"Hello, Richie," Karen said sweetly ushering him into her office the next Saturday.

"Hi," he answered throwing a glance over his shoulder at Tessa as she settled in the waiting room. Duncan had an unchangeable appointment and couldn't come with them.

"Tessa tells me you've been doing some thinking," she prodded gently as he curled up on the far end of her big leather couch.

"Yeah."

"Are you still mad at me?"

"No."

She smiled. "That's good. Do you want to tell me how it happened?"

"No."

"Okay, we'll start with something less sensitive. What did you do this week?"

"School," he shrugged.

"That's all? You didn't do anything cool?"

Richie thought for a minute. "I went to a basketball game," he offered. "Mac took me."

Karen saw her way in. "Was it fun?"

"Yeah."

"If was just you and Duncan?"

"Yeah, he took me driving and out to lunch before the game."

"So you're learning how to drive?"

"Yeah, Mac's teaching me."

"So you're starting to warm up to Duncan," Karen said.

"What do you mean?"

"You're not so uncomfortable around him. You understand that he loves you and isn't going to do anything to you, right?"

"I know that," Richie told her. "But I still feel weird around him. I'm okay with Tessa, though." He decided not to play games and just get it all off his chest. Everything he said was strictly confidential.

"Do you know why?" Karen asked.

"Mitch," Richie said. "I think it's because of Mitch."

"The babysitter?"

"Yeah."

"What does Mitch have to do with Duncan? Why do you think he is affecting your relationship?"

"I don't know. But every time Mac does something really cool, I think about Mitch. And it makes me kinda scared."

"Do you think maybe it's because Mitch was supposed to take care of you, like Duncan is doing, but instead he molested you?"

"Don't say that," Richie mumbled. Just because he had come to accept his past, didn't mean he liked hearing words like 'rape' and 'molest'.

"Okay, he took advantage of you because he was in a position of authority. And even though you know Duncan wouldn't ever do that, you still have that little voice in the back of your head warning you."

"Yeah, it's like that. Can you make it stop?"

"I can help you try to make it stop, but I can't just give you a pill to make it go away. That voice is going to be there for a long time and you have to learn to ignore it."

"How?"

"We'll get to that. Right now I want to keep talking about you and Duncan. Why did you run away?"

"Because he just kept punishing me and I was tired of it," Richie told her.

"So when did you decide that you'd had enough?"

"When he threatened to hit me."

"But you told me that he left so he wouldn't hit you. Weren't you happy that he wanted to protect you?"

"No," Richie answered. "I was scared."

"Scared that he wouldn't come back?"

"No, scared that he would. That was the first time he told me he loved me. I was scared what was going to happen when he came back, so I left."

"Were they mad at you when you came back?"

"No, they were relieved. They were really worried when I was gone."

"But you wanted them to be mad at you, didn't you?"

"Yeah. I wanted them to stop liking me so much. But it didn't matter what I did, even when I got in trouble they were still really nice to me."

"Is that why you stayed?" Karen asked. Richie was practically a textbook case. "Because they were so nice. You wanted to make them happy?"

"No, I gave up. It was pointless; I couldn't make them hate me. They wouldn't send me back like everyone else. Even when I told Mac I did something really bad, they stuck by me. I knew it was going to happen no matter what I did. So I gave up."

"You just gave up, accepted what you thought was going to happen? You didn't fight anymore?"

"No."

"Do you think that means you love them, too?"

Richie thought about it. "I don't know. What do you think?" He seemed genuinely confused by the suggestion.

"I think that's for you to decide. How would you describe Duncan and Tessa?"

"They're really nice and they like to help. Mac's a little strict sometimes, but Tessa hates to punish me. She always sneaks me something or lets me do stuff I'm not supposed to when Mac's gone. One time she just ungrounded me and took me to dinner. Mac tries really hard though. I think he just doesn't know how to be a dad. He can't decide if he's supposed to be mean or really nice so he kinda goes back and forth."

"What type of stuff do you do together?"

"All sorts of stuff. Tessa helps me with my homework and tires to get me into art and junk; she loves to go shopping for me. It's like I tell her I need a toothbrush and I get a whole new wardrobe. Mac's just into the whole bonding thing right now. He always tries to take me with him when he has to go somewhere. I think he's hurt 'cause I like Tessa more."

"You like Tessa more?" Karen asked. "How come?"

"I don't know. We're just more alike. She understands me more. Sometimes I think Mac doesn't know what it's like being a kid. It's a lot harder than when he was young. He expects me to act the same way his father expected him to act. But I'm not like Mac, at all. I try to make him happy, I just keep messing up."

"And how is Tessa different?"

Richie shifted on the couch. "She listens more. She always asks me these dumb questions, just to see what I'll say. She can keep all my friends straight. Mac has real trouble with that. She's like. it like she's."

"Take your time, think it out first."

"It's like she's more interested in what I do now, and he's more worried about what will and won't be able to do later. I'm not looking far into the future. I just want to pass the tenth grade."

"What else?" Karen asked, she could tell Richie was on a roll and didn't want to stop him.

"Sometimes Mac hovers too much. He's always scared I'm going to get myself killed or something. He's always telling me to be careful, not to attract too much attention, stay out of stuff that isn't my business. it's like he knows something he isn't tell me. And I want to know what it is. You know, he never told me why he let me move in with them and work for them. He just offered it to me. Of course, I took it. Who else would give me a chance? But he's always so secretive about everything. Some stuff I understand, because you can't go around letting the whole world know all your business, but sometimes I just wish he'd tell me. I told him all my secrets," Richie rambled haphazardly. It didn't matter what he told her, she couldn't tell anyone. "He knows everything about me. Stuff I was never going to tell anyone. Granted I never told him about. you know. but once I did I actually kinda felt better. And I really wasn't going to tell anyone about the records thing. but I told him."

"Records thing?"

Richie realized his slip. "My record. you know arrests and stuff," he quickly lied.

"Oh, that record. So you're honest with him, but he's not honest with you?"

"He tells me some stuff, just not everything. But, I mean, my big secrets are all kid stuff. to me a secret is who I have a crush on. his stuff's bigger than that."

"Adult secrets?" Karen asked.

"Yeah, really adult."

"I see." Karen made a few notes.

. . . . . .

After two more visits with Karen Richie seemed fine. He decided he didn't need to go anymore but was assured the option was always there. Three months after the lessons started Duncan proclaimed Richie ready for his driver's test.

Richie insisted Tessa take him because Duncan would just make him nervous. So Duncan waited to either congratulate Richie or assure him that he can take the test again next week. After all not everyone passes on the first try. Three hours after they left Richie came bounding up the stairs.

"So, how'd you do?" Duncan asked laughing.

With a wide grin Richie held up his temporary license. "Can I borrow the car this weekend?"

"We'll see," Duncan told him. "School starts again next week. It would be nice if you could survive your sophomore year. Only one semester to go until summer vacation."

"Never a straight answer," Richie grumbled.

"So has he told you his news?" Tessa asked entering the loft after Richie left her in his dust.

"What news?" Duncan asked. "You didn't tell me you had any news!" he scolded Richie with a grin.

"Shut up, Mac. I gotta call Aaron." Richie grabbed the cordless phone and ran into his room.

"I think he's excited," Duncan commented. "How did he do?"

"He was wonderful, the instructor didn't have a single complaint," Tessa told him. "You should have seen him. He was so nervous the whole way there he kept repeating rules to himself and telling me he couldn't do it. it was adorable. He was crushed when he got his midterm grades. Maybe he'll have a little more confidence in himself now." Richie had spent weeks studying for midterms, but just barely passed some of his classes. It had been a major blow to the boy's ego.

Richie came out of his room still grinning. "Aaron is so jealous, he's dad won't let him get his license until he's eighteen."

"You're not beating him by much you know," Duncan pointed out.

"So where do you want to go to celebrate?" Tessa asked.

"Spaghetti's?"

"Sure."

Richie grinned his 'I have a brilliant idea' grin. "Can I meet you guys there?"

"Yes," Tessa said as Duncan said, "No."

"Aw, come on, Mac! I'm a good driver you said so yourself."

"Fine, you can take my car. But there are some rules."

Richie sighed. "There're always rules with you."

Duncan held the keys up in front of Richie. "Always wear your seatbelt, don't mess with the radio unless you are completely stopped, if you get a ticket you're paying for it and you can't drive for a month-no exceptions, you damage my car or Tessa's it's coming out of your pocket, nobody else drives the cars but you, you can only have two other people in the car with you, you have to keep your grades up, curfew still stands.in bed by ten thirty school nights, eleven thirty weekends, not sneaking in the door, in bed, you break any of the rules, no car until we say otherwise, got it?"

Richie nodded. "Got it."

"Repeat it."

Richie sighed. "I screw up the cars or get a ticket, it's my money and no car for a month, two passengers only, no one else can drive, home and in bed my curfew, keep up my grades. I think that's all."

"Radio?"

"Only when I'm stopped."

"And if you break the rules?"

"No car."

"Until?"

"You say I can."

"Very good," Duncan looked at Tessa. "Anything to add?"

"Be careful," she said.

"And be careful," Richie repeated. "Can I go now?"

"You're hungry now?" Tessa asked.

"Well, I was hoping I go show Aaron," Richie admitted. "Can I?"

"I don't see why not."

"Just meet us at the restaurant in an hour," Duncan told him handing over his keys.

"Okay." Richie grabbed the keys and bolted for the door.

"Call us when you get to Aaron's house!" he called after him.

"You're never going to see your car again," Tessa warned Duncan as they heard Richie turn up the radio before pulling away.

. . . . . .

Richie showed up exactly on time to meet Duncan and Tessa.

"So, you're first time driving alone, how was it?" Tessa asked.

"Kinda weird," he admitted. "I had to yell at myself."

"You did something to get yelled at for?" Duncan asked.

"It was joke, Mac. Geeze, chill."

Duncan gave him a mockingly suspicious look. "If you say so," he said with a grin.

They made small talk until the food arrived. "Are you ready for school to start again?" Duncan asked as Richie cut into his ravioli.

"Kinda," he shrugged. "I mean I don't miss the classes and all the work, but it'll nice to see Natalie again. Her family went to Mexico for Christmas vacation."

"You like Natalie, don't you?" Tessa asked.

Richie grinned and blushed. "No."

"You're a horrible liar, Rich," Duncan told him. "You like her and you know it."

"But she has a crush on somebody else. So it doesn't matter."

"Who?" Tessa asked.

"She won't tell us, she's afraid we'll tell him during gym or something, I guess."

"Sounds to me like she has a crush on you."

"Me?"

"Why else wouldn't she tell you?"

"'Cause she doesn't trust me," Richie laughed. "Can I ask you guys a question?"

"Sure, Rich, what is it?" Duncan asked putting down his fork.

"Well Aaron started asking me all these questions and now I have some."

"What did he ask?"

"What kinda car I'm gonna get." Richie seemed embarrassed by where the conversation was going to go.

"That's up to you," Duncan told him. "Tessa and I've talked about it and have a deal for you."

"You guys aren't gonna. I mean, you don't have to. I'm not asking you to."

"The deal is," Tessa interrupted. "You can get whatever you want within reason."

"You guys are gonna."

"Match you dollar to dollar on the price of the car," she finished for him. "You have to pay for half."

"And all the insurance," Duncan added. "And even though you're paying for half, you can still get grounded from it."

"I can get whatever I want?" Richie asked.

"Within reason, so no Hummers or Ferraris."

"What about Yamahas?" Richie ventured. "Is that within reason?"

"You want a motorcycle?" Tessa asked.

"Uh-huh."

"A motorcycle," Duncan mulled over the idea.

"If you don't approve, I'll pay for the whole thing myself. I just really want one."

"You're sure? Cause once you buy it, you're not returning it."

"Yeah."

"Are you sure?" Duncan asked one last time.

"Uh-huh."

"Okay, then. If it's what you want, then you can get it. But you have to wear your helmet and a jacket. I don't care if it's 300 degrees outside. You have to wear them. And you have to pass the tests before you make any offers," Duncan told him. He and Tessa had already discussed that Richie might want a bike instead of a car.

"Really?" Richie asked excitedly.

"And when you get it depends on your grades this semester. You have to do some research and make sure what you get is what you want and it'll work for you. You're going to have to wait until you get all the money for the down payment so it probably won't get it until the end of the summer."

"Okay," he quickly agreed.