Buffy carried Connor while Angel and Hank carried in the baby stuff. Angel
had the carrier and Hank had the baby bag filled with clothes and diapers
and bottles. Xander and Giles were back at the SUV unloading Hank's things
and the flowers Buffy had received from fans and coworkers. Willow and
Lita walked next to Buffy cooing at Connor along with Buffy. Spike came
out of the office and greeted them.
"Wow, this is a big place you've got." Hank said, putting the baby bag down on the living room floor. Buffy cleared her throat and Hank looked at her strange. She motioned towards the baby bag. "Well, where do you want it?"
"The nursery." Angel said. "She wants to keep the house clear."
"Oh." Hank put the bag in the nursery. Buffy heard him whistle. "This is really some place you've got. How much did it cost to get this place done?"
"A lot more than you've got." Buffy said. She was a little agitated with her father. He kept trying to butt in on her life because this was her first child and he insisted that she didn't know what she was doing.
"Buffy, I know you've got that whole depression thing that comes with having a baby.."
"Which is exactly why you're going to leave her alone and let me help her out." Lindsey said, walking in with six year old Gabriel trailing behind her.
"Dad, you can take Gabriel up to the pool room to play in the little castle thing Angel bought. Connor's not going to be big enough to play in it for a while. Might as well have someone play in it other than Spike." Buffy said.
"Hey! I resent that." Spike said. "I wasn't playing in it. I was making sure it was safe for Connor." Buffy smiled at him and lightly bounced Connor as Spike came over and played with him.
"All right." Hank held his hand out to Gabriel. "Come on Gabe. Let's go."
"Why daddy? I want to help sissy with the baby." Gabriel said. "Can I Buffy? Please? He's my nefu!"
Buffy handed Connor over to Angel with a kiss on her baby's head. Then she bent down to be eye level with Gabriel. "Hey Gabe, how about you go with dad and I promise that later this week I'll take you to the big toy store and buy you anything you want. We can even take the limo."
"Can Angel come?"
Buffy looked up at Angel. "What do you say Angel?"
"Sure. I'll come." Angel said with a smile.
"Can Connor come too? I think Connor wants to go to the big toy store too!"
"We'll see." Buffy said. "Go with dad now, ok?"
"Ok sissy! Can I give Connor a kiss?"
"Sure." Buffy stood back up and gently took Connor back into her arms. She knelt down again, Connor held securely in her arms, and allowed her little brother to place a small and quiet kiss on Connor's forehead.
He smoothed Connor's soft hair down and said, "I.. I could be the one to look after
him sometimes, if you need a helper. Can I take care of him?"
Buffy smiled sadly, the words reminding her of when her mother had brought Dawn home from the hospital when she was five. Angel recognized the words too and stepped up next to Buffy. "Sure Gabriel, you can help take care of him."
"Yay! Thank you! Ok daddy, let's go." Gabriel grabbed Hank's hand and dragged him to the elevator. A minute later, they were gone.
Buffy stood back up and silently thanked Angel. He kissed her forehead and then looked down at their son. "Hey little guy. Who's got you huh?" He shook Connor's hand gently. "Is that mommy that's got you?" Connor gurgled and grabbed onto Angel's thumb. "Yeah. Your mommy and I love you very, very much. We're not going to let anything happen to you."
"We promise." Buffy said.
Angel looked up at her. "We promise." He agreed.
Later that night, the first cries started. Buffy sat up at the same time Angel fell off the bed. She laughed and got out of bed, heading towards the nursery. Angel collected himself and followed her. They got in and found Connor staring up at the ceiling screaming his little head off. Buffy smiled and picked him up. Connor's screams turned to whimpers. Angel smiled and headed to the kitchen to make a bottle. Lindsey was already in there starting the bottle.
"Hi Angel." Lindsey said.
"Hi Angel!" Gabriel said. He was perched on a stool and eating a bowl of cereal.
"I heard Connor start to cry and figured I'd start a bottle for him while you guys woke up and got to him."
Angel rubbed his face and ran his fingers through his hair. "Thanks."
"What's going on?" Buffy asked from behind him. He turned and found Connor dozing in her arms.
"Lindsey beat us to the kitchen." Angel kissed her disheveled hair and smoothed it out before kissing his son's soft little head of hair.
"And me! I beat you too!" Gabriel said.
"I see that." Buffy said with a smile.
Gabriel ran up and tugged on Buffy's PJ pants. "Can I see him? Please?"
"Come on." Gabriel followed Buffy into the living room and jumped up onto the couch and waited patiently for Buffy to sit next to him. She sat next to him and shifted Connor so he was facing Gabriel. "Here ya go."
"He looks like you!"
"You think?" Buffy gazed at Connor in wonderment.
"Yeah! Look, he has your hair and when he opens his eyes, his are the same color as yours! They're pretty and blue! Like mine! See?" Gabriel opened his eyes wide and Buffy looked at them with a smile.
"You know where we got those eyes?"
"No."
"Dad has the same eyes we do."
"Why?"
"Um.. You, uh.. You have to have something from the daddy."
"What does Connor have that's Angel's?"
"Well, he has Angel's bone structure.."
"What's that?"
"The way he's shaped. See how his cheekbones look like Angel's?"
"Oh! Is that it?"
"No, Connor has his daddy's mouth and nose and he has Angel's hands and feet."
"Who's hands do I have?" Gabriel held his hands up.
"You have Lindsey's hands. Dad's hands look a lot different than that."
"Do you have daddy's hands?"
"No, I got my mom's hands. See." Buffy held her hand up.
"Was your mommy as nice as my mommy?"
Lindsey walked into the living room and handed Buffy Connor's bottle. "No, her mother was a lot nicer than me. You would have loved Joyce."
Buffy smiled at Lindsey, silently thanking her. Connor made a disapproving noise and Buffy switched his position so she could give him his bottle in a more comfortable position for both of them.
"I'm going to put Gabe to bed and let you two have you're first night alone with your son." Lindsey said, taking Gabriel's outstretched hand. "Come on kiddo."
As soon as they were gone, Angel flopped gently on the couch next to Buffy and watched her feed the bottle to their son. His eyes were filled with love and wonderment that had gushed out of his heart and now radiated out of every poor in his body. Buffy had been right, there was no way that they were going to let their son know what they were. Sure, they would tell him about Sunnydale, just leave out the part about the Hellmouth and all the bumps-in-the-night it attracted. And of course they would tell him about Dawn, but they would leave out the part about her once being a mystical Key that Buffy had sacrificed herself for when a hell god opened a portal with Dawn's blood that would have destroyed the world. Connor would obviously know about Willow and the others, but he wouldn't find out that Willow was a powerful witch and Giles was once a Watcher to Buffy when she was a Slayer.
"Angel? You wanna feed him?" Buffy asked.
"I don't know how." Angel replied, looking a little uneasy.
"It's not hard. You know how to hold him and change his diaper, now it's time to learn how to feed him. Here." Buffy gently handed Connor over to Angel who took the baby with care. He was afraid if he squeezed him even the tiniest bit Connor would break. Once his son was settled in his arms, Angel took the bottle from Buffy and brought it over to Connor's mouth. At first Connor refused the bottle and he started to wriggle. Buffy giggled. "You're holding him wrong."
"What? How am I holding him wrong? This is the way I always hold him."
"Exactly. You have to hold him more up so he can get his bottle." Buffy lifted Angel's arm lightly so Connor was in a better position. "Like this." Angel tried again and this time Connor happily took the bottle.
"You know, this is a weird shaped bottle." Angel said, observing the bottle that was tilted near the end.
"It's so the baby can get milk easier while the parents can stay comfortable. Willow bought it."
"I swear, I'll probably never get used to some of these inventions you people make."
"You will. Especially now that I get to live long enough to help you learn them."
"Right, the whole 'you will not age until the End of Days is averted' thing. THAT'S going to take a lot of getting used to."
"More so for me. This is the freakiest thing that has ever happened to me."
"Out of all the really freaky things that have happened to you?"
"Yup. And this now includes little Connor here." Buffy ran her finger down her son's cheek and watched the little chest heave as if Connor had sighed with contentment.
"How are you feeling?"
"Tired." Buffy laid her head down on Angel's shoulder and he wrapped his arm around her. They sat there watching their son drink his milk. "And here I thought getting the crap knocked out of you by a hell god hurt."
"Are you healing ok?"
"I'm sore. My hips hurt the most."
"Does it hurt to sit down? Maybe you shouldn't sit. I'll move so you can lie down."
"No." Buffy stopped Angel from standing. "I'm fine. It doesn't hurt to sit as bad as it does stretch. When I stretch it tugs on my hips and they haven't exactly situated back to their normal-ness. It'll go away soon."
"Is that why you sit scrunched up?"
"Yeah. It hurts less." Buffy sighed. "Angel, don't worry about me. I'll be fine. I just had a baby, give me time."
"You're my wife. I love you. I get to worry."
Buffy smiled and took the bottle away. Connor had started to doze and they still needed to burp him. Buffy put the bottle in the sink and was startled when Spike walked in from the dining room. "Spike!"
"Buffy!"
"What the heck are you doing scaring me like that?"
"Sorry. I was just up. Vampire, remember?"
"I remember." She avoided his eyes and walked back to the living room. Angel had gotten her a burp rag and she took it, slinging it over her shoulder.
"Hey Spike." Angel said, handing Connor over to Buffy. "Where's Lita?"
"Hey Peaches. She's asleep. You look tired."
"Yeah? I guess it could be that I've been up for the past half-hour taking care of my son in the middle of the night. Add that to barely being able to sleep for the past two and a half months and, yeah, you've got tired."
"It's amazing."
"What is?"
"You've completely forgotten what you are."
"Shut up Spike."
"You're a vampire man! You're supposed to stalk the night saving damsels in distress and shag your Slayer during the day."
"Spike, if you want to be outside when the sun comes up, keep talking." Buffy hissed, trying not to disturb Connor.
"And you! You're the bleedin' Slayer! You're a hero!"
Buffy rolled her eyes and walked to the nursery. Spike started to go after her, but Angel moved quicker than a normal human and blocked the bleached vampire's movements. "I haven't forgotten what I am. Neither of us has forgotten."
"Then why do you fight it?"
"Because it's not our life anymore. We're happy here." Angel walked towards the nursery.
"You can't just stop being a vampire. It's what you are. And what about the prophecy? Remember the one where your kid is the ultimate warrior?"
"He'll never know about it. He'll never know about any of it." With that, Spike was left staring after Angel.
Angel walked into the nursery and found Connor sleeping in his crib and Buffy curled up in the rocking chair, trying not to cry. Angel walked over and picked her up, taking her into their bedroom. He laid her on the bed and then crawled over her to lay facing her. She had started to cry.
"He's right, you know." Buffy said softly.
"Yeah." Angel said, stroking her arm gently.
"I can't go back to that though." Buffy's tone hardened just a bit. "It just has too many bad memories. Dawn wouldn't have even existed if I hadn't been the Slayer. And Dawn would have never been killed right in front of me if I hadn't been the Slayer." She sniffed and her tone went back to soft. "The only good thing I ever got out of being the Slayer is you. It's the one thing I would never take back."
Angel brushed his thumb over her cheek and wiped away a tear. "And you're the one good thing that ever came out of being a vampire. But now we have Connor. Nothing will ever take him away from us. He's not going to know about any of it. I can't bring myself to open the door into that dark world and hold it open for our son and allow him to know that kind of terror and pain." Buffy sniffled and nodded. "Sleep lover. I'll take care of Connor if he wakes up again." Buffy turned onto her other side and scooted against Angel. He cupped her back with his chest and held her closely to him, trying not to squeeze as she drifted off to sleep.
Surprisingly, Connor only cried two more times that night. Both times, Angel was the one that got up. Buffy tried to go help him, but he forced her back to sleep. She was still exhausted from having Connor and she was still hurting from it too. As he took care of Connor, Angel wondered how it must feel like for normal women who didn't have Slayer healing power.
"Wow, this is a big place you've got." Hank said, putting the baby bag down on the living room floor. Buffy cleared her throat and Hank looked at her strange. She motioned towards the baby bag. "Well, where do you want it?"
"The nursery." Angel said. "She wants to keep the house clear."
"Oh." Hank put the bag in the nursery. Buffy heard him whistle. "This is really some place you've got. How much did it cost to get this place done?"
"A lot more than you've got." Buffy said. She was a little agitated with her father. He kept trying to butt in on her life because this was her first child and he insisted that she didn't know what she was doing.
"Buffy, I know you've got that whole depression thing that comes with having a baby.."
"Which is exactly why you're going to leave her alone and let me help her out." Lindsey said, walking in with six year old Gabriel trailing behind her.
"Dad, you can take Gabriel up to the pool room to play in the little castle thing Angel bought. Connor's not going to be big enough to play in it for a while. Might as well have someone play in it other than Spike." Buffy said.
"Hey! I resent that." Spike said. "I wasn't playing in it. I was making sure it was safe for Connor." Buffy smiled at him and lightly bounced Connor as Spike came over and played with him.
"All right." Hank held his hand out to Gabriel. "Come on Gabe. Let's go."
"Why daddy? I want to help sissy with the baby." Gabriel said. "Can I Buffy? Please? He's my nefu!"
Buffy handed Connor over to Angel with a kiss on her baby's head. Then she bent down to be eye level with Gabriel. "Hey Gabe, how about you go with dad and I promise that later this week I'll take you to the big toy store and buy you anything you want. We can even take the limo."
"Can Angel come?"
Buffy looked up at Angel. "What do you say Angel?"
"Sure. I'll come." Angel said with a smile.
"Can Connor come too? I think Connor wants to go to the big toy store too!"
"We'll see." Buffy said. "Go with dad now, ok?"
"Ok sissy! Can I give Connor a kiss?"
"Sure." Buffy stood back up and gently took Connor back into her arms. She knelt down again, Connor held securely in her arms, and allowed her little brother to place a small and quiet kiss on Connor's forehead.
He smoothed Connor's soft hair down and said, "I.. I could be the one to look after
him sometimes, if you need a helper. Can I take care of him?"
Buffy smiled sadly, the words reminding her of when her mother had brought Dawn home from the hospital when she was five. Angel recognized the words too and stepped up next to Buffy. "Sure Gabriel, you can help take care of him."
"Yay! Thank you! Ok daddy, let's go." Gabriel grabbed Hank's hand and dragged him to the elevator. A minute later, they were gone.
Buffy stood back up and silently thanked Angel. He kissed her forehead and then looked down at their son. "Hey little guy. Who's got you huh?" He shook Connor's hand gently. "Is that mommy that's got you?" Connor gurgled and grabbed onto Angel's thumb. "Yeah. Your mommy and I love you very, very much. We're not going to let anything happen to you."
"We promise." Buffy said.
Angel looked up at her. "We promise." He agreed.
Later that night, the first cries started. Buffy sat up at the same time Angel fell off the bed. She laughed and got out of bed, heading towards the nursery. Angel collected himself and followed her. They got in and found Connor staring up at the ceiling screaming his little head off. Buffy smiled and picked him up. Connor's screams turned to whimpers. Angel smiled and headed to the kitchen to make a bottle. Lindsey was already in there starting the bottle.
"Hi Angel." Lindsey said.
"Hi Angel!" Gabriel said. He was perched on a stool and eating a bowl of cereal.
"I heard Connor start to cry and figured I'd start a bottle for him while you guys woke up and got to him."
Angel rubbed his face and ran his fingers through his hair. "Thanks."
"What's going on?" Buffy asked from behind him. He turned and found Connor dozing in her arms.
"Lindsey beat us to the kitchen." Angel kissed her disheveled hair and smoothed it out before kissing his son's soft little head of hair.
"And me! I beat you too!" Gabriel said.
"I see that." Buffy said with a smile.
Gabriel ran up and tugged on Buffy's PJ pants. "Can I see him? Please?"
"Come on." Gabriel followed Buffy into the living room and jumped up onto the couch and waited patiently for Buffy to sit next to him. She sat next to him and shifted Connor so he was facing Gabriel. "Here ya go."
"He looks like you!"
"You think?" Buffy gazed at Connor in wonderment.
"Yeah! Look, he has your hair and when he opens his eyes, his are the same color as yours! They're pretty and blue! Like mine! See?" Gabriel opened his eyes wide and Buffy looked at them with a smile.
"You know where we got those eyes?"
"No."
"Dad has the same eyes we do."
"Why?"
"Um.. You, uh.. You have to have something from the daddy."
"What does Connor have that's Angel's?"
"Well, he has Angel's bone structure.."
"What's that?"
"The way he's shaped. See how his cheekbones look like Angel's?"
"Oh! Is that it?"
"No, Connor has his daddy's mouth and nose and he has Angel's hands and feet."
"Who's hands do I have?" Gabriel held his hands up.
"You have Lindsey's hands. Dad's hands look a lot different than that."
"Do you have daddy's hands?"
"No, I got my mom's hands. See." Buffy held her hand up.
"Was your mommy as nice as my mommy?"
Lindsey walked into the living room and handed Buffy Connor's bottle. "No, her mother was a lot nicer than me. You would have loved Joyce."
Buffy smiled at Lindsey, silently thanking her. Connor made a disapproving noise and Buffy switched his position so she could give him his bottle in a more comfortable position for both of them.
"I'm going to put Gabe to bed and let you two have you're first night alone with your son." Lindsey said, taking Gabriel's outstretched hand. "Come on kiddo."
As soon as they were gone, Angel flopped gently on the couch next to Buffy and watched her feed the bottle to their son. His eyes were filled with love and wonderment that had gushed out of his heart and now radiated out of every poor in his body. Buffy had been right, there was no way that they were going to let their son know what they were. Sure, they would tell him about Sunnydale, just leave out the part about the Hellmouth and all the bumps-in-the-night it attracted. And of course they would tell him about Dawn, but they would leave out the part about her once being a mystical Key that Buffy had sacrificed herself for when a hell god opened a portal with Dawn's blood that would have destroyed the world. Connor would obviously know about Willow and the others, but he wouldn't find out that Willow was a powerful witch and Giles was once a Watcher to Buffy when she was a Slayer.
"Angel? You wanna feed him?" Buffy asked.
"I don't know how." Angel replied, looking a little uneasy.
"It's not hard. You know how to hold him and change his diaper, now it's time to learn how to feed him. Here." Buffy gently handed Connor over to Angel who took the baby with care. He was afraid if he squeezed him even the tiniest bit Connor would break. Once his son was settled in his arms, Angel took the bottle from Buffy and brought it over to Connor's mouth. At first Connor refused the bottle and he started to wriggle. Buffy giggled. "You're holding him wrong."
"What? How am I holding him wrong? This is the way I always hold him."
"Exactly. You have to hold him more up so he can get his bottle." Buffy lifted Angel's arm lightly so Connor was in a better position. "Like this." Angel tried again and this time Connor happily took the bottle.
"You know, this is a weird shaped bottle." Angel said, observing the bottle that was tilted near the end.
"It's so the baby can get milk easier while the parents can stay comfortable. Willow bought it."
"I swear, I'll probably never get used to some of these inventions you people make."
"You will. Especially now that I get to live long enough to help you learn them."
"Right, the whole 'you will not age until the End of Days is averted' thing. THAT'S going to take a lot of getting used to."
"More so for me. This is the freakiest thing that has ever happened to me."
"Out of all the really freaky things that have happened to you?"
"Yup. And this now includes little Connor here." Buffy ran her finger down her son's cheek and watched the little chest heave as if Connor had sighed with contentment.
"How are you feeling?"
"Tired." Buffy laid her head down on Angel's shoulder and he wrapped his arm around her. They sat there watching their son drink his milk. "And here I thought getting the crap knocked out of you by a hell god hurt."
"Are you healing ok?"
"I'm sore. My hips hurt the most."
"Does it hurt to sit down? Maybe you shouldn't sit. I'll move so you can lie down."
"No." Buffy stopped Angel from standing. "I'm fine. It doesn't hurt to sit as bad as it does stretch. When I stretch it tugs on my hips and they haven't exactly situated back to their normal-ness. It'll go away soon."
"Is that why you sit scrunched up?"
"Yeah. It hurts less." Buffy sighed. "Angel, don't worry about me. I'll be fine. I just had a baby, give me time."
"You're my wife. I love you. I get to worry."
Buffy smiled and took the bottle away. Connor had started to doze and they still needed to burp him. Buffy put the bottle in the sink and was startled when Spike walked in from the dining room. "Spike!"
"Buffy!"
"What the heck are you doing scaring me like that?"
"Sorry. I was just up. Vampire, remember?"
"I remember." She avoided his eyes and walked back to the living room. Angel had gotten her a burp rag and she took it, slinging it over her shoulder.
"Hey Spike." Angel said, handing Connor over to Buffy. "Where's Lita?"
"Hey Peaches. She's asleep. You look tired."
"Yeah? I guess it could be that I've been up for the past half-hour taking care of my son in the middle of the night. Add that to barely being able to sleep for the past two and a half months and, yeah, you've got tired."
"It's amazing."
"What is?"
"You've completely forgotten what you are."
"Shut up Spike."
"You're a vampire man! You're supposed to stalk the night saving damsels in distress and shag your Slayer during the day."
"Spike, if you want to be outside when the sun comes up, keep talking." Buffy hissed, trying not to disturb Connor.
"And you! You're the bleedin' Slayer! You're a hero!"
Buffy rolled her eyes and walked to the nursery. Spike started to go after her, but Angel moved quicker than a normal human and blocked the bleached vampire's movements. "I haven't forgotten what I am. Neither of us has forgotten."
"Then why do you fight it?"
"Because it's not our life anymore. We're happy here." Angel walked towards the nursery.
"You can't just stop being a vampire. It's what you are. And what about the prophecy? Remember the one where your kid is the ultimate warrior?"
"He'll never know about it. He'll never know about any of it." With that, Spike was left staring after Angel.
Angel walked into the nursery and found Connor sleeping in his crib and Buffy curled up in the rocking chair, trying not to cry. Angel walked over and picked her up, taking her into their bedroom. He laid her on the bed and then crawled over her to lay facing her. She had started to cry.
"He's right, you know." Buffy said softly.
"Yeah." Angel said, stroking her arm gently.
"I can't go back to that though." Buffy's tone hardened just a bit. "It just has too many bad memories. Dawn wouldn't have even existed if I hadn't been the Slayer. And Dawn would have never been killed right in front of me if I hadn't been the Slayer." She sniffed and her tone went back to soft. "The only good thing I ever got out of being the Slayer is you. It's the one thing I would never take back."
Angel brushed his thumb over her cheek and wiped away a tear. "And you're the one good thing that ever came out of being a vampire. But now we have Connor. Nothing will ever take him away from us. He's not going to know about any of it. I can't bring myself to open the door into that dark world and hold it open for our son and allow him to know that kind of terror and pain." Buffy sniffled and nodded. "Sleep lover. I'll take care of Connor if he wakes up again." Buffy turned onto her other side and scooted against Angel. He cupped her back with his chest and held her closely to him, trying not to squeeze as she drifted off to sleep.
Surprisingly, Connor only cried two more times that night. Both times, Angel was the one that got up. Buffy tried to go help him, but he forced her back to sleep. She was still exhausted from having Connor and she was still hurting from it too. As he took care of Connor, Angel wondered how it must feel like for normal women who didn't have Slayer healing power.
