Disclaimer: *Reporter on TV* Artemis Fowl has been stolen! Why any person would do such a thing is unknown, but the story and all characters have suddenly come up missing. If you have any information about these missing plots and persons, PLEASE do not hesitate to call.

Summary: Same as last chapter...

Warning: Attention all Artemis Fowl fans. This story is violent and, unless you are a sadist or an actual action reader, you are advised to STEER CLEAR of this fic. Ok, lemme break this down for some of you slow people. If you are looking for tears/kisses/hugs/mushy junk, get out of here NOW or DIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Excuse me, for a moment, but I must speak. All people who reviewed, I AM SO HAPPY AND I LUV YOU ALL!!!!! *hugs all around for reviewers* For those of you who didn't....Sic 'em, Doragon!

Doragon's C/N: My pleasure...*sets all mean non-reviewers on fire and eats them* Yum, yum, yum...

Secondly, for all of you that tried to flame me...*runs all mean flame people and haters and their reviews through her paper shredder* Bite me...- _-

All right, now that's all cleared up, on to the fic!

***

Chute E1, Haven

Holly fired up the shuttle, fully concentrated on readjusting her headpiece so that she could keep in touch with Foaly and Commander Root.

"Where exactly are we going?" Ember asked with a frown as she approached the cockpit.

Holly didn't even bother to look at the convict. "Behind the yellow line," she growled. "We're going to Tara and then to Fowl Manor, so we can formulate a plan."

She could have sworn the convicted half-dragon was laughing at her!

"You haven't even come up with a plan yet?" Ember asked incredulously. She turned and winked at Artemis, malice mixed with humor stinging in her gaze. "You are gonna die, purebred."

Artemis didn't like the look she gave him. Butler apparently didn't either, he decided, when the seven foot manservant jerked the Doragon up off the ground by her collar.

"I think you'd better learn to watch your mouth," Butler warned. He glared deep into the girl's crimson eyes and suddenly decided he had better put her down. He didn't see fear in those eyes, like he had so many other people who had dared to threaten Artemis. He saw hatred, pure and deep, in those eyes. And it scared him.

"You know," Ember began, brushing herself off when he set her down, "the worst thing about Mud Men purebreds...is that they're so flammable." She held up her hands and they began to glow. She was obviously conjuring fireballs.

Butler had to think fast. He drew his gun, the Sig Sauer, which the LEP had so generously reloaded and returned to him, and aimed at her forehead. Let's see if dragons are bulletproof, he told himself. Artemis, however, was the one who stopped him from shooting.

"Butler, no," Artemis said firmly. Butler was forced to look down at the girl. She had two fireballs pointed at his stomach. Even if he managed to let loose a single shot into her forehead, she could still blow him away twice. It didn't matter which one would shoot--they both would die.

Holly looked over her shoulder, shrugged, and then gunned the throttle, guiding the shuttle into the service tunnel. Maybe she'd have time to make a quick record. She decided to try it.

Butler and Artemis had already strapped themselves into their safety harnesses. Not Ember. She grinned like a loon and watched as the shuttle dipped lower and lower. Holly resisted the urge to scream with pure delight and went lower still. At this rate, she'd break her own record!

Ember made her way back to the cockpit, smiling wickedly. "Going for a new record, are we?" she called over the noise of the rattling ship. When Holly didn't respond, she smirked and raised one of her hands. Could she still do it?

It took a moment for Holly to realize what was happening. The lava was rising! She pulled up sharply, hoping she wouldn't get nipped in the butt by quickly elevating magma. What was going on? She glared at Ember when they were safe, positive she had something to do with it. Ember smiled innocently.

"Yes?" she asked, cocking an eyebrow, daring Holly to say something. She made her way to the back of the shuttle interior, passing a warning glance at Butler.

Holly stared after her in disbelief. Who was this girl that denied the LEP and Mud Men alike? That could create fireballs like goblins, and was a better thief than the notorious Mulch Diggums himself? That could make lava rise? She was truly a Blaze, Holly decided as she flew the shuttle.

They had to get rid of her.

En route to Fowl Manor

Artemis watched Ember carefully as she poked at the windows of the Bentley. He raised one eyebrow curiously; obviously it had been hundreds of years since she'd been on the surface world. Which was impossible, since she was only sixteen.

"They keep the rain and wind from getting in," he explained, before Ember shot him a withering glare. If looks could kill.

"I'm not stupid, purebred," Ember growled furiously. "I understand your weak magic. Your...technology." She said it as if it were some strange disease. She stared out the window at the passing countryside. "My grandfather used to tell me about the surface world. About the serfs and knights. And the dragons that dared to venture beyond the boundaries of early magic." She spoke with a sense of longing.

"Serfs?" Artemis asked, cocking his head slightly to the side in momentary confusion. "Knights? You're talking about the Middle Ages?"

Ember frowned deeply, the scowl almost scarring her pretty features. "Those were real warriors. I wish I could have lived then. They burned you for the littlest things. Burned. No lethal injections. No life imprisonment. No rotting forever due to radiation and snow." She gave a sigh of contentment. "Burned."

Holly tried not to look at her and Artemis sensed her discomfort, but chose not to say anything. He could see her sweating, now that they were driving through Ireland and her visor was off. He wondered if it was too hot in the car with Ember here.

"It's cold in here," Ember sighed, slumping down in her seat, tugging a huge coats around her shoulders uncomfortably. "Don't you feel it? I think I'm going to freeze..." She was getting quieter as she spoke, until her final words were almost non-existent.

Fowl Manor

"Well, EXCUSE ME, your highness, but that's as hot as hot springs get! Take it or leave it!"

Butler and Artemis looked up to see Juliet storming down the hallway and into the study. "I have had just about enough of that fireball-tossing freak!" she screamed. "I tried to be nice to her! All I said was that she would look prettier if she washed all of that ash out of her hair and she burnt a hole in my new shirt!" She thrust the shirt in Butler's face. "Look at this!"

Holly couldn't help but suppress a smile. When she had been prisoner at Fowl Manor four years ago, annoying Juliet had been her favorite activity while trying to escape. Odd how fairies, even the most diverse, loved to indulge in the same hobbies.

Butler eyes widened and then narrowed. He glanced down at Artemis, who sat as his computer, stunned. "Artemis, there has to be another way," he said, choosing his words carefully. "Look at how much trouble she's causing. Besides, she hasn't even tried to locate Chimaera yet. We don't even know if she can."

"Juliet," Holly began, turning to the reluctant teenager, "how hot are your hot springs?"

"FREEZING COLD!" Ember's voice rang throughout the entire manor, as if she'd heard them from the other side of the house. Chances are, she did.

Juliet pouted, scowling towards the hot springs where she'd left Ember. "At least boiling temperature. You can see the water evaporate! There's so much condensation in that room, it could water Death Valley, dammit!" She crossed her arms, glowering at her new shoes. "And that insensitive little brat still says it's FREEZING!"

"It probably is to her," Holly told her, careful not to mention that Ember was a third dragon--even though Juliet knew she was a fairy, you could never be too careful. "Her condition is very special. She finds it hard live in temperatures under ninety degrees Fahrenheit."

"Which explains why she was so afraid to be sent to Russia," Butler nodded when Juliet left to figure out a way to make the hot springs warmer for the annoying convict.

Artemis nodded. "It was so obvious. Fire and ice are enemies to extremes. She was even reluctant to enter the hot springs, since it's water. It's like she's afraid she'll go up in steam." He leaned back in his chair, head cushioned by his folded hands as he pondered. Butler recognized the expression, but Holly still chose to speak aloud.

"Chances are," Holly frowned, "the Doppleganger will strike when we least expect. Either dusk or dawn."

Butler made a move to shush her while Artemis thought up an ingenious plan to save them all. He shuddered remembering the plans he had thought up while trying to rip off the LEP and when trying to rescue his father. Sure, those plans had worked out all right in the end. It was carrying them out that made them so terrifying.

"Military tactics suggest that she will strike at night. Every good hunter knows that," Butler whispered to Holly, making it clear that they should not speak loud enough to disturb Artemis.

Holly nodded in confirmation. "Exactly. You forget, she controls an LEP officer's mind and body. She knows all the rules, and how to break them to favor her. Just like Artemis." She tilted her head in the young man's direction for emphasis.

Police Plaza, Ops Booth

Foaly grumbled. "Donkey work. I can't believe I'm doing this," he growled as he kept rewiring the computer's mainframe. A spark caught him in the wrist. "D'Arvit!" he shrieked, tossing the offending wire to the ground. "Why am I even looking through here? All of the files are there..."

The screen blinked into life in the background and Foaly glanced up, frowning. "What the..."

"Doing research, centaur?" Chimaera Blaze's voice crackled through the computer's communication waves, another invention of Foaly's. "Would you like some help?"

Foaly stood up immediately, glaring at Chimaera's smug expression. "Not your help, lady." His eyes slowly wandered to the bottom-left corner of the screen to the locator, which he had programmed into the communication screen to pinpoint whoever was talking to him. This was mainly patented for hostage situations, but, it would serve just as well in this case.

"Testy, are we?" Chimaera said smugly. Her gaze followed Foaly's and she snorted in contempt. "A locator? Please..." Foaly heard the tapping of keys and the locator disappeared. "There, now...that's better..." She grinned wickedly and Foaly couldn't help but wonder how an elf's teeth got so pointed and evil-looking.

Suppressing a groan at the disappearance of the locator, Foaly stepped back away from the screen slowly. "What brings your smug self here, anyway? I figured you'd be waiting at the Fowl Manor or something. Unfinished business? Or maybe you're turning yourself in?"

Chimaera laughed loudly. "That's so funny! And here I thought all of you centaurs were serious types!" She wiped away an imaginary tear and glared through the screen. "The hell if I'm ever going back the Lower Elements. And I know that you've got my granddaughter on your side. I'm crazy, not stupid. I was just making a little phone call to see how you darling LEP are doing."

Foaly snorted. "My ass. You're probably sabotaging the network." His eyes searched for a way to stall her. He slowly reached over to hit the intercom button so that the rest of the plaza could hear the conversation.

"I wouldn't," Chimaera warned, her statement followed by the usual tapping of keys. "I've just uploaded a virus into your computer, darling." Another wicked grin.

Foaly crossed his arms, unable to hide his smile. "A lot of good that'll do you, Chimaera. Ever since the Koboi incident a few years back, I've upgraded all of my virus protection programs. All I have to do is give it the command, and the system sends the virus right back into your computer. Looks like you're not as smart as you thought."

Instead of the angry response most of his enemies gave when they had messed up, Foaly only heard more laughter. "I think not, horse-man." He heard the clicking of more keys. "It pays to kill centaurs, darling. I'd advise you to watch and learn." The screen blinked quickly until it was bright white. Foaly squinted, unable to make out Chimaera's face anymore.

CRASH IS IMMINENT

Foaly ran to the computer, desperately trying to restart and save his computer before it crashed. The screen froze and he heard sparks erupting in the background. His backup disk and files were gone as well. "Shit!" he growled, banging on the screen, knowing it would do him no good. The lights gave way last, leaving Foaly completely alone in the dark.

"The system will go back up in twenty-four hours, darling." Chimaera's voice still lingered in the room, for some reason. "I suggest you make yourself comfortable. After all, after Artemis Fowl is dead...you can do all the research you want." And, with that, her voice faded into the darkness of the Operations Booth.

Fowl Manor

"Well, have you got a plan yet, purebred?"

Artemis rubbed his eyelids. "You can't rush genius, Ember. Go play with Juliet. Paint your nails, or claws, or whatever." He gritted his teeth. Or whatever? God, he needed sleep.

"It's your future," Ember grumbled as she started out of the room. "However short that future may be."

Holly Short watched her leave the room and glanced at Butler, who nodded. She slid down from the large couch she had been lounging on and followed Ember, careful not to get too close. Ember was emanating serious rage, which, in a dragon's case, meant serious heat.

"What do you want, purebred?" Ember growled, whirling around to face her as soon as they reached the foyer. "I don't think this is the way to the bathroom." She cracked one of her knuckles impatiently as Holly held her ground.

"You can't push everyone around, Blaze," Holly said sternly, crossing her arms. "You do know that you're just going back to Howler's Peak after this. You're not in any position to give orders."

Ember frowned. "I am in any and every position, purebred, to--" Something caught her eye, making her cut off. She snatched a picture frame up from the mantle above the fireplace, taking a second to revel in high flames which the aura of rage around her had coaxed to life. She glared at the picture, in deep concentration.

Holly glared at her. "What's the matter with you?"

"Why aren't the Butlers in this picture?" Ember asked impatiently, handing the frame to Holly.

Holly glanced at it. "The Butlers work for the Fowls. It's doubtful that they'd be in the family picture." She gave it back to Ember, who scanned it again. "They probably have family pictures elsewhere."

"Where do they stay?" Ember demanded, gritted her teeth. She didn't even bother to look at Holly.

Holly cocked an eyebrow. "In the lodge outside, why?"

"I've a hunch," Ember answered, heading for the back door. "Keep Artemis and Butler together at all times. And don't let either one get any sleep. Like Artemis said, we're on borrowed time." It was the first time Holly had heard Ember use Artemis and Butler's correct names, instead of 'purebred.'

Holly tilted her head to the side as she watched Ember leave. "No sleep?" she whispered as she made her way back. She'd better buzz in to HQ and see how they were faring with the deleted files. "Foaly, how are those files coming?" Nothing but static. "Foaly?"

Ember wandered into the lodge quietly. Guns, knives, a few swords. Bedrooms and a bathroom. A kitchen. Recreation center. This wasn't a lodge. It was a fort. "Were are you..." she muttered, opening a closet. Surely a family as extensive as the Butlers would have some type of records. Journals. Photographs. Something. Anything. "Ah," she smiled when she pulled a framed picture from a dusty cardboard box in the back of closet.

"What're you doing in here?"

Ember closed her eyes irritably. If only she could turn invisible, like her grandmother had been able to when she had escaped Fowl Manor two days ago. She slowly turned around. Juliet.

"Get out," Juliet growled, flexing her arms. "Before I throw you out." She looked surprised when Ember simply walked past her and sat on the bed, staring at the picture she'd found.

"Shut up," Ember directed, holding up her hand to shush Juliet before she could protest. Her eyes scanned the picture and she tilted her head to the side momentarily. "How long ago was this taken?" she inquired, flashing the picture in front of Juliet. At Juliet's silence, she commanded, "Speak."

"Fifteen, sixteen years ago," Juliet answered, daring to sit beside Ember, pointing to the people in the photograph. "That's our family. That's me. I was about four. I was so cute." She beamed proudly, pleased at the way she looked when she was a toddler.

"Where's Butler?" Ember asked, again frowning in frustration.

Juliet pointed again. "He had been visiting from training to take part in the wedding." The boy she pointed to looked exactly like Artemis. Ember's expression deepened as she glanced up from the picture.

"Wedding?"

"Yeah," Juliet answered, leaning back on the bed, supported by her arms. "Our mom died when I was young. Big assignment at the signing of a treaty that didn't turn out so well. So Dad remarried."

"I see," Ember said. She didn't offer her condolences--she had more important things to worry about. "Who was the stepmother?"

"She was a very nice woman," Juliet replied, pointed to the picture of a young woman with tanned skin and chestnut-brown hair. "But, now that I think of it, I can't remember her name."

"Was?" Ember asked, glancing back at the picture. "You don't remember her name? Why not? Isn't she here with you now?" Her eyes were blazing with excitement as the mystery unfolded around her. She realized as soon as Juliet took a moment to clear her throat. "She died as well?"

Juliet nodded slowly. "I never really got time to know her. She died young. Something about a blood disease."

"Did she and your father ever have any children together?" Ember questioned, glaring hard at the picture now. It was possible. She considered holding her breath.

"No," Juliet said. Ember hoped she didn't see her sigh. "At least, I don't think so. Technically, I wouldn't know. The person you'd want to ask is probably her mother, if that woman is still alive. Her name was...uh...um...I think it was Christine...or Casey...Chrissy...it was 'C' something. C. Maria!"

"Her mother?" Ember asked, glancing from Juliet to the picture. It was true--in the upper-right corner was a middle-age woman. She was obviously related to Juliet's stepmother. "Her mother...C. Maria..."

Juliet sighed, crossing her arms. "That's all. Now, if you don't mind, I'm going to bed. I'm sure you can find your way back to the manor." She left the room to change clothes and get ready for bed. Ember sat for a moment in silence. A sweet stepmother. Disappearing people. Butler and Artemis, looking alike as young men. Something was terribly wrong here, she realized. The reality of the situation dawned on her. She had to get to Artemis. More importantly, she had to find Butler.

But first, a few phone calls had to be made...

"Oh, Juliet..." Ember followed Juliet's path, leaving nothing but a tiny pile of ashes on the hardwood floor at the foot of Juliet's bed.

***

Okay, people, I admit, I have NO idea how old Butler is. But, for this fic to work, we have to take a moment and pretend he's only about thirty. Okay? Thanks for your cooperation. I knew you'd understand! ^_~ You lovely people always do!

Police Officer: Okay, you're under arrest!

Ahhh! For what?!

Police Officer: *cocks gun* For attempting to claim Artemis Fowl as your own, instead of paying homage to the rightful owner! Eoin Colfer!

Ack! I admit it! I stole Artemis! Can you blame me?! *in jail* Anyone wanna post my bail...? Please? The set price is 15 reviews! PLEASE free me so that I might post the next chapter for your entertainment!

~ ChaosHavoc