Flashback to Now
Chapter 20
Sully knew it was coming, a long time ago. And here he was, in her hospital room, ready to take her home, but she had other ideas. "I'm going back, Sullivan, and there's nothing you can do about it," Liz said sullenly, grasping her wrist and wincing. She had not sustained horrible injuries, but enough to keep her in the hospital for three days. She was ready to go, she had had enough of New York. There was no turning back.
Liz walked around the apartment. She had somehow managed to pack in that one day, and was ready to go. She was glad she had never sold the old house, and her landlord said it was ready for her. It had been six long months, and she couldn't stop thinking about them. She had fallen in love, had suffered through Sully's drinking, his recovery, watched Pete improve then suffer and die, had gotten a job she loved but soon felt like it wasn't anything new or impressive, and had seen her father again, dead to the world she'd once lived. She couldn't take it anymore. She felt it in her blood, running through her veins, contracting in her muscles. Her legs wanted to carry her far, far away. She wanted to run. She was going to run.
The wind was blowing her hair back through the open window as she sped across the freeway. No train this time, too much time to think. She didn't want to think anymore. So she rented a U-Haul and hitched it to the back of her old Pontiac, leaving furniture behind and bringing only the belongings she could fit in cardboard boxes. Tears streamed down her face, but as she crossed the state line she felt herself begin to breathe easier again. She had run away again.
Sully sat in his apartment, staring at the chipped and near-crumbling ashtray, long faded pink from orange. The picture was next to him on the coffee table. It showed a beautiful little girl with sparkling green eyes on a swing, hair streaming behind her and her mouth open in an ecstatic scream of pure happiness as the world flew around her. Sully was standing behind the swing, ready to push her again when she came back down to earth and back towards him. Sully found himself thinking again, wondering what it was that kept bringing her to Pennsylvania. Guess I'll never know, he thought. Guess it's just a place to run and hide in.
Kim was riding along in the ambulance, head in her hand, looking out the window. She had heard the news that morning that Liz had left. She didn't know quite what to think, other than that she probably shouldn't be too surprised. Liz had basically stopped speaking to her, and Kim could see the darkness and gloominess that haunted Liz's eyes. In truth, Kim never really knew her that well. Sully had eventually filled her in on Liz's sad life story, and Kim now understood what had kept haunting Liz.
Ty was sitting alone in a coffee shop, absently stirring the cold liquid that had once been steaming hot. That was an hour ago, and he had not had a sip of coffee. He signaled for the check, threw a few bills on the table, and began to walk to his apartment. When he walked in, he stopped in front of the window that he had found Liz sitting in. He looked absently at the clock and saw that it was late, nearly two in the morning. He was too large to sit in the windowsill, so he pulled a chair as close to it as he could. Liz was right, the damp air did feel good against his skin. It felt like tears, he wondered if she had been crying.
Liz had finally reached home. She looked down a few houses to where her mother had once lived. It had been a while since she had seen her, she wondered where her mother was. Liz unlocked the door to the dark and empty house, then collapsed on the couch, still covered in the dusty slipcover. Liz's body was racked with sobs. She felt a sudden burst of deja vu. She had these thoughts once before, wondering if she had done the right thing. She knew that soon, it wouldn't matter anymore. She would go on as normal, as she had always done here. Here at home in Pennsylvania. She blamed Sully for uprooting her for so long. Something told her that he would be alright with her gone. And she could finally close that chapter on her life, and start anew. Without the flashbacks of her past. It was time for now.
