With A Dash Of Lemon Juice

By Madame Plot Bunnie

 

    Getting drunk was a fine way to forget one's troubles.

At least, that's what Severus Snape thought, as he sat at the bar in the Leaky Cauldron, with half a dozen shot glasses that had once been filled with brandy.

   Severus sighed and rested his head on his fist. Becoming hopelessly drunk on the night before the required date that all teachers were due back at Hogwarts was his own, dear sardonic tradition. He set the tiny glass, now empty, down on the bar. He was not looking forward to the start of term.

Well, Severus mused, that was a bit of an understatement. Such as saying, 'the night is dark' or 'the sea is deep.'

   It wasn't that he didn't like his title as Potions Master, oh no, but the children! 'Teacher' was a bit of a loose term; he taught, but could never be sure that the students learned anything. If he hadn't felt so obliged to Dumbledore…

   Then I'd probably be a professor at the University, Severus thought to himself, motioning for the bartender for more alcohol. Now there was a real job. The students there were dedicated to the art and study of Potions, not like the halfwits he usually taught.

   He scowled in disgust and tipped back another shot of brandy. Oh glorious alcohol…

Still, he supposed, he had a lot to be grateful for. Voldemort was finally gone, gone for good; killed by The Boy Wonder in his seventh year. No more Death Eater get-togethers for him!

Of course, there was still the matter of his life. Or lack thereof, the nastier part of Severus's brain said. Well. Severus couldn't deny that. He often found himself alone; after all, the only person who gave a hippogriff's arse about him was Dumbledore.

Ah, said the nasty little voice again, which Severus thought sounded suspiciously like his mother, that's your own damn fault, now, isn't it? Maybe if you weren't such a nasty, horrible person then people would like you better!

In response to that, Severus toasted himself and knocked back a glass of FireWhisky.

   As he sat on his stool, mulling over his pathetic state of drunkenness, Severus heard the door to the pub open, felt the wave of humid late-August air sweep into the cool room. He didn't turn around. Probably some damned happy couple out enjoying themselves…

   A young witch came up to the bar. She sat dejectedly down on the stool, and Tom the bartender came right up.  Severus paid her no mind until he heard her say, "Please, Tom, strongest Vodka you have—with a dash of lemon juice."

   Severus looked up from his brandy glasses. Must be an experienced drinker, this one, he thought amusedly, eyeing the witch.

   The woman—or girl, she couldn't have been much over 20—was quite pretty, even though she looked a real mess.  Her eyes, which were deep brown, Severus noted, were red and a little puffy as though she had been crying. Her cheeks were tinged pink, and her hair, which was dark toffee brown and curly, was tied back in a hasty ponytail. Altogether, the witch was quite something to look at.

   Severus watched in fascination as the woman's drink was brought to her. She gave a small smile to Tom the bartender, before consuming the entire contents of her glass in one gulp.

   Severus shot an abashed look at his meek brandy, before looking back at the witch. She looked strangely familiar to him, but with all the alcohol in his system he couldn't quite place her. Surely he'd remember a witch so attractive, wouldn't he?

   Tom came back and replaced her empty glass with another full one. He patted the woman's hand in a fatherly fashion, saying,  "Want to talk about it, deary?"

The young woman smiled wanly and shook her head. "No, thanks Tom. Not yet. Thanks for the offer." Her voice seemed teary. Tom patted her hand again, saying, "Just be careful, lass. Just be careful," before disappearing to the back room.

   The woman chuckled darkly to herself. She picked up her new glass, and Severus distinctly heard the words "all men" and "bastards". He silently laughed. One of the Broken Hearted, this one.

   The Potions Master sighed and stared glumly at his collection of glasses. Severus had never been "involved" with anyone. Of course there had been women before. Back in his school days, once or twice in his Voldemort days, but after that, nothing. He had never found the thought of being "in love" with anyone particularly desirable.

   Which was precisely why he was sitting alone in a bar with a dozen empty shot glasses in front of him.

   A small sniffle was heard from the other end of the bar. The beautiful witch now had six tumblers in front of her, all lined up in a row, and another one in her hand. She caught Severus's eye and turned to face him properly. She smiled (Severus's heart did a little dance) and raised the glass to him, toasting him.

"Here's lookin' at you, kid," she said before swallowing her vodka. Severus smiled back and raised his glass in a similar fashion. "The same to you, beautiful," he said. Suddenly realizing what he had said, he cringed, but the witch didn't seem to mind. She blushed prettily and beckoned for him to sit next to her. Severus gladly obliged and took the stool next to the gorgeous girl.

   "All alone?" she asked, her big brown eyes sparkling from the alcohol in her system. Severus chuckled. "You have no idea."

She laughed too, sucking on a lemon from her drink. "Me too," she sighed. "All alone…" she trailed off, looking rather sad for a moment. On impulse, Severus took her hand reassuringly. She grinned and gave him another drink.

   As they talked, she more and more entranced Severus. Sure, he was piss drunk, but he could still tell she was wonderful and full of life. And full of liquor.

   "Dis ish fun, ishn't it?" Severus slurred about half an hour and one split bottle of vodka later, when both of them were laughing so hard they had to hang onto the bar for support. The brunette witch giggled, hanging on to her chair as thought it was her lifeline.

   She sat up straight (was it straight? Severus couldn't tell; his eyesight was getting blurry) and said "Well I gotta go. Work" she began to snicker, "work to-tomorrow!" She made to stand up, but promptly lost her balance and fell flat on the ground.

   Severus unsteadily got off his stool and bent down to help her up. "Why thank you," she said, grabbing onto his arm. Severus pulled her up, but she stumbled on one of her high heels and fell into his chest.

   "Oops!" Severus said, overcome with inebriated laughter. The witch clung onto him and laughed into his shirt, her whole body shaking with giggles. Severus noted her hair smelled like vanilla. She was a petit little thing; she barely came up past his shoulders. He himself was a stately six foot two.

   "I'll help you outshide," Severus offered, extending a would-be gallant arm, if not for the drunk state. She smiled and took his arm. "Why thank you, good sir knight!" she said gamely.

   The pair walked away from the bar, leaving it scattered with glasses, looking the like bar scene in Raiders of The Lost Arc.

   They stepped out into the balmy late-August night air. The back alley was deserted. They walked in zigzagging lines to the garbage bins, still tittering from time to time. Suddenly, the pretty young witch stopped.

   "You know," she said, leaning back against the brick wall to steady herself, "I feel like I've met you somewhere before. Like I know you. I just can't place you in my mind…" she stopped, chuckling. "That sounds like a horrendous romance novel, doesn't it?"

   Severus laughed too. "Or like a terrible cliché," he said quietly. It never ceased to amaze him how amusing everything always seemed when one was drunk.

   "Maybe…maybe we'll meet again someday. It was…so fun. Kay? But now I gotta go home!"

Severus felt a wave of anxiety pass through him. He had just met a wonderful woman, vibrant and funny and who could hold her liquor, and now she was just going to leave. He'd be alone again. Teaching those little buggers. Alone.

   "Wait!" he said wildly, running a hand through his black hair. The woman stopped and stared at him expectantly. "Wait," he said, moving closer, feeling the rush flow through his blood. Her eyes watched him, studied him. "Just—" he paused, thinking of what to say. "I wanna tell you shomthing, sweetheart!"

   The combination of alcohol and adrenaline is a dangerous one. It can make one do odd, impulsive things that one enjoys while it lasts but ends up regretting later. Severus set the all-star example, like a poster boy for Why Not To Drink.

   He leaned forward and kissed the girl. She made a small gasp of surprise against his mouth, but made no effort to move away. Severus, or rather the alcohol in Severus, took this as an invitation and pulled her closer, pressing his lips hungrily on hers. Her hands placed themselves on his shoulders. Severus's hope flickered—

   And then she pushed away.

   "I—I—I don't even know your name!" the brunette said, backing away. Severus felt his face burn with shame. He took a step toward her, but she held out a hand. "We're both really drunk. Maybe it's better we don't get to know each other. I—I have to go."

"No, just wait a sec—" Severus said, trying to explain, but she Disapperated with a small pop!

   Severus stared at the wall. Well, you stupid git, the little voice, clearly drunk with malice, sang in his head. You've lost her. Senseless prick. Couldn't keep a woman to save your life, Snape old man!

   Severus sighed. Just as well. He'd have to go home and pack anyway. And get rid of his drunken state before heading back to the school tomorrow.

   And get that motherly nagging voice to stop hurling insults at his head.

*~*~*~*

Hello there! A short little Authoress's note:

   This story will be quite long, I think. I'll try to update at least once a week, if not more. I do know where this story is going and I'm going to make up a lot of back stories that may or may not contradict the upcoming Book Five. (Anybody else counting down?) IF they're severely contradicting I'll fix 'em.

ALSO:  although I've been writing since I was like six or something, this is my first chapter story. I'd be forever indebted to you if you reviewed!! (HINT HINT) Also also: could somebody fill me in on exactly what a beta-reader does?

Thank you!