Chapter 2
~*~ Relena's point of view ~*~
They think I'm over him.
Fools.
I love him just as much, if not even more, that when he was alive.
I still remember waking up that day. There was someone in my room, seated beside my bed, and, for just a moment, I thought it was him. That was, of course, until I noticed the long mane of platinum-blond hair.
They had called Milliardo, too afraid to face me themselves.
In quiet tones, he told me that there had been an accident during a mission, and that Heero was involved.
I think he was just as afraid as the others were.
By then, I was frantic. In my mind I was already planning about rescue missions and media cover-ups. I was so nervous that I began to pace and babble, as I wringed my hands.
My brother told me later that he ended up screaming and shaking me until I got back to my senses.
And that's when he told me the horrible truth: that my love was gone, and he was not coming back.
My heart. My world. My dreams and hopes. It all shattered before my eyes. A heads-on collision with reality scattered the pieces of my very soul, and the one person that could pull them back together was.
I didn't want to think about it. I simply couldn't face life without him.
The funeral went in a blur, as did the weeks, and then the months.
Death.
Silence.
That was all I felt for a long time. That, and anger. And much to my regret, I directed that anger towards Duo. He was just as broken as I was, but pain made me blind and deaf, cold. I needed to discharge my anger against someone, and I chose the one person that I could damage the most. The one that was suffering as much, if not more, than I was.
May God and Heero forgive me, because I hurt someone that didn't deserve it, someone that was as much of a victim as I was.
And now there is no way of taking it back.
~*~ Milliardo's point of view~*~
I should have been nicer to the little bastard. If I had, perhaps I would be feeling better. Guilt is a horrible feeling, I tell you, and the worst part is that it just keeps eating at you, keeping you awake in the middle of the night with this whole troop of "if only's" at its service. It is a really nasty little bugger.
Hearing Relena pace all night long doesn't help either.
It turns out it wasn't only a bad case of teenage lust, or a crush, for that matter. She really did love him. Why or how, your guess is as good as mine. I simply cant understand my sister. Or women, now that we are at it. They are the world's most mind-wrecking creatures (until three years ago, Heero Yuy held that title) and there is simply no way to figure out what they are thinking, and whenever you try to guess. Well, lets just leave it at it being a very bad idea (particularly if your guess has anything to do with Une, there is just no freaking way to guess which personality is in control!!!!).
I'm getting side-tracked, am I not? Where was I. Oh, yes. Guilt. It has been making my life miserable for three years, and I still don't know what to do about it. The tiny little bastard finally got his wish and got blown to hell, and here I am, at uhh. 2:30 in the freaking morning!!, pondering what could have happened if I had only been nicer to the guy.
Ok, so I must admit that I felt bad about him dying and all (although I did consider making a party and celebrating, perhaps that's where my guilt is coming from!), and I do regret that the others suffered about it, but come on!!!!!! I want to god fucking damnit have a good hour's worth of sleep!!! Is that too much to ask! ?! ?
RRRRRIIIINNNNGGGG
Apparently so.
~*~ Relena's point of view ~*~
They think I'm over him.
Fools.
I love him just as much, if not even more, that when he was alive.
I still remember waking up that day. There was someone in my room, seated beside my bed, and, for just a moment, I thought it was him. That was, of course, until I noticed the long mane of platinum-blond hair.
They had called Milliardo, too afraid to face me themselves.
In quiet tones, he told me that there had been an accident during a mission, and that Heero was involved.
I think he was just as afraid as the others were.
By then, I was frantic. In my mind I was already planning about rescue missions and media cover-ups. I was so nervous that I began to pace and babble, as I wringed my hands.
My brother told me later that he ended up screaming and shaking me until I got back to my senses.
And that's when he told me the horrible truth: that my love was gone, and he was not coming back.
My heart. My world. My dreams and hopes. It all shattered before my eyes. A heads-on collision with reality scattered the pieces of my very soul, and the one person that could pull them back together was.
I didn't want to think about it. I simply couldn't face life without him.
The funeral went in a blur, as did the weeks, and then the months.
Death.
Silence.
That was all I felt for a long time. That, and anger. And much to my regret, I directed that anger towards Duo. He was just as broken as I was, but pain made me blind and deaf, cold. I needed to discharge my anger against someone, and I chose the one person that I could damage the most. The one that was suffering as much, if not more, than I was.
May God and Heero forgive me, because I hurt someone that didn't deserve it, someone that was as much of a victim as I was.
And now there is no way of taking it back.
~*~ Milliardo's point of view~*~
I should have been nicer to the little bastard. If I had, perhaps I would be feeling better. Guilt is a horrible feeling, I tell you, and the worst part is that it just keeps eating at you, keeping you awake in the middle of the night with this whole troop of "if only's" at its service. It is a really nasty little bugger.
Hearing Relena pace all night long doesn't help either.
It turns out it wasn't only a bad case of teenage lust, or a crush, for that matter. She really did love him. Why or how, your guess is as good as mine. I simply cant understand my sister. Or women, now that we are at it. They are the world's most mind-wrecking creatures (until three years ago, Heero Yuy held that title) and there is simply no way to figure out what they are thinking, and whenever you try to guess. Well, lets just leave it at it being a very bad idea (particularly if your guess has anything to do with Une, there is just no freaking way to guess which personality is in control!!!!).
I'm getting side-tracked, am I not? Where was I. Oh, yes. Guilt. It has been making my life miserable for three years, and I still don't know what to do about it. The tiny little bastard finally got his wish and got blown to hell, and here I am, at uhh. 2:30 in the freaking morning!!, pondering what could have happened if I had only been nicer to the guy.
Ok, so I must admit that I felt bad about him dying and all (although I did consider making a party and celebrating, perhaps that's where my guilt is coming from!), and I do regret that the others suffered about it, but come on!!!!!! I want to god fucking damnit have a good hour's worth of sleep!!! Is that too much to ask! ?! ?
RRRRRIIIINNNNGGGG
Apparently so.
