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You're back! HALLO! Seeing how I actually got quite a few reviews on the first chapter, I decided to continue the fic! But be warned: there will be some YAOI in this chapter (as if there wasn't any in the first... ), so if you don't like that sort of thing, DON'T GO COMPLAINING TO ME ABOUT IT! We 'kay? We 'kay.
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Disclaimers: Aha... ha... ha. I own Yu Yu Hakusho. Yes I do. That's why I'm writing a fanfic about it. Just to make all of you jealous. BWAHA!!
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WAIT!!! Don't start reading yet!! I gotta say something!! :
Thank you, ARROW, for your suggestion! It was a damn good one! And I will use it! BWAHAHA! Now read.
^+^+^
"Are your feet really ugly?"
"Uh hu."
"So ugly this dog would eat them?"
"Uh hu."
"Then you need... THE SOCK." [1]
Several terribly unneeded commercials later, the Wheel of Yusuke logo appeared back on the television screen that you're not actually watching accompanied by the Wheel of Yusuke theme song that is so annoying it has actually sent viewers to asylums screaming for it to stop.
Back at the studio, Koenma was still trying to get Hiei, but the little fire demon was putting up a very good fight against it. When the "On Air" sign lit up, George the Oni gave a yelp and quickly stuck a "Please Stand By" sign (actually just a cue card he had scribbled on the back of) in front of the camera.
"Koenma, sir!!" George whispered loudly from behind the camera. "KOENMA!!!"
Koenma's head poked up from behind the podium. His hat and the hair underneath it were very disheveled and he was grinning widely.
"Sir, we're on the air!!"
Koenma shrugged in a nonchalant way and was about to duck behind the podium again when---
"KOKURYUHA!!"
---Hiei unleashed the Black Dragon. Koenma stumbled backwards, narrowly missing being obliterated, and the audience shrieked in terror and trampled each other to get out of the way.
"Someone save my dingo!" yelled a woman frantically, pointing to a pair of trousers that had been painted maroon.
Eventually, after much uproar and panic, the Dragon crashed through the studio wall and was gone (for now). Koenma, still a bit dazed from the whole ordeal, had come out with only a slightly charred hat. "GAH!" he screamed. "MY HAT IS SLIGHTLY CHARRED!!!"
Immediately, seven (yes, seven) make-up artists rushed on set and replaced the slightly charred hat with a brand new hat that looked exactly like the old one except not slightly charred in the least bit.
"Why thank you, make-up art---" Koenma stopped abruptly when he caught a look at the make-up artists. "Wait a minute... you seven make-up artists look awfully familiar... "
"No we don't," said one of the seven.
"You lie!" said another.
"IT'S SUZAKU!" screamed Yusuke, completely losing his head.
"No we're not!" said a make-up artist with shifty eyes.
"BWAHAHAHA!" said one who hadn't spoken yet. The other six hit him.
"We're just your friendly neighborhood Suzak---erm, make-up artists."
Koenma eyed them suspiciously with a look of suspiciousness in his suspicious brown eye, but then smiled happily and shook the hand of the nearest make-up artist.
"They seem cheery enough!" the young prince told whoever was listening to him.
The seven make-up artists said, "Excellent" and pressed the tips of their fingers together in a Mr. Burns fashion.
Yusuke, his mouth hanging open, was pointing at the make-up artists with a look of utter disbelief on his face.
SUDDENLY, before the plot could get too far off from the whole "Wheel of Yusuke" thing we've got going, Hiei's long-since-forgotten (or not) Black Dragon shot back through the hole it had made in the wall, swallowed up the seven "make-up artists", and exited through a different spot on the wall, leaving another gaping hole the size of a... of a... Black Dragon.
It was then that George realized the "Please Stand By" sign was still covering the camera and therefore more and more viewers were starting to drift away from their show. George took off the cue card with a sweatdrop. "And we're on!!"
"Hello, good, lovely, caring viewers," Koenma said in a voice that sounded almost normal but definitely WASN'T since he was still suffering from the SUPER-EXCLAMATION-MARK YAOI-CRAZED-FANCHILDREN DISEASE inflicted on him by Past-Tense Botan. "Welcome back to our show, Wheel of Yusuke. We encourage you to stay tuned to keep our ratings up---and for your own entertainment, of course. Please direct your undying attention towards our contestants. I'm not quite sure which of them is winning... but let's just say Hiei, since he's the cutest and the most murderous."
Hiei glared at Koenma so evilly that a couple of fanchildren's knees gave away and they fainted in pure bliss. Kurama was looking at Hiei fondly, while Kuwabara was... um, kind of just standing there, and Past-Tense Botan was dancing around and trying to touch her nose at the same time. All that you could see of Yusuke was the top of his head and his eyes, which were darting around nervously, no doubt looking for any more ex-enemies of his that were pretending to be make-up artists.
"Hiei, since the authoress is running out of ideas to further delay the start of our next round, I'm going to ask you to choose a category---"
BUT WAIT! Using Arrow's idea, the authoress... GOT AN IDEA!
"Excuse me, Koenma sir," came a very, very, very soft, tiny, small, quiet voice.
Everyone in the studio (excluding, of course, Kurama and Hiei, because... because) began to look around wildly for the source of the meek (oooo, another adjective!) voice. After a few minutes consisting of lots of confused whispers and head-snapping-whiplash-sounds, Hiei grew angry at the sheer stupidity of everyone.
"Oh for Inari's sake, she's standing in the doorway!"
There was a collective "Ooooh" from the group as they turned their attention to the large, obvious doorway that was wide open and letting in a draft.
"Hello," said Yukina the Ice Maiden with a small wave and a friendly smile. [2]
"Hello," said everyone besides Hiei (even Kurama, since he's friendly too).
There was a brief silence as everyone looked at Yukina, then she remembered that she had interrupted the continuation of Wheel of Yusuke for a reason besides the fact that DAMN was it fun.
"I... I was just wondering if Kazuma was here," said Yukina, and when Kuwabara started waving his arms around and yelling she held up a pair of pink boxers with kitties on them and said, "You left these in my room at Master Genkai's temple, Kazuma."
The color drained from Kuwabara's face. Kurama held a hand to his mouth delicately to stifle his chuckles, but the hand was soon used to restrain Hiei from killing Kuwabara right there on live television (live television... ).
"Hiei, no!!"
Yukina blinked twice. 'What's wrong with Hiei?' she thought. 'Perhaps Kazuma cheated on him?'
"Order, order!" yelled Koenma, slamming a tiny fist onto his podium. "Oooww... "
The pink boxers had long since been snatched by Kuwabara, but instead of leaving, Yukina settled herself between her brother and her admirer. Hiei was still shooting horrible death glares across Yukina to Kuwa, but he seemed much calmer now that he had been bound and gagged and probably tranquilized.
Koenma finished wrapping his slightly bruised hand in bandages and turned, once again, to the panel of contestants. What he took notice of, however, only further prevented the start of the game. His eyes grew big: Hiei... bound and gagged... The SUPER-EXCLAMATION-MARK YAOI-CRAZED-FANCHILDREN DISEASE kicked in and the Reikai prince found himself drooling.
Hiei suddenly felt a hungry pair of bright eyes staring at him. Bright GREEN eyes. And then he noticed that Koenma was looking at him too. He let out a series of muffled mutterings that, had there not been a gag in his mouth, would have said, "Stupid fox. Stupid Reikai prince."
A peach flew across the stage from behind the camera and hit Koenma in the head, thus bringing him temporarily out of his stupor. He started and looked around suspiciously, but only saw George the Oni avoiding eye contact and whistling quite innocently while casually kicking a stack full of peaches out of view. Baffled over who had hit him, Koenma ahem-ed and FINALLY returned to his game show hosting duties.
"IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII WAS BOTAN!" yelled Past-Tense Botan, who actually hadn't had a line yet in this chapter, and who normally won't shut up.
"And I'm your host, Koenma, reminding you that the choices you make today help to shape your world tomorrow." There was a communal cringe as some members of the studio audience remembered their own Middle-School-Guidance- Counselors-Touchy-Feely Days. There was a second cringe as the Middle- School-Attendees remembered that they'd soon have to go BACK to their own Middle-School-Guidance-Counselors-Touchy-Feely Days. Ah, summer. HEY I LOST MY CHIP!!! Oh, there it is.
... Ah, summer.
Er... what was I doing?? STUPID CHIP!! You made me lose my train of thought! Right, then.
"Seeing how Hiei is---" Drool, drool. "---currently bound and gagged and therefore incapable of selecting our next category, we'll move on to Past- Tense Botan."
Past-Tense Botan was idly twiddling her thumbs and staring directly into a blinding light fixture.
"Past-Tense Botan?" Pause. "PAST-TENSE BOTAN!!!"
"Wha... ?" She rubbed her eyes and blinked several times. "Woah... spots... "
"Kindly choose a category, you disgusting member of the opposite gender." Koenma said, taking out a nail file and randomly filing his nails even though he doesn't have any nails. "... AHH!! MY SKIN!!"
"I had chosen 'Who's a Muckluck?' [3] for 1,023," said Past-Tense Botan, her eyes crossed.
Koenma applied a band-aid to his freshly-filed fingertip (always avoid alliteration, ya wild kid, ya!) before responding to Past-Tense Botan. "Since 1,023 is not a valid amount of points, we're just going to go with 509." Koenma read the card marked "509." "It's multiple choice. Who is a Muckluck? A) Koenma B) Lord Koenma C) Koenma-Sama D) That freaky-looking baboon that hangs around outside of the studio and waits to pounce George the Oni every day after filming."
Outside the studio, a baboon lit up a cigar and leaned back against the outside wall.
Back inside the studio, the panel of contestants were thinking hard (or hardly thinking) about the pressing question. Hiei, who had been fighting against the restraining bonds, now gave up with a muffled sigh. Kurama, who could have easily answered the question, was a bit too busy teasing Hiei to really care about the Wheel of Yusuke anymore.
Kuwabara was giggling insanely at Yukina, who hadn't noticed him and was instead looking at Hiei and wondering if all that repressed anger would someday turn him into a horrible green monster named the Hulk. Hm... maybe she would make a comic out of that some day.
Past-Tense Botan was muttering to herself and every once in a while she would hit her head and mutter, "Quiet, brain, or I'll stab you with a Q- tip." [3] She was deep in thought over this completely perplexing inquiry.
Yusuke, however, was SO utterly distracted from reality as he thought about what the answer could POSSIBLY BE, that he leaned forward onto his podium and accidentally rested his elbow on the buzzer.
"Yes, Yusuke?" Koenma said in what sounded like a tired voice, but definitely WASN'T because he was still contaminated by the SUPER- EXCLAMATION-MARK YAOI-CRAZED-FANCHILDREN DISEASE, courtesy of Past-Tense Botan, thank you very much.
"Huh?!" said Yusuke, looking around and wondering who was calling him.
"You buzzed in," Koenma said flatly.
"That's not fair! I wasn't ready!"
"*YOU* HIT THE BUZZER, MORON!"
"Injustice!! I---what?"
Koenma pushed a large button that created a loud "YOU'RE WRONG" song to echo throughout the studio. "Whoops, sorry, you ran out of time. Guess we'll have to deduct points."
"But I don't have any---"
"SILENCE FOOL!"
Everyone got very silent, even Kurama, who was purring to Hiei seductively. You just don't mess with a two-foot toddler who needs Aspirin. Or Extra- Strength Tylenol or something.
Or Advil Liquid-Gel. Mmmmm... Liquid-Gel...
Suddenly a fanchild in the audience stood up and shouted, "I LOVE YOU, KOENMA!"
Koenma took out a gun and shot her.
"Now, if we could PLEASE just resume the game show---"
But the fates hated Koenma that day, and the studio doors once more burst open. Everyone (gosh, people are dying off so quickly, aren't they?) snapped their heads in the direction of the interrupter, but didn't see anything. And YES, reader, they WERE looking in the right spot this time. You can't fool fools twice in a row. It just doesn't work like that.
"GASP!" yelled another fanchild. "There's, like, TOTALLY no one there!!"
The people in the studio who weren't Kurama or Hiei became very fearful. After all, doors don't just open by themselves. This is stated in Newton's first law of physics---OH MY GOD NOT SCIENCE CLASS NOOOOO.
Koenma cleared his throat to get the audience's attention. "OBVIOUSLY, there is no one there, so if we could start up the second round of Wheel of Yusuke, that'd be good, yah." He took his place behind his podium (not like he had ever left his place behind his podium) and said to the contestants, "Would anyone ELSE like to guess at the multiple choice question?? Anyone? Anyone at all??"
Yukina, in her fright, had moved VERY close to Kuwabara, and therefore neither of their minds were really on the task at hand. Hiei was fuming behind his gag and Kurama was pretty damn preoccupied in holding Hiei closer to him and farther away from Kuwa.
Yusuke had once again become very paranoid. He kept thinking that an ex- enemy had entered through the doorway when the doors opened. He was muttering things like, "Toguro... you'll never get me, Toguro... NEVER! BWAHAHA!"
In fact, Past-Tense Botan was the only panelist who was actually pondering the question, so you KNOW it was pointless to even continue.
Suddenly, a voice filled the studio even though it spoke in what sounded like a hiss.
"Kurama... "
Kurama jumped and looked around, wide-eyed. That voice... it couldn't be... it WASN'T...
It was. Out of the shadows where he had blended in perfectly with his mostly black outfit stepped a very familiar favorite character of mine. Those who knew the man gasped and pointed and sputtered and choked and a few of the fanchildren swooned. Kurama gasped.
"KARASU!!!!!!!"
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I couldn't resist!! I LOVE KARASUUUUU!!!!
[1] - Ah... that was a commercial for the Posey R'ODonald show that my friend Alanna and I filmed years ago. Why it showed up in my fanfic, I don't know.
[2] - Did I mention that the wonderful idea of Yukina entering into Wheel of Yusuke was suggested by Arrow?? I take no credit for the idea.
[3] - THE SIMPSOOOOONS! Both of these (yes, if you'll notice there are TWO bracket-thingies labeled "3") are quotes from The Simpsons, which is super good. Krusty the Klown: It's not about dirty words. It's about words that SOUND dirty, like Muckluck.
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Thank you for reading Wheel of Yusuke. Please wait until the chapter comes to a complete stop and then exit to your left and review the fanfic. Enjoy the rest of your stay and remember the choices you make today help to shape your world tomorrow.
... AHHHH!!! GUIDANCE COUNSELOR-NESS!!!
You're back! HALLO! Seeing how I actually got quite a few reviews on the first chapter, I decided to continue the fic! But be warned: there will be some YAOI in this chapter (as if there wasn't any in the first... ), so if you don't like that sort of thing, DON'T GO COMPLAINING TO ME ABOUT IT! We 'kay? We 'kay.
^+^+^
Disclaimers: Aha... ha... ha. I own Yu Yu Hakusho. Yes I do. That's why I'm writing a fanfic about it. Just to make all of you jealous. BWAHA!!
^+^+^
WAIT!!! Don't start reading yet!! I gotta say something!! :
Thank you, ARROW, for your suggestion! It was a damn good one! And I will use it! BWAHAHA! Now read.
^+^+^
"Are your feet really ugly?"
"Uh hu."
"So ugly this dog would eat them?"
"Uh hu."
"Then you need... THE SOCK." [1]
Several terribly unneeded commercials later, the Wheel of Yusuke logo appeared back on the television screen that you're not actually watching accompanied by the Wheel of Yusuke theme song that is so annoying it has actually sent viewers to asylums screaming for it to stop.
Back at the studio, Koenma was still trying to get Hiei, but the little fire demon was putting up a very good fight against it. When the "On Air" sign lit up, George the Oni gave a yelp and quickly stuck a "Please Stand By" sign (actually just a cue card he had scribbled on the back of) in front of the camera.
"Koenma, sir!!" George whispered loudly from behind the camera. "KOENMA!!!"
Koenma's head poked up from behind the podium. His hat and the hair underneath it were very disheveled and he was grinning widely.
"Sir, we're on the air!!"
Koenma shrugged in a nonchalant way and was about to duck behind the podium again when---
"KOKURYUHA!!"
---Hiei unleashed the Black Dragon. Koenma stumbled backwards, narrowly missing being obliterated, and the audience shrieked in terror and trampled each other to get out of the way.
"Someone save my dingo!" yelled a woman frantically, pointing to a pair of trousers that had been painted maroon.
Eventually, after much uproar and panic, the Dragon crashed through the studio wall and was gone (for now). Koenma, still a bit dazed from the whole ordeal, had come out with only a slightly charred hat. "GAH!" he screamed. "MY HAT IS SLIGHTLY CHARRED!!!"
Immediately, seven (yes, seven) make-up artists rushed on set and replaced the slightly charred hat with a brand new hat that looked exactly like the old one except not slightly charred in the least bit.
"Why thank you, make-up art---" Koenma stopped abruptly when he caught a look at the make-up artists. "Wait a minute... you seven make-up artists look awfully familiar... "
"No we don't," said one of the seven.
"You lie!" said another.
"IT'S SUZAKU!" screamed Yusuke, completely losing his head.
"No we're not!" said a make-up artist with shifty eyes.
"BWAHAHAHA!" said one who hadn't spoken yet. The other six hit him.
"We're just your friendly neighborhood Suzak---erm, make-up artists."
Koenma eyed them suspiciously with a look of suspiciousness in his suspicious brown eye, but then smiled happily and shook the hand of the nearest make-up artist.
"They seem cheery enough!" the young prince told whoever was listening to him.
The seven make-up artists said, "Excellent" and pressed the tips of their fingers together in a Mr. Burns fashion.
Yusuke, his mouth hanging open, was pointing at the make-up artists with a look of utter disbelief on his face.
SUDDENLY, before the plot could get too far off from the whole "Wheel of Yusuke" thing we've got going, Hiei's long-since-forgotten (or not) Black Dragon shot back through the hole it had made in the wall, swallowed up the seven "make-up artists", and exited through a different spot on the wall, leaving another gaping hole the size of a... of a... Black Dragon.
It was then that George realized the "Please Stand By" sign was still covering the camera and therefore more and more viewers were starting to drift away from their show. George took off the cue card with a sweatdrop. "And we're on!!"
"Hello, good, lovely, caring viewers," Koenma said in a voice that sounded almost normal but definitely WASN'T since he was still suffering from the SUPER-EXCLAMATION-MARK YAOI-CRAZED-FANCHILDREN DISEASE inflicted on him by Past-Tense Botan. "Welcome back to our show, Wheel of Yusuke. We encourage you to stay tuned to keep our ratings up---and for your own entertainment, of course. Please direct your undying attention towards our contestants. I'm not quite sure which of them is winning... but let's just say Hiei, since he's the cutest and the most murderous."
Hiei glared at Koenma so evilly that a couple of fanchildren's knees gave away and they fainted in pure bliss. Kurama was looking at Hiei fondly, while Kuwabara was... um, kind of just standing there, and Past-Tense Botan was dancing around and trying to touch her nose at the same time. All that you could see of Yusuke was the top of his head and his eyes, which were darting around nervously, no doubt looking for any more ex-enemies of his that were pretending to be make-up artists.
"Hiei, since the authoress is running out of ideas to further delay the start of our next round, I'm going to ask you to choose a category---"
BUT WAIT! Using Arrow's idea, the authoress... GOT AN IDEA!
"Excuse me, Koenma sir," came a very, very, very soft, tiny, small, quiet voice.
Everyone in the studio (excluding, of course, Kurama and Hiei, because... because) began to look around wildly for the source of the meek (oooo, another adjective!) voice. After a few minutes consisting of lots of confused whispers and head-snapping-whiplash-sounds, Hiei grew angry at the sheer stupidity of everyone.
"Oh for Inari's sake, she's standing in the doorway!"
There was a collective "Ooooh" from the group as they turned their attention to the large, obvious doorway that was wide open and letting in a draft.
"Hello," said Yukina the Ice Maiden with a small wave and a friendly smile. [2]
"Hello," said everyone besides Hiei (even Kurama, since he's friendly too).
There was a brief silence as everyone looked at Yukina, then she remembered that she had interrupted the continuation of Wheel of Yusuke for a reason besides the fact that DAMN was it fun.
"I... I was just wondering if Kazuma was here," said Yukina, and when Kuwabara started waving his arms around and yelling she held up a pair of pink boxers with kitties on them and said, "You left these in my room at Master Genkai's temple, Kazuma."
The color drained from Kuwabara's face. Kurama held a hand to his mouth delicately to stifle his chuckles, but the hand was soon used to restrain Hiei from killing Kuwabara right there on live television (live television... ).
"Hiei, no!!"
Yukina blinked twice. 'What's wrong with Hiei?' she thought. 'Perhaps Kazuma cheated on him?'
"Order, order!" yelled Koenma, slamming a tiny fist onto his podium. "Oooww... "
The pink boxers had long since been snatched by Kuwabara, but instead of leaving, Yukina settled herself between her brother and her admirer. Hiei was still shooting horrible death glares across Yukina to Kuwa, but he seemed much calmer now that he had been bound and gagged and probably tranquilized.
Koenma finished wrapping his slightly bruised hand in bandages and turned, once again, to the panel of contestants. What he took notice of, however, only further prevented the start of the game. His eyes grew big: Hiei... bound and gagged... The SUPER-EXCLAMATION-MARK YAOI-CRAZED-FANCHILDREN DISEASE kicked in and the Reikai prince found himself drooling.
Hiei suddenly felt a hungry pair of bright eyes staring at him. Bright GREEN eyes. And then he noticed that Koenma was looking at him too. He let out a series of muffled mutterings that, had there not been a gag in his mouth, would have said, "Stupid fox. Stupid Reikai prince."
A peach flew across the stage from behind the camera and hit Koenma in the head, thus bringing him temporarily out of his stupor. He started and looked around suspiciously, but only saw George the Oni avoiding eye contact and whistling quite innocently while casually kicking a stack full of peaches out of view. Baffled over who had hit him, Koenma ahem-ed and FINALLY returned to his game show hosting duties.
"IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII WAS BOTAN!" yelled Past-Tense Botan, who actually hadn't had a line yet in this chapter, and who normally won't shut up.
"And I'm your host, Koenma, reminding you that the choices you make today help to shape your world tomorrow." There was a communal cringe as some members of the studio audience remembered their own Middle-School-Guidance- Counselors-Touchy-Feely Days. There was a second cringe as the Middle- School-Attendees remembered that they'd soon have to go BACK to their own Middle-School-Guidance-Counselors-Touchy-Feely Days. Ah, summer. HEY I LOST MY CHIP!!! Oh, there it is.
... Ah, summer.
Er... what was I doing?? STUPID CHIP!! You made me lose my train of thought! Right, then.
"Seeing how Hiei is---" Drool, drool. "---currently bound and gagged and therefore incapable of selecting our next category, we'll move on to Past- Tense Botan."
Past-Tense Botan was idly twiddling her thumbs and staring directly into a blinding light fixture.
"Past-Tense Botan?" Pause. "PAST-TENSE BOTAN!!!"
"Wha... ?" She rubbed her eyes and blinked several times. "Woah... spots... "
"Kindly choose a category, you disgusting member of the opposite gender." Koenma said, taking out a nail file and randomly filing his nails even though he doesn't have any nails. "... AHH!! MY SKIN!!"
"I had chosen 'Who's a Muckluck?' [3] for 1,023," said Past-Tense Botan, her eyes crossed.
Koenma applied a band-aid to his freshly-filed fingertip (always avoid alliteration, ya wild kid, ya!) before responding to Past-Tense Botan. "Since 1,023 is not a valid amount of points, we're just going to go with 509." Koenma read the card marked "509." "It's multiple choice. Who is a Muckluck? A) Koenma B) Lord Koenma C) Koenma-Sama D) That freaky-looking baboon that hangs around outside of the studio and waits to pounce George the Oni every day after filming."
Outside the studio, a baboon lit up a cigar and leaned back against the outside wall.
Back inside the studio, the panel of contestants were thinking hard (or hardly thinking) about the pressing question. Hiei, who had been fighting against the restraining bonds, now gave up with a muffled sigh. Kurama, who could have easily answered the question, was a bit too busy teasing Hiei to really care about the Wheel of Yusuke anymore.
Kuwabara was giggling insanely at Yukina, who hadn't noticed him and was instead looking at Hiei and wondering if all that repressed anger would someday turn him into a horrible green monster named the Hulk. Hm... maybe she would make a comic out of that some day.
Past-Tense Botan was muttering to herself and every once in a while she would hit her head and mutter, "Quiet, brain, or I'll stab you with a Q- tip." [3] She was deep in thought over this completely perplexing inquiry.
Yusuke, however, was SO utterly distracted from reality as he thought about what the answer could POSSIBLY BE, that he leaned forward onto his podium and accidentally rested his elbow on the buzzer.
"Yes, Yusuke?" Koenma said in what sounded like a tired voice, but definitely WASN'T because he was still contaminated by the SUPER- EXCLAMATION-MARK YAOI-CRAZED-FANCHILDREN DISEASE, courtesy of Past-Tense Botan, thank you very much.
"Huh?!" said Yusuke, looking around and wondering who was calling him.
"You buzzed in," Koenma said flatly.
"That's not fair! I wasn't ready!"
"*YOU* HIT THE BUZZER, MORON!"
"Injustice!! I---what?"
Koenma pushed a large button that created a loud "YOU'RE WRONG" song to echo throughout the studio. "Whoops, sorry, you ran out of time. Guess we'll have to deduct points."
"But I don't have any---"
"SILENCE FOOL!"
Everyone got very silent, even Kurama, who was purring to Hiei seductively. You just don't mess with a two-foot toddler who needs Aspirin. Or Extra- Strength Tylenol or something.
Or Advil Liquid-Gel. Mmmmm... Liquid-Gel...
Suddenly a fanchild in the audience stood up and shouted, "I LOVE YOU, KOENMA!"
Koenma took out a gun and shot her.
"Now, if we could PLEASE just resume the game show---"
But the fates hated Koenma that day, and the studio doors once more burst open. Everyone (gosh, people are dying off so quickly, aren't they?) snapped their heads in the direction of the interrupter, but didn't see anything. And YES, reader, they WERE looking in the right spot this time. You can't fool fools twice in a row. It just doesn't work like that.
"GASP!" yelled another fanchild. "There's, like, TOTALLY no one there!!"
The people in the studio who weren't Kurama or Hiei became very fearful. After all, doors don't just open by themselves. This is stated in Newton's first law of physics---OH MY GOD NOT SCIENCE CLASS NOOOOO.
Koenma cleared his throat to get the audience's attention. "OBVIOUSLY, there is no one there, so if we could start up the second round of Wheel of Yusuke, that'd be good, yah." He took his place behind his podium (not like he had ever left his place behind his podium) and said to the contestants, "Would anyone ELSE like to guess at the multiple choice question?? Anyone? Anyone at all??"
Yukina, in her fright, had moved VERY close to Kuwabara, and therefore neither of their minds were really on the task at hand. Hiei was fuming behind his gag and Kurama was pretty damn preoccupied in holding Hiei closer to him and farther away from Kuwa.
Yusuke had once again become very paranoid. He kept thinking that an ex- enemy had entered through the doorway when the doors opened. He was muttering things like, "Toguro... you'll never get me, Toguro... NEVER! BWAHAHA!"
In fact, Past-Tense Botan was the only panelist who was actually pondering the question, so you KNOW it was pointless to even continue.
Suddenly, a voice filled the studio even though it spoke in what sounded like a hiss.
"Kurama... "
Kurama jumped and looked around, wide-eyed. That voice... it couldn't be... it WASN'T...
It was. Out of the shadows where he had blended in perfectly with his mostly black outfit stepped a very familiar favorite character of mine. Those who knew the man gasped and pointed and sputtered and choked and a few of the fanchildren swooned. Kurama gasped.
"KARASU!!!!!!!"
^+^+^
I couldn't resist!! I LOVE KARASUUUUU!!!!
[1] - Ah... that was a commercial for the Posey R'ODonald show that my friend Alanna and I filmed years ago. Why it showed up in my fanfic, I don't know.
[2] - Did I mention that the wonderful idea of Yukina entering into Wheel of Yusuke was suggested by Arrow?? I take no credit for the idea.
[3] - THE SIMPSOOOOONS! Both of these (yes, if you'll notice there are TWO bracket-thingies labeled "3") are quotes from The Simpsons, which is super good. Krusty the Klown: It's not about dirty words. It's about words that SOUND dirty, like Muckluck.
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Thank you for reading Wheel of Yusuke. Please wait until the chapter comes to a complete stop and then exit to your left and review the fanfic. Enjoy the rest of your stay and remember the choices you make today help to shape your world tomorrow.
... AHHHH!!! GUIDANCE COUNSELOR-NESS!!!
