend also." I told her.

By the time I had everything cleaned up and ready for Mrs. White, they were back and Cole was at Phoebe's side holding her hand and wiping her forehead with a cold wash cloth. Sam kept the water and the extra blankets warm by the fire in the kitchen. He seemed as nervous as Cole and me.

The night wore on and got later and later. I didn't think Phoebe could go on any longer, but she proved me wrong. She went on into the next day.

"Here's baby number one. Millie, take her to clean her up for her mama and daddy. Then I'm sure number two will be here when you return."

But number two had other ideas. She was a little bit later than Mrs. White thought. It took another four hours and twenty minutes before the next baby arrived. And the best thing about having to wait so long was, Phoebe was rested and ready by the time she was born.

Cole couldn't stop thanking Phoebe and Mrs. White, and they were too busy to hear what he was babbling about. I walked over to him and told him to go tell Sam that he was the proud Papa of two beautiful healthy baby girls. So off he went.

Mrs. White and I got Phoebe ready for a nap and fed her some broth, and left her to sleep for a little while.

It was that evening after dinner that we went back up to the bedroom to see how the new family was doing, when we discovered that Cole had moved the two cribs into their room so he could help with the night time feedings, and such.

"Well now Dears, have you come up with names for these two precious darlings?" Asked Mrs. White.

"Yes. Baby number one is Amanda and Baby number two is Amy, for my Mother and Grandmother." Said Phoebe.

We all got along and were very busy. It was about two weeks after the twins were born when Cole suggested we all go for a ride in the buggy. Sam rode the Palomino, he had ridden the first time I saw him. I sat in the last seat with Amy and Phoebe had Amanda in the front with Cole. We traveled to the cemetery that Sam and I stopped at on our way to Cole and Phoebe's Ranch. I had no clue as to why we were here. I soon found out.

"This is where the first two of our daughters are resting." Phoebe said.

I looked down at the two tiny graves and read the names.

Prudence Turner and the next one said Piper Turner. The dates on both were for the day they were born.

"Now we can go on and raise these two and remember the ones that rest in peace." Cole said.

"We don't need to mourn for them anymore, we can just know that they are safe. And be happy they will be taken care of for all time." Phoebe said softly.

I turned to say something to Sam and he was at another grave. So I walked over to him and looked at what this one said.

Sarah Elisabeth Williams Born 1874 Died 1894
Baby 1894

I just started to cry. Sam turned just then and gave me a look that said he wished I wasn't there. So I turned and ran as fast and far as I could go.

When I couldn't go any further I sat down where I was and cried for Sam's wife and baby and Ma and Pa and me. I felt all alone and sad, and miserable.