Title: The Sweetest Thing
Author: AmandaLynn125 (amandalynn99@earthlink.net)
Rating: NC-17
Pairing: Clark/Lana
Spoilers: "Nicodemus"
Disclaimer: I don't own Smallville or any characters contained therein.
Summary: Sequel to "The Longest Road." (Haha, now you have to read that one to understand where this came from.) Clark helps Lana become comfortable with her body again.
"Let's go home."
The words had never sounded sweeter. But Lana was afraid. She had missed Clark so much while she was in the hospital. The thought of him was the only thing that kept her motivated most of the time. The memories of the intense make-out sessions they'd had in the loft kept her going when she would have rather given up.
Now that she was out, however, she had to face the reality of Clark's expectations. Lana now weighed fifteen pounds more than when she had gone in, putting her at 98, but she was still awfully thin. She had no breasts to speak of, and her hipbones and ribs jutted grotesquely from her skin. She desperately wanted to be close to him, but she was afraid her shriveled, emaciated body would turn him off.
Clark could tell that Lana had something on her mind. Pulling the key out of the truck's ignition, he turned to her. "Lana, is something wrong?"
"Clark, I missed you so much," she breathed.
He smiled his million-watt smile. "I missed you too, Lana. I'm so glad you're home. I've missed everything about you--your silky hair, your gorgeous eyes…"
"Clark, stop!" she said harshly. He couldn't possibly be talking about her. She wasn't beautiful anymore. She had destroyed it all in her endless quest to be perfect. She knew how she looked. She didn't want anyone else to know. Her hair still hung limp, her eyes were still dull and slightly unfocused, and her body was still pathetically thin and weak.
"Okay, Lana, I'll stop," he said softly. He opened the door and quickly walked around the truck to help her out. She was still slightly unsteady, but Clark held her as tightly as he could without hurting her. He guided her up to the loft that she had missed so much.
The loft was still decorated the way it had been the last time she was there. The thick fleece blanket that they cuddled on was still surrounded by candles and heart-shaped confetti. Clark had gotten a huge bouquet of roses from Nell for Lana's homecoming and arranged them in a beautiful crystal vase. He had also bought several strings of icicle lights and strung them along the walls of the loft. It was beautiful, so beautiful that Lana burst into tears.
Clark helped Lana sit down on the blanket and put his arm around her. "Lana, what is it?"
"I don't deserve this," she wailed. "I don't deserve this and I don't deserve you! This is all so beautiful, and I'm so ugly--it's not right!"
"Lana, you're not ugly," he assured her gently, rubbing her back. "You're beautiful, Lana, inside and out. It's what you have inside that makes you beautiful--that sweet, loving soul that shines through in everything you do. You, Lana Lang, are the most beautiful girl I've ever seen, and always will be."
She buried her face in his shoulder and wept. "You really mean that?" she whispered.
He tipped her chin up so that she was looking directly into his eyes. "I really mean that," he promised her. "Trust me, Lana. I would never lie to you."
She wiped a few remaining tears from her cheeks. "I know you wouldn't," she assured him. "It's just so hard to feel beautiful in this pathetic wreck of a body."
"Lana, your body is not a pathetic wreck," he told her gently, hoping his words would break through her skewed perceptions. "Maybe it's not what you want it to be yet, but that doesn't mean you should call it ugly and pathetic. If you tell yourself you're beautiful, you'll be beautiful."
She smiled halfheartedly. "And then I'll click my heels three times and say 'There's no place like home.'" Her tone was light, not bitingly sarcastic like Chloe's.
"There's no place like here," Clark whispered in her ear. He kissed her neck softly and gently, and then moved down to her still-protruding collarbone. It felt so good, and yet Lana still couldn't understand why Clark would be interested in a horrible creature like herself. She wanted to pull away, but Clark held her close.
"Lana, I love you and I want you to be happy. Please, let me make you happy."
"I love you too, Clark, but I'm scared."
"Of what?" he asked tenderly.
"How could you love someone like me?"
"How could I not love someone like you?" He smiled. "Lana, you don't have to be perfect for me to love you. I love you for exactly what you are. You don't have to be afraid."
Lana nearly broke down in tears again, she was so relieved. You don't have to be perfect. He was the first person who'd ever said that aloud. She had spent her whole life trying to live up to everyone's expectations of perfection. Just knowing that Clark accepted and loved her no matter what made her feel a thousand times more secure.
Clark gently unbuttoned Lana's sweater. Lana felt a tingle of excitement spreading through her body. Could it be true? Could she really be about to lose her virginity? She had turned Whitney down at every opportunity, simply saying that she wasn't ready. She suddenly understood why. With Whitney there were expectations. But with Clark, she felt safe. Loved.
Clark gently slipped her sweater down off of her shoulders, exposing her barely-needed bra. It hung listlessly from her shoulders, having nothing really to anchor it in place. Clark reached around and unfastened her bra. "Clark, I…I'm not…I don't…"
"Shhhhh," he whispered. "It's okay, Lana. It's okay. We don't have to do anything you don't want to do."
"It's not that, it's just…I lost so much weight, and now…"
"I know, sweetheart, I know." He refastened her bra and pulled away from her. Instead, he pulled off his own shirt. "I won't do anything you're not comfortable with," he assured her. "What do you want?"
She leaned over and gave him a deep, passionate kiss. "I want this," she whispered. "I want this."
She started kissing his neck, the way he had done to her before. She loved the feeling of his warm, soft skin on her lips. She ran her hands over his muscular chest and back, relishing the sensation. Her lips moved down to his collarbone, and she daringly reached down in his lap and felt his erect cock through his jeans. She'd never felt a cock before, or seen one, and it both terrified and thrilled her to have her hand on Clark's.
Clark took her hand and removed it from his cock. He reached down and unzipped his jeans, slipping them down. He unbuttoned his boxers and placed her hand gently on the shaft of his cock. The hot, supple skin felt good against her hand. She had a feeling that Clark could sense her inexperience. She didn't want to ruin the moment, but she also didn't have the slightest clue what to do next.
"What do you want me to do?" she whispered, blushing slightly at the absurdity of the question. "I mean, I've never done this before."
"What do you want to do?" he asked her. "I don't want you to do anything you're not ready for." He hoped she couldn't sense the fear and anxiety in his voice. The truth was, he had never been this far either, except with his right hand, and really had no idea what to expect from this either.
"I want…I, um, I want to blow you," she said timidly.
"Um, okay," replied Clark. His heart pounded. Lana Lang, the Lana Lang, had just asked his permission to give him a blowjob! He felt as though the world had just shifted on its axis.
"So what should I do now?" she asked, her face flushing. She couldn't meet his eyes. She couldn't believe it was happening like this.
"Um…uhh…I…just try not to bite," he stammered.
Lana knelt beside him and took his throbbing cock into her mouth. She wrapped her lips around it, running her tongue over the head and under the slight ridge underneath it. Clark moaned softly and Lana smiled inwardly. She was definitely glad he didn't expect her to be perfect. She took her lips off his cock and began exploring it with her tongue, all the way down the shaft. It was smoother and silkier than she expected it to be. She shifted her position, putting her left leg between his so that she could be at a better angle. She encircled his cock gently with her lips and flicked her tongue on the ridge and the head. He groaned, and Lana knew she was doing okay for her first time. She put her hand around the shaft and thrust it up and down as she licked the head. He groaned louder, and she knew he was getting close. She tasted the drops of pre-cum on her tongue and pulled away before he came with a satisfied sigh.
"How was it?" she asked hesitantly, desperately hoping he would say something good.
"Incredible," he breathed. "You're sure you're new at this?"
She grinned. "I'm sure," she replied playfully. She lay down and cuddled up to him, resting her head on his shoulder. "Clark, I love you."
"I love you too, Lana," he answered, still breathing heavily. "I'm so glad you're home."
