DISCLAIMER- I don't own Star Trek, but I do own the holiday. Without me, this holiday wouldn't exist. Don't worry, it'll make sense further on.

REVIEWER NOTES

Empress Leia- *Gives you dots*? What's that mean? I can't wait for your graduation story! It sounds like it's about Kirk and the rest graduating from Starfleet Academy. That would be funny! Continue your Survivor story!

Lorlie- Thanks for letting me use the Reese's idea. It's working out great. I've made two chapters so far.

Taskemus- You can picture this in an actual episode? Woah. That would be one weird show. The props are already sad enough. But the transporter glitter.........

Tavia- Thanks for reviewing! I love the new title for React. Chicken Noodle Soup for the Trekkie Soul. It's great! Especially the reference to chicken noodle soup, hee hee.

(A/N- You thought I was done with this story, huh? I'm back! Now it's a different holiday, one that takes place on July 2.)

CHAPTER 3 In Which Everyone Is Invited To A Meeting

Narrator- The scene is Kirk's room. He's lying on his bed. McCoy knocks on the door.

Kirk- Zzzzzzzzz. Huh? Go away.

McCoy- No! Let me in!

Kirk- I just had three pieces of cake, 35 jelly beans, and two glasses of beer. I'm tired!

McCoy- It's important!

Kirk- (Perks up) Are we being attacked by someone insane, evil, or out for revenge?

McCoy- We will be if you don't let me in.

Kirk- Okay!

Narrator- Kirk tells the computer to open the door.

Kirk- Computer, open the door.

Computer- Zzzzzzzzzzzz.

Kirk- Even the computer's asleep!

McCoy- I didn't know computers slept.

Kirk- Maybe they recharge their energy cells or something.

McCoy- *Soooo*..... How do I get in?

Kirk- Open the door!

McCoy- How? The computer's asleep!

Kirk- You open it with your hands! Haven't you ever opened doors manually?

McCoy- I think so, but it's been awhile.

Narrator- McCoy shoves the door open and comes inside.

Kirk- Have you ever thought that people rely too much on computers? That maybe people are getting lazy and we should dump the computers and do all the work ourselves?

McCoy- No.

Kirk- Neither have I.

Narrator- *I* have. All except the "do all the work ourselves" part. We should just hire robots.

McCoy- Robots *are* computers. Sort of.

Narrator- Oh. Then we should just get slaves.

McCoy- Slavery is illegal.

Narrator- So what?

McCoy- Ooooh, Is the narrator breaking the law? Tsk, tsk.

Kirk- Anyway, what was that thing you were saying, Bones? About someone who was evil, insane or out for revenge?

McCoy- Oh yeah! (Looks serious) I just found out that the Author's birthday is tomorrow.

Kirk- Author? Oh! You mean PearlGirl-

McCoy- (interrupting) Shhhhhh!

Kirk- Why?

McCoy- Well, I was talking to Alania-

Kirk- Alania?

McCoy- Arrrrgh! That's her sister, okay?

Kirk- Okay, I get it!

McCoy- And she said that PearlGirl's birthday is coming up.

Kirk- (groans) Don't tell me. You want to do something for her birthday.

McCoy- Hey, it's not like I *want* to work overtime, but who knows what she'll do if we don't?

Kirk- Is she the evil, insane, and out for revenge person?

McCoy- Yup.

(dramatic pause)

Kirk- Sooooooo...... What do we do?

McCoy- Let's see. We need food, games and a room to have it in.

Kirk- We can just replicate food, and we'll use the mess hall. But I don't know about games.

McCoy- Let's call a meeting in the conference room.

Kirk- Who should I say has to come?

McCoy- Everyone who's important.

Kirk- But some red-shirts *think* that they're important!

McCoy- Say anyone without a red shirt.

Kirk- But Scotty wears red!

McCoy- Say that ensigns are banned.

Kirk- But then Yeoman Rand will come!

McCoy- I thought you liked Yeoman Rand.

Kirk- Oh yeah. I did, didn't I?

McCoy- Well, she's pretty useless unless you want coffee. Say you can only come if you have a name besides Red-shirt.

Kirk- But then that stupid, clumsy, curious ensign with the forgettable name will come!

McCoy- Oh! We certainly don't want him! Say that there's a monster in the conference room. That way no ensign will want to come.

Kirk- But Chekov and Sulu might not want to come either!

McCoy- Arrrgh! I don't know! You're the captain! You figure it out!

Kirk- But captains are supposed to be brave and kill people! Figuring out how not to include people in a meeting isn't in the job description!

McCoy- I'm a doctor, Jim, not a invitation! Just do it! And make sure PearlGirl doesn't find out! It should be a surprise.

Narrator- McCoy leaves.

Kirk- (grumbles) Ugh. What do I do? I know!

Narrator- Kirk happens to find a loud speaker in his room.

Kirk- (into loud speaker) Whoever has made an appearance and said lines in any of PearlGirl's stories, please report to the conference room.

Narrator- You have to say *which* conference room!

Kirk- How many conference rooms do we have?

Narrator- Uhhhhhhhh......

Kirk- (into loud speaker) Just be there, Okay?

Narrator- Kirk turns off the speaker. Then we move to the next scene. We see a conference room that is stuffed with people. There's, let's see if I can list them: Kirk, Chekov, Spock, Sulu, Uhura, Scotty, McCoy, Nurse Chapel, Yeoman Rand, Ensign......?

Snodgrass- It's SNODGRASS!!! Why does everyone forget?!

Narrator- Where was I? Ensign Snodgrass, PearlGirl, Q, Dr. Death, UBP, and replicas of Kirk, Sulu, Spock, McCoy, Chekov and Uhura, that are about 6 years old.

Kirk- What??? What are you all doing here?

PearlGirl- You said anyone who has made an appearance and said any lines.

Kirk- I didn't mean all these people!

Dr. Death- Well, SORRY! I have more important things to do anyway.

McCoy- Dare I ask what?

Dr. Death- It's an experiment that will-, wait. I can't tell you. It's a secret. But you can come with me and try it out.

McCoy- I don't think so.

Kirk- Everybody LEAVE!!!!

Q- I don't *want* to go! I want to stay and embarrass you!

PearlGirl- Too bad! I say everyone goes but the Enterprise crew!

All who aren't the Enterprise crew-Fine! (stick out tongues)

Narrator- They all leave. Now we just have PearlGirl, McCoy, Kirk, Chekov, Sulu, Ensign whatever, Spock, Yeoman Rand, Nurse Chapel, Scotty and Uhura.

Chapel- Unless I'm really needed, I'd better go. There are some red-shirted ensigns in need of surgery!

Kirk- You can leave.

Narrator- Chapel leaves.

McCoy- I don't see why she bothers fixing them up. They just come back the next day with another life-threatening problem. There's no point!

Spock- It is her job to save people from dying. As is yours, doctor.

McCoy- Yeah, but with people who are going to die anyway.....

Spock- All people die.

McCoy- But the next *day*?

Spock- It is not possible to know when someone is going to die. You could die tomorrow. It is a possibility.

McCoy- You just don't understand the power of red-shirts!

Spock- That is correct. I do not.

PearlGirl- Why'd you call this meeting anyway? Besides to listen to Bones and Spock argue.

Kirk- *You're* here?!

PearlGirl- Ummm.... *yeaahh*!

Kirk- We're not doing *anything*! Nothing interesting whatsoever! You can leave.

PearlGirl- No! I'm not leaving!

McCoy- But you said all who isn't the Enterprise crew has to leave! You're not part of the crew!

PearlGirl- Phooey!

Kirk- Good one, Bones!

PearlGirl- All right. But you haven't seen the last of me! I'll be back to find out what you're doing if it's the last thing I do! Muahahahahaha!!

Narrator- PearlGirl leaves.

Kirk- Good. She almost found out what we're doing!

Sulu- What *are* we doing?

McCoy- We're planning a celebration for her. It's her birthday tomorrow.

Chekov- We could have a Russian party!

(Pause)

All but Spock & Chekov- I don't think so.

Chekov- (pouting) Nobody appreciates Russia.

Sulu- And this is a bad thing?

Rand- Would anybody like some coffee?

(Pause)

Sulu- What'd you do to it?

Rand- What do you mean by *that*?

Kirk- Not right now, thank you.

McCoy- Does anyone have any suggestions for the party?

Uhura- Ooo! I LOVE planning things! Let me do it!

Kirk- No. I'm the captain.

Uhura- (sticks out tongue) Well humf!

Kirk- But if you have any ideas......

Scotty- In Scotland we have ye drink as many shot glasses are you are old!

Kirk- That would be...... a lot. She's in her teens.

McCoy- I don't think PearlGirl drinks.

Scotty- What? I start'd drink'n when I was just a wee lad. I think I was 5!

Narrator- They all stare at him.

Sulu- (whispers) That must have been what caused the brain damage.

McCoy- And besides, think of how crazy she could get.

Kirk- (whistles) And if you consider how crazy she is now....

(dramatic pause)

Scotty- You don't get drunk off just a couple of drinks!

Kirk- Over ten is quite a bit.

Scotty- Nonsense! I drank my age just a few years back.

Narrator- They all stare at him again.

Scotty- Come on now, I'm not *that* old!

Spock- I believe that most human cultures have a birthday cake in celebration of the day they were born.

McCoy- How would you know? Don't you think it's illogical?

Spock- Yes, it is. I attended your birthday last year, doctor.

McCoy- Oh yeah! The one were Sulu gave me a paint bomb that was supposed to go off when I opened the present, and then it didn't! That was so funny! And when you were trying to examine it as to why it didn't work, it exploded in your face! I remember your face got full of paint! Ha ha!

Narrator- McCoy collapses laughing. Spock looks stern. Apparently he doesn't like being reminded of one of his more embarrassing moments.

Spock- Actually, Narrator, that is incorrect. Vulcans do not have embarrassing moments. I was not embarrassed.

McCoy- Yeah, right!

Kirk- Know what, Sulu? Make sure you don't get PearlGirl a paint bomb for her birthday, okay?

Sulu- But it was funny!

Kirk- That's an order, Mister Sulu!

Sulu- Fine.

Rand- Would anyone like some coffee *now*?

Kirk- I don't think so.

Rand- But it's my *special* coffee!

McCoy- Since when is replicated coffee special?

Rand- But I took all the trouble to bring it up here! That makes it pretty special!

Chekov- Russian coffee is better.

Rand- Is not!

Chekov- Is too!

Rand- Is not!

Chekov- Is too!

Rand- Is not!

Chekov- Have you even tried Russian coffee?

Rand- No, but mine's better!

Kirk- So we use the Mess Hall. We replicate food and a cake. We just need a game. Where's she from?

McCoy- Alania said they live in Michigan.

Kirk- Okay. What's a Michigan game?

(pause)

Uhura- In Africa we-

Kirk- We're not IN Africa, are we?

Uhura- But-

Kirk- But nothing!

McCoy- How 'bout..... PIÑATA!!

Sulu- Huh?

Kirk- Huh?

Uhura- Huh?

Spock- That word has no meaning to me.

Scotty- Huh?

Rand- Would anyone like coffee?

McCoy- No!

Narrator- Huh?

Chekov- Huh?

Snodgrass- Huh?

Kirk- What are you doing here, ensign?

Snodgrass- You never told me to leave!

Kirk- (groans)

McCoy- A piñata is that thing with candy in it that you hit with a stick!

Sulu- Oh!

Kirk- Oh!

Uhura- Oh!

Spock- I see.

Scotty- Oh!

Rand- Would anyone like coffee, *now*?

McCoy- No!

Narrator- Oh!

Chekov- Oh!

Snodgrass- Oh!

Kirk- That should work. Bones, you get the piñata and the stick. Everyone here has to meet me in two hours to set up the party.

Uhura- Do we *have* to?

Rand- How about some coffee?

McCoy- Has it ever *occurred* to you that nobody *wants* your coffee?!

Rand- (blinks) Who wouldn't want my coffee?

Kirk- See you in two hours! Dismissed!

(A/N- That's the end of that chapter. Be sure to review!)