The New London crowd returned to their city in the afternoon, a long caravan of horses picking their way along the trail that had sprung up between the Zanga village and New London. Isabella carried Nathaniel behind her and Layton shared his horse with his younger sister. Lord Roxton lead the way, with the children following him and Finn bringing up the rear behind the Malones and Challenger.

When they entered the city it was early evening and Isabella was exhausted. She came into her room to find that Henry and Edythe had completely cleaned and rearranged her room. She was amazingly thankful for that because many things about the room tended to remind her of Gabrielle.

That bitch for leaving Nathan like that, she thought, dropping her things by the door and hobbling over to her bed. Even in leaving she couldn't keep from hurting people. How the hell was Isabella supposed to raise an abandoned five year old? Actually, come to think of it, she'd been raising poor Nathan for years. Still....

Despite the day's events, the last person on Isabella's mind as she drfited into a restless slumber wasn't Nathan, Gabrielle, Layton, or Cobi; it was her mother.

~*~*~

"The Lady sleeps ill at ease tonight," Henry sighed, emerging from his young mistress's chamber with the day's laundry.

Edythe, a maid who had been with the Roxton family since its arrival in New London, looked up sadly, gathering young Nathan's clothes from the sleeping boy's door. "As well M'lady should. Her lady mother appears from no where then disappears again into the night. Aye, and she also ran Miss Woods from our midst. Poor Nathan-boy, his mum abandoning him to the Lady's whim. She that Gabrielle hurt every day must now decide the child's fate."

"Yet our Lady chooses to keep the boy here, continue to raise him as he's been raised for years. It is her kindness that saves him from an orphanage."

"And her trust in Him, perhaps, that has kept her going through the cruelty," Edythe added, motioning toward heaven with her eyes.

They dumped the soiled clothing in the washroom.

"Edythe, say a prayer for our Lady tonight, that He shall ease her pain and clear her mind."

"As always, Henry. 'Tis the same prayer I've said every night for our poor Lady."

~*~*~

The pipe organ bellowed its hymn and the congregation joined in, standing and holding their hymnals up.

Isabella, Nathan and John sat in the normal Roxton front pew, where the family had been sitting since moving to New London. Layton was in the pew behind with his family.

As with any good Anglican church, there was much sitting, then kneeling, then standing. It was like a morning aerobic exercise. Isabella went through the motions as any good girl raised in the Church of England does, out of instinct. She felt no emotion in the reciting of the Lord's Prayer and the Apostle's Creed, nor did she feel the nerve-tingling sense of awareness as she crossed herself. Her mind remained blank during the Prayers of the People and her lips moved themselves through the hymns. All this scared Isabella.

Church had been the one constant for Isabella and had served as her sanctuary. She'd never known Gabrielle to set foot inside the church. She probably would've been struck down where she stood if she had. Church had always //meant// something to her because through it all she never stopped believing that her God would save her.

Today, now that He finally had, her words of penitence and praise rang strangely false because she was undeniably //distracted//. Distracted by the feeling of Layton's eyes on her. Distracted by the situation she'd landed herself in with her two best friends. Distracted by the fate of abandoned Nathaniel. //Distracted// by memories of her mother.

She had so many of those in the very pew she now sat in. There were permanent scuffs on the wood from Jack and Isabella's younger days, from warm mornings when they just honestly couldn't sit still another second longer. That was when their mother would help them escape through the back door. It was the same pew that she had slipped off of her first Sunday morning and hit her head on the marble floor. Her mom had to bribe her with tons of sweets just to get her back into the sanctuary. And then suddenly the church had become a far better place for the four-year-old because of the funny faces her mum greeted her with. It was because she liked going that her faith had grown. Her mother, the most unreligious person she knew, had begun Isabella's own faith journey.

Now that she'd seen her mother again and had all of these memories returned, Isabella just couldn't pull her mind from the hurt, anger and despair of being left behind once again.

Somehow the service ended and she filed out, attached to Nathaniel's hand to pull herself along. Layton caught her arm and turned her to look into his concerned eyes.

"Let's talk," he offered his arm and disconnected her from Nathan. Pointing towards a group of boys kicking a ball around, "Look, Nathan-boy. Christopher and Harry are playing football."

Nathan smiled and ran off.

Isabella just nodded and linked her arm with Layton's while still in her half-aware state. He could see the tears gathering at the corners of her eyes but she quickly called them into retreat as they left the hubbub of the departing congregation.

~*~*~

"I hate her!" she cried angrily. The silver tray hit the wall and clattered to the hard wood floor of the manor.

"Don't lie, Isabella. You're horrible at it," Layton replied coolly as he was nonchalantly lounged on a sofa pushed against the back wall of her room.

"I shouldn't be!" she raged. "Not with my genetics. I should be an expert, my mother being who she is."

"Shut up," he sighed. "You know very well you are nothing like her. Jack was always more like your mother."

"He was never a sneaky, lying, back-stabbing snake who would leave me the first-chance he got," she sighed, plopping onto the bed.

"No, he wasn't," he agreed, never taking her blue eyes from her as she got up again. She was pacing, barely listening to his comments.

She was beautiful, he thought, even when she was mad. Maybe even especially then, when fire lit her steel gray eyes and anger rosed her cheeks.

"I can't believe I //wanted// to find her! What was I thinking? Just setting myself up for loss and heartbreak. Didn't I have enough?"

His eyes drifted from her figure to her cheek again, now laced with tears.

"Oh, Bella," he sighed, his heart clenching tighter. It killed him to see her cry. She looked at him, in one second morphing from a fiery brand to a broken little girl.

Layton stood, going to her and enfolding her in his arms. Isabella let her lead fall to his shoulder and sobbed, every breath rocking her frame.

"Shh," he soothed, rubbing her back, running his knuckles up and down her spine. "Just let it all out."

"Doesn't she love me? Doesn't she want me? I'm her daughter! She's supposed to...."

"I know, I know. I don't understand either." He kissed the top of her head.

The door opened behind them and Layton looked over his shoulder.

"Bella," he whispered in her ear. "There's someone here to see you."

She lifted her head and wiped the tears from her face. Half-laughing, she looked into his eyes and smiled.

Leaning up to his ear, she whispered, "Thank you," and then kissed his cheek.

Stepping from behind him, she saw who was at the door and stopped.

"Mother."

"Isabella."

"I thought you left."

"I didn't get very far."

"Why'd you come back?"

"For you. And your father."

"You could've done that a long time ago."

"I thought I had to deal with my demons on my own."

"And now?"

"I realize that I should've stayed and worked them out with my family."

"If you could leave us, we were never your family."

"Isabella!" Layton objected.

"Shut up, Layton," she scolded, not turning from Marguerite.

He backed away, not wishing to incur her wrath.

"I wish it weren't so. I take all blame for what happened. Jack, leaving, even Gabrielle!"

"No," Isabella stonily interjected. "Jack's death is no one's fault. And Gabrielle happened after you were gone."

"But I hired her.."

"And Father screwed her and didn't notice my bruises."

Their identical gray eyes were in a staring match now.

"The only thing you are responsible for is abandoning me, perhaps the worst to be stuck with."

"I'm sorry."

The words hung in the air between them.

"It doesn't even begin to atone for anything. They are meaningless, empty words. But if it makes you feeling even a tiny bit better, I apologize."

Isabella turned away slightly, regaining her composure. Layton saw this action and smiled reassuringly at her.\

"If it makes you feel any better, it does. A little. And I'm partial to starting to forgive you," Isabella said bravely, turning back to her mother.

"Thank you," Marguerite whispered.

Isabella grinned that Roxton smile.

"Father!" she called, moving past her mother to the door. "Dads! Tell Henry to set the table for one more!" Then she continued. "C'mon Layton, you're coming with us."

"What? Where are we going?"

"To Professor Challenger's. He's been keeping some stuff for me."

Marguerite and Layton exchanged a puzzled look and followed the girl they both held dear out of the door.