Ok, at the suggestion of my dear friend Colleen, Here's a little bit of background information about the Disney Adventure. We keep making references to it, so you should know. In a different round-robin the two of us did, Colleen and I were spending April vacation in DisneyWorld. While there, we kidnapped Patriots QB Tom Brady and held him hostage on the 13'th floor of the Tower of Terror at MGM. Our other two obsessions, Charleton Heston and Anthony Hopkins joined us. Drew Bledsoe, the former Pats QB also made a guest appearance. He tried to kill Tom out of jealousy. We stopped him and made him sorry. Colonal Fron was the military man in charge of the hostage negotiations. He was a severe mommy's boy psychopath who hated Col and I. And, once again, we hate apes!!!! 'Kay, that's all. I'll be posting the Disney adventure as well.
(Empire State Building)
Spider-man: Um…thanks…it's nice to have fans, but I don't do autographs.
Amanda: Oh, we don't want an autograph…
Colleen: We're after something a little more…"fun".
Amanda: (whispers nervously) Umm, we're not gonna rape him or anything, are we, Col?
Colleen: (whispers back) No! I didn't mean it that way!
Spider-man: Oh dear.
Colleen & Amanda: MWHAHAHAHA!!!!
Spider-man: Hey, why is my name hyphenated? I just noticed that.
Amanda: Never mind that!
Spider-man: Ok…um…who are you girls anyway? And how did you get up here?
Colleen and Amanda: We're…(drum roll)…The Fan Club Stalker Girls! (dramatic reverb)
Spider-man: No way! The same ones who kidnapped my friend Tom Brady?
Colleen: Tooooom…(swoons)
Amanda: Col! You're drooling again. And yes, we're the sweet, wholesome, angelic girls who "borrowed" Tom for a while.
Colleen: (chokegagchoke) Ahem! Yes, sweet and angelic. Right. Of course. Sorry, had something stuck in my throat for a minute there…
Spider-man: Oh dear. I think I'm in trouble…
Amanda & Colleen: BWAHAHAHAHA!!!!
(Frau Chane's German Class, back at GHS)
Frau Chane: Katrin! (Colleen's German name) Olivia! (Amanda's German name)
Hey! Where are Katrin and Olivia? (looks at sign on their desks) "Gone for tissues"? "Be back in 5"? Wo sind sie?!?! (Wo sind sie = Where are they?)
Class: Sie sind tot! (They are dead!)
Frau Chane: Grrrr.
Sam: Dum-de-dum-dum….
(John and Patti's boat, 10 miles offshore)
(John and Patti are Colleen's parents. They're with Ken and Carol, Amanda's parents.)
Carol: Thank you so much for inviting us out on your boat!
Ken: Yeah! This is cool! Does it go faster?
John: Sure! Watch! (boat warps to Mach 1)
Patti: Slow…this…down!
John: (sulks) Yes dear.
Ken: Man, you girls are no fun!
John: Yeah, but it could be worse. Colleen and Amanda could be out wreaking havoc again.
Patti: (smacks head) Moron! Are you trying to jinx us?
Carol: (knocks on side of the boat) Knock on wood!
Ken: The boat is made of fiberglass…
Carol: Dammit!
John: Maybe nothing will happen. Colleen seemed perfectly normal this morning when we sent her off to take the MCAS test…
All four: Uh-oh!
(Empire State Building)
Amanda: Turn around!
Spider-man: What? Why?
Colleen: We want to admire the wonderful quality of spandex!
(Suddenly, a dark shape is seen in the sky coming from a distance. In Goblin-esque form it cackles madly as it zooms to the building)
Sider-man: Don't worry, girls. It's just another psycho out to kill me. I'll handle this!
Colleen: Hoooray! We get to see him in action! But Ama…
Amanda: Yes…that cackle did sound familiar…
Spider-man: Pfft!
Mysterious Evil Villian: BWAHAHAHAHA!!!! At last the moment I have waited for! You are doomed…You crazy Fan Club Girls!
Spider-man: What?!?!
Amanda & Colleen: I knew it!
One last thing to clear up: Frau Chane, our dear German teacher, is adamant about students bringing their own kleenex to school. If a student is sick and asks her for a tissue, she lectures them about how, when she was young, students brought their own kleenex. She also plays the bagpipes. We love "die EisenFrau". (The Iron Woman) Anyway…stay tuned for the next episode, where you'll discover the Mysterious Evil Villian's true identity…Mwahahahaha!!!!!!
