Hello all! This is a happy little author's note. Ok, I'm lying. It's actually shameless self-promotion. Please, please go read my other story, Tom Brady Meets the Fan Club Girls. What an original name, huh? ;-) Anyway, it's about what happens in Disney. It's funny and random, and also written by Colleen and I during German class. I love that class. Hehe. Anyway, the story is also under Chipmunk Queen. So please, go find out for yourselves why we keep making references to that story. And thank you all so much for reading and reviewing! I love you all, and Col sends a big hug. I personally find that creepy, but hey, that's Col for ya. ;-) Thanks again! Now, on with the fic…

****

(Above Poorly-lit Alleyway)
Spider-man: Don't worry, Mary Jane! I'll save you! Wait…Mary Jane? (looks around) MJ? Ok, I see the scary muggers looking around, but there's no sign of MJ. Hmm…
(In Poorly-lit Alleyway)
Amanda: Now, remember, Col; we must not beat the crap out of those pathetic muggers!
Colleen: I know, I know…but it's so tempting!
Amanda: Yes, those poor fools are no match for us, but how are we supposed to get Spidey to save us if we don't need to be saved?
Colleen: True…true…let's go.
(Muggers surround girls. They are gross and dirty and smell like cat butt.)
Mugger #1: Hey pretty girls!
Amanda: (completely deadpan) Oh no. We are trapped.
Colleen: (in an extremely dramatic Southern accent) Oh my! (throws hand to forehead) What eva shall we do?!?!
Amanda: If only Spider-man were here!
Mugger #2: C'mon, give us all your money! (shoves Amanda)
Amanda: Hey! You son of a— (grabs thief by shirt collar)
Colleen: Cough_InnocentVictim_Cough!
Amanda: Oh yeah…(woodenly) Not my money! I was going to give it all to the starving little orphans! Oh, where is Spider-man?
(Muggers and girls look expectantly towards building. Five second pause…nothing happens.)
Crickets in distance: Chirp!
Colleen: We said, Oh where is Spider-man?
Amanda: Cough_that'syourcue_cough!
Spider-man: Oh yeah… (swings down) Have no fear! I'll save you!
(Airplane, or Flugzeug if you prefer)
Frau Chane: Hans! Franz! Repeat after me! Geben, gab, gegeben!
John and Ken: (monotone) Geben, gab, gegeben.
Frau Chane: Gut. Essen, ass, ge— (is interrupted by giggles coming from John and Ken.) What, may I ask, is so amusing?
Ken: You said "ass"!
Frau Chane: No, if I wanted to say "ass", I would have said "arsch". As in, Ihr habt dicken arsche.
John: We do not!
(John and Ken vainly attempt to inspect the size of their bums, and in doing so, fall on their faces.)
Ken: Shit!
Frau Chane: "Shicken" means to deficate. Let's conjugate it. Ich shicke, du shickst…
John: She's teaching us how to swear in a foreign language!
Ken: Cool!
(The same airplane, as far away from Ken, John, and Frau Chane as possible.)
Carol: Perhaps we should take them out of that German class.
Patti: That is where they come up with all of their ideas…
Steward: Excuse me, would you ladies like some coffee?
Carol: Sure…Hey, do we know you?
Patti: You look awfully familiar…
Steward: Er…um…you must be mistaken! (scuttles away)
Carol: Was that…
Patti: I think so…
Carol & Patti: Uh-oh!
(German Class)
Emily: Well, that was interesting.
(A figure appears in the doorway.)
Emily: Not again…Oh hello Mr. Brundig! N…no, Frau Chane isn't here. N...New York, I-I think…O-o-okay…H-Have F-f-fun!
(Figure leaves. Emily is still shivering with fear.)
Sam: Dum-de-dum…Hey, was that Vice Principal Brundig? He's really creepy…Dum-de-dum…
Emily: Yes…yes he is. He reminds me of one of those bad guys from the X-Files…and now he's following Colleen and Amanda…
TBC