Chapter 3



I, Watari Yutaka, am a fool. A martyr. A hopeless romantic. And an entirely hopeless case. I angrily thought as I pounded my clenched fists on the table to let out some frustration. 003 hooted indignantly and flew away from me.





I mumble a quick apology to my loyal pet. He has stuck by me in all this years and knew me so well, that he deserves an equal treatment with that of a human. I watch him fly through the window and disappear out of my sight. I sighed. All this Tsuzuki-bon saga has left me stressed out and distraught.





I wouldn't admit this to anyone but to 003 alone. Only he knows my about my affection towards bon. About how my affection towards him as a younger brother grew into admiration and possibly love.





Everyone in this office knows that bon considers me as a sane person to talk to. That is if I wanted to be one, and I'll always, always be sane for him. The way he puts my opinion and thoughts about some matters in high regards, made me feel all warm inside. And it makes me happy. So I always look forward to our little conversations, however warped they may be.





Every time we talk I notice something different from him. Or rather, I have realized something in him that I didn't before. Like how wonderful and expressive his emerald eyes were. I've learn to love the way they lit up occasionally with suppressed happiness, the way they darken in annoyance, the way they pulsate in anger. And I was content with that. Content about admiring him from afar. I didn't care and didn't give a damn that everything is in vain.





Even before I had fallen for him, I had found out that he too, likes Tsuzuki. This was owing to the fact that Hisoka almost always unconsciously opens up to me. I chuckled. Maybe I'm really easy to talk to, I thought to myself as I brought a hand to my chin, thinking deeply. Otherwise, bon wouldn't come to me and let some things slip.





This past few weeks, he's been ranting on and on about how Tsuzuki's been acting strange. About how he hates it when the amethyst eyed man is drunk. The truth is that, in my conclusion, he's simply worried about the welfare of Tsuzuki. And I can understand that all too well. Tsuzuki's my friend as well and I hate to see him fall in to pieces.





So I told bon to stay by Tsuzuki's side at all times. I told him that maybe his partner was in need of some attention. That he needs some company. Hisoka reluctantly agreed. After that, I smiled at him like I always do, saying that I'm proud of him since he's been listening to me. I ruffle his hair and made my exit.





That was the most generous thing I ever did, I think. I pushed bon towards Tsuzuki. Even if I broke my own heart, I did it. For Hisoka's sake at least. I remember that day very clearly. Tsuzuki was bouncing against the walls in happiness when Hisoka told him he'd go with him. He had hugged bon to himself looking genuinely pleased. Hisoka blushed prettily and tried to remove himself from the other shinigami's grasp. They looked like the perfect couple.





That's when I decided that maybe I am entitled to some happiness myself. That I can find love elsewhere. If those two knuckleheaded persons were able to find each other, then clearly a man of my intellect will be able to do so. I made a few experiments that proved to be all failures. Let me recount, all my shameful results.





Experiment number 1. Stay away from bon as much as possible.





At first I thought that this was a clearly logical idea. After all, how could I move on if I was still pining for him, right? So the first few days of this test, I avoided him. I holed myself in my lab and locked the door shut.





It worked quite well actually. I didn't see him and talk to him for about three days straight and so did everybody else. The fourth day, Kachou got really pissed and destroyed my lab door to cinders. Bon was behind Kachou, beside himself in annoyance.





My heart sped up at his sight and almost drooled. But then I felt Kachou's fist made contact with my head that I snapped out of my reverie. Bon just smirked and tailed out of my lab, leaving me at the very angry hands of Kachou.





Conclusion. The heart does grow fonder, in absence. How remarkably true in my case.





Result. Utter and total failure.





I am not one who gives up easily, so I decided that a few more experiments would suffice.





Experiment Number 2. Accept the fact that we'll never be.





Hmm. This experiment was, by far, the most difficult. What I did was to paste/attach all over my lab walls that Tsuzuki and bon were meant to be. Every where I turned there was a note saying: Watari Yutaka. Move on. Look at bon and Tsuzuki; they're perfect for each other. Take a hike.





Reading them over and over again made me lose concentration on my work. Hell! I didn't even made progress on my sex changing potion. Add the fact that I get all wired up by the thought about them being meant together. It almost made me nuts!





I was up the point where I was about to tear my hair off my head, from frustration. Thankfully, Tatsumi knocked and I was beyond panicked about the notes in my walls that I forgot to tear my hair out. Thanks to my inhuman speed, well I can have one if I'm in dire need and this one is up to case, I ripped them off my walls before Tatsumi could enter.





Conclusion. Never make notes where you could read them every where, every time. Especially if you really can't take what it says. It will definitely crack you up. Definitely.





Result. Need I say more? Another mother of failures.





Third try. Well I haven't really tried it out yet. Just an outline on what I'm supposed to do.





Experiment 3. Find happiness elsewhere. Flirt with co-workers until a find is seen.





Subjects: Tatsumi. Logical choice isn't it? Tatsumi is okay looking. No make that good looking. No make it, hmmmm.... Drop dead gorgeous? It isn't hard to fall for this guy, I guess, but he's pretty darn uptight. And he works everyone to hell! Imagine if we, let's suppose were together, then he'll have more authority to work me like mad! That's going to be pretty nasty.





Anyway, other choices are... Wait. I don't have any other choices. I can't possibly consider Kachou. It's out of the question. Never. Nu-uh. Terazuma? Nope. Might mistake me for a girl because of my blond locks, then he'll turn a monster on me. Shivers. Wakaba-chan? Not up to school girls types. Who else...?





So that lefts me with Tatsumi. Yosh. Its work but I'll get it done.





Conclusion. None yet.





Results. Good I hope.





Back on why I didn't get to start the experiment. Bon got a problem. A major problem. He came to me, almost on the verge of tears. He was as confused as ever. Story spilled from his mouth faster than I can comprehend. But I did get the main idea.





Tsuzuki, it seems, has invaded Hisoka's privacy. He kissed him and proclaimed his love for bon so passionately, it sent Hisoka reeling from the whirling emotions emanating from his partner. The young boy wasn't quite ready for it yet so he reacted to the hilt. Dropped the bomb on Tsuzuki that he hated him.





Tsuzuki reacted to this 'I hate you' statement and breaks the partnership. He acts all hurt and depressed. Knowing him, he's probably too ashamed to be working with bon any longer. So he decides that breaking the partnership would be the best thing for them both.





Hisoka on the other hand, reacted to this decision of Tsuzuki like the other man didn't mean the proclamation of love. Why, he asks me, did Tsuzuki do that? Won't he, you know? Like to have much time with me? That's what you do for your loved one right? Spend time with him and make him feel wanted? I was beside myself with sadness. Bon doesn't exactly know what love is. He hasn't and yet felt to be loved. If he only knew two of us already do.





Bon tried to suppress his hiccups and I patted his back to comfort him. I told him that Tsuzuki was just confused as well. That he was too ashamed to face bon. That it was his reason of breaking the partnership. Bon looked at me uncertainly. I smiled and gently explained to him, that indeed Tsuzuki loves him but he doesn't know how to express it well. To be exact, he doesn't know what approach he will use when it comes bon.





Hisoka's lips twitched and almost formed a smile.





"Is it because I'm a special case?" He asks me his eyes teasing. How I wanted to tell him right then and there, that indeed he is special. But instead I nodded and coaxed him to talk to Tsuzuki. He nodded and looked at me directly in the eye.





"Thanks Watari. I think I know how I feel know. But.. Tsuzuki has to give me more time."





"He will bon. He'll wait for you even if it takes forever." And he bounded out of my lab, very light in his steps.





I looked at the clock and noticed that it has been an hour since bon went away. I guess its time to look for Tatsumi now. I went out to look for the sapphire eyed secretary when I ran into someone.





"Bon!" I cried in surprise as I noticed Hisoka, crying.





"Wa-Watari-san..." I linked my arms around his shoulders and steered him in my lab.





"What happened bon?" I asked him gently as I set him down a chair and went about to fix him some tea.





"Tsuzuki- he, he..." He broke into a fresh batch of sobs, and I waited for him to calm down. I handed him his tea.





"What bon? How did your talk go?"





"I, we never did."





"I thought you were determined to talk to him?" I scrunched my forehead in confusion. He looked at me a mad gleam in his emerald eyes.





"How could I? He was having an intimate moment with Tatsumi!" He bellowed, but then hung his head in sadness.





"And I thought he really meant it when he said....." He paused for a while, bringing his delicate hands to touch his temple, then turned away very red in the face, because of anger.





"I was right to think he only wanted me for something else." I was at a loss for words. I wanted to defend Tsuzuki, but if he did do that to bon, I'll never forgive him.





"Bon? Are you sure about what you're saying? What did Tsuzuki and Tatsumi did? You know they're close friends." I managed to make some possible excuse, about that intimate moment Hisoka was talking about.





"Do friends kiss each other now?" Hisoka said, his eyes dulling and his fist clenched.





"No. It can't be." I whispered to myself. Apparently it was loud enough for bon to hear.





"It happened. We can't change the fact that Tsuzuki's a moron. Now give me the papers to our mission. I have to get a head start." Bon said with such authority and fierceness that I had to take a double. I realized that Tsuzuki has yet made another major damage to bon. He'll be even more jaded than before. And it's all Tsuzuki's fault.





My eyes flashed dangerously. I had to release this anger somehow. Without a word, I flung to Hisoka the mounds of paper he wants and went outside with fervor without another word.







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Outside En-macho, under those Sakura trees, sat Tatsumi and Tsuzuki. They laid a table there to discuss their next assignment. Tsuzuki pleaded like the inu-dog he was that he doesn't want to take a risk. Take a risk about seeing Hisoka again. Not now. Tatsumi relented so outside they were both, enjoying the sun and the tea.





"Tsuzuki-san! Are you listening?" The sapphire eyed man asked indignantly.





"What do you think Hisoka's doing now, Tatsumi? I'm not used to this. I always know what's happening to him. I feel so detached." Tsuzuki hung his head low and pouted.





"He's probably doing their task. Now the case..."





"Who's his new partner?" Tsuzuki asks, his forehead creasing up. Tatsumi sighed.





"Watari." Tatsumi sighed and set down his glasses. It seems to him Tsuzuki wont be able to work until he's satisfied that bon will be alright.





"Good. He'll be able to take care of Soka-chan." Tsuzuki said as he brought the cup to his lips which he promptly spilled. Tatsumi tutted and offered Tsuzuki his handkerchief.





"No. It'll get wet. I just have to go home and get a change of clothes." Tsuzuki said as he stood up, smiling the inu-dog smile.





"No. You will stay here until the briefing is over." Tatsumi said as he too stood up and cleaned Tsuzuki up.





"There. See you don't need a change of clothes." Tatsumi said as he turned to his chair to sit. His eyes widened when behind Tsuzuki, he noticed Watari looking enraged. He tapped Tsuzuki's shoulders.





"Watari!!! How's ..." Tsuzuki didn't finish his question. He stumbled back, a bruise in his cheek from the blow he received from Watari. Watari was shaking with anger from head to toe.





"I gave him to you." The blond haired shinigami hissed.





"What are you talking about, Watari?" Tsuzuki asks confused, as his bruise heals.





"I gave bon's heart to you! I made him see that he....." Tsuzuki's eyes widened. He didn't imagine Hisoka, running his hands on his face. He really had seen him!





"Well I was such a fool! Helping you all along." Watari continued as he composes his self.





"Watari, what are you talking about?! Just tell me." Tsuzuki pleaded. Watari just eyed him angrily then turned to Tatsumi, his amber eyes penetrating the secretary.





"Why don't you ask Tatsumi?" He said with a huff as he turned on his heels. Watari paused, and then looked at Tsuzuki his eyes boring into those amethyst depths.





"Don't let me see you going close to bon. I swear, a punch is not the only thing I can do." And with that he flounced off, his lab coat trailing behind him. Leaving Tsuzuki and Tatsumi behind gaping.





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A/N: Hey peeps! Thanks to all those who reviewed! Really appreciated them. Anyway, I'm sorry if Watari is ooc here. I can't help it.