The Baka Ayho 7

By,

NekoRanma13 & Lain

A/N (NekoRanma13): Hey! It's NekoRanma13! Ok, this is a story my friend & I started in eighth grade, (& I just finished it), for the purpose of killing some peoples we hated at school… Mwhahahaha. ^.^' Anyways, this is written by the both of us. In the story my name is "Karmahome" (ahem… said like Tamahome… and don't ask please!) & my friend's name is "Lain". Well, Thanks for reading this fic! Please review!

A/N (Lain): I would like to thank the little people! J/k! It's like Karmahome said… we got mad at some people, so we decided to write a story & kill 'em off. I don't think they're ever gonna get to read it! (Karmahome: Hopefully, no da! ^_^')

            Drew and his friend Eric were off to the library to study for a big test. Drew loves to eat, so when he saw a vending machine, he got out his wallet and bought all the food, making Eric sweatdrop. All of the sudden, a big, fat flying dude caught his attention. Drew fallowed him and came to an ancient Chinese book. Meanwhile, Eric was looking for his friend, but couldn't find him. Knowing that there were some vending machines at the entrance, Eric went there. He then saw the big, fat flying dude, himself, and followed the dude up the stairs and found Drew. Drew was sitting eating three candy bars at the same time.

            "YOU BAKA! WE'RE NOT SUPPOSED TO BE UP HERE! YOU… YOU… YOU AYHO!!!" Eric screamed at Drew. Drew ignored him & read the book he found.

            "This is a strange book… it says it's Chinese, but it's all in English…" Drew mumbled.

            "What are you reading?" Eric said, glancing at the pages of the book.

            "'Universe of the Four Gods: The Adventures of the Baka Ayho 7'…" Drew said. Unfortunately, as soon as that was said, a bright purple light came out of the pages of the book. The two boys were then sucked into the book and into another world…

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            Eric woke up and looked at his surroundings. He was in a hot desert and Drew was lying unconscious, wearing a frilly, hot pink dress.

            "AHHH!!!" Eric screamed at what Drew was wearing.

            "Wha?" Drew said, waking up & looked down, "Ahhh! Why am I wearing a frilly, hot pink dress?!?!"

            Drew then started to run around screaming, until Eric trips him.

            "Thanks I needed that," Drew said from his position on the ground. Then some people came & commented on his dress.

            "Nice dress girly!"

            "Thanks. It's my color, isn't it?" Drew said stupidly. Eric facefaulted. Then outta nowhere the purple light appeared around Eric and he was sucked back to his own world.

            "Huh? Where'd he go? He was right here a second ago! Hey, that purple light must have killed him! Oh my god, what am I gonna do?! I'm stuck in the middle of nowhere, & I'm hungry! How can my life get much worse?!?!" Drew shouted, then it started raining; "I just had to ask, didn't I?"

            In the morning, when he reached a small town, he was wearing a smelly, brown and hot pink, frilly dress. So, Drew when looking for a place where he could try to get rid of the horrible smell. While he was searching, Drew came across a little boy named Joseph. Joseph also smelled bad, so Drew invited Joe along. A few minutes later, they came across an entrance to a forest, so they went in & found a stream. They jumped into the stream, forgetting that they still had their clothes on. They took their clothes off, but when they were done, a poison dart came flying past Drew's head, barely missing it.

"Damn it! I missed!" a voice behind a tree said. All of the sudden, a bunch of people appeared around Drew and Joe. Then a symbol appeared on Joe's forehead and he started to fight all of them at once. In the end, Joe ended up standing on a pile of the people with his hands in the air, but then fell off and landed next to Drew, who was sweatdropping. Then they go find something to eat.

            While they were searching for a restaurant, they found a strange looking person and asked if he wanted to go eat with them.

"Konnichi wa!" Drew and Joe said.

            "Konnichi wa," said the guy.

            "What's your name?" Drew asked.

            "Joel. What's yours?" Joel said.

            "I'm Drew. Ow!" Drew said

            "I'm Joseph," Joe said, pushing Drew, causing him to fall, "but you can call me Joe or Joey!"

            "Drew… why are you wearing a hot pink, frilly dress?" Joel said.

            "Oh, this? I dunno… I guess I don't have anymore guy clothes. Do ya have any I can barrow? I'll give 'em back! Honestly!" Drew said, and Joel gave him a pair of pants and a shirt, "Thank you!!!"

            "Hey man, ya wanna get somthin' to eat with us?" Joe asks Joel.

            "Sure why not," Joel replied. With that the three went off arms linked, skipping together through the forest.

            Later, they came to a group of people that live in the forest. They approached the people slowly and quietly.

(A/N: Please excuse our probably bad Japanese coming up. ~Karmahome)

"KONNICHI WA!!!" Drew said, a little too loudly.

            "Ogenki desu ka!!" Joel asked, loudly.

            "ANATA-TACHI FUTATSU HEN BAKA!" Joe shouted at them. Drew and Joel stared at him.

            "What the hell?! Why'd you say that?" they yelled at Joe. While this was happening, the people were gathering around them, looking really mad.

            "STOP!" said a voice from the crowd, making Drew, Joe, and Joel freeze.

            "Wh-who said that?" Joel asked nervously.

            "We are the 'Yuumei Mori Shonen'!" the voice said.

            "Right…" Joe said, "And we should care…why?"

            All of the sudden the crowd parted, to let a person show from the back of the crowd.

            "Ya know what?" said the person, looking up.

            "Chicken butt?!" Drew exclaimed stupidly.

            "Nai…what is this 'chicken butt' you speak of?" asked the person, "anyways…konnichi wa. I'm Crystal, or better known as 'Psycho Shiny Princess'! What are your names?"

(A/N: we'll be shortening "Psycho Shiny Princess" to Psp from now on.)

            "I'm Drew! I'm from outta this world!" Drew said.

            "Hey, yo, sup? I'm Joel," Joel said.

            "I thought that you people are 'Yuumei Mori Shonen'? But, you would be the "Yuumei Mori Wakai Josei'. What's up with that?" Joe asked.

            "This loud mouth is Joseph." Drew & Joel said.

            "I'm confused!" Joe whined.

            "Is he always like that?" Psp asked.

            "Yes, sad, but true…" Joel said.

            "So sad, he's kinda cute!" Psp said.

            "Hey, Psp, were's the next town from here?" Drew asked.

            "It's through the forest, turn right, then another right, then a quick right, then a left 15 feet," said Psp told them.

            "NANI?!" all three boys said.

            "Better yet, I'll take you there," Psp told them.

            "Ok!" Joe said.

            "Hey! Who are you?!" a girl's voice said. Drew, Joe, Joel, and Psp turned to find an auburn haired girl in a brown Japanese school uniform. With her, were five guys and a "girl"?

            "I am Psp," she said, glaring at the girl & waving her hand at the three boys, "and that's Drew, the Baka Ayho no Miko, and Joe and Joel. Who are you?"

            "Well, I'm Miaka Yuuki, Suzaku no Miko," Miaka said cheerfully, indicating to her group, "and that's Chiriko,"

            "Hi!" said the brown haired youngest boy.

            "Mitsukake & Tama-neko,"

            "Meow!" "Hello…" said a tall dark haired man with a cat.

            "Tasuki,"

            "HIYA!" said a fiery haired, fanged guy, with a fan, drinking a bottle of sake.

            "HE is Nuriko,"

            "Hi there!" said a purple haired crossdesser. (The "girl")

            "Hotohori,"

            "Hello," said a beautiful man with a sword.

            "And TAMAHOME!!!" Miaka said happily, hugging a bluish-green haired guy.

            "What kind of stupid names are those?" Joe said, "You look stupid, too. Especially you Nuriko, I mean, you're a gay crossdesser!"

            "Grrr…" Nuriko growled, his symbol glowing & his bracelets changing, "HOW DARE YOU!!!"

            With that, Nuriko leapt onto Joe and broke Joe's neck, which was easy, considering his strength combined with his anger.

            "Hey, what'cha kill him for?" Joel said, suddenly charging at Miaka.

            "Oh no you don't! No one gets away with trying to kill Miaka! YOU DIE NOW!!!" Tamahome yelled, shooting a life force at Joel and making him disintegrate.

            "Hey, you killed him! I'll kill you for that!" Psp said, rushing at Miaka.

            "No… you will die…" Tasuki said, waving his fan & burning Psp with the fire.

            "Ha ha ha!!!" Drew cackled, grabbing Miaka, "I will kill your Miko! Ha ha ha!"

            "I WON'T DIE!" screamed Miaka, stabbing Drew sloppily in the heart. Drew's grip on Miaka loosened and he collapsed on the ground, dead.

            "Hey, where has Chichiri been through all this?" Chiriko said, realizing that he wasn't there, "well, let's get on our way. Chichiri will show up eventually."

            The Suzaku group then wandered off, continuing the adventure they were on. In the tree branches above where fought, were three people. One was the blue haired, wandering monk, Chichiri. The other two, are none other than the authors, the blonde haired Karmahome, and the brown haired Lain.

            "Ha ha!" Karmahome laughed, almost slipping out of the tree, "Drew's so weak! He got killed by the ever-so-hungry, clumsy Miaka!"

            "HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!" Lain said, laughing uncontrollably, and fell off the branch, only to be caught by Karmahome & pulled back onto the branch.

            "Calm down, Lain-chan…" Karmahome said, and then turned to Chichiri, "so, what do you think, Chichiri-sama?"

            "Well I'm glad you two are happy, ya know!" Chichiri said, looking down the path Miaka & his fellow warriors disappeared, "I'm also glad Miaka didn't get hurt, ya know. Well, better get back to the others before Tasuki does something stupid in his drunken state, ya know. Sayonara, no da!"

            "BYE!" Lain said, then going back to laughing at Drew's death.

            "Ja ne! Thanks for the help!" Karmahome said as Chichiri disappeared in a puff of smoke, "we'd better get home now, Lain."

            Lain ignored her, and continued her laughing. Karmahome rolled her eyes & grabbed Lain's arm. Then, she snapped her fingers & the two authors disappeared in a puff of smoke like Chichiri…

            "Not without a souvenir!" Lain exclaimed, clinging onto Kouji.

            "Lain…" Karmahome said, sweatdropping, but happy petting & hugging her puppy Koji* "how many times have I told you not to drag him from his world?!"

~~ The End ~~

D/C: NEITHER I NOR LAIN OWN FUSHIGI YUUGI OR RANMA ½… SO NO SUEING! K?

*[A/N: Lain has Kouji from FY… I've got my black, Australian Shepherd puppy whose name happens to be Koji]

A/N: Please review. And here are translations for the Japanese words we used (incase ya don't know):

Baka: idiot/ stupid

Ayho: moron

Konnichi wa: hello/ good afternoon

Ogenki desu ka: how are you

Nai: no

Nani: what

Ja ne: see ya (loosely translated)

Anata-tachi futatsu hen baka: You two clumsy, idiots

Yuumei mori shonen: Famous forest boys

Yuumei mori wakai josei: Famous forest young women