Chapter 5 - 'Barbie Girl' - Gwen's* Story
September 23, 1999 - San Fernando Valley, California
"So this is where you live...." my friend TJ Hanson said as we walked up the pebbled driveway to my Norfolk Road house.
I nodded. "Would you mind holding my books for a second while I get my keys out of my bag?" I asked, holding out the books,
"No problem, Stefani!" he grinned, using his pet name for me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that I hated No Doubt. "Why don't you get yourself a bigger bag?" he asked. "Can you actually fit anything in the one you have now?"
"I can fit in my purse, mirror and makeup, and that's all I need really," I said, unlocking the door and gesturing for TJ to come in.
"Yeah, you know, you don't need books or anything at school," TJ replied sarcastically.
"Exactly," I said, flashing my most flirtatious smile. We walked into the kitchen. "You can sit here," I said taking my books. "I'll just go up to my room to drop off my stuff."
I ran out of the kitchen, up the stairs and into my bedroom. I threw my books and bag onto the bed and looked at myself in my full length mirror. I twirled around so that I could check myself out from all angles. I was wearing a light pink (designer!) top and a tight, bright pink 'Valley Girl' skirt. I looked stunning, especially against the backdrop of posters that covered my walls. Matt Damon, Leo DiCaprio, the Backstreet Boys, JTT, Tweedle-Tay Manson - I looked great next to all of them, and they looked even better than usual standing with me. Speaking of which, my new friend TJ was drop dead gorgeous. He was just sooooo perfect. With his long blonde hair and blue eyes he looked exactly like Tweedle-Tay Manson, only taller! Actually, I had a sneaking suspicion that he was Tweedle-Tay, and he wanted to come back into normal society after his terrible disappearance two years ago. Poor Tay! TJ and Tay shared the same birthday too, which added real substance to my suspicions. I tied my platinum blonde hair into pigtails with pink ribbons. I looked totally cute - perhaps the cutest I'd EVER looked! I grabbed my math textbook and ran back down the stairs and into the kitchen.
TJ was sitting at the table, tapping and looking bored. Wasn't that something Tweedle-Tay Manson did? Oh well, TJ looked absolutely gorgeous. He was wearing tight jeans, a black shirt and a red jacket (probably designer!). But then again, he could afford it, he lived in Beverly Hills. That was why we had to walk to my place instead of using his car. TJ's sister needed it for the half hour drive home. My parents would drive TJ home when they got back from work. TJ was also wearing three necklaces, one with a cross, one with a soccer ball and the other with a star in a ring. "Would you like something to eat?" I said, batting my eyelashes.
"Sure," he said, smiling.
"What would you like?" I asked.
"Anything you have is fine."
"Well, you're in for a treat!" I said excitedly. I wasn't much of a cook, but I had a feeling, just by looking at TJ, of what kinds of foods he'd like. I got a packet of brownies and packet of red jellybeans from the kitchen cupboard and took a root beer from the fridge. "I hope you don't mind, but I don't have a lot of time to cook you a meal for afternoon tea...."
"Oh don't worry - this is great! I love this sort of stuff," TJ began to eat enthusiastically.
I got up, poured myself a glass of water and sat back down at the table, watching TJ eat. He looked so cute! He looked at me curiously. "Gwen, why aren't you eating?"
"Um, I don't eat...." I said softly.
"Why not?" he asked, confused.
"Oh, I don't want to get fat," I explained.
TJ rolled his eyes. "That is so dumb Gwen. You are so skinny, you should eat more.... how much do you weigh anyway?"
I was so embarrassed. There was no way TJ would go for me if he knew how fat I was. "Ah.... ninety lbs...."
"Is that all? See, I knew you were thin. Michaela is only two inches taller than you but I'll bet she weighs about thirty lbs more than you, and she's not fat. She's only a four or six or something...." Tweedle- Tay said.
I shook my head. "You're just being nice. I've seen your sister, she probably weighs like 70lbs or something...."
"Well maybe when she was nine," TJ grinned. "Eat a jelly bean, it's not going to kill you." He shoved one into my mouth. My god! TJ touched my mouth. That was practically kissing (if he'd used his mouth rather than his fingers). I smiled sweetly.
"Thanks Tay....."
TJ looked at me in shock. "What did you just call me?"
I looked down at the table, trying to hide my blushing face. "Um..... I called you Tay. Sorry, you see, I used to have a thing for Manson and you just looked so much like him and I went off into a little fantasy....."
"Well," TJ said. "I'm not Tay so don't get too carried away in your little fantasies. We wouldn't want you to just come out and kiss me or something, would we?"
"Of course not," I said hastily. "Well, we'd better start studying now, let's go to the loungeroom."
We got up and walked into the loungeroom. TJ sat down on the couch and I walked over to the CD player and took a CD from the rack. "I work better with music," I explained.
"I hope so, because the Math test is on next Tuesday and I don't want to fail," TJ said as I joined him on the couch. The CD began to play.
'Have you ever stood outside a picket fence, you see through but you can't get to the inside - Oh you sit there and wait, I look at you and anticipate what we could be and what we could do....'
TJ groaned. "Why are you so interested in Manson, they haven't recorded anything for years. They are total has-beens."
I looked at TJ carefully, ready to interpret his reaction. "Oh, I don't think so. In fact, if Tweedle-Tay Manson turned up on my doorstep today and asked me out I would say yes."
TJ snorted. "You must be desperate........ Anyway I think we should be talking more about Math and less about Manson. Can you do absolute values?"
"Noooo," I whined. "They are so hard, and so confusing and so useless."
TJ nodded in agreement. "They sure are useless, but I think we're going to find them very useful in the test on Tuesday. I was talking to Michaela the other night and she explained to me how to do them and they're actually really easy. All you have to do is take a number and if it's positive, it's positive and if it's negative, it's positive. Just take the number and make it positive, no matter what."
"Yeah, I get that but I get really confused when it's like, equations over 'x' equaling other equations and the 'x' equation is an absolute value and you have to figure out what 'x' is...." I explained.
And so TJ and I continued our fascinating discussion of Math for the next hour and a half. By that time, my Manson CD was on its second rotation and it was up to my favourite song, 'I Will Come On You'.
"Wow TJ! I actually get this," I said excitedly. "You're really good at math. Why aren't you in the advanced class with Michaela?"
"Oh," he said. "I only know what I know because she explained it to me."
"Don't be so modest!" I protested. "You're probably going to top our class and they'll send you to advanced."
"I don't think so. I'm not actually very good at math. I'm more of an English person myself. I only know a lot 'cause I've done a lot in the past couple of years. Michaela and I really didn't have a lot else to do," TJ explained.
"Really? Why not?" I asked, moving closer to TJ.
"We just spent most of our time together, without anyone else at all. We were basically teaching ourselves from home....."
"Oh poor you! I guess you've never had a girlfriend," I continued.
"Not exactly," he replied carefully.
It was time, I decided. I had my opportunity to lean in and begin ecstasy. I fluttered my eyelashes and moved in.
'I will come on you.....Oh I will come on you.'
I heard a key turning in the door and my parents' voices. "Gwen honey are you home?"
I quickly moved back across the couch. Luckily TJ had not noticed my attempt to kiss him. My mother and father walked into the loungeroom. "Hi Gwen, who's your friend?" my mother asked.
"This is TJ," I said nervously.
"Good afternoon Mr. and Mrs. Mendelson," TJ said politely, standing up and extending his hand. They shook hands.
"So you're Gwen's 'friend' that we've been hearing so much about?" my father said, inquisitively.
"Oh we're just friends," TJ said, smiling. "I've been helping Gwen with absolute values."
"Well that's nice of you," my mother said.
"Ah, Mom, would you give TJ a lift home?" I asked.
"Sure," she replied. "TJ, would you like to stay for dinner? We're having Mexican."
"That would be great, Mrs. Mendelson. I'd better call my sister first though, OK?" TJ said.
He was such a dream!