A/N: My DSL decided to die on me *sniffle* so I'm netless for a little bit,
but while I'm waiting for the wonderful people at tech support to fix the
problem, I decided I owe you all another chapter. Here you are , keep
those reviews coming ^_^
*opens up a brand new spakin' box of youkai lawyer seals, also known as disclaimers* Okay, I'm ready to get back to work!! I sadly do not own any teeny tiny part of Inuyasha, not even a lock of that beautiful silver hair *sob* But if I did.*happy smile* Ah well, in my dreams.
Note: This chapter will make use of the idea of chakras, that is points in the body that deal with various issues and hold personal energy. This is an eastern concept and while I'm not sure it applies in Japanese culture, I do apologize if it is out of context, but I thought it would be a good and interesting tool to apply to Kagome's training.
Previously.
"You want to ask Kagome to be your mate?" he said, looking at Inuyasha in a whole new light. Inuyasha shifted nervously, and muttered, "No.I just don't wanna make her mad, cause she'll sit me!"
Shippou snickered again, and picked up the meat from this catch, carrying it in to Kaede to be cooked, all the while thinking how bad Inuyasha was of a liar. ****************
Kagome sat along the edge of the pond, trying to figure out what exactly she was supposed to do here. The water was cool, just enough to be a relief on this hot summer's day, without causing too much of a chill. She dangled her feet in it and looked up at the clear sky.
'Ah well, I might as well enjoy the time to myself,' she thought and quickly slipped off her clothes and slid into the water. It was perfect. She lay back on the surface and let herself float, the sun shining warm upon her. It was so calming, and quiet. She closed her eyes and felt herself sink below the surface. Her eyes flew open as she stared at the surface as she sank lower and lower, but her body wouldn't move at her own will. Finally she stopped sinking and saw herself reflected in the surface. It was like staring at a giant mirror.
'I'm going to die, I'm never going to..wait a second,' she thought and took a breath, and then another one. 'I can breath underwater? Or is this really water? Kaede did say this was a place for only mikos' she thought as the reflection shimmered, and she was no longer alone.
"Kikyo," she whispered, staring at the image of the other miko standing beside her. She felt something well up inside of her and closed her eyes, 'I don't want to see her, please' she asked the mirror, but the image never changed. Kikyo standing there, staring back at her with calm gentle eyes, still as a rock.
'I don't understand,' she thought and Kikyo smiled.
"This is the pool of reflection," she said softly, "It has been a place for mikos throughout the ages to come and contemplate things in their life, seeking solutions from within themselves, in places where they could normally never see."
"Why are you here, helping me?" Kagome asked softly.
"Because, we are sisters and a part of each other," Kikyo replied softly, "You contain the true essence of my soul and so you called to my memories when you entered this pool You and I share a common burden of the heart. This burden effects your abilities as a miko, and you must learn to control them. I am also here to keep you from making my mistake."
"Are my feelings for Inuyasha simply because of you?" Kagome asked.
"No, your feelings are your own. We do not share common likes and dislikes because we share part of the same soul, your love for Inuyasha stems from the same reasons I loved him in life, because he is a good man, burdened with his own troubles." Kikyo held out her hand from the reflection
"Come now, time grows short, and there is much I have to show you. You must learn all you can and quickly." Kagome looked at her confused and took her hand. Power flared up inside her and she felt the world go white for a moment.
"Where am I?" she asked and looked around, "Kikyo?" but there was no answer. There was a swirl of color, and a shadow appeared before her. She took a step back, and watched as the shadow matched her movements.
Something flashed before her eyes, and she was suddenly back in her world, watching her life as it was. School, friends, fun, studying. She saw another scene place itself beside it, dressed as a miko, caring for the injured, playing with the children of the village. Both scenes warmed her heart, and tore at her at the same time. They were both parts of her life, but why did she have to choose? What did she have to choose? Where did she really belong, or did she belong to both? Did she have to choose? She paused, 'I can be a part of both, because I am a part of both. I can live in both worlds for now, its okay. I don't have to decide this very minute where I will spend the rest of my life." The scenes shattered into a million pieces of light and rose to form a sphere, resting above the shadow before her, still not casting any true form to the figure beneath it.
'I think I recognize this,' she thought, 'Grandfather spoke once of these points in the body that effect different things. I think that's what this is. I have to find my focus, and I have to deal with these issues that are bothering me, one by one.'
Another sphere formed around her as she realized this, and rose to the shadow, resting in the middle of what appeared to be the forehead. 'Clarity, thought, ' she remembered that the second point, or chakra dealt with that.
"Osuwari!" echoed around her, and she felt the ground rush up to meet her. "What the?!" she said softly looking around. She felt something around her neck. A rosary, just like the one Inuyasha wore. 'Huh' she thought.
"Osuwari,"
BAM. "Wait, I'm just trying.."
"Osuwari!"
"But."
"Osuwari!"
"STOP IT!" she cried at the top of her lungs and waited. Nothing.it was as if the voice was listening.
"Oh, I get it," she said, picking herself off the proverbial floor, and feeling a lot like a pancake, "I need to start listening a little better, and not be so quick to jump to conclusions. The rosary disappeared and reappeared around the neck of the shadow, glowing softly.
Kagome rubbed her neck, "A little less painful lesson could have gotten the same point across," she mumbled and waited for the next one.
"I love you, and only you," she heard from behind her and spun around. There stood Inuyasha, with Kikyo tight in his embrace. Kagome felt her heart ache with the sound of those words.
'Please, no' she thought, not wanting to see this. She stood helpless as the two shared a passionate kiss. 'Please, what can I learn from this?' Suddenly her hands were filled with her bow, and she had the arrow notched, aimed right at Kikyo.
"Kagome! What are you doing?" Inuyasha shouted and tried to get in her way.
"I won't let her have you, she'll only break your heart again, and I can't let her do that," Kagome cried, "I love you too much for that."
'Wait, what am I saying? I didn't mean to say that, or' she thought as Inuyasha walked towards her.
"Why didn't you ever tell me?" he asked softly, placing his hand before the arrow.
"I was scared, -'Yes I was'- I was afraid you didn't feel the same, and now I know you don't, -'But is that true? Is this just a part of my worries?'- . " Her knees buckled and she fell to her knees. 'Can I handle hearing his true decision? Would I try and kill her, if he really did choose her?'
"Kagome," he whispered and wrapped those wonderfully warm arms around her, "I love you, only you, I meant it." She looked over his shoulder and saw that it was no longer Kikyo standing there, but her, in mikos clothing. She was so distracted by her fears, that she didn't see the truth. He lowered his mouth to hers and fire erupted inside her. The Shikon no Tama rose from her heart, where it had entered after that final battle, and rose high above them, showering her in rosy light. Then it settled into the shadow that stood, ever watchful before her. Inuyasha vanished and she felt the ache inside her at his parting.
Kagome fell to her knees, breathing heavily. Inside she felt so odd, as if half of her was solid, and the other half shaky and uncertain. She bowed her head to the floor whispering, "I can do this, I have to do this," like a calming mantra.
"Yes, Kagome-chan, you can." Sango's voice whispered in her ear.
"Kagome-sama, I have faith in you." Miroku
"We can't do it without you, you are a brave fighter." 'Shippou' she thought with tears in her eyes.
"You are more than a shard detector, I trust you in a battle, I know you won't let me down." 'Inuyasha' she thought and stood, feeling something change. Her clothing was different. She wore armor similar to Sango's.
"Yes, yes I am valuable. I know, that sometimes I can't fight like Sango, or I don't have Miroku or Inuyasha's courage, but I do what I can when I can. I am a part of the group, I have just as much value as the rest of them!" She said softly. The armor shimmered on her body and disappeared, reappearing on the shadow before her, glowing around the stomach.
'Two more,' she thought to herself, and looked around. Nothing, everything was oddly quiet.
"Mamma," came a soft cry and she spun around, to see a blur of black and silver fly at her waist. She glanced down into a pair of green eyes staring up at her, "Mamma, I missed you!"
'Mamma' she thought and looked around, "I'm sorry, you must be mistaken," she said and froze. The little girl had fangs, and silver streaks in her ebony hair.
"Oh Mamma, you're silly," she giggled, "Come on, Onii-chan is waiting!" she pulled at Kagome's hand. Shippou appeared, older by a few years, sitting beneath a tree beside an older Miroku. Kagome stared at all of them, amazed.
'My daughter,' she thought and felt arms around her waist, "We were worried, you disappeared like that," came a farmiliar voice in her ear. 'Inuyasha,' she thought and closed her eyes. Realization struck. Family, A place where she belonged, with people she belonged with. Shippou, who as a child had treated her like a surrogate was now her adopted son, Miroku has become like an older brother. Sango, where was Sango.
As if on cue, Sango appeared from the sky, on Kirara's back, "I'm sorry I'm late, I ran into a messy youkai on the way."
'Sango is my sister, and my closest friend. I have Inuyasha, and our beautiful child. Everything is as it should be.'
The little girl at her waist smiled brightly and ran off towards the shadow, as the scenery once again vanished. She paused and turned back, waiving to Kagome, "Bye Mamma, I will see you soon!" and disappeared into the dark figure.
"I understand now, I was afraid of being alone, afraid of being hurt, afraid of being a burden, but I'm not any of these things. I am loved, and wanted and welcome, I'm exactly where I'm supposed to be at this moment." Kagome said out loud, smiling, as a great sense of peace filled her. A gentle breeze swept across her, and circled her, then wrapped itself around the shadow. The shadow stepped closer, and she realized it was herself, in mikos clothing, as in the vision with Inuyasha. This time it was different, the hakama pants she wore were a rich forest green in color, instead of the traditional red. Her hair was tied back like Kikyo's however, wrapped in a single piece of white cloth.
"Yes Kagome, I am you," it said with a smile, "We are a part of each other, and it is time we were returned together." The other Kagome stepped forward, drifting like a ghost, and Kagome closed her eyes as she felt her pass into her body. Suddenly everything inside herself clicked, like the key in a lock. She felt herself rising upwards, and felt warmth on her face. Slowly she opened her eyes.
She was lying on the shores of the pond, in the soft fragrent grass. Slowly Kagome sat up, feeling the odd disoriented feeling of being back in a physical body. She glanced up at the sky, and smiled.
"I understand," she whispered and saw the red tinge above her.
"I have to get back to Kaede's" she said and stood, making her way back to the path from where she came. As she entered the village, the sun was just setting behind the hills, and it seemed like she was the only person around. Her footsteps left no sound as she reached Kaede's hut and pushed aside the covereing of the door.
Everyone was seated around the fire, and stared up at her with surprise as she entered, except Kaede. She stood and placed her arm on Kagome's helping her to the fire, and handing her a bowl of rice.
"Eat now child, and then get rest, all can wait till morning," she said calmly, while Shippou stared at her with an open mouth, and Inuyasha looked like he swallowed a cat. Kagome nodded slowly, amazed at the sense of peace she felt as she carefully savored each grain. When she had finished, a still awed Shippou handed her a piece of his rabbit and she nodded her thanks. Her voice seemed frozen in her throat. She ate this as well, and had just placed the roasting stick into the fire when everything spun and she felt herself begin to fall. Warm arms caught her and she stared up at the concerned face of Inuyasha.
'I'm alright,' she thought but couldn't get her lips to move. He moved her to lay on one of the futons, and she smiled her thanks, before drifting off to sleep.
************
"Kaede-baba, what did you do to her?!" Inuyasha snarled, turning his attentions back to the older priestess. Shippou nodded, having moved to sit guard beside the sleeping Kagome.
"Yeah, she even smells different," he piped up.
"I have done nothing to her, she has chosen this path herself. Do not give her grief over it just yet, she has been through a great ordeal and will need her rest. She has simply accepted herself, she has faced the mirror of her soul and placed together the pieces that were loose." Kaede moved away from the fire and took to her own futon.
"Feh," snarled Inuyasha, sitting crosslegged in the corner of the hut, watching Kagome sleep soundly, her face at perfect peace. Shippou curled up beside her, as he always did, and was making those annoyingly cute noises that he did when he slept.
A/N: Hehehehe.LONG!!! I know, I hope you all enjoy this!!!
*opens up a brand new spakin' box of youkai lawyer seals, also known as disclaimers* Okay, I'm ready to get back to work!! I sadly do not own any teeny tiny part of Inuyasha, not even a lock of that beautiful silver hair *sob* But if I did.*happy smile* Ah well, in my dreams.
Note: This chapter will make use of the idea of chakras, that is points in the body that deal with various issues and hold personal energy. This is an eastern concept and while I'm not sure it applies in Japanese culture, I do apologize if it is out of context, but I thought it would be a good and interesting tool to apply to Kagome's training.
Previously.
"You want to ask Kagome to be your mate?" he said, looking at Inuyasha in a whole new light. Inuyasha shifted nervously, and muttered, "No.I just don't wanna make her mad, cause she'll sit me!"
Shippou snickered again, and picked up the meat from this catch, carrying it in to Kaede to be cooked, all the while thinking how bad Inuyasha was of a liar. ****************
Kagome sat along the edge of the pond, trying to figure out what exactly she was supposed to do here. The water was cool, just enough to be a relief on this hot summer's day, without causing too much of a chill. She dangled her feet in it and looked up at the clear sky.
'Ah well, I might as well enjoy the time to myself,' she thought and quickly slipped off her clothes and slid into the water. It was perfect. She lay back on the surface and let herself float, the sun shining warm upon her. It was so calming, and quiet. She closed her eyes and felt herself sink below the surface. Her eyes flew open as she stared at the surface as she sank lower and lower, but her body wouldn't move at her own will. Finally she stopped sinking and saw herself reflected in the surface. It was like staring at a giant mirror.
'I'm going to die, I'm never going to..wait a second,' she thought and took a breath, and then another one. 'I can breath underwater? Or is this really water? Kaede did say this was a place for only mikos' she thought as the reflection shimmered, and she was no longer alone.
"Kikyo," she whispered, staring at the image of the other miko standing beside her. She felt something well up inside of her and closed her eyes, 'I don't want to see her, please' she asked the mirror, but the image never changed. Kikyo standing there, staring back at her with calm gentle eyes, still as a rock.
'I don't understand,' she thought and Kikyo smiled.
"This is the pool of reflection," she said softly, "It has been a place for mikos throughout the ages to come and contemplate things in their life, seeking solutions from within themselves, in places where they could normally never see."
"Why are you here, helping me?" Kagome asked softly.
"Because, we are sisters and a part of each other," Kikyo replied softly, "You contain the true essence of my soul and so you called to my memories when you entered this pool You and I share a common burden of the heart. This burden effects your abilities as a miko, and you must learn to control them. I am also here to keep you from making my mistake."
"Are my feelings for Inuyasha simply because of you?" Kagome asked.
"No, your feelings are your own. We do not share common likes and dislikes because we share part of the same soul, your love for Inuyasha stems from the same reasons I loved him in life, because he is a good man, burdened with his own troubles." Kikyo held out her hand from the reflection
"Come now, time grows short, and there is much I have to show you. You must learn all you can and quickly." Kagome looked at her confused and took her hand. Power flared up inside her and she felt the world go white for a moment.
"Where am I?" she asked and looked around, "Kikyo?" but there was no answer. There was a swirl of color, and a shadow appeared before her. She took a step back, and watched as the shadow matched her movements.
Something flashed before her eyes, and she was suddenly back in her world, watching her life as it was. School, friends, fun, studying. She saw another scene place itself beside it, dressed as a miko, caring for the injured, playing with the children of the village. Both scenes warmed her heart, and tore at her at the same time. They were both parts of her life, but why did she have to choose? What did she have to choose? Where did she really belong, or did she belong to both? Did she have to choose? She paused, 'I can be a part of both, because I am a part of both. I can live in both worlds for now, its okay. I don't have to decide this very minute where I will spend the rest of my life." The scenes shattered into a million pieces of light and rose to form a sphere, resting above the shadow before her, still not casting any true form to the figure beneath it.
'I think I recognize this,' she thought, 'Grandfather spoke once of these points in the body that effect different things. I think that's what this is. I have to find my focus, and I have to deal with these issues that are bothering me, one by one.'
Another sphere formed around her as she realized this, and rose to the shadow, resting in the middle of what appeared to be the forehead. 'Clarity, thought, ' she remembered that the second point, or chakra dealt with that.
"Osuwari!" echoed around her, and she felt the ground rush up to meet her. "What the?!" she said softly looking around. She felt something around her neck. A rosary, just like the one Inuyasha wore. 'Huh' she thought.
"Osuwari,"
BAM. "Wait, I'm just trying.."
"Osuwari!"
"But."
"Osuwari!"
"STOP IT!" she cried at the top of her lungs and waited. Nothing.it was as if the voice was listening.
"Oh, I get it," she said, picking herself off the proverbial floor, and feeling a lot like a pancake, "I need to start listening a little better, and not be so quick to jump to conclusions. The rosary disappeared and reappeared around the neck of the shadow, glowing softly.
Kagome rubbed her neck, "A little less painful lesson could have gotten the same point across," she mumbled and waited for the next one.
"I love you, and only you," she heard from behind her and spun around. There stood Inuyasha, with Kikyo tight in his embrace. Kagome felt her heart ache with the sound of those words.
'Please, no' she thought, not wanting to see this. She stood helpless as the two shared a passionate kiss. 'Please, what can I learn from this?' Suddenly her hands were filled with her bow, and she had the arrow notched, aimed right at Kikyo.
"Kagome! What are you doing?" Inuyasha shouted and tried to get in her way.
"I won't let her have you, she'll only break your heart again, and I can't let her do that," Kagome cried, "I love you too much for that."
'Wait, what am I saying? I didn't mean to say that, or' she thought as Inuyasha walked towards her.
"Why didn't you ever tell me?" he asked softly, placing his hand before the arrow.
"I was scared, -'Yes I was'- I was afraid you didn't feel the same, and now I know you don't, -'But is that true? Is this just a part of my worries?'- . " Her knees buckled and she fell to her knees. 'Can I handle hearing his true decision? Would I try and kill her, if he really did choose her?'
"Kagome," he whispered and wrapped those wonderfully warm arms around her, "I love you, only you, I meant it." She looked over his shoulder and saw that it was no longer Kikyo standing there, but her, in mikos clothing. She was so distracted by her fears, that she didn't see the truth. He lowered his mouth to hers and fire erupted inside her. The Shikon no Tama rose from her heart, where it had entered after that final battle, and rose high above them, showering her in rosy light. Then it settled into the shadow that stood, ever watchful before her. Inuyasha vanished and she felt the ache inside her at his parting.
Kagome fell to her knees, breathing heavily. Inside she felt so odd, as if half of her was solid, and the other half shaky and uncertain. She bowed her head to the floor whispering, "I can do this, I have to do this," like a calming mantra.
"Yes, Kagome-chan, you can." Sango's voice whispered in her ear.
"Kagome-sama, I have faith in you." Miroku
"We can't do it without you, you are a brave fighter." 'Shippou' she thought with tears in her eyes.
"You are more than a shard detector, I trust you in a battle, I know you won't let me down." 'Inuyasha' she thought and stood, feeling something change. Her clothing was different. She wore armor similar to Sango's.
"Yes, yes I am valuable. I know, that sometimes I can't fight like Sango, or I don't have Miroku or Inuyasha's courage, but I do what I can when I can. I am a part of the group, I have just as much value as the rest of them!" She said softly. The armor shimmered on her body and disappeared, reappearing on the shadow before her, glowing around the stomach.
'Two more,' she thought to herself, and looked around. Nothing, everything was oddly quiet.
"Mamma," came a soft cry and she spun around, to see a blur of black and silver fly at her waist. She glanced down into a pair of green eyes staring up at her, "Mamma, I missed you!"
'Mamma' she thought and looked around, "I'm sorry, you must be mistaken," she said and froze. The little girl had fangs, and silver streaks in her ebony hair.
"Oh Mamma, you're silly," she giggled, "Come on, Onii-chan is waiting!" she pulled at Kagome's hand. Shippou appeared, older by a few years, sitting beneath a tree beside an older Miroku. Kagome stared at all of them, amazed.
'My daughter,' she thought and felt arms around her waist, "We were worried, you disappeared like that," came a farmiliar voice in her ear. 'Inuyasha,' she thought and closed her eyes. Realization struck. Family, A place where she belonged, with people she belonged with. Shippou, who as a child had treated her like a surrogate was now her adopted son, Miroku has become like an older brother. Sango, where was Sango.
As if on cue, Sango appeared from the sky, on Kirara's back, "I'm sorry I'm late, I ran into a messy youkai on the way."
'Sango is my sister, and my closest friend. I have Inuyasha, and our beautiful child. Everything is as it should be.'
The little girl at her waist smiled brightly and ran off towards the shadow, as the scenery once again vanished. She paused and turned back, waiving to Kagome, "Bye Mamma, I will see you soon!" and disappeared into the dark figure.
"I understand now, I was afraid of being alone, afraid of being hurt, afraid of being a burden, but I'm not any of these things. I am loved, and wanted and welcome, I'm exactly where I'm supposed to be at this moment." Kagome said out loud, smiling, as a great sense of peace filled her. A gentle breeze swept across her, and circled her, then wrapped itself around the shadow. The shadow stepped closer, and she realized it was herself, in mikos clothing, as in the vision with Inuyasha. This time it was different, the hakama pants she wore were a rich forest green in color, instead of the traditional red. Her hair was tied back like Kikyo's however, wrapped in a single piece of white cloth.
"Yes Kagome, I am you," it said with a smile, "We are a part of each other, and it is time we were returned together." The other Kagome stepped forward, drifting like a ghost, and Kagome closed her eyes as she felt her pass into her body. Suddenly everything inside herself clicked, like the key in a lock. She felt herself rising upwards, and felt warmth on her face. Slowly she opened her eyes.
She was lying on the shores of the pond, in the soft fragrent grass. Slowly Kagome sat up, feeling the odd disoriented feeling of being back in a physical body. She glanced up at the sky, and smiled.
"I understand," she whispered and saw the red tinge above her.
"I have to get back to Kaede's" she said and stood, making her way back to the path from where she came. As she entered the village, the sun was just setting behind the hills, and it seemed like she was the only person around. Her footsteps left no sound as she reached Kaede's hut and pushed aside the covereing of the door.
Everyone was seated around the fire, and stared up at her with surprise as she entered, except Kaede. She stood and placed her arm on Kagome's helping her to the fire, and handing her a bowl of rice.
"Eat now child, and then get rest, all can wait till morning," she said calmly, while Shippou stared at her with an open mouth, and Inuyasha looked like he swallowed a cat. Kagome nodded slowly, amazed at the sense of peace she felt as she carefully savored each grain. When she had finished, a still awed Shippou handed her a piece of his rabbit and she nodded her thanks. Her voice seemed frozen in her throat. She ate this as well, and had just placed the roasting stick into the fire when everything spun and she felt herself begin to fall. Warm arms caught her and she stared up at the concerned face of Inuyasha.
'I'm alright,' she thought but couldn't get her lips to move. He moved her to lay on one of the futons, and she smiled her thanks, before drifting off to sleep.
************
"Kaede-baba, what did you do to her?!" Inuyasha snarled, turning his attentions back to the older priestess. Shippou nodded, having moved to sit guard beside the sleeping Kagome.
"Yeah, she even smells different," he piped up.
"I have done nothing to her, she has chosen this path herself. Do not give her grief over it just yet, she has been through a great ordeal and will need her rest. She has simply accepted herself, she has faced the mirror of her soul and placed together the pieces that were loose." Kaede moved away from the fire and took to her own futon.
"Feh," snarled Inuyasha, sitting crosslegged in the corner of the hut, watching Kagome sleep soundly, her face at perfect peace. Shippou curled up beside her, as he always did, and was making those annoyingly cute noises that he did when he slept.
A/N: Hehehehe.LONG!!! I know, I hope you all enjoy this!!!
