Disclaimer: All I own is the plot.
A/N. Gaaaa, I love all of you guys. *Eyes get all shiny and bright*
Ok, I'm done now, but seriously, thanks! Errr, some cussing
* Dally's POV*
*Right where we left off*
I had just been told that Ponyboy Curtis was cutting himself. Deliberately. Ponyboy was always the reasoning one, he wasn't supposed to be doing this. I kinda admire the kid for living in a neighborhood where you're expected to be a hood, and he was anything but a hood.
Now, I just didn't know. When kids like Pony start doing shit like this it throws things off.
I wondered if I looked as pale as I felt. I could remember New York. It
was hell, dark,cold,and alone. Nothing like this ever happened,though. It
was all fights, drug deals, and all that good stuff. I really had no idea
what to do.
" So, uh should we call him in?" I asked.
Soda's head jerked around at my direction, " Call him in?" he repeated hoarsely.
I licked my lips, " Yeah, I guess to tell him we know,"
" It might not be such a bad idea,"said Johnny
" What do I say? Oh hi Pony, by the way I know that you're cutting yourself?" Soda said
" Maybe not those exact words," suggested Two Bit
" I don't think he'll care what you say," said Steve.
Soda nodded
"Ok," he said
He got up from the table and stood in the kitchen doorway.
" Hey Pony, will you come in here?"
I heard a small noise as Pony got up from his position on the couch. He
calmly walked in and sat down in an empty chair. He looked at all of us,
as if challenging us to understand him.
" Pony, I need to know something," Soda began.
Pony just stared at him then nodded. Did that mean ok? I guess Soda thought it did because he then said.
" I know we've all noticed the scratches you've been getting."
Ponyboy was starting to sort of scare me. He didn't try to break from Soda's gaze, fidget around, or look ashamed. He just continued staring blankly and lifelessly.
" I thought you were just being absent minded, but I think there's something else."
Pony still didn't say a word.
" Darry and I've noticed you've been really distant lately,"
Pony shifted his gaze to the side for a second. Well, at least we're making progress.
"One of my razor blades was missing this morning," Soda said with a steady voice.
" Yes?" Pony said. His voice was hoarse and tired. Not like Pony at all.
" I honestly didn't mean to, but I saw a little bit of one of your poems,"
"Oh,"was all Pony said.
" It's taken me a while but I think I know what's going on,"
Pony narrowed his eyes and frowned. I could almost hear him condemning all of us for trying to understand him.
"Pony, come here," Soda told him.
Pony got up and walked over to Soda. Just like that. No objections or fights or anything.
Soda took hold of Pony's right arm and pushed the sleeves up. I heard a
gasp and saw that Two Bit was breathing heavily. Pony's arms were covered
in scars. I had never actually seen his arms when he got the scratches, and
now I'm damn glad I didn't. Thin purple red lines ran from his wrist
to his elbow. Several circles made a larger circle on his upper arm. On the crook of his elbow, the word why was written very faintly. Other lines and patterns ran over his arm. I could see the fresh scars and saw that one small gash that was still bleeding. I looked around at everyone. Well, mainly Steve. He doesn't really like Pony too much.
Steve looked like he was going to be sick. He kept staring at Pony's arm and blinking. Almost as if he wanted to erase the image from his mind.
" Is your other arm like this too?" whispered Soda.
Pony traced a finger over one of the lines on his wrist. He seemed calm, happy almost.
" Yes, it's like this one." he said.
" Pony? Why are you doing this to yourself?" asked Johnny.
Pony didn't say anything, then suddenly he said
" I have too,"
" What? Pony that's bullshit!" Steve shouted.
"Steve, calm down," Soda told him.
" Why the hell do you have to cut yourself, Pony?" I asked him.
He looked at me. His eyes were void, yet they were somehow scared like a small child's.
" Inner battles," I thought.
Zak, this guy I knew from New York, often referred to deep personal troubles as "inner battles." Zak was a pretty deep guy. Of course he was stoned most of the time, but even sober he was the smart one.
" I can't explain it to you," he said.
" Are you sure? We want to help," said Two Bit
" You wouldn't understand," Pony said and sighed
" Why not?" asked Steve.
" I told you, I can't explain it," said Pony softly.
" That has to upset you to do that," said Two Bit.
" No, not really," was Pony's quiet reply.
I remembered the calm happy look that was on Pony's face a few minutes ago. That memory upset me, and I don't know how to deal with emotions. I knew I
couldn't go out and jump someone, because that would just sink all of us in
further.
" You mean, you kinda like doing that?" I asked.
Pony just shrugged and looked off into space. I knew the answer was " yes", though.
" What happened to you, Pony?" asked Soda sadly.
" Nothing happened to me,"
" Nothing?" Steve grimaced and pointed to Pony's arm.
" I think that qualifies as something,"
" Kid, we just want to stop you before it gets out of hand," I said.
Pony laughed coldly and the sound sent shivers up my spine.
" How do you know it hasn't?" he asked in a challenging tone.
I couldn't believe my ears. This could not be Ponyboy Curtis. Soda and Darry's smart, nice, usually happy, little brother. It just couldn't be. Pony just sent a final glare around the room and left. A few seconds later, I heard the door close.
" I'm sorry, Soda," Johnny said.
" What happened to him?" Soda asked.
" That didn't seem like Pony at all," said Two Bit.
Hmmm, my thoughts exactly.
"It's not an act, is it?" asked Steve.
" No, I don't think it is," I told him
" Right now, I wish it was all just an act," said Soda
" We know, buddy," said Two Bit.
" Even though he's alive, he's already gone," Soda said disbelievingly.
" I know it's tough, but we can reach him if we work hard," said Johnny.
Everyone nodded in agreement. We all now had an unspoken goal. To help Ponyboy free himself from the darkness he was surrounded in. We didn't need to say it out loud, we all understood.
" Yeah, we can," I said.
Soda had a glare in his eyes, and I saw him blink out a few tears.
" We have to," he said in strangled and defiant voice.
" We have to," he whispered again.
A/N. How was it? I hope it wasn't bad.
Thanks for the great reviews once again.
Fyre
