author's notes : Okay, sorry for not updating Lost Memory yet... I'm just in a really bad writer's block! But anyway, I kinda got this idea from Gundaw Wing/AC. I am completely taken by the series at the moment, and this was supposed to be written as a Heero/Relena fic, but then it hit me. Jet is kinda like Heero! Their almost exactly alike in attitude. So then... this! Hehehe! Anyway, enjoy! Sorry if its kinda angsty...
DISCLAIMER : Sadly, I do not own Gundam Wing nor Wild ARMs 3.
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Voice
by aya_yahiko/terrandagger
'He's at it again.'
The thought made her crumble. Why did he have to act this way?
"Jet..." She murmured his name, as approaching his bed. He was sweating all over. What was he dreaming about? "Jet..." She cooed again, trying to make him less restless. He was gripping the blankets so hardly that his knuckles were white. For awhile, she was sure that he wouldn't say anything, and that this night would end up like any other one : her sitting down on the floor, her head resting on the bed, her face etched with worry.
But then again... maybe tonight was different. He mumbled something, after all.
"I want to die..."
The words shocked her. "Jet?" This time her voice was more urgent, and she felt that her voice could hardly escape her mouth. 'He's just dreaming. He doesn't mean what he's saying.' She tried to soothe herself. But with the look on his face, it appeared that he wasn't kidding at all.
"Don't let me live..."
She couldn't take this anymore. "JET!" She screamed, shaking him by the shoulders. He was just kidding. His sub-consciousness was just letting him think and say things. "JET!"
At the sound of her voice, his eyes snapped open and met moist glistened emerald orbs.
"Jet!" She said happily, and her smile could not be hidden. By impulse, she hugged him to death. 'It was just a dream...' She thought, and she knew that once again she was just reassuring herself. 'Just a dream...'
The silver haired Drifter made no response to his comrades actions. His eyes just gazed on to the ceiling.
He sighed.
'She stopped me again.'
~~~~~~~~~~
"So... Where to, leader?" Gallows asked Virginia, who seemed to have a weary, tired look on her face. She yawned and stretched before replying.
"How 'bout Laxisland?" She said groggily, and her eyes were already half closed. The Baskar and the sniper looked at each other, then to Jet. Were they missing something here?
The amethyst eyed one glared and raised an eyebrow at them. "What!?" He said, his voice irritable. Immediately, his two other male comrades looked away, but they were sure something was up. Virginia usually wasn't this way. For one thing... she suggested to go to Laxisland... and that was on the other side of Filgaia...
"Virginia, are you alright?" Clive mused, as fixing his glasses, which fell occasionally because of the bumpy horse ride. "You seem unwell."
As usual, their leader shook her head and put on a forced smile. "Nah, I'm perfectly fine! Just... -yawn- a bit tired..."
With that as her reply, she suddenly kicked the horse and made it gallop, going far ahead from her teamates. Clive and Gallows looked at each other. Something's not right...
They both looked to the person behind them, knowing that he had something to do with their leaders strange behavior. After all, both of them were roomates every night. But to their surprise, the young adolescent was gone, already galloping to catch up with their only female comrade.
"Something's fishy." The Baskar priest plainly said, as he followed on, knowing that his scholar comrade would immediately follow. 'They're so silent today... not even a single fight...'
"Guess I better check out later..."
~~~~~~~~~~
Sulken.
That's what he was.
He sat there, on that barrel, his head down and his unruly silver hair covering his eyes. At the moment, the ground seemed very interesting.
...
He was almost sure about his dream yesterday.
He was almost sure that his life would be taken... that he would leave the world of the living for good.
But then... she called out to him. He remembered her honey brown hair falling down from her shoulders onto his, and how her emerald eyes seem to stare at him with tears.
What had he done to make her cry?
Did he murmur something to let her know what he was dreaming about...?
'I wanted to die.' He thought timidly, as he clasped his hands into fists. 'I still do.'
But what was holding him back?
"Jet!" The voice seemed like a melody in his ears. "Jet!" He raised his head slightly, just enough to acknowledge the caller that he had heard her. He then heard her monotone footsteps come closer, and the next thing he knew he was staring at something other than his boots.
"Its dinner time!" Virginia said, and she leaned down so that her eyes would come in contact with his. "C'mon, don't be sulky and cheer up! The moon's already up so we should shine ourselves!" Since when did she become a spokesman?
"Why do you always seem to stand out from people?" Jet replied in his usual Virginia-irritated voice. "You're hyper at night but sleepy at daylight. Are you sure you're not an owl?"
She glared at him before turning her back and stomping towards the inn. "At least owls have good vision! And a good sense of direction, too!" Okay, so obviously, she was offended. At least that cleared up his night stay outside. No one would bother him until bed time.
But then, he suddenly regretted making her leave. At least with her here, his thoughts wandered off from death. But now that he was all alone in the cold of the night, he doubted that NOT thinking about it would be possible.
'Would someone just end my life, please?!' Then that'd stop all the suffering. No more pain, no more having to endure the countless nightmares of the past. Everything would just come to a dark end.
He thought he would get what he wanted at Serpent's Coils, when he pushed Virginia out of the rock's way. But then he felt her pull him, and they both landed on the ground safely. How he despised her after that... but later on he found out how hard it was just to hate her. He thought he was using that saving act as an excuse to die... but then later, it came to him... maybe he really wanted to protect her after all...
...But it was just a 'maybe', right...?
Sigh.
But then... why is it that when her voice calls out to him, he would listen? Why is it that when her eyes pleaded for him, it always seems to be at the right time...?!
It would always be at the exact time when he would desperately want to die!
She knew, didn't she? All this time she knew...
She knew that he wanted to end his life a long time ago...
But then why was she stopping him? He had no reason to live...
No reason...
...At all...
~~~~~~~~~~
"Where to?"
Lombardia's voice echoed throughout her whole interior.
"Anywhere to suggest, Lombardia?" The only girl of the group stated, as she buckled up her air-flight safety gear. In other words... a parashoot.
"There seems to be a nice sales fair at Barrack Rise, Virginia." The dragon replied, and the young honey haired girl seemed thoughtful for a bit.
"Sales fair, huh? Sounds like fun!" The moment she said this, she was sure that a certain someone would have a violent reaction, but then, surprisingly, there came none. Virginia raised an eyebrow. 'Jet?'
She looked around, only to find him standing by a clear part of Lombardia's armor, a place where you could see the whole scenery below and just simply adore it. His eyes were melancholy and seeminly drowsy... as if he had done a lot of thinking during the night.
"Jet..." She sighed his name in sadness. She hoped he wasn't thinking of that again...
Why would he want to die so much anyway...? Had their friendship not proven to be an enough reason to live?
'Doesn't he care what we would think he left?' She thought, still staring at the young man in front of her. 'Doesn't he care about what would I feel if he died?!'
That thought made her stop in trail of thinking.
What would she feel if he died?
Would it affect her... that much...?
She sighed and recalled the day that he wrote a letter saying he would leave. She felt like her heart would stop beating at the moment.
'I guess it would affect me a lot,' She thought, as sighing and leaning on their ride's thick, metal wall. Truth be told, she didn't know what she felt for him... but she was contented to know that it was different from friendship...
Through all her thinking, she didn't seem to notice that her emerald stare was still focused on him, and that his amethyst gaze was also now directed to her. She blushed slightly, and immediately looked away.
Just as she did, though...
CRASH.
"What the--?!"
CRASH.
"Jet! Gallows!"
It took awhile for Virginia's mind to register what was happening. Through all the flying debris, she could see Clive standing near the broken window, his face painted with worry and surprise. She looked around, trying to find her two other comrades.
It was then it hit her.
Broken windows?!
She ran against the raging winds that now entered the dragon's cockpit. No... it couldn't be...
Jet and Gallows... they fell!?
~~~~~~~~~~
(This next scene is highly inspired by Gundam wing, episode 3 or 4 I think.)
Falling.
It seemed like an eternity.
How high up were they to begin with, anyway?
He positioned himself so when he hit the ground, it would be head first. Excellent. That would be instant. No pain.
From quite a distance he could see one of his comrades enjoying the experience of falling. There seemed to be no worry on his face. At first, the young amethyst orbed one thought if he wanted to die too... but then he remembered.
They were wearing parashoots.
He was wearing one too, much to his unluckiness. She had forced him to wear it.
"Yo punk! We have to open our shoots now!" He could hear Gallows talking to him. Ignoring his comrade, Jet closed his eyes and did not follow. He did not open his shoot.
This is what you've been waiting for...
He could hear the fast rustling of cloth from above him. Obviously, the tribesman had released his safety device.
"PUNK! If you plan to commit suicide, don't do it in front of me!" The brown haired man exclaimed angrily. "Open your shoot!!"
He did not comply.
Gallows shuddered. "Man, I'm gonna have nightmares about this!!!"
This is what you've wanted...
It felt peaceful, to tell the truth, to know that your life would end in a matter of seconds.
He was falling down... he could still hear Gallows' bellowing, and even Clive's shouting...
But none of them would change his mind. Not now... not ever.
He accepted death. Finally, it came freely to him! All would be over now...
Or maybe not.
"JEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEET!"
It was her voice.
His eyes snapped open.
Instictively, he pulled the string of his shoot, making the cloth go upwards... saving him from hitting the ground.
Above him, the Baskar tribesman shook his head... "Its too late..."
And he was right. Jet ended up hitting a side of a rocky cliff, and mainly because of gravity, he ended up rolling and rolling and rolling, bruises and scars from the rocks already forming in his skin. Soon, when rolled to the end of the mountain, he found himself laying on deep sand and his eyes were directed to a blue substance.
He was near the sea.
Growling, the amethyst eyed boy stood up. He looked at his body, wounds and blood were all over. He knew he could heal himself in a second if he wanted to, all thanks to the power of his Argetlahm. But at the moment... he wanted to feel the pain. "Dammit!" He hissed. "I shouldn't have opened my shoot."
Almost immediately, he saw Gallows landing a few feet away from him, and Lombardia too. In less than a second all his teamates were rushing towards him…
…But he only seemed to notice the soft and caring emerald green eyes that ran towards him, the owner taking him in an affectionate embrace as he willingly rested in her arms.
Did I really want to die?
He smiled a bit, before he lost consciousness completely.
"Maybe there are reasons to live... after all..."
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author's notes : Did you know that I was actually supposed to KILL Jet in this fic? There was supposed to be a last line that would imply that he died. But I can't do it, no matter how depressed I am... I love Jet too much! And I love you guys too much! Heheh! :D Anyway, please read and review! And don't worry, I'll be back with Lost Memory soon!! :D
