A/N: Okay kiddies, we've reached the finale leg. This is the last chapter. There will be an epilogue uploaded soon, a little 3rd Person view into the lives of Carter and Abby over the years after this chapter ends. A little attempt to "wrap it all up in a big bow" as Dr. Dave once said…::wooks:: Anyway, I'll do more in-depth notes and thank yous after the epilogue. For now, here's Chapter 8 - the finale *true* installment of this story. I had a moment in my mind when I started this, as to where it would end. And we're at that moment. I never intended this to be a long chapter fic, so I've stayed within my original boundaries. Right. Enough rambling…Please R/R, as you all have been so wonderful about doing. It means so much, really. And makes me write faster…Heh.

'Spank juu to Kate and Kess for beta-ing this one. I wuff juu! And Julie, too, since she beta'd the first half of it when I was unsure whether or not to run with this idea…

Oh!! OH! And one more thing: For mood music, listen to Janet Jackson's "Everytime" whilst you read this. It pretty much encapsulates where I have Abby's mindset in this chapter…Listen to it, or read the lyrics…you'll understand…oh, screw it, I'll put the lyrics at the end of the chapter. Because I wuff 'tis song so very much…

Anyway, this chapter takes place about an two hours after the last one left off. Enjoy! I hope it's all you were expecting out of a final chapter…

Abby's POV (because I wuff her so very much, I suck her psyche dry…)

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Three and half years.

That's how long it took us to get to this moment in our lives.

Three and a half years.

That's 1,277.5 days.

It's 1,839,600 minutes.

After all that time, it still feels like only yesterday that we shared coffee on the roof and joked about keeping warm.

So much time together. Never enough time together.

I always want more time with him. Need more time.

And now, we'll have that. After three and a half years, we've reached that pivotal moment that I often thought would never come.

No longer best friends. No longer boyfriend and girlfriend. We finally got there.

He's my fiancé, now.

I've been wearing this ring on my finger for over a week now, but it was always just a reminder of him - a link to what I was sure I had lost - until a few hours ago.

There's something different about it, now. Knowing that this ring represents our engagement - our official engagement - brings some kind of new and indefinable sparkle to this diamond.

My heart still skips a beat when I look at it, but for a different reason now.

Not because seeing it causes me to remember that he's gone, as it did before.

Only because seeing it makes my entire being swell with love.

With incontrollable joy.

I've been watching him sleep for over an hour now. I can't stop looking at him.

He's really here. He's really safe. He's really mine.

After I accepted his proposal, he made love to me as if he had never done so before.

Gently.

Slowly.

Making sure to imprint every moment onto his soul.

He whispered that he loved me, and although I know he does, I've never believed it as much as I did in that moment.

Feeling his arms around me, his lips upon my neck. It's a feeling that I had convinced myself I would never experience again.

And it was the most incredible encounter of my life. Just being with him again. Holding him. Loving him. Knowing that he was feeling the same about me.

I had pulled his face toward my own and whispered to him that I wanted him. Needed him. Forever.

He stared into my eyes and a smile began to form on his lips, before he descended toward my ear and I heard the most beautiful words in the world: "Abby…my wife."

The only response that I was capable of was a deeply emotional sigh. The thought of those words being true someday was overwhelming. I've never wanted something so desperately.

I had kissed him deeply, passionately, before continuing to show him all of the love that I possess for him.

And it's a love that I'm sure, now, will never leave me.

No matter what happens between John and I, my heart will never love another this deeply.

After more than an hour of watching him sleep peacefully, I'm overcome with the need to touch him. To reassure myself, once again, that he isn't simply a hallucination.

My fingers gently reach out and find his forehead, barely touching but making sure to feel the warmth of his skin. Moving to his hair, I run my fingers through it softly and revel in the beauty of the man that I will soon call my husband.

My husband.

I never thought I would get married again.

In a million years, I never saw myself as someone that would give herself completely to another once more. Richard had done quite a number on me - I had convinced myself that being unmarried was a much better lifestyle for me.

That was before I met John, however.

I roll over on my back, taking my gaze away from him for the first time in hours. Letting the thoughts of my past run through my mind, I close my eyes and think about how much things have changed over the years.

Since the moment when I first met Carter.

When I first realized that there was a connection between us, I was afraid to let myself like him. Even as a friend.

Afraid to form any kind of emotional attachment.

It was easy with Luka - comfort, security…no risk of getting hurt. No emotions involved.

But I couldn't help myself, and soon I was in a state of friendship with Carter. Best friends. Despite my every effort, I really liked him. He was a good guy - a great friend. The only person I could be comfortable bearing my soul to.

He saw right through me, into the depths of who I am and who I truly want to be.

Before I knew it, my best friend had stolen my heart. Even in the midst of a relationship with someone else, I couldn't stop thinking of Carter. Thinking of the possibilities - of the 'what if's and 'what might be's.

Things ended with Luka and I was somewhat relieved. I was free to lose myself in the fantasy of me and John as more than just friends. I had finally admitted to myself that I liked him. I really, truly liked him. So much.

But even after allowing myself to like him, I was afraid to take the next step.

Afraid to kiss him.

Afraid of losing all that we had built together.

He was my best friend. I couldn't risk destroying that.

Sitting on the loading dock of the Lava Lounge one night, however, I realized that it was a risk worth taking. I had taken his face into my hands and stared into his eyes - begging, pleading with him to kiss me.

And in that moment, I knew that if he ever did press his lips to mine, I would never be afraid to reciprocate.

It wasn't long before that dream became a reality. His lips caressing mine, sending shocks of electricity throughout every fiber in my being.

Finally.

Why I was ever afraid, I'll never understand. Something so perfect and magical could never ruin the bond that we had created in the years previous.

Months passed and we settled into a relationship unlike anything that I had ever experienced. And his kisses were always with me. Always reminding me that I had made the right decision.

But then…another hurtle.

I had overcome my fear of kissing him, but now I was afraid to let myself love him.

Love.

It's not something that I give into easily. It's the biggest obstacle in my life. Every person I have ever let myself love has left me in shambles. Too many tears. Too much pain.

And I didn't want that with Carter.

We were happy together, just being in a relationship. Why bring love into the picture and risk destroying everything? Why couldn't we just be together and exist as one? Did love really need to make an appearance?

I was determined to keep it out of my life. I'll be damned if I was going to fall in love with him and watch myself end up with pieces of my broken heart all over the floor again. Love only causes pain. Never any good.

The way he looked into my eyes, though…I could see into the recesses of his deepest desires, and I knew that he would never hurt me.

He loved me. I could see it in his eyes. I could feel it in the way he held me.

This was different than before. He was different.

And no matter what I tried, I found myself falling in love with him.

Admitting to myself that I had never loved someone so much.

And, finally, admitting it to him. Only to hear him say in response that he felt the same.

No more fear. Only love. And, God, I have never felt so complete. So utterly and ridiculously happy. He loved me. He still does. And I love him, too. I always will.

The only fear that still looms over my head is that now that I love him, what if I lose him? What if he leaves? What happens if I wake up and realize that he's no longer there?

The answer lies in the past few weeks. I did lose him. As far as I was concerned, he was gone. Never to return. And I realized that even his 'death' couldn't change my world. My heart still beat with love for him. My head still replayed images of our time together. It was proven to me that I'm a better person because of the time that I've spent with him - a stronger person, overall. With or without him, I can make it through life and be the woman that he always told me I could be.

He's not really gone, though. He's here. Lying beside me, his arm gently splayed across my stomach. And I can't help but think that my fear of losing him is also unjustified. He's not going anywhere. He's going to marry me and keep me safe in his arms forever.

With every new-found fear, I took a leap of faith and risked it all. For him. For a chance with him.

And I couldn't be happier with the outcome of it all.

As I lie here and contemplate whether my name sounds better as 'Abby Carter' or 'Abigail Carter' - what? A girl has to prepare, right? - I feel his hand travel up my torso and begin to caress my neck. His lips press against my temple and I smile widely, eyes still shut in a state of wonder.

"You think too much," he whispers softly against my neck.

I laugh lightly and open my eyes, rolling onto my side so that our faces are now mere inches apart.

"Hi" I smile as I say it, looking deeply into his eyes.

"Hey yourself," he responds, moving his hand to push a strand of hair behind my ear.

I love it when he does that. God, I love it.

I let out a deep sigh and bite my lip before breaking the silence that has settled between us.

"I still can't believe it…"

"What? That I'm here, or that you agreed to marry me?"

I close my eyes and smile. "Both."

"Well, believe it. It's for real. Finally."

"Took you long enough to ask," I state sarcastically, raising my eyebrows and giving him a smirk.

"Me, huh? Well, I think it's debatable as to who caused the real delay…"

This earns him a smack on the chest, but he grabs my hand and pulls me closer, capturing my lips with his own.

This is heaven. This is where to be, forever.

And it looks like I'm getting my wish.

Forever. With him.

"Ya know," he whispers, and I notice a change in his expression. His face is serious now, distant. "That plane that crashed? I knew one of the guys. Josh. I'd only met him once, and we only talked for about five minutes at the airport, but still…He didn't deserve that."

"No one does…" I murmur as I reach to touch his face. I can't even begin to imagine the things that he saw while he was there.

"When they brought him to our outpost…I saw him, and all I could think about was his wife. He had told me they were only married for a year, just celebrated their anniversary. And I couldn't - God, I couldn't stop thinking how unfair the whole situation was. And I couldn't stop thinking about…"

He sighs deeply, stares directly into my eyes.

"…about you."

"John…"

"I needed to talk to you, to hear your voice. To know that you were okay and to reassure myself that nothing would ever come between us. But the phone lines were down and then we just got so busy and I just…God, Abby, I'm so sorry I never called. I can't tell you how sorry I am that you went through that - that you sat here for days, thinking I was dead and…"

Closing his eyes, he shakes his head gently and I know that he still feels unimaginable guilt over the suffering the I endured. But that's the thing - I endured it. And he's okay. I don't want him feeling this way.

"It's okay, babe. We're both okay, and you're home. We're together, and I did okay while you were gone. Sure, it sucked. It hurt like hell, thinking you would never lie here beside me again…but it was just a misunderstanding, and you can't keep beating yourself up about, okay? I'm fine, I promise. You're here, now. I'm perfect."

I smile and punctuate my words with a quick peck against his lips, but I can see that he still has thoughts left unsaid.

"I know," he nods and smiles back warmly, seemingly giving thought to his next words. "I just - it's taken us so long to get to this moment, ya know?"

"I know. Too long."

"That's just it…I don't want to feel like we've wasted a single moment together. I don't want to end up like Josh and his wife - so close to having it all, and then it's gone in an instant. I don't want us to get so caught up in the petty things that we forget how lucky we are just to be together, ya know? I couldn't handle it if I lost you and felt like there was still so much unsaid - so much left for us to do."

I can't help the tears that are forming in my eyes, but I'm determined not to let them fall. Sometimes I still can't believe how wonderful this man is, though.

"Carter. That'll never be us, okay? I love you. It took us way too long to admit that, but it's true. I love you, and I know you love me."

A sneaky smile begins to form on his lips and I see his eyes light up, changing into the mischievous little boy that I love to banter with.

"You know that, do you? I don't know where you ever got that idea…"

Shaking my head, I laugh gently and roll on top of him, pressing my lips to his and requesting entrance with my tongue. He obliges immediately, and we're quickly caught up in the passion that I'm assured will never fizzle out. Not for us. There's too much love here. Too much hope.

Pulling back, I leave one more kiss upon his forehead and move myself off of the bed. I wrap his blue flannel robe around myself, melting in his scent as it envelops me.

"I'm gonna go make some coffee. I'll be right back."

His only reply is a satiated and remarkably happy grin, and I can feel his eyes watching me as I exit the bedroom and head toward the kitchen counter. Searching the cabinets, I realize that I'm out of coffee. Apparently, awaiting his return has upped my need for caffeine in replacement of the alcohol and cigarettes that I tossed out of my life.

"Hey Carter?" I call from my corner of the kitchen, still searching the cabinets. "Honey, we're out of coffee. You want some tea instead?"

No answer. Maybe he's in the bathroom.

I fiddle with the tea bags and grab the kettle, filling it with water and placing it on the stove. It's at this moment that I feel his arms surround my waist and he places his chin upon my shoulder.

"Hi" he mumbles into my neck, kissing me softly.

"Mmm…" I moan in approval. "Hi."

His lips are next to my ear, now, and I can feel his warm breath against my skin. Then, a curious and gentle whisper.

"Did you just call me 'honey'?"

My head whips around to look at him in wonder. "What?"

And I think back over the previous moments.

"Uh - yeah, I guess I did…"

I raise my eyebrows at him and shrug slightly, unsure of my reaction. I'm not one for pet names.

"How very…domestic of you…" he responds, a seductive and sultry lilt in his voice.

This brings a huge grin to my face and I raise my left hand into the air for both of us to inspect. Staring at the beautiful engagement ring on my finger, I decide on my reply.

"Well, ya know - it's never too early to get started on that, right?"

I hear him release a playful laugh before he reaches out and takes my hand into his, playing with the ring upon my finger. "Start on what? Your domesticity? You, me, that picket fence, a couple of kids and a dog? You mean that domesticity?"

He's nuzzling my neck again and I stop to contemplate my reaction. There was a time, not so long ago, when the idea of a domestic life in the suburbs with a husband and a bunch of kids running around calling me 'Mommy' would have scared the hell out of me. Too many risks. Too many possible problems. Too many chances for pain and heartbreak. But standing here, feeling his lips upon my skin and watching him caress the diamond upon my finger, I realize that there's nothing I want more.

I sigh deeply and turn my face again, gaining his attention and gazing into his eyes.

"Yeah. That's exactly what I mean."

The smile that spreads across his face is remarkable. I love this man. I always will. And I'm willing to take another risk with him - the risk of sharing my life completely. The risk of marriage and family. It's like my mother once told me: That's all there is, is risk. You just have to take a chance and leap into love. Otherwise, you're going to miss out on all the great things.

And I want the great things. With John. It's a risk worth taking.

He takes a step back, still holding my hand, and pulls me with him. Reaching in front of me, he turns off the stove and leans in to kiss me gently on the lips.

"Come on," he whispers, a light in his eyes.

I take a step forward and follow him back to the bedroom.

Every step I take from this moment forward is a step toward our future. A step toward the dream that I was once too afraid to believe in.

But I believe it now. And I know that this is real. This is true.

This is forever.

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I'm afraid I'm starting to feel

What I said I would not do.

But the last time really hurt me.

I'm scared to fall in love.

Afraid to love so fast.

'Cause every time I fall in love,

It seems to never last

But every time your love is near,

And every time I'm filled with fear,

'Cause every time I see your face,

My heart does begin to race every time.

One half wants me to go,

The other half wants me to stay.

And I just get so all confused.

I'm scared to fall in love.

Afraid to love so fast.

'Cause every time I fall in love,

It seems to never last

Every time your love is near,

And every time I'm filled with fear,

Cause every time I see your face…

Could it be that this will be

The one that lasts?

The fear does start to erase every time.

Could it be that this will be

The one that lasts for all my time?

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