Snake: Is there a *hic* problem, officer?

Cop: Sir, I need you to step out of the mantis-like vehicle

**Snake steps out of Metal Gear Ray and falls to the ground with a thump**

Cop: I need to see your license and registration please.

**Snake gets up**

Snake: Did I do something wrong, *hic* officer?

Cop: I've had reports from the public about a giant robot terrorizing Manhattan Island while destroying 12 different bars and it's bandana-bound driver robbing at least 17 different tobacco barns.

Snake: Look, I had nothin' to do *hic* with it! I was just... *hic* ... I was just... *hic* ... I was just... *hic* taking it to the car wash for my mama.

Cop: License and registration now!

Snake: Oh, well all I have are these um... *hic* ... these whatchamacallits. *hic* Dog tags! Yeah. there might be some uh... license plate... or something on the back of *hic* Metal Gear's head.

Cop: ... that's alot of dog tags you're wearing.

Snake: Yeah! *hic* I'm trying to get the... uh.. *hic* stealth.. camel.

Cop: You mean your piloting a 50 foot tall robot that belongs to the Marines and you don't even have a proper driver's license for it? Sir, do you know how serious this crime is? how much have you had to drink tonight?

Snake: You need *hic* a license to drive Metal Gear?

Cop: Yes sir, it's the law. Any soldier who pilots a 50 foot robot with titanium armor, lasers and nuclear warheads must have license and proof of insurance. Now how much have you had to drink tonight?

Snake: Uh.. *hic* wow. I'm gonna need help with this one

**Snake calls Otacon over codec**

Snake: Uh.. Otacon?

Otacon: Snake? I see the cops have stopped you.

Snake: How much have I had to *hic* drink tonight?

Otacon: Well, according to your nanomachine vital signs, and calculating skin tone and body trembling. It looks like you've had 12 bottles, 3 martinis, 5 shots of tequila, and... wait, make that 14 bottles.

Snake: Oh, well that's not *hic* too much, is it?

Cop: Sir? Sir? Are you listening to me?

Snake: Emma, I think he's fixing to *hic* call for backup!

Otacon: ... Emma?

Snake: What's your name again?

Otacon: Otacon.

Snake: Oxymoron! I think ... *hic*.

Otacon: ...

**Codec cuts off**

**Snake pulls out his weapon**

Snake: Feeze! ... *hic* Head behind your hands, *hic* now?

Cop: Are you trying to hold me hostage with broken shot glass?

Snake ... *hic*

**Snake dives behind Metal Gear Ray's leg as the cop stares in perplexion**

**Snake uses his codec again**

Snake: Uh... Octopus! We're in trouble! It's the *hic* harrier!

Woman over codec: Welcome to Victoria's Secrets via codec!

Snake: ... whos this! Are you *hic* Foxhound!?

Woman: No, Shalashaska Ocelot said he would call to renew his subscription?

Snake: They're on to me!

**Snake jump out, dashes and hurls himself onto the windshield of the policeman's car, shattering it to shards**

**Cop walks over**

Cop: Is he... asleep?

Snake: Zzzz...