SEQ CHAPTER \h \r 1I don't own Beyblade or any of the characters, otherwise I wouldn't be writing this.

I also don't own Evanescence's "October", so don't sue me.

Another installment of my songfic. This is Kai's POV of chapter 2. Kai/Rei still, so if you don't like this you should know not to read it.

Enjoy, and thanks to all my previous reviewers!

October




I can't run anymore,
I fall before you,
Here I am,
I have nothing left


Rei...you dominate my thoughts constantly lately. While you are a pleasant distraction from my past and memories, I am confused as to why I can't get you out of my head.

We've been 'together' for a year now, right? More than that. I'm...happy. It's strange. You make me happy and I can't figure out why. I need to figure this out. What's so special about you?

Though I've tried to forget,
You're all that I am,
Take me home,
I'm through fighting it,


I've pretty much secluded myself for the past few weeks. I can't *think* straight when you're around anymore. I know you're hurt by it, but I need to figure this out by myself. I just...it's something I have to do.  

Broken,
Lifeless,
I give up,
You're my only strength,

Without you,
I can't go on,
Anymore,
Ever again

I talked to Max today, of all people. God, this situation has really gotten me fucked up. I told him about my obsession with you, and the weird fuzzy feeling I get when I see you, and how you made me feel happy and content for the first time in years.

I feel like punching the kid as he smiles happily at me and just says that I'll have to figure it out on my own. Can't he see that that's not working for me?! I just hmmph and walk away, and Max runs off to go tell Tyson. He knows what this is, I know he does. Hell, everyone probably knows what this is but me. 

My only hope,
(All the times I've tried)
My only peace,
(To walk away from you)
My only joy,
My only strength,
(I fall into your abounding grace)
My only power,
My only life,
(And love is where I am)
My only love.



Damn it! Damn everything to every conceivable hell in this world! I know what this stupid feeling is now!

...It's love.

I've fallen in love with you. This cannot be happening. Love is a weakness! It makes you susceptible to hurt and pain, and I think I've taken more than my share of that!

I need to get away from this, from you, from this stupid emotion. I'm fine with *liking* you, and being *attracted* to you, but *love*? I can admit that the idea scares the shit out of me.


I can't run anymore,
I give myself to you,
I'm sorry,
I'm sorry,
In all my bitterness,
I ignored,
All that's real and true,
All I need is you,


Well, I don't think my feelings matter anymore, because I just screwed everything up. You came to me today and asked me what was wrong, and I snapped at you to get the hell away.

Now I feel like a complete asshole. Your eyes filled with hurt, then rage, then you just seemed empty and walked away. I didn't mean it, but I can't take it back.

When night falls on me,
I'll not close my eyes,
I'm too alive,
And you're too strong,
I can't lie anymore,
I fall down before you,
I'm sorry,
I'm sorry

You and I aren't speaking now, and I feel...empty. It's like whatever hole you filled inside of me has been torn open again, and it's wider than before.

The nightmares are coming back, even though you still sleep next to me. You look miserable every day. Maybe...maybe there's a chance you love me too?



My only hope,
(All the times I've tried)
My only peace,
(To walk away from you)
My only joy,
My only strength,
(I fall into your abounding grace)
My only power,
My only life,
(And love is where I am)
My only love

That would be too good to ever be true. If you loved me back...I would be the happiest I've ever been. But I don't think you do. You could be sick of having to help me through everything and never getting affection in return.

I try, but I'm still not used to much physical contact. We hug and kiss and hold hands or whatever, but we're both not ready to take things any further.


Constantly ignoring,
The pain consuming me,
But this time it's cut too deep,
I'll never stray again

This situation is affecting everything. I can't even blade right. I got beaten by Max, for God's sake! You just didn't bother. I'm guessing you didn't want to risk losing Drigger again if you couldn't concentrate.



My only hope,
(All the times I've tried)
My only peace,
(To walk away from you)
My only joy,
My only strength,
(I fall into your abounding grace)


I've got to tell you. This is ridiculous, and there's no reason we should be apart. I need you. I know it's stupid, and I know it's weak, but I do. And if being together helps the both of us, then it's going to happen.

My only power,
My only life,
(And love is where I am)
My only love,
My only hope,
(All the times I've tried)
My only peace,
(To walk away from you)


Hopefully if you don't love me I can pass off my confession as a joke or something so you won't hate me.

...Wait, this is me. I've never actually made a joke before. So I guess I'll just die of humiliation if you doesn't return my feelings. And God, do I ever sound sappy. 

My only joy,
My only strength,
(I fall into your abounding grace)
My only power,
My only life,
(And love is where I am)
My only love

I call you and you come outside. I'm still watching the sky and I know you're watching me, and I know you're upset.

As we sit down, I wrap an arm around you and pull you closer to me, feeling better already. I'm trying to get my nerves up, and I finally apologize to you. I'm not used to it, and I hope you don't make a big deal out of it. Thankfully, you just hug me closer, and I know you forgive me.

"I've been thinking...a lot, about what's been going on with us, and after awhile I figured out what I need to say to you", I say.

You look worried, and then depressed, and I take a deep breath before saying, "I think...I think I love you, Rei". I wait for a harsh rejection, but it never comes. Then all of a sudden you jump on me and kiss me. Not that I'm complaining, of course.

We come up for air, and I say breathlessly, "I take that as a good sign?". Wow, was that ever stupid. But any embarrassment I feel over those words dissipates when you lean your head on my chest and say, "I know I love you, Kai".

Those are the most beautiful six words I've ever heard, and all the stress is lifted from me, and I feel ecstatic. I can tell that I'm smiling–it's been quite a few years since I've done that–and I run a hand through your hair, sighing contentedly.

Now this is the way life should be.

The end! (again). Review, please! What did you think? What should I do next, or is this the end of the songfic series? Let me know!