Due to a request from Mimiru I began this chapter sooner than I had planned. What can I say? She bribed me with a picture of Tsukasa and Mimiru holding hands.

This is based on an experience of mine if anyone is wondering. I can only write what I feel or have felt. So in this case Tsukasa and Mimiru's actions and reactions are courtesy of me and what I think He would do.

As always my love goes to my Caro Mio and is this story is also dedicated to S.C for friendship beyond bounds.

Akichi-kun: thank you for your ideas. Without you Tsukasa would not be as rich in character. And like S.C. my friendship with you is without bounds.

Samanda

Disclaimer: I do not own dot hack.

Quote of the day: 'Truth is always stranger than fiction.'

Longing Part Two

Morning had long been over and Tsukasa hadn't moved from the spot he had chosen.

So many changes in such a short period of time, Tsukasa mused. Life certainly went on even though you sometimes wanted to freeze time to stillness.

Sadness could be seen sometimes still in his eyes but more often it was gone and replaced with something he had felt seldom before the world. He was happy. His face could still be called expressionless but any person close to him knew that his when his lips turned up a little, it was a smile.

And he seemed to always be smiling around a certain spunky girl who was oblivious to his feelings.

But oh, when she was gone his smile disappeared and he was lost in a darkness that he had finally thought that he escaped. He was tormented by her image in his head at night and the sound of the wind mimicking her voice.

He tried to put it in the back of his mind to forget about it for a while but it kept intruding into his thoughts. Insomnia ruled his nights and Mimiru his days as he tried to figure out what to do. In the end it wasn't he who hit upon the solution.

It was his soul twin, Subaru.

Tsukasa had told Subaru the whole tale in his desperation. She held his hand comfortingly during the explanation and squeezed it gently when he was done.

Her blue eyes were thoughtful as they stared into his. "Tsukasa, it sounds like you have fallen in love with her."

Tsukasa nodded quietly and Subaru sighed.

"It's going to get worse," She warned. "Tell her you love her."

Tsukasa closed his eyes. Her advice resounded in his soul and told him that his twin was right.

Finally he nodded. "You are right, twin. I'll tell her."

"If you do it sooner than later it will be easier on you." Subaru offered a last piece of advice.

But he had ignored it and she had been right. He was suffering the torment of the damned and he wanted her to know, no matter what. Such a short time ago he had been glad he was unable to shed tears but now he sorrowed that it was denied to him. But he had no safe release to drain the swirling emotions within him except the power of words.

It mattered what Mimiru's reaction would be but it wasn't the most important thing. No, the most important thing was that his feelings would be out at the open and he would know relief.

So now he waited for Mimiru's arrival.

And finally she came with a torrent of repeated apologies that he waved off in unconcern. After all, she was here already and that was all that was important to him. Tsukasa's lips tilted upward in that slight grin from the force of the feelings that swept over him at the sight of her.

He forced himself to listen to what she said instead of gawking at her like some dazzled newbie.

"-So what do you want to do?" She was asking him. "We could go to a dungeon or try to level up at a beginning area for you."

He knew that if he picked either he would lose himself in the situation at hand and never tell her. That was a cowards way out and he could no longer be a coward.

"Can we just stay here for a while longer?" Tsukasa asked.

Mimiru looked at him with confusion. "But I thought you called me here so we could form a party."

Tsukasa shook his head and said softly, "I just wanted to talk to you. I feel so lonely."

Mimiru's face smoothed out and she smiled. "Let's walk around for a while, okay?"

Tsukasa nodded and they began walking aimlessly around 'The World'. From habit with walking with Subaru and the current deep chasm of his thoughts, he caught up Mimiru's hand in his own.

Mimiru flushed a little but chose to say nothing. When Tsukasa had noticed what he had done he dropped her hand like it was aflame.

"I- I am so sorry!" He stammered out, blushing.

Mimiru blushed a little more and said hesitantly, "I…I didn't mind."

Tsukasa's face was full of longing with a little bit of confusion mixed in. He stared at her in hope. "You don't?"

Mimiru shook her head and took his hand. "Nope."

Tsukasa blushed bright red but left his hand entwined in Mimiru's. Tsukasa actually felt happier than he had ever been before. He squeezed her hand gently and when she returned the gesture his little smile actually turned into a wide, sparkling smile.

He stopped suddenly and asked her. "Mimiru, do you have any feelings for me?"

Mimiru reddened again but nodded. "Hai."

"What do you feel for me?" Tsukasa said in a low voice. Fear had crept back into his voice as well as curiousity.

"You are my friend," Mimiru said simply.

Tsukasa was deflated. "A friend," He said in an empty voice.

An oblivious Mimiru frowned in puzzlement. "Tsukasa, what's wrong?"

Dealing with the sudden fall back to the ground was tough and he almost missed his opportunity to say what he needed to.

He cleared his throat and looked her straight in the eyes. "Mimiru, I have something to tell you but first promise me will stay friends no matter what."

Something flickered in Mimiru's eyes but it was gone too quickly for Tsukasa to identify the emotion. Tsukasa wondered about it but shrugged it off.

"I promise," She said quietly.

"It's so hard to start," Tsukasa began. "From the time I couldn't log out till until now there have been two main people that have helped me. Subaru and you."

"But Bear and the others-" Mimiru interrupted.

Tsukasa gave her his small smile. "They helped but you and she were more important to me than them."

Mimiru nodded and Tsukasa went on. "From the first time I saw you I was drawn to you. I thought it was simply because I was lonely but it wasn't. Through your patience, cheerfulness and help I grew to realize that I really did need other people for something. That I wasn't alone anymore."

Tsukasa took a deep breath and continued. "I was drawn to you and it only got stronger as time went on. And I finally understand why you were always in my thoughts and in my dreams at night."

Mimiru smiled at him. "That was really sweet, Tsukasa."

Tsukasa gathered up his courage and took the plunge. "I love you, Mimiru."

Mimiru froze and lowered the hand that had gone to smooth her hair. Tsukasa lowered his head and waited for the explosion of wrath as he writhed in tormented agony. But what came was unexpected.

A tan hand entered his vision and the fingers forced his chin up. He stared into Mimiru's brown eyes that held none of the disgust he knew he would see. Instead there was only compassion and something else he dared not name aloud.

"I thought it was Subaru," Mimiru said in a subdued voice that alarmed Tsukasa as she dropped her hand back to her side.

Tsukasa gave a tiny shake of his head. "No, Mimiru. Subaru is my soul twin, my sister in spirit. There are no romantic feelings between us."

Slowly Mimiru caught at his hand and held it between hers. She asked in a low tone full of suppressed tears. "Do you really mean it?"

Tsukasa nodded and Mimiru looked off into the distance. A few minutes later she gave him a small nod.

"I have to think about this," Mimiru told him. "There is a lot to consider, you know. It was different when I thought you were a boy. Because you are a girl if we get involved there will be serious consequences. I will probably be shunned by my extended family and we will be ostracized from most of society. Can you deal with that?"

Tsukasa nodded and Mimiru persisted. "Are you strong enough? I don't want to get my heart broken for nothing, you know."

"Yes," Tsukasa's heart soared and he said softly. "I can deal with anything, Mimiru. As long as I'm with you."

Mimiru nodded jerkily and threw her arms around him. "Then let's try, Tsukasa. Because I love you too!"

Tsukasa staggered but he caught Mimiru in his arms. The two stared at each other, all smiles as they basked in the feeling of each other's love. And as the sunset faded into twilight around them the two shared their first kiss.

And in the distance a wise man, a woman with divided loyalties and a justice seeker kept vigil over them. Near them yet apart stood an assassin who watched the scene with icy eyes while the wakened dreamer kept watch over the couple from the sky above.