I Can Still Remember You



Warnings: shounen-ai, violence, angst, AU

Pairings: 1+2

Disclaimer: Don't own GW, don't own Blackmore's Night or their song…:-P can't sue me

^_^

//Blah// = lyrics



Duo pulled the leather laces up on his tall boots tightly so that there would be no danger of

them slipping. Next, his thick leather jerkin slipped on over his loose white shirt. He

fastened his sword belt around his waist. He effortlessly went through all these motions

without even thinking. His usually animated face was grim and sober. He fought back the

tears, knowing they were of no use.

He took his long hair in his hands and swiftly braided it to the tip. He paused as he

reached for a black ribbon to tie it with. Staring at the strands as he held them in his

hands, he contemplated. He had never really understood why he had always kept his hair

so long…it had just always been that way. He had never really looked at it before…not

before Heero. Heero had said he liked his hair.

Duo's misty violet eyes went distant as soft memories prickled in his mind………strong but

oh so gentle fingers eased away the purple ribbon that bound his hair in its twined braid so

that the long chestnut tresses were released. Heero wanted to run his fingers through

them…

//I thought of you the other day,//

Duo scowled, but found he was only angry with himself. He tied the black ribbon in place

of the purple one from his memory and tossed the braid over his shoulder.

"Stop feeling so sorry for yourself," Duo scolded himself. "He's the king…you knew he was

bound to be betrothed."

//How worlds have changed, led us astray,//

//Colours seem to fade to grey,//

//In the wake of yesterday,//

Duo straightened his leather armour and fastened his cloak, both feeling heavier than they

had ever done before.

Relena Peacecraft………

How he hated the name………

He strode out into the courtyard of the castle, trying desperately to suppress the memories

of what he had lost. He had fallen deeply in love with Heero Yuy, the king. Duo Maxwell,

simple guardsmen, had fallen in love with his king. He didn't know how, he didn't know

why. Not even now did he understand as he strode across the muddy courtyard under the

grey sky, pacing towards the large castle gates.

He knew that if he listened he could hear the stamping horses, the talking men and

chatting townsfolk that had all gathered to watch solemnly as the rest of the army was

sent off into battle. But he did not listen for what he knew he could hear. No matter how

he tried not to dwell on that which hurt him, he could not help it.

Heero's eyes had been so deep and mysterious when the rest of him had been so solid and

unyielding…

//You looked into my eyes,//

//You had me hypnotised and//

//I can still remember you………//

Duo was so certain he had touched something in his king. Heero would not have degraded

himself to sleeping with a guardsman unless he had truly felt something for him………would

he? Heero had smiled when they had been together, he had talked, he had

been………gentle. Had it been just and act?

Duo swiped at his eyes with the backs of his gloved hands.

No, Heero could not have felt anything………why else would he have gone and married the

Peacecraft heir?

But it was hard not feel the pain of betrayal, even though Duo knew he had no right to

interfere in his king's relationships. He shut his eyes for just a moment as he leant on the

heavy oaken gate of the castle, just allowing himself a small flickering of the times they

had spent together.

//I had a dream of you and I,//

//A thousand stars lit up the sky,//

They were standing on the king's balcony that looked out over the castle grounds. The

night was young, cloaking the forbidden lovers in her secretive, black embrace. The stars

had sent out a thousand points of light that extended into Duo's soul. His king and his

lover wrapped his arms around his waist from behind, pulling him into his embrace, softly

planting kisses along the length of the guardsman's long neck.

Duo had smiled, feeling that for the first time in his life things were going right. He

remembered reaching up with one hand to feel the soft, short hair of his king whilst

entwining the fingers of the other with Heero's.

//I touched your hand,//

Duo, childishly, had not sung praises at the celebrations on the night of the king's wedding

day. He had had to attend the ceremony out of formality, being captain of the guard. The

king had not met his eyes the entire time. The Lady Peacecraft had never once stopped

smiling. The king had never spoken to him again since that day, unless it was issuing

orders. It was as if their secret and passionate affair had disappeared from history.

//And you were gone,//

But Duo remembered every glorious second of it with a pain of loss that was almost

unendurable.

//But memories,//

//Of you live on………//

This was why he had volunteered to head this last wave of attackers being sent into battle.

He took a deep, steadying breath and walked out onto the square in front of the castle.

With determination in every step, he strode through the ranks of men on horseback,

carrying spears and swords. He heard the excited but worried chatter of the townsfolk

gathered around the square. But all he could see, though he hated it so, was a pair of

deep, loving, blue eyes.

//You looked into my eyes,//

//You had me hypnotised and//

//I can still remember you………//

The king stood on high on the battlements, his Lady Queen on his arm. He stared down at

the assembled troops gathered at the gates who were preparing to ride out of the town

and into the battle. This was their last hope. These soldiers were among the very last and

he doubted very much whether he would see any of them alive again. But they were a

well-drilled team and, with luck, they should be able to -

Heero, in an uncharacteristic manner, suddenly jolted. He could see a cloaked figure

making its way through the ranks to a riderless horse at the front of the cavalry. He

recognised the ridiculous and beautiful braid that hung down the soldier's back. No! Duo

wasn't leading the attack! He couldn't be! He'd be killed………

Images leapt unbidden into Heero's mind, images that he had been able to disregard for a

long time. He could feel the silk running through his fingers and could breathe, once again,

the heady fragrance of clean hay and outdoors that ran rampant through it. He could hear

the whispered murmurings of love in his ear that had been the only thing that had ever

made him feel safe, important, and normal.

//Those moments spent together,//

//Promising forever and//

//I can still remember you………//

"My Lord King?" His wife's voice brought him back to reality. "Are you troubled?"

No, Heero had to forget those times, forget those weakling emotions the guardsman had

been able to scrape out of him. But he had to tear his eyes off the soldier as he mounted

otherwise Heero was afraid that he might to start to remember more.