Chapter Seventeen - You're
Not the One, But You're the Only One
Everyone makes one
mistake
One more time for old
time's sake
One more time before
the feeling fades
You're not the one,
But you're the only one
who can make me feel like this
You're not the one,
But you're the only one
who can make me feel like sh-t
-"The One,"
Foo Fighters
[Syd's POV]
11:59 AM. Five minutes
before my mission. It's my first in awhile, so I have to admit I'm a bit rusty.
But that little briefing from my handler, Agent Vaughn, in the Janitor's
Closet second period really took away the jitters. And replaced them with Earth
shattering--
Alrighty, enough of
that. This is a PG-13 narrative, now isn't it? No need to turn it into a sleazy
porno flick. Although sleazy porno flicks inolving me and Michael would be damn
nice. Damn nice, yet really really kinky and creepy. Come to think of it, it
would be creepy as Hell. Wow, how do I let my mind go off on these tangents
again?
12:00 PM. Four minutes.
Mission objective: Corner a Ms. Carol Vessey and get some classified intel
about her and a certain Mr. Edward J. Stevens, JD. Once I accomplish that, coax
her into coming with me to the park today after school for a little stroll.
Dead drop location: Basketball court three. And of course the dead drop would
be her, duh. And what do I get if the mission is completed successfully? Spy
sex, baby!
12:03 PM. One minute.
One minute closer to the spy sex. It's all about the spy sex. I know it, you
know it, all of Stuckeyville knows it. Only because
Michael can't keep his big mouth shut (not necessarily a bad thing...So dirty!)
and feels the need to spread the news to his little Stuckeybowl posse that is
made up of Ed and Mike of course.
I have to admit, the
looks I get from them are more than verging on wierd. Although the occasional
lick of the lips I get from Ed and pelvic thrust from Mike are good for a laugh
or two.
rrrrrriiiiinnnnngggggg.
Ahh, the sweet sound of
victory.
"Okay, you guys.
Great job today, and make sure you keep up on the reading. I have you guys a
few extra minutes at the end of class today to get started because it's a long
assignment tonight. And watch out for a not so pop pop quiz tomorrow on
chapters nine through twelve."
"Aw man!"
They all groan in unison, practically. You gotta love the power you hold over
your students as a teacher. It's like they are your puppets and you are the
puppet master.
Dance puppets, dance!
Wow, the thought of spy
sex has definitely got me way too hyper.
But, dude, it's SPY
SEX!
Enough of that, now I'm
on the job. Work comes before pleasure. Ha! Yeah, right, I know.
I make my way to
Carol's room and knock on the door lightly before walking in.
"Oh, hey,
Syd!" She says happily, putting some papers away in her desk. "Whatsup?"
She's in a good mood.
Excellent. It's always easier to get someone to talk about something, even if
they aren't too happy with it, when they're happy. Wow, I would so suck at
teaching a class at CST. "The Key to espionage, you ask? Don't worry, be
happy!" It's shocking that I've made it this far.
"I was wondering
if you wanna head over to the Goat for lunch." I say nonchalantly as I sit
down in a students desk.
"That sounds
great! What about Molly?" Molly! I completely forgot! This could have very
well been a lot easier if we kept her in mind. But then again, we were a little
bit preoccupied during the briefing...
"She's got some
meetings with parents during her lunch periods today." I say while
chastising myself in my head. Boyscout was so not prepared! Well, he was
but...
"Ah, sucks for
her!" Carol says excitedly as she puts on her jacket and swings her purse
around her shoulder. "Let's go!"
Wow, she's abnormally
happy today. What the Hell is she on? I want some of it. Oh wait, I don't need
it, I have a Mr. Michael Vaughn to satisfy that sector of the brain. Or body.
Same difference.
~~~
Fifteen Minutes
Later at The Goat
"You're telling me
that Warren Cheswick has given up?!" She asks incredulously before taking
a sip of her iced tea. I nod with a grin. "We must not be talking about
the same Warren Cheswick, then. The Warren Cheswick I know never gives
up when it comes to winning a girl over."
"I don't know what
to tell you," I say, shrugging my shoulders, "he just stopped. I
don't know what happened. You wanna know the even wierder thing? Him and Will
have been hanging out a lot lately...They've seriously bonded. It's
hysterical."
With the sound of
Will's name, Carol immediately perks her head up. Not a good sign. The red
flags have popped up and the sirens are on.
"So, how's Will
doing?" She asks, trying to play off her reaction as she reaches for her
napkin.
"Oh, Will's doing
good. He really loves it here. The not-so-fast pace is really what he needed.
Atleast that's what he says. I know a part of him still misses his old job back
in LA." Okay, why am I talking so much about Will?! I'm not even close to
accomplishing my mission, and if I don't accomplish my mission, I'll be one
angry CIA agent undercover as a substitute teacher. You better believe it.
"But enough about Will. There's something I've been dying to find
out about since I came here, but I didn't know if it was like, off-limits or
something..."
Good way to ease into
the subject, in my opinion. Bravo, Sydney.
"About me?"
Carol asks, confused. Yes, about you, you fool!
"Yeah," I
reply, smiling.
"What?" She's
still baffled by the fact that there's something I've been wondering about her.
Why is that so hard to believe? This girl is clueless. She really is.
"What's the deal
with you and Ed?" I ask quickly, looking back down at my food.
She practically chokes
on her food before taking a long sip of her drink. The exact reaction I was
expecting to get. Interesting, very interesting.
"Well, um,
I--" Stuttering. Also very interesting.
"Oh, well if you
don't want to talk about it, I totally understand." I say immediately.
Time to play the guilt card. "I just felt like we've become such good
friends, and I've told you about everything yet I don't really know anything--"
She reaches her hand
out and places it over mine. Bingo. We're in, baby. Spy sex, here I come.
"The relationship
I have with Ed is complicated."
"Trust me, I can
gurantee you I've heard more complicated things in my life." That's an
understatement, my friend.
She looks down, then up
at me with sad eyes.
"Me and Ed go way
back...All the way back to high school."
"So you guys were
high school sweet hearts?" I ask, hiding my 'awwwwww' pretty well.
"Well, no, not
exactly. Actually, it's more like 'no, not at all.' We both went to Stuckeyville High, but me and Ed...I
guess you could say we were in different cliques."
The joys of high
school.
"Quite frankly, I
didn't even know who he was until he came back to Stuckeyville." A smile.
Smiles are always good. "He bursted into my class one day dressed in a
suit of armor. I remember thinking 'Oh, God, someone call the police,' but
getting that kind of attention was nice, you know? Well, creepy, seeing that I
had no clue who this guy was or what he was doing there, but still sweet
nonetheless. From that point on, he made it his mission to win my love. He did
some of themost cheesy things I have ever seen, but..." Her voice fades
away as her smile does.
"What? Then why
aren't you guys together? There are so many gaps in this story it's not even
funny."
"I had someone in
my life. A jerk, but someone nonetheless. Then he had someone in his life, and
it just never worked out." She quickly finishes.
"Why do I get the
feeling that you're lying through your teeth?" I ask, leaning over the
table.
She shakes her head
then turns away.
"Come on, Carol,
you can tell me anything," I say reassuringly. She looks back at me with a
sad smile, tears welling up in her eyes. I didn't expect her to get so emotional
so soon. Clearly something happened recently that made her react in such an
outward manner. There's something going on behind the scenes between her and Ed
as we speak. And it's not good. Oh damn. Abort mission! Abort mission!
I'm being way too
overly dramatic. Cool your jets, Syd, everything will be fine. You've never
been one to turn away in the face of a challenge! You rise to the occasion and
conquer all! Because Syd always wins. Always.
"Oh Carol..."
The tears start
spilling, and she starts talking a mile a minute, all of her words slurred
together. Good God, oh good God.
"Shhh," I try
to quiet her, but something has really been building up, and once the flood
gates open, there's no turning back. "Slow down, sweetie."
"I'm not good
enough for him." She says sternly, wiping the tears away from her eyes.
"He's never going to realize that. We'd never be happy together, because
in the end, I would somehow ruin the relationship and he'll hate me. And once
that happens I wouldn't have just lost the love of my life, I will have lost
one of my best friends too."
Wow. She's so in love
with him it's frightening.
"Carol, you're not
being reasonable here," I start but she quickly cuts me off.
"You don't know,
Syd, you really don't. All of my past relationships--Trust me, if you'd have
been here for them, you'd completely know where I'm coming from. The worst part
about it all is that I take it out on him. I find a way to make it his fault,
when it isn't. It really isn't. It's all my fault."
"Carol, you're
really talking like a crazy person, here. I'm not even kidding." I say,
trying to hold back the laughter. What?! She is acting like a crazy
person! We might as well ship her off to the looney bin here and now.
She laughs bitterly.
"Okay, even if
everything you say is true, how are you supposed to find out if it's true if
you don't take a chance? Life is about taking chances, sweetie. You can't live
life saying, 'oh I can't do this or that because I know it won't turn out
well.' If you can predict the future, I can flap my wings and fly."
Syd the comedian, gets
them everytime. She laughs slightly before turning back up towards me with a
desperate expression on her face.
"Syd, you really
don't understand what's going on here."
"Okay, fine, maybe
I don't but even if that's the case, I know that keeping all of this bottled up
inside isn't healthy. It's not good for you, and not good for him either. Just
go and talk to him. Please. For my sake."
She looks at me with a
hint of confusion in her eye. She may be on to me, but I don't care at this
point. She clearly loves him but has some sort of pyscological issue that won't
let her be happy, and I'm not just going to sit and watch two people who belong
together fight it for absolutely no reason! It's insane!
"I don't
know--"
I look at my watch
quickly, then back up at her.
"Hold that
thought. I gotta head back to class." I hear her sniffle and wipe her nose
with a napkin as I get up hastily. "But I still want to talk to you. Meet
me at the park after school. Around 4:30ish."
"Okay," she
replies softly.
Trust me, I was
competely thrown off guard by her little outburst there, but that means that
this is more serious than just a little "hook-up." I know it may seem
strange that all of a sudden I'm interested in her and Ed's relationship, but
you gotta do what you gotta do sometimes. Even if it makes you seem a little
suspicious.
Mission objective
comleted. All I have to do now is make the drop. Sweetness.
~~~
[Vaughn's POV]
"Let the battle of
the coasts begin." Mike says dramatically as he passes the ball to me.
"You guys are
seriously in for the biggest ass kicking of your lives. No doubt." I say
as I start to dribble the ball, warming my arm up.
"No doubt?
Michael, Michael, Michael. You'll never learn, will you?" Ed jokes,
shaking his head sadly. I laugh and turn to Will.
"Back me up here,
don't people say 'no doubt' back west?" I ask.
"Well, yeah,
people say 'no doubt' everywhere. But face it, dude, you really shouldn't be
one of them." Damn this Will. I may be cool with him and he may be
becoming a good friend of me and the guys but still, you don't diss Mikey V.
Okay, maybe they're right. Aging: every man's worst enemy.
"Enough of this,
let's get to the game." I say as I fake Ed out and make the sweetest layup
they've ever seen. I'm a showman at heart, I really am.
"Okay, this is
war." Mike says taking the ball and checking it. "War."
~~~
We're going on our
second game and Syd still hasn't arrived with Carol. What is this?! I thought I
made it pretty clear what the parameters of this mission are. She makes the
drop, I satisfy her every sexual desire.
I still don't think her
stipulation was fair. I somehow have to find a way to get Ed shirtless before
they show up because, according to her, "skin is good." She seemed to
have forgotten that it's the middle of February, but whatever. All I know is
that I have to get this man shirtless without coming off as the least bit gay
before she comes here, or I'm kicked out of the room for a week. Damn, that
girl drives a hard bargain. And she's so sex driven it's scary. Scary.
"Is it just me or
is it getting a little hot out here?" I ask, starting to pull off my
sweatshirt.
"What are you
talking about, man? It's like 45 degrees." Will replies, looking at me
like I'm an oompa-loompa or something. The man is so clueless. SO clueless.
"I don't know what
you guys are talking about, I think it's pretty hot out here." The only
way I can do this is leading by example. No pain, no gain. I pull off my
t-shirt and feel like yelping in pain as the cold air hits my bare skin, but I
have the feeling that if I scream like a little girl in front of Ed, I'll
regret it for a long time.
They all stare at me
like I'm absolutley insane, but I play it off.
"Let's go."
It really is hard to stop yourself from convulsing in pain from the bitter
cold.
"Alright, man,
whatever you say." Mike says picking up the ball again.
You would think that
getting your blood pumping and running around would warm you up, but that's so
not true. All it does is make more wind hit you. Cold wind. Wind isn't cool.
Wind is the devil. Wind needs to go home and never come back.
"Ow-ow. Nice
tan." I turn around as I hear a female voice call out to me.
I turn around, looking
at the other guys, then back to her. "Are you talking to me?"
"Yeah, you. Are
you busy tonight? Maybe we could catch a movie or something." Good lord,
I'm being hit on. I'm being hit on! Life is good. The woman is pretty,
but I must admit, she pales in comparison to Syd. But then again, everyone
does.
I blush (yeah, that
doesn't warm me up either) then shake my head as I bounce the ball.
"Sorry, I've got a girlfriend."
"She's a lucky
girl," she says licking her lips. Must. Restrain. The. Desire. To. Jump.
Her. Dude, what am I thinking? She's so not Syd. She walks up to the court, and
faces me. "Well in case things don't turn out so well," she pulls out
a card and writes her number down quickly. "I'm Sam." She discreetly
tucks her number inside the waistband of my pants then turns around.
Whoa there.
"Hey! I'm
available!" Will calls out as she leaves.
"Dude, I've never
seen that happen ever to anyone. You are..." Ed's voice trails off
as he starts peeling clothes. SWEET! "A genius."
"Yeah, man,
seriously." I turn around, and now Will's doing the same thing. Fool! Put
your clothes back on!
All of a sudden, I see
Syd and Carol make their way towards the basketball courts. That's my cue...
"Well, guys, I
think I should get going." I quickly pull out "Sam's" phone
number from my pants and hand it to Will. "Have fun."
"Oh, I will!"
He exclaims, staring at the number in awe. It's like the man has never seen a
woman's phone number before.
"You can't tell me
you're leaving already!" Ed exclaims as I jog towards my stuff.
"Yeah, sorry. I
have to prep for class tomorrow. I'll see you guys later though." I pick
up my stuff, and turn around to see Syd.
"Oh, hey Syd! What
are you doing here?" She grins wildly, and I so know why. What a horny
woman. But hey, I can't say I'm complaining.
"I was just
walking with Carol here--" She turns to Carol, but she has her eyes locked
on Ed's. Hmm, maybe showing skin is the way to a girl's heart...
"Oh well, yeah, I
guess I should get going..." Mike says immediately, picking up the ball
and walking towards Will. "Right Will?"
"What? Nah, that's
alright, I'll stick around for a little--" Mike proceeds to grab Will's
elbow and pull him away. Thank you, Mike, thank you. Because God knows I would
have bitch slapped him if he got in the way of this "moment" between
Ed and Carol.
"I guess, we
should get going too--" Syd says, motioning for me to join her. I quickly
grab my stuff and walk towards her. I start to put on my T-shirt and I hear Syd
whisper to me.
"I think it's
working..."
I pull my head through
my shirt and look back at the court. Carol has walked up and is face to face
with Ed, who has, thank God, gotten his shirt back on.
"Of course it
did." I say triumphantly as I pull my sweatshirt over my head. Syd loops
her arm around mine and a grin spreads across my face.
"Job well
done." She whispers seductively. "Three for the price of one."
"Are all men just
objects to you?!" I say in mock anger. "Because if that's the
case--"
"If that's the
case, what?" She asks, smiling.
"If that's the
case..." Oh Hell. You know what I'm going to say. "I'm all for it.
I'm not one to turn down getting laid by a hot girl. No matter how shallow she
may be."
Yeah, I so asked for
that smack.
"I'm not
shallow."
"Uh-huh. Says the
girl who would only set Carol and Ed up if she got sex in return. Uh huh,
yeah."
"What can I say, a
girl's gotta look out for her own well being also."
I love this town.
END CHAPTER
SEVENTEEN
