Authors note: Hiya people! I'm sorry its taken me so long to update I've just had loads of homework and I've recently had an important exam.
In this chapter I've used a song by Vanessa Carlton called 'Paradise'. This chapter might seem a little…different compared to the rest of chapters but all will make sense in the next chapter.
Once upon a year gone byShe saw herself give in
Every time she closed her eyes
She saw what could have beenPeople, lots of them, all in there own life. All mixed up in their own problems, fears and happiness. She watched down on them most evenings, she just sat at her window watching people live their lives. It's easier to watch someone else live their life then it is to live your own.
She lifted up her hand to push her black hair behind her ear, then stood from her chair and turned to look at herself in the mirror. Surely enough her reflection stared back at her. In her eyes anyone could see she didn't have much hope left in her. Autumn Ivers, it wasn't her real name, she never wanted to use her real name again. It brought back too many bad memories. She looked at her reflection, her pitiful reflection. She knew time was running out for her.
Autumn lay in her bed tossing and turning; she hated the night, that's when once again the memories would haunt her. In her twenty years of living she never had thought life could be so bad. She was one of the first successful mutants made, and one of the first to escape from that prison she lived in. She had never known what it was like to have family and friends that cared for her. She thought back to just over a year ago when she was a little happier, her so-called 'boyfriend' used her for sex. He never cared about anyone, not even her.
Every night the nightmare begins. She found out she was pregnant; she was happy, but terrified at the same time. Beaten, bruised by her boyfriend when he found out. She knew he had been drinking when she had told him that day, perhaps…she knew it would be easier, and in the morning he more than likely wouldn't remember a thing. That night she decided to leave him.
Well nothing hurts and nothing bleeds
When covers tucked in tight
Funny when the bottom drops
How she forgets to fight…to fightNine months later of agony, no home, hardly any money or food, she gave in. When she was in labour she came to the police station and told them she was a mutant. Everyone was afraid. There were guns being fired and she was taken away somewhere. She couldn't remember where she went after that. The most painful memory was waking up in a room and seeing her baby for the first time. She didn't care who the people in the room were, she knew that they knew she was a mutant so she told them to kill her and let her baby live. They did the opposite. They murdered her baby in front of her and healed Autumn, letting her live this hell once more.
And it's one more day in paradise
One more day in paradiseAutumn awoke quickly in bed and started to cry. Every night the same dream, the same nightmare, the same reality. She couldn't take it anymore, she felt like she was going crazy or maybe she was already. Everyday was a never-ending cycle. In her cycle this would usually be the part where she was upset and would tell herself everything would be okay, but she knew she was just hiding from the truth. Everyday felt even worse than the last.
As darkness quickly steals the light
That shines within her eyes
She slowly swallows all her fear
And soothes her mind with lies
Well all she wants and all she needs
Are reasons to survive
A day in which the sun will take
Her artificial light…her lightShe grabbed her clothes and quickly got changed. Then she set out into the coolness of the night. She had to put an end to it. She wasn't sure where she was going; her empty mind led the way, until her legs came to a stop. She looked up and saw it was the hospital. Slowly, she began walking up the stone steps that led to the main entrance.
Inside the building were lots of people sat in chairs, almost all of them were injured. At the reception desk was a friendly looking middle-aged woman. Autumn saw the receptionist looking at her.
"Can I help you?" she asked Autumn.
"I want my baby." Autumn answered.
The receptionist looked at her strangely for a moment before speaking again. "You want to see your baby? If you go to the second floor, it's the first room on the left," she turned to her computer. "I don't think I've seen you before, can you tell me your name, please?" When the receptionist heard no reply she turned to where Autumn had been standing only to find that she was no longer there. The receptionist looked around for her but she was nowhere to be seen.
Autumn stepped out of the lift on to the second floor and walked down the corridor towards her destination. She stopped outside the room and looked through the glass to see the rows of babies. Slowly she opened the door and entered the room before quickly shutting the door behind her. She walked through the room and stopped at a baby girl. A small smile crept on Autumn's face as she watched over the baby.
"She's beautiful isn't she?" came a female voice from behind her. Autumn turned around quickly, startled by the person who was with her. She turned around to find that it was a nurse stood behind her. "Sorry there honey, didn't mean to scare you," the nurse said chuckling slightly.
Autumn stood still for a moment, not saying anything. "Get out." She finally said quietly.
The nurse looked at her confused. "What?"
"Get out," she said, more firmly this time.
"You can't tell me to get out, I work here."
Autumn could feel she was going to go out of control sometime soon. She really didn't want this nurse to get hurt. "Please, for your own safety…just leave," she pleaded.
"I have work to do here, I'm sorry but I really can't leave this room." The nurse turned around and walked to the other side of the room carrying on with her work. She felt a sharp pain in her back before falling limp to the floor.
Autumn watched over the nurse as blood poured from her back, from where she had been stabbed and stained the white floor. She looked at the switchblade in her hand, which was now covered in a layer of blood. Since just over a year ago she had brought one for her own protection. She never left the flat without it being close to her. It was supposed to only be for protection.
A tear drifted down Autumn's face but she quickly wiped it away. She heard a noise from behind her, and walked to where it was coming from to find the baby she had been looking at was crying.
One more day in paradise
One more day in paradiseShe looked over the crying baby girl. She noticed that when the baby was sleeping it looked so beautiful, now Autumn couldn't stand the whining baby. It still continued to cry.
"Shut up!" Autumn screamed at the top her lungs, but instead the baby continued to cry, now even louder than before. Autumn could feel herself crying too, but she didn't feel sad, she just felt angry. She just wished the baby would be quiet.
She gently pulled the covers over the baby's mouth and nose then pressed it down, stopping it from breathing. A few moments later the baby laid still. "Now you know how my daughter felt when she was just born," Autumn said as she realised that the baby was dead. Without remorse she walked from the room as she headed up the steps to the roof of the hospital.
It's one more day in paradise
One last chance to feel alright…alrightAutumn sat on the side of the roof with her legs dangling over the edge. She ran a hand through her short, black hair. It would be getting light in a few hours she thought as she looked down at her watch to see it was 3:30am. Time didn't have any relevance to her anymore.
The door opened that led on to the rooftop opened and a woman stepped out and walked closer to Autumn. She had seen a CCTV camera a few minutes ago and had wondered if anyone would come out to try to stop her. Surely enough someone had come out and now the woman was walking towards her and was knelt beside Autumn.
"It's a nice night, isn't it?" said the woman. Autumn turned to her and looked at her. The woman was smartly dressed with her greying-brown hair pulled back in a clip and a pair of glasses placed on the end of her nose.
"It's morning," Autumn simply replied.
The woman smiled slightly. "My name is Alison Beck," she said putting a hand out, in a friendly gesture.
"Autumn Ivers," she said shaking her hand.
"It's nice to meet you Autumn."
"So out of all the people they could send up here they decided to send a shrink." Autumn said looking into the dark sky.
"I wasn't sent up here, I decided to come up her by my own free will." Alison moved a little closer to Autumn. "How did you know I was a psychiatrist?"
"Just a guess."
How did she know? She'd been to too many psychiatrists in her life time. They all dressed basically the same and they all had a 'yes I give a damn about your life' look on their faces. Autumn wondered when Alison would start saying the usual things.
Don't pretend to hold it in just let it out
Don't pretend to hold it in just push it out
Don't you try to hold it in just let it out and
Don't you try to hold it in you hold it in"What brought you up here?" Alison said, trying to sound as friendly as possible.
"If I told you, you'd kill me," Autumn relied.
"Autumn, I'm not going to kill you. What makes you say that?"
She could feel tears starting to form in her eyes. "Because I did something really bad," she said as her voice started to break at the end.
"What did you do Autumn?"
A tear rolled down her face and she didn't answer Alison's question.
Alison decided that she would try again. "Autumn I'm the only one up here. Talk to me. What did you do?"
She'd kept everything in for too long, she felt like she had lived a lie. So now she was going to let it out, so she could finally die peacefully. Autumn could feel herself crying now, Alison slid closer putting an arm around her for comfort.
"I killed a baby," she whispered.
"Why did you do that Autumn?" Alison said, trying her hardest to keep calm.
Autumn pulled away quickly and stood up. "Stop calling me Autumn," she said. "It's not my real name."
Alison stood up next to her a little confused. "What's your real name?"
"Ellone Loire."
"Ellone, that's a beautiful name," Alison said trying to lighten the mood a little. "Why did you call yourself Autumn?"
Ellone took a step closer to the edge of the roof. "I started calling myself Autumn when they found out."
"Found out what?"
"That I was a mutant."
There was a long silence.
"When they found out, they killed my baby," Ellone said quietly.
"Oh my god, that must have been awful," Alison said, dropping her psychiatrist tone.
Ellone nodded her head. "Can you tell the parents of the baby I'm sorry and if the nurse is still alive can you apologise to her for me as well."
"What do you mean?"
"You'll find out soon, just promise me you will."
Alison paused for a moment. "I will, I promise."
"Thank you Alison, you're a good person," she said, smiling at her. "But…I must go now, my time is up." Ellone said, taking a step towards the edge of the rooftop.
"No!" Alison screamed.
"Please Alison, don't worry. When it's over I'll finally be happy with my baby girl…goodbye."
Ellone leaned forward until she was no longer on the rooftop. She could see the ground quickly approaching. She smiled. Soon it would be over, soon she would finally be happy.
Once upon a year gone by
She saw herself give in
Every time she closed her eyes
She saw what could have been…
Authors note: Ellone huh? Bet ya didn't see that one coming. Review please and tell me what you think of this chapter!
