Disclaimer - If I owned Gluhen I would decrease the damn angst by 80%. As it is, I do not and therefore cannot.
This story takes place after Gluhen ends. I have not seen the episodes, but I have read synopses. Any mistakes I trust you will be kind about.
Afterglow
By Felflowne aka Espion
Chapter 9
We will become evil itself
'Ken?'
Ken turned toward the girl.
'Yes?'
'Why the fuck did you come after me?'
He sighed.
'Are you insane? Is that it? Are you goddamned unhinged? Look at me!'
She grabbed his head and twisted it around so he was facing her.
'Look at you,' she hissed, 'and look what you've turned into! A shell! Where's the friendly, emotional, fiery guy who I used to know?'
Ken didn't answer. He rested his head back against the wall.
They were in a cell, which had obviously never been used before. It was basically a small, pale room with a heavy door on it. There was no furniture, and the lighting was flickering slightly.
'It's like you died, Ken… Who are you now?'
She was still talking, and she was evidently quite upset, but Ken didn't understand why. He hadn't shouted, nor lost his temper, so how was this a bad thing?
**
'Is it necessary? She said she was working alone.'
The three men walked in a triangle shape, with the shortest of them slightly behind the other two. Junochiro Kadachi had been speaking.
Now, his superior, Sora Shiguru, replied.
'And you take her word for it? This is standard procedure my lad, and when you've been in Kritiker as long as I have, then you can question my methods.'
'You gentlemen please proceed,' came the quiet voice of someone who was superior to both of them from behind, 'I'll open the door and have someone escort Miss Merrose to see you.'
The two men bowed respectfully.
'Yes, Takatori-san.' They walked on. Mamoru reached in his pocket for the key, but then something he heard made him pause.
**
'It's because of Takatori, isn't it?' asked Alishe, her anger finally dissipating and being replaced by pleading, 'Takatori's the reason you're like this… Or is it… Do you hate me because I tried to kill him?'
'No,' said Ken, 'I get your motives.'
'So let me get this straight,' said Alishe in a defeated voice, 'you love this guy, right?'
'Right.'
'And he doesn't love you?'
'It would seem not.'
'And you don't care?'
'No.'
Alishe took a deep breath.
'Tell me,' she said slowly, 'is there anything this boy could possibly do to make you stop loving him?'
Ken thought.
**
On the other side of the door, Mamoru tensed. He shouldn't be listening to this, this was private… But it was about him. He rubbed his chest absentmindedly, noting how his heart rate had accelerated, creating a kind of ache there.
Good God, what am I thinking? What's happening?
**
'No, nothing.' Ken said with an air of absolute finality.
Alishe sighed.
'Well he sure as heck doesn't deserve someone like you. I've said it before, and I'll say it again.'
**
Mamoru swallowed and leant his head silently on the door.
Ken would love him no matter what he did.
It made him feel like dirt.
Shaking himself to try and stop the trembling that had started to attack his wrists and fingers, he slid the key into the lock.
**
Nagi escorted Alishe to the interrogation room. She displayed no outward emotion, but Nagi could sense her fear. It was bizarre, because usually it was only a vague feeling, but here, it was so clear he could have been in her shoes himself. He could almost hear what she was thinking, which shocked him, as that wasn't an ability he'd been aware he had.
The door was opened, and Alishe walked in with no nudging, her head held high. Nagi did not enter the room, but settled down in a nearby chair ready to escort her back to the cell, and to help her walk if necessary. It was not unheard of for prisoners to be thusly afflicted.
He heard the bolt on the door of the soundproof room scrape closed.
**
Mamoru finished his work for the day early, and sat about for a bit wondering what he should do next. Why had he hurried so?
He didn't think interrogating Alishe would give them any useful information. If she was a rogue, as Nagi had suspected, then she would have indeed worked alone.
Vacantly, he rose to his feet and left the room.
He'd gotten used to his job now, he could do it without any of the old pangs of regret or sadness, but was this a good thing or a bad thing.
It was good because feelings and weaknesses had no place in a job like this.
It was bad because sometimes he didn't feel human anymore.
He stopped walking and looked around.
He was standing outside the makeshift cell.
Why did I come here?
Suddenly about a thousand questions he wanted to ask the man inside exploded inside his head.
No, don't go in there… Go to bed instead, you're tired.
Can't remember the last time I admitted that…
But in his inattentiveness, his hand had slipped into his pocket and retrieved the key. Looking at it, the internal arguments seemed to fade.
'Alright,' he sighed.
**
Outside Alishe's interrogation room, Nagi was reading a paper again, when someone crept up behind him and smashed something hard and heavy into the back of his head.
**
Ken looked up as the door opened.
'Hello? Who's…?'
His voice died as Mamoru walked into the room and closed and locked the heavy door behind him.
'Can I talk to you?' Mamoru asked in a businesslike way.
'Uh…yeah, sure,' Ken answered incoherently.
The other boy walked over to him and sat down next to him, a respectable distance between them.
'How's your shoulder?'
'Huh? Oh, fine I guess…er…'
Wahey! Blind him with your verbal prowess Ken! Not.
'I'm sorry.'
Mamoru jumped a bit.
'What for?'
'If I hadn't been such a total prat I could have figured out what Alishe was planning earlier and stopped her.'
'Why did she come to kill me?'
'I don't know,' answered Ken truthfully.
**
Nagi landed on the floor of the corridor, pain and fear rushing through him.
How did someone creep up on me?
He managed to lift his head a little. The corridor was empty. He put his hand to his head, and it came away clean and dry. There was no wound, nor, he realised, prodding with his fingers, was there any mark at all.
**
Ken cleared his throat.
'So, er, how have you been?'
Mamoru looked up to find Ken looking at him expectantly.
'I've settled into the job,' he said levelly, 'and I'm confident I can fulfil my duties adequately.'
Ken sighed quietly.
'Fine, you don't want to talk to me, but I can still ask… How are you?'
Mamoru blinked.
'Ah. Good. I'm good.'
'Right,' said Ken glumly, 'I'm glad.'
**
Nagi climbed back into his chair. Had he just had a migraine? Was that what they were like?
No, it felt exactly as though someone hit me from behind.
No sooner had he had this thought than a ripping pain scored itself down his back and a scream echoed around his head, one that he hadn't heard.
Leaping out of his chair and pressing his back against the wall to stop the throbbing pain, Nagi was forced to listen to the scream bouncing around his head time after time.
What's happening to me…?
**
Well this is exciting, thought Ken despondently, bet you didn't figure this was how your reunion would go…
Actually, I had a pretty good idea…
'Um…' Mamoru shifted uncomfortably against the wall, '…I suppose I ought to tell you that I heard what you and Bengal were talking about before I came in earlier.'
Ken struggled to remember what they had been talking about, but then it came back to him. They'd been talking about Mamoru.
'Oh that, well, doesn't bother me.'
'Doesn't?'
'Nope.'
'But you said…'
Mamoru trailed off. Just what did he want Ken to say? That none of it was true? That he didn't love him anymore? Did he want to hear him deny it? Why was he pushing him?
'I know what I said.'
'I think Bengal is right.'
'I knew you would.'
'And you know me, do you?'
'I used to.'
Mamoru winced. It hurt because it was true.
**
Alishe screamed, unable to hold it in her head anymore. She was dying, this was it.
'I don't know anything!' she yelled, 'it's true, I swear!'
'Well call us crazy but we aren't just gonna take your word for it like that,' said the taller of the two men, snapping his fingers to accompany the word 'that'.
'But…it's true…'
'Try again, Juno.'
This time the pain nearly knocked her unconscious, and for a few hazy moments, she was floating, away from the pain. A little hand reached out to her.
'Naworu…' she whispered, reaching out, but then a splash of ice cold water shattered the dream.
**
'I won't try to defend what I did. I don't need to,' said Mamoru mechanically, 'because I did what was needed. There's no shame in that.'
Ken didn't answer at once, but appeared to be thinking. When he did answer, it was in a sad voice.
'You're not okay, are you?'
This one sentence caused such a reaction in Mamoru that it scared him. It was as though someone had punched him and brought tears to his eyes. He blinked incredulously.
How can he affect me like this?
**
'Who's Naworu?' cried Sora triumphantly. 'Now we're getting somewhere!'
'Naworu…' sobbed Alishe, 'help me…'
**
'I don't see how it matters to you,' he said practically.
Ken looked up at him.
'Are you nuts? Have you actually gone mental? Of course it matters to me!'
'Why?'
'Because I love you,' said Ken simply, and utilising the shocked reaction this caused, quickly continued, 'and that means I care whether or not you're happy.'
'Happy?' said Mamoru bitterly.
'That's right.'
'You forfeit that here.'
'No job is worth that.'
'No! You're wrong!' cried Mamoru, jumping to his feet. Ken noticed with a kind of grim satisfaction that it was still within his capacity to feel about some things.
'This job is important! It's bigger than you or me….'
'You don't believe that.' Ken said in a low voice.
'I do!'
'Your eyes are saying, "help me".'
'Stop it!' gasped Mamoru, turning sharply away so Ken couldn't see his face.
**
The pain in his back had subsided enough for him to pull away from the wall now, but Nagi was feeling increasingly uneasy.
Then it happened again.
'…woru…help…'
He looked up and down the corridor in alarm, but he knew deep down the words were in his head.
He stumbled as another blinding bolt of pain hit him from the side.
'It's the interrogation! I can feel it! Gotta stop it!'
He pulled himself upright and hammered on the door with all the strength he could muster.
**
Ken hated himself. As he looked at the other boy who had his back to him, he realised just how much the person he'd known as Omi was having to deal with.
'I'm sorry,' he said quietly.
Mamoru didn't answer.
'I had no right to talk to you like that.'
Mamoru turned.
'I'm so tired,' he said in a voice barely above a whisper. Taking a step forward, he unintentionally displayed this by tripping over his own feet.
**
'Wait, what's that noise?'
'Someone's banging on the door,' said Junochiro, glad of the interruption.
'Open it and tell them to get lost,' grunted Sora, 'we're making progress.'
Junochiro frowned. He opened the door, but no one ever knew if he would actually have obeyed Sora or not, because as soon as the locks slid back, a lean brown-haired boy was in the room before Juno could stop him.
'S-Sir?' asked Sora, eyes widening as he recognised Nagi.
Nagi nodded to both of them.
'This ends now,' he said coldly, 'this girl has no useful information, cease molesting her at once.'
'Y-Yes sir, stuttered Sora, dropping what he had been carrying and scuttling back a few steps.
'Please leave.'
'But Sir!'
'Now!' snapped Nagi, and he accompanied this order with a mental kick.
The two men scrambled out of the room.
**
'Watch out!' cried Ken, jumping up and catching the boy before he could land flat on his face.
For a second nothing happened. Ken subconsciously tightened his arms around Mamoru, who did likewise to him. They sank to the floor, Ken still supporting the other boy.
'Tired…' said Mamoru in the same tiny voice, '…help me…'
Ken began to get the feeling that this conversation would one of those that never officially happened as far as Kritiker was concerned.
Ken moved so his back was against the wall.
'You okay?' he asked after a long time, quite content just to hold and support his friend, and let him know he was cared about.
Mamoru shook his head against him, and Ken understood. Here, instead of answering the question, 'Are you okay or did you hurt yourself?' which was the one he had just asked, Mamoru had decided to answer his earlier question of 'Are you okay?'.
He'd already known that he wasn't.
Just then, Mamoru seemed to shake himself.
'Ken, no.' he said shortly, pulling back and sitting back down next to Ken, at the same respectable distance apart they'd been before.
**
'They didn't hurt you too much did they?' Nagi asked. The girl had pulled herself into a sitting position.
'You!' she exclaimed, absently touching her shoulder, 'Takatori's bodyguard! Why did you help me?'
'Because you asked me to.'
'No…I…'
'Listen to me. Did they do something to your back?'
Alishe nodded, her eyes bright with fear.
Nagi sighed.
'I don't understand why,' he said slowly, 'but I could feel what they were doing to you.'
Alishe looked shell-shocked.
'But…But how?'
Nagi shook his head. 'I don't know.'
'I…I called out for help…' said Alishe, her words sticking together in their hurry to get out, 'I called my brother…'
'Was he involved in this?'
'No… he's… he's gone!'
'Where?'
'I… I don't know. We got separated when we were very young… It was all my fault… I was supposed to… Naworu…'
'Was that his name?'
'Yes.'
'Why are you telling me this?' Nagi was astounded.
'I… I don't know… I just feel… I can trust you…'
'But I shot you before… and it hurt then too,' said Nagi, remembering.
**
There was no more talk for a long time, and when Ken glanced over at Mamoru again, he realised he was nodding.
He'll fall asleep soon, ah well, he deserves to rest.
As soon as he was sure Mamoru was completely asleep, Ken got up quietly and removed the light bulb, as there was no light switch on the inside of the cell.
There was a window with bars, 'though, but that wasn't much help in turning lights off.
He settled down next to Mamoru again, and let sleep claim him as well.
**
'I'll take you back to the cell,' said Nagi standing up and reaching out a hand. Alishe stared at it.
'Where did you get this?' she asked quietly, pointing to a little indentation on his hand.
'Uhh what? Oh that. I've always had that, as far as I know.'
'Naworu had one in exactly the same place…' said Alishe, as if she couldn't believe this was happening.
For once, Nagi didn't know what to think. He laughed weakly.
'Is it…you? Naworu?'
'I… heard you in my head…' he said helplessly. She smiled.
'We used to talk to each other like that all the time,' she said softly, 'do you remember?'
Nagi began to shake his head, but then he stopped.
******
'Naworu! If you run off I'll never find you!'
'Bleh, onay-chan, gotta catch me!'
'Otohto-chan, don't do this!'
Naworu was grabbed from behind.
'Oh man! You got me!'
'I'm bigger than you.'
'We'll be okay on our own, we don't need anyone, right? Alishe-chan?'
He looked up. His sister was crying.
'O-Okah-san…'
'Alishe-chan, I'm sorry! I didn't mean to make you cry… I miss Mum too… Sorry…'
But then his sister had hugged him with renewed fervour.
'I can't lose you too, got that?'
'Yes…'
******
Nagi looked up at the girl again.
'Onay…ch-chan?'
'Hai!' She threw her arms around him, but then he felt the pain sweep across her back again, so pulled back.
'I-I'm sorry,' she gasped, but he shook his head.
'I'm taking you to the sanatorium, no arguments. Don't lie to me, that really hurt.'
She nodded, although now she was beginning to lose consciousness. As she flopped down to the floor he heard her say, 'I've found you… otohto-chan…'
Nagi picked her up easily and carried her away.
*********************************************************************************************
Hmm, trust me to leave this chapter till second to last, twas a veritable bitch to write, but joy, tis done now…
Only two more chapters to go!
Love
Fel
xx
