The Trouble with Eavesdropping
Part 6

A/N- So does this mean I'm going to non-denominational hell?

Story still not done guys, but I think you'll like this chapter. And we really are almost there.
Really, truly, surely. We're talking just one more normal-length chapter...

Not that anyone honestly believes me anymore...

BUT before you get too upset, let me just say that this is the chapter I've been
taunting you with for a few weeks now. This is the chapter I had the most fun
writing. And this is the chapter I was told that I had better post as soon as possible
if I know what's good for me.

Without further ado...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

~~~~~~~~~~
DANIEL'S POV
~~~~~~~~~~

They're here.

Ok, I can do this. I mean how hard can it be? I've faced down System Lords for
crying out loud! Merde. I'm starting to channel Jack. I shake my head and focus on
the problem at hand.

All I need to do is keep an eye on Kira and make sure she doesn't drink anything
given to her by one of the guys. While maintaining a low profile so that neither Kira
nor her friends recognize me.

Right.

Ever try to keep an eye on someone in a really crowded bar? I listen very carefully
as Jack describes Red and Curly once again. I think it's ludicrous that he assigned
them aliases when we actually know what their names are.

"Red is wearing black jeans and something red underneath a dark leather jacket. He
just put out a cigarette and.. Shit! Daniel, he's tapping the top of his jacket pocket
and grinning at Curly. He's definitely brought something he's not supposed too."

Damn. I was really hoping that one of them would come to their senses and not try
something like this.

I make eye contact with John, the bartender, and nod my head in the general
direction of the front door. Both of us watch as two young men walk inside. John
raises his eyebrows in question and I nod affirmatively. Yeah, these are indeed the
guys. Indeed! Now, I am sounding like Teal'c.

I really should try and make some friends outside of SG-1.

I stand up and slowly start making my way closer to Kira. I've pull the baseball cap
down low so that anyone giving me a casual glance won't really recognize me. The
odds are pretty good that Kira is drunk and since she isn't expecting me, I won't
really register with her. But Stefan is a different story.

I had watched the flamboyant Barista come in an hour or so ago and judging from
the way he was looking around the room, I have a funny feeling he's on the lookout
for me.

Wonderful.

I watch 'Red' and 'Curly' as they go to the bar and order a couple of drinks. Just two
I note. They meander over to a far corner and watch Kira and her friends from afar.

Kind of like me.

"Hi." A voice says beside me. Grudgingly I take my eyes off the pair in the corner
and glance at the voice on my right. I nearly drop my ginger ale (in a tumbler glass)
at her feet. I honestly didn't know that women could dress this way in a public
place.

"Uh, hi." I say in return. The woman smiles and it's slightly predatory. She *so*
knows how she must affect men. And being a man myself, I'm afraid I am not
immune. To quote something Jack told me not too long time ago, 'You might be
married Daniel, but you sure as hell aren't dead.' I smile self-depreciatively, well,
not today anyhow. I can't believe I'm joking about the number of times I've died or
been presumed dead.

It is a very twisted universe we live in.

"You here with anyone?" The woman asks. Idly I wonder how her dress stays in
place. I mean *obviously* her breasts play a role in that, but you'd think moving
about would be a bit problematic. Red is definitely her color though.

"Say yes Daniel." I hear Jack whisper in a sing-song voice into my ear. I know I'm
turning an embarrassing shade of crimson at the moment. It's one thing to be hit
upon; it's something completely different to have it happen in front of witnesses.

"Yes." I say glancing back at the two young men to make sure they're still in the
same place. I watch as they hold up a hand and beckon for a waitress. Damn.
They're ordering more drinks.

"Oh!" The woman says clearly surprised. "I'm sorry! I usually don't make these
kinds of mistakes."

I suddenly hear Jack's baritone laughter bellowing through me earpiece.

"Sir!" Sam admonishes. She might be telling Jack to stop, but I can tell by the tone
of her voice that she's smiling as well.

"Sorry, sorry." Jack says quickly getting himself back under control. "Daniel, tell the
nice lady that it's all right, this type of thing happens to you all the time."

"Colonel!" Sam says disapprovingly. "Daniel," she says in a softer voice. "The
woman believes you're Gay."

"I'm what?!" I sputter aloud nearly dumping my drink.

"It's ok honey." The woman in red says to me as rests a hand on my chest. "You
experiment all you want with the other team, just come on back when you're ready
for a real woman."

I know my mouth is agape as she gives me one final pat on the chest and sashays
off towards the bar.

"Told you, we shouldn't put him in jeans that tight Carter." I hear Jack say.
Thankfully, Sam stays completely silent. I try to put this whole embarrassing
moment out of my mind as I turn back towards 'Red' and 'Curly'.

Uh oh. I look frantically around the room.

"Jack!" I say loudly not caring if anyone stops and stares. "Get the hell in here!"

~~~~~~~~
JACK'S POV
~~~~~~~~

"What?!" I yell back. Daniel sounds spooked and that isn't a sound I particularly
enjoy hearing.

"They've split up!" He pants sounding like he's about to hyperventilate. What the
hell is he doing? I wish we'd sprung for some video cameras as well....

"Who's split up?" I counter looking at Carter for help. Kira? Red and Curly? The
Harlem Globetrotters? I need something more to go on Daniel!

"The Bobbsy Twins Jack!" Daniel yells, "Who the hell do you think?!" Red has taken
off towards the bar and the other guy is approaching Kira."

"I got Red, Daniel. You just keep the punks away from Kira." I hastily rip the
headset off of my head and give Carter a firm look.

"You stay put!" I order.

"Yes Dad." Sam says rolling her eyes. Rolling her eyes?! Isn't that subordination?

"Carter..." I growl as I open the van door. We rented a van. How more cliché can
we get?

I hate clichés.

"Sorry Sir." Carter says blushing slightly. Well at least I think she was blushing.
Hard to tell under all that color on her face. "You'll need this Sir," she says throwing
me a spare earpiece awkwardly with her left hand.

"Thanks."

"Try not to kill anyone, ok?" Carter calls out as I close the door behind me. I think
she's kidding, but I idly contemplate the idea.

Nahhh- the paperwork alone would be a bitch.

"Daniel, I'm on my way!"

~~~~~~~~~~~
DANIEL'S POV
~~~~~~~~~~

'Not good, not good. not good.' I think to myself as I hastily make my way through
the crowd towards Kira and her group. The bar wasn't nearly as packed an hour
ago- where the hell did all the people come from?!

"Sorry."

"Pardon me."

"Hey!" I can't believe someone just pinched my ass!

Out of the corner of my eye, I catch sight of Jack coming in through the front door.
We instantly make eye contact and I nod my head to the left to indicate the direction
of Red. Jack nods and signals me to stay put and... hold my fire? No wait, that's a
different signal. Stay put and keep low? Damn! I have GOT to learn those hand
signals better!

Curly has blended back into the crowd and unless I want to make a total ass out of
myself, I should concentrate on Kira and not worry too much about him. As long as
she doesn't drink anything given to her by one of the guys she should be ok.
Instantly I tell myself that ANYONE can spike a drink, hand it to another person and
then hand it to Kira. But I can't control everything here. What I can control is..

Merde! harah zarba beeshor...*

Someone has just given Kira a drink. And off to the left I see Curly smiling slyly as
he turns and heads off towards the restrooms. Let Jack deal with him as well, I have
got to stop Kira from drinking that drink! I whip off the baseball cap and stuff it
awkwardly into my back pocket. (stupid tight jeans!) I hastily run a hand through
my hair and hope to god I don't have bad breath.

I know what I need to do.

I'm only slightly breathless as I pull up short behind Kira. Her back is turned away
from me and she is holding what is most likely a drugged beverage in her right hand.
She's laughing at something and lifting up her drink in order to take a sip...

~~~~~~~~~
KIRA'S POV
~~~~~~~~~

Daniel Jackson is kissing me.

Holy mother of God, Daniel Jackson is kissing me. I know I'm drunk, but I plead to
whatever gods may be out there to not let me be so drunk that this memory is lost
come morning. I feel like a character out of a bad romance novel as Daniel dips me
low giving me the sweetest, gentlest kiss I've ever had. Not really certain if I had
settled on a birthday wish prior to this moment, but from now on I will *so* wish for
a Daniel Jackson kiss on every birthday. There's nothing 'R' rated about this kiss
(darnit!), but that doesn't stop my toes from curling and for other more hidden areas
of my anatomy to suddenly become all warm and tingly.

My latest drink tumbles carelessly out of my hand and I vaguely register the sound
of broken glass as I lose the ability to do anything except absorb Daniel Jackson and
his kiss. I know it couldn't have lasted more than a few seconds, but I swear several
hours passed before he pulled his lips from mine.

"Happy Birthday Kira." Daniel whispers again smiling against my ear as he
effortlessly lifts me back up into a vertical position. I take a shuddering breath in
and am assaulted by the scent of Daniel's aftershave. Naturally, he smells good as
well.

In the background I hear Stefan and some other friends from work making some
rather colorful comments. Back off boys, he's all mine! Well, for the moment
anyhow.

I stare into Daniel's amazingly blue eyes and try to remember to breathe. I always
knew he had gorgeous eyes, but never before had I seen him without those large
glasses of his. Thankfully, Daniel still has an arm draped loosely around my waist,
I'm pretty certain I'd be flat on my ass without it.

Daniel's face is quickly morphing into one of concern, as I stand there completely
speechless. This man has rendered me utterly speechless. Come on Kira! Say
something! I look into those pretty blue eyes of his and open my mouth.

"D..Daniel?" I stutter aloud.

Oh yeah. I'm in complete control here.

"Happy birthday." He says again giving me a small smile as he steadies me once
more before removing his hands. Damn. I really liked them where they were.

"Thanks." I say thankfully stutter-free. I take a moment to really look at Daniel.
It's a wonder I hadn't noticed him earlier. He's dressed in a rather tight black t-shirt
and these wonderfully worn Levis and although I knew Daniel was a guy who kept
himself in shape, I honestly hadn't realized he was *that* in shape. Whoa.

Suddenly I find myself extremely thirsty. I lick my lips.

"Sorry, you spilled your drink." Daniel says apologetically. It's odd, but I get the
feeling he really isn't sorry at all about that.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Well?? Am I forgiven for not ending it quite yet? What did you think of the little
scene between Daniel and Kira? And just to assuage your fears, or squelch them
depending on what camp you're in, Daniel and Kira will NOT have ANY romantic
relationship. EVER. The luscious Jackson (good band by the way) did what he
needed to do in a very challenging situation and Ms. Kira will just have to sort it out
for herself.

To be continued...

** Daniel's swear languages: French, Hebrew, Arabic, and Persian.
And no, I'm not going to tell you what they mean. Go to insult-dot-net and see for
yourself!