Part Three

Audrina awoke the next morning to the sound of the Offspring's 'Pretty Fly For A White Guy'. She opened her mouth to sing along, but nothing came out. Getting over her initial shock, Audrina remembered what had happened the previous afternoon. She would never be able to speak or sing again.
Audrina rolled out of bed and walked over to the mirror to admire her newly voluptuous figure. She smiled at herself and opened her mouth. There was no tongue! Audrina had been expecting this of course, but when she saw her strange mouth she realised that there was now another thing she could not do.
Audrina would never be able to French-kiss Taylor Hanson!
Life was cruel.
She pulled a yellow sundress from her suitcase and began to dress herself. As she tugged on the zipper she realised that she was going to have problems with her clothing from now on. The dress still fit but it was very... ah... tight.
However, unlike certain other fairytale heroines who've been in similar situations, Audrina was a smart girl who knew how to make the best of a situation. The tight dress would make her look even *more* attractive to Taylor and the fact that she couldn't speak didn't mean that she couldn't communicate. Audrina put a pen and paper in her bag and left the hotel.
She walked down the street until she came to a newsagency. Audrina loved magazines. Which should she buy today? She was very excited to see the many magazines that weren't available in Australia. There were all these pictures and articles on Hanson that she'd never seen before. How exciting!
Audrina was flicking through Hanson magazines and trying to decide which she wanted when a blonde girl around her age approached and started flicking through magazines. The girl looked at her and smiled. "Are you into Hanson?" she asked.
Being from Whitefern Village and therefore totally oblivious to the persecution Hanson fans suffer, Audrina nodded.
"Me too," the girl replied. "Are you going to their concert tonight?"
Audrina shook her head. It was getting annoying, not being able to say anything.
The girl raised her eyebrows. "I am. My name's Cara."
Audrina was beginning to feel really stupid about not being able to talk to Cara. She held her hand up and removed her paper from her bag. "My name's Audrina," she wrote. "I didn't know there was a concert on."
Cara looked surprised. "You didn't know? It's been advertised for months... Have you got laryngitis?"
Audrina shook her head. "I can't talk. I have no tongue," she wrote, feeling really stupid. Perhaps it would have been better to be a B- cup who could talk than a D-cup who had to write down her every thought.
"No tongue?" Cara asked in disbelief. Audrina opened her mouth. "Oh my god!" Cara said, recoiling in horror. "Poor you! Listen, I have a spare ticket to the concert tonight, so if you want to got with me..."
Audrina's eyes widened with delight.
"I'll take that as a yes?" Cara asked.
"Yes! Yes! Yes! Thank you sooo much," Audrina scribbled urgently.
"Cool. You want to go down to the mall?" Cara asked.
"Yes! Thank you! This is the best birthday present *ever*!" Audrina wrote happily. And it was. A chance to be so close to Taylor on her birthday was a dream come true.