Flashback to Now



Chapter 10



Ty had said to feel free to stay. But Liz didn't feel that comfortable doing that. So she quickly tidied up from where she had slept, or tried to sleep. She left a note on the table, thanking him for letting her stay. She remembered her promise to him, that she would try to hold it together for Sully in the coming days. He had been crabby to say the least, she remembered him saying. Snappy, yelling at anyone and everyone. She knew about the cabin, the horrible tremors he had been overcome with, the delirium, the nightmares, his running away. She climbed behind the wheel of her car and sighed. Those nightmares, his daydreams. She knew better. Those weren't affects of the alcohol. The same things had happened to her when she was younger. He was traumatized, he was depressed. They wouldn't go away with her here, he needed therapy. Yet suddenly, today, she didn't want to leave. She thought about what Ty had said to her, when he called her beautiful. Suddenly she had forgotten about Sully. She wasn't thinking unhappy thoughts. She was thinking of her walk. How sad it had been, but how beautiful. She shook her head. She couldn't think like that. She couldn't. He couldn't. Could they? She didn't know, and suddenly the though scared her.



Days later, and things moved slowly around the firehouse. It was weird, it was different. The plaque had been put up on the wall, the wall of all their fallen comrades. Their fallen heroes. The name glared at them. They didn't want to see it there. Her name didn't belong there. And yet there it was, plain as day. Plain as the day the world shook and fell out from under them. Now their lieutenant was in the burn unit over at Mercy, and the name was on the wall. Jimmy wandered over to the wall quietly. And looked. The name was written in black, against the gold it seemed to laugh at him. Laugh that his friend had been taken away too soon. He wanted to take it off. Take it off, throw it across the room, then out the window. And run over it with the engine a few times. Then a few more for good measure. But she would still be gone, and the name continued to stare back at him...the name...Alex Taylor.



Liz had avoided Ty for a few days. But when he called one day in tears, she responded. His friend had been killed in the line of duty the day before. He had been fine the day before, he had thought. But the shock wore off when he awoke, and he broke down. He cried like a baby, like he hadn't before. Not even when his father died had he cried so hard, and that just made him feel guilty. So he called her, and he was at her apartment. They sat on her couch. Ty had slumped down, his head resting on her shoulder. Her arms were lazily draped around his shoulders, her cheek leant against the top of his head. Here they sat as he quietly talked about Alex. The pain that came with losing her so fast. The mistakes he had made with her. And Liz listened. She reassured him that he had done no wrong. That he couldn't stop it, he couldn't save her. That she wasn't mad at him. Then he asked the question she didn't want to hear. "You believe in Heaven, right? She's there?" Liz sighed and stood up. "I don't know, I just don't know Ty." "Well, there has to be. I mean, I've always believed, I've always thought that's where my dad is. I don't know, this makes me think about it more," Ty said. "I don't know Ty," Liz said again. "You don't believe?" Ty asked. "Think of it this way, Ty. I was brought up in a world far from Heaven. So how could there be a God if he allows this?" Ty was silent.